Icann

[Phelia]

This could be good.

They could have terrorists kidnap Chuck Norris' Transport Layer and demand the addresses be shortened from 128 to 64 bits. Then Jean-Claude could fly in via hovercraft and drop a payload of eels upon them, carrying a virus which would generate millions of ICMP messages with high TTLs, slowing the Internet to a crawl. The rest would be a mop-up operation which would involve blowing the terrorists to bits with high caliber automatic weapons and incendiary grenades.

Then the Internet would be converted to the OSI model under control of the good ol' US of A to insure such a crisis could never happen again.

I think it's absolutely incredible, but I think it needs a little romance (sorry, I'm a sap). Maybe the hovercraft has a sentient OS that is secretly in love with a root server?

*Zoooom!*

I heard it as more of a "whoosh"ing noise.

Yes..... someone in the government said that. It must be true.

So, you don't trust the US government enough to accept a very simple statement, but you definitely want to keep them in charge of the internet. That's consistent!

You're right again. They should have contacted you for a quote instead of those dirty fucking feds. It sounds like you've glanced at least four or five sensationalized headlines about this, so you're the expert!

 

[IrezumiKiss]

No problem! But, for future reference, before you make a thread, you probably want to check if:

a) someone has already made a thread covering that topic or

b) your thread is nothing more than a vapid, frothingly partisan C&P article with absolutely no regard for accuracy or reality.

In this instance, your thread has been rendered pointless on both counts.

http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/joffslap1.gif

Oh! The owning, it hurts soooo much!

You're whole life is pointless, do us all a big favor and get on your fucking broom and go for a ride around the block.

http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/joffrey-sniffling.gif

See, you know you've been bitch-slapped by the best in the biz when you can't even differentiate between your/you're...and your walk-off move is a rolleyes emoticon!

http://img3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130820204929/random-ness/images/8/8c/Hysterical-laugh.gif

So, you don't trust the US government enough to accept a very simple statement, but you definitely want to keep them in charge of the internet. That's consistent!

You're right again. They should have contacted you for a quote instead of those dirty fucking feds. It sounds like you've glanced at least four or five sensationalized headlines about this, so you're the expert!

http://static4.fjcdn.com/thumbnails/comments/Critical+hit+_de7d81c5cfadac81ad78d57cfa9a3471.gif

Again! Phelia is counting coup today!

 

[VaticanAssassin]

So, you don't trust the US government enough to accept a very simple statement, but you definitely want to keep them in charge of the internet. That's consistent!

!

and I said I wanted to keep them in charge where?

Oh, I am sorry. Where you assigning me a position again? You do love to do that huh? It's rather cute.

When someone will not tell you what will happen, but they will tell you what wont happen,................. they are probably lying.

 

[Sean]

These people that think the US government are in charge of the internet at the moment are hilarious.

 

[Phelia]

http://static4.fjcdn.com/thumbnails/comments/Critical+hit+_de7d81c5cfadac81ad78d57cfa9a3471.gif

That is amazing AND true to life

and I said I wanted to keep them in charge where?

Oh, I am sorry. Where you assigning me a position again? You do love to do that huh? It's rather cute.

Vat, it really doesn't matter to me what your position is. It's clear enough that you have no idea what you're talking about and decided to swoop in and try to pull a "gotcha" on me because you were too lazy to sniff out the facts for yourself.

When someone will not tell you what will happen, but they will tell you what wont happen,................. they are probably lying.

That is a very nice sentence. Wherever did you get it? It reads like something that came out of your ass. Let me try!

Here are some words and then some other words and now I will type a period.

These people that think the US government are in charge of the internet at the moment are hilarious.

Not after the Kenyan-in-Chief willingly hands it over to the Ruskies.

Now shut up or I am going to send bald eagle wearing an American flag cape to block you from using the google.

 

[kbate]

What kind of drugs is she on?

"controlled the internet"? We created it back in the 60's.

"amoral sexuality"? Admittedly may people are immoral, that is one of the prices you pay with freedom.

"puritan moral codes"?, We refer to them as Christian moral codes.

"liberal monetary system"? Our monetary system is simply a tool to enable trade. It's a lot easier to carry dollar bills to trade for your new cow, rather than dragging 3 sheep to trade.

"and aggressive nature"? Germany ATTACKS France, WW1, we help drive the Huns back.

Germany ATTACKS France AGAIN, WW2, we help drive the Nazi ass wipes back into their holes.

Japan attacks Hawaii, we kick the shit out of them, ONLY resulting to nuclear weapons after Japan makes it clear that they prefer annihilation rather than defeat.

North Viet Nam invades the south, South Viet Nam asks for help, and we send it.

Russia invades Afghanistan, we give the Afghans arms to help drive out the Commie horde.

Sodomized Hussein invades Kuwait, we join a coalition to drive his ass out.

We went back to Iraq when Sodomized refuses to give arms inspectors free access to suspected WMD sites.

Afghanistan refuses to expel Bin Laden, and we attack in response to their murdering HUNDREDS in the WTC and Pentagon attacks, along with those that crashed in Pennsylvania.

Aggression? Russia decides to keep Western Europe after WW@2, North Korea invades South Korea, North Vietnam attacks South Vietnam, Ronald Reagan only bombed Libya after they launched an attack on our aircraft carrier.

Please explain our "aggressive nature".

I am impressed by the breadth and depth of your knowledge base and I wish to subscribe to your blog, newsletter and twitter feed.

 

[Ishmael]

and I said I wanted to keep them in charge where?

Oh, I am sorry. Where you assigning me a position again? You do love to do that huh? It's rather cute.

When someone will not tell you what will happen, but they will tell you what wont happen,................. they are probably lying.

That's the scary part.

ICANN hasn't done the best of jobs. To a large degree they're the reason that the web is so 'leaky.' Security has been kept noticeably lax so that the likes of NSA can backdoor it to the extent they do.

But ITU oversight would be even worse, much worse. Over the past two years ICANN has been moving operations (quantity unknown at this time) to Geneva, where ITU is headquartered.

And if you parse the statement out the UN is NOT eliminated as the ultimate home for ICANN, it is merely stated that ITU will not be the overseeing authority. That leaves the door open for ICANN to be a co-equal entity with ITU but still under UN oversight. Which is no step forward at all.

Ishmael

 

[Phelia]

I am impressed by the breadth and depth of your knowledge base and I wish to subscribe to your blog, newsletter and twitter feed.

Excuse me but you forgot to answer her question about what sort of drugs you're on. She has a right to know.

That's the scary part.

ICANN hasn't done the best of jobs. To a large degree they're the reason that the web is so 'leaky.' Security has been kept noticeably lax so that the likes of NSA can backdoor it to the extent they do.

But ITU oversight would be even worse, much worse. Over the past two years ICANN has been moving operations (quantity unknown at this time) to Geneva, where ITU is headquartered.

And if you parse the statement out the UN is NOT eliminated as the ultimate home for ICANN, it is merely stated that ITU will not be the overseeing authority. That leaves the door open for ICANN to be a co-equal entity with ITU but still under UN oversight. Which is no step forward at all.

Ishmael

Okay, so, you guys are actually just making stuff up. "ICANN hasn't done the best of jobs. To a large degree they're the reason that the web is so 'leaky.' Security has been kept noticeably lax so that the likes of NSA can backdoor it to the extent they do." Lol. Care to elaborate? You obviously have an in-depth understanding.

CERN is near Geneva, too! Maybe we'll give THEM the internet!

Here's a thought: maybe instead of "parsing" a sentence-long news excerpt and using your ace logic skills to reinforce your own opinions, you could like, try and understand what's actually going on? Whatever you seem to think is happening, isn't.

In a late Friday evening conference call, ICANN President and CEO Fadi Chehadé lauded the decision as "historic" and said that ICANN will be moving toward multi-stakeholder control. Chehadé said the US will not permit another country to make an exclusive contract like the US' when 2015 rolls around, however. "The US will not hand their role to a government, a group of governments, or an inter government group... they are not saying that they'd exclude governments—governments are welcome, all governments are welcome as equal partners with all the other members of our community."

Please click through and read the fucking article before you "parse" the excerpt.

 

[Ulaven_Demorte]

I could watch Vette, Ish, and his spawn getting their asses handed to them all day. But one can only laugh for so long at someone before they start to feel like they're making sport of the mentally handicapped.

 

[kbate]

Excuse me but you forgot to answer her question about what sort of drugs you're on. She has a right to know.

I was out of my mind on Assam when I wrote that post, I apologise for posting while teed off.

 

[eyer]

What a lovely work of complete and utter fiction!

Gash say what?

 

[RobDownSouth]

These people that think the US government are in charge of the internet at the moment are hilarious.

I keep waiting for Grampa Syphillish to drop his patented "Muhaha you fell into my clever trap!" excuse but he seems to genuinely have his man-panties in a collective wad over this nontroversy.

Foreigners are skeery to old men.

 

[Ishmael]

Excuse me but you forgot to answer her question about what sort of drugs you're on. She has a right to know.



Okay, so, you guys are actually just making stuff up. "ICANN hasn't done the best of jobs. To a large degree they're the reason that the web is so 'leaky.' Security has been kept noticeably lax so that the likes of NSA can backdoor it to the extent they do." Lol. Care to elaborate? You obviously have an in-depth understanding.

CERN is near Geneva, too! Maybe we'll give THEM the internet!

Here's a thought: maybe instead of "parsing" a sentence-long news excerpt and using your ace logic skills to reinforce your own opinions, you could like, try and understand what's actually going on? Whatever you seem to think is happening, isn't.



Please click through and read the fucking article before you "parse" the excerpt.

You sure are angry today? PMS?

I don't care what they say sweetie, "If you like your doctor you can keep your doctor." No one in the industry trusts this administration.

Ishmael

 

[RobDownSouth]

You sure are angry today? PMS?

I don't care what they say sweetie, "If you like your doctor you can keep your doctor." No one in the industry trusts this administration.

Grampa Syphillis

Grampa Syphillis simply cannot abide a Negro President.

 

[Disgustipated]

You sure are angry today? PMS?

I don't care what they say sweetie, "If you like your doctor you can keep your doctor." No one in the industry trusts this administration.

Ishmael

You really are a misogynist piece of shit. PMS? Nothing seems angry about her post except for her anger towards your stupidity.

One can only hope your poor granddaughter can escape.

 

[Colonel Hogan]

http://blogs.wsj.com/washwire/2014/03/17/icann-101-who-will-oversee-the-internet/

 

[about_average]

I was out of my mind on Assam when I wrote that post, I apologise for posting while teed off.

It happens.

 

[RobDownSouth]

You really are a misogynist piece of shit. PMS? Nothing seems angry about her post except for her anger towards your stupidity.

One can only hope your poor granddaughter can escape.

Grampa Syphillis simply cannot abide an uppity opinionated woman.

 

[about_average]

Okay, so, you guys are actually just making stuff up. "ICANN hasn't done the best of jobs.

To some extent that's true. People were questioning the legitimacy of ICANN on Slashdot at least 13 years ago.

 

[Ishmael]

http://blogs.wsj.com/washwire/2014/03/17/icann-101-who-will-oversee-the-internet/

I've read the blogs and the tech press, I know what the government is saying and I still have little confidence in their follow through. As this new entity begins to take shape we'll all know a little more. But for the time being I'm going to watch this with a healthy dose of skepticism.

Ishmael

 

[RobDownSouth]

I've read the blogs and the tech press, I know what the government is saying and I still have little confidence in their follow through. As this new entity begins to take shape we'll all know a little more. But for the time being I'm going to watch this with a healthy dose of skepticism.

Grampa Syphillish

Classic Grampa Syphillish doublespeak.

Out of one side of his mouth he's blasting the "weak" government for givin' up Murica's God-given right to control teh Internets to a bunch of swarthy foreigners...

But!

Out of the other side of his mouth he expresses doubt 'n contempt for the government attemptin' to manage teh Internets in the first place!

♫ Who says you can't have it all...♫♫

 

[phrodeau]

http://static4.fjcdn.com/thumbnails/comments/Critical+hit+_de7d81c5cfadac81ad78d57cfa9a3471.gif

Again! Phelia is counting coup today!

That is amazing AND true to life

Your breasts are launching cherry bombs onto Monopoly pieces?

 

[Phelia]

I was out of my mind on Assam when I wrote that post, I apologise for posting while teed off.

I guess that explains why your posts have been in a steep decline as of late. I accept your apology with the hope that CNYCarol's illuminating take on the world will have a positive influence on you.

Gash say what?

Oof, solid burn. U nailed me, bro!

You sure are angry today? PMS?

I don't care what they say sweetie, "If you like your doctor you can keep your doctor." No one in the industry trusts this administration.

Ishmael

No, I am not PMSing, but thank you for asking, sugar plum! I am not due to begin ovulating for about another two weeks, and my mood swings don't manifest as irritability. Everyone is different, you see. In my case, my heart becomes as tender as my swollen breasts (fluid retention) and everything in the world makes me cry. Some months my mood isn't really affected at all, but I am overcome by the urge to fornicate. Oh, and I crave salt. But it's pretty silly to extrapolate a physiological state from your perception of someone's behavior, isn't it? I mean, irritability is also a symptom of constipation. Would it be fair, then, to argue that lit's grouchiest political posters are simply full of shit (medically speaking, of course)?

Anyway since you are so interested, I will happily tell you more about my menstrual cycle! When my womb first starts to shed its endometrial lining, the flow is rather heavy, so even though I much prefer tampons, sometimes I have to double up with a maxi pad (you know, just in case) (of leakage) which is sooooo annoying. Sometimes I experience mild dyspepsia. If you have any other questions, please do not hesitate to ask!

The aggravation you are noticing has nothing to do with my hormones. In fact, I believe it is a natural response to a conversation in which one party seems to be allergic to intellectual honesty, as you have yet to explain how exactly your "skeptical" reading of "the UN will not oversee Icann" led to "the UN is the heir apparent." Unless maybe you took a position based on your own assumptions before actually reading about the issue and are currently trying to hide the fact that you're grasping at straws under a veneer of condescension?

Because following your analogy to its logical equivalence, it would be like if Obama said "if you like your doctor, you can keep your doctor" and then forced every single person in America to change doctors.

Remind me - did that happen? I guess I'm just not part of the unnamed "industry" you mentioned.

To some extent that's true. People were questioning the legitimacy of ICANN on Slashdot at least 13 years ago.

Ah, yes. Back when Iraq had WMDs and the non-Justin-Timberlake members of N'Sync had careers. A magical time indeed.

Your breasts are launching cherry bombs onto Monopoly pieces?

Only when I'm about to get my period (aforementioned fluid retention).

 

[about_average]

Anyway since you are so interested, I will happily tell you more about my menstrual cycle! When my womb first starts to shed its endometrial lining, the flow is rather heavy, so even though I much prefer tampons, sometimes I have to double up with a maxi pad (you know, just in case) (of leakage)

Is that something like the "web [being] so leaky"?

Ah, yes. Back when Iraq had WMDs and the non-Justin-Timberlake members of N'Sync had careers. A magical time indeed.

Well, I didn't follow the WMD issue too much since we gave them to Iraq during the Iran/Iraq war (a fact noticeably missing from CNYCarol's list) so I figured we were cool with them having them in general. And I never did pay any attention to N'Sync though I sorta like Timberlake in some things.
http://youtu.be/ABrSYqiqvzc

 

[unregistered]