I played golf with Private Vasquez

[Purple Haze]

I was drunk, and she won.

Nice outfit,

 

[Private Vasquez]

That lucky birdie on the 16th was helpful.

 

[Rubyfruit]

You slut, PV.

How many times did you promise me that I was the only one you'd birdie with? How many?

I couldn't trust you alone with GI Joe, and now this.

I'm sick.

 

[Laurel]

I like birdies. They so pwetty.

 

[Private Vasquez]

I'm saving all my eagles for you, Ruby.

Don't be sick...it's no fun to clean up.

 

[metal_minx]

pv...your plastic tatas are just hangin out

 

[Private Vasquez]

They don't actually do a lot of hanging..they're much too firm for that. I think the photographer snapped this when I wasn't looking.

 

[metal_minx]

how can you see through those glasses anyway?

 

[Private Vasquez]

They only look dark from the outstide. They're perfectly see-throughable.

 

[Mischka]

Anyone interested in playing a round with me? I'm all dressed up and ready to go.

 

[metal_minx]

They only look dark from the outstide. They're perfectly see-throughable.

they look like they have foil on the lenses...funny

 

[Rubyfruit]

Mischka, I think we could have some fun with your trophy.

 

[Shaq]

I was a caddy...and I got my fee in postage stamps...good deal...they have skyrocketed to 37 cents each...how does the government expect my kids to eat!?

 

[Private Vasquez]

Annika and that 'trophy' would kick my plastic butt all up and down the course.

Sure, I'll play.

 

[Mischka]

Mischka, I think we could have some fun with your trophy.

Why, the idea had never even crossed my mind.

*bats eyelashes innocently*

 

[metal_minx]

can i carry the trophy around until someone wins?

 

[phrodeau]

I suppose everyone else has seen Private Vasquez's film work, but this was new to me.

Les Pantless Menace

 

[Private Vasquez]

I did that in younger, poorer days. Performance art at it's finest.

Bravo!!

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Did you get a "hole in one"? *wink, wink, nudge, nudge*

No, seriously, did you fuck her?

 

[Private Vasquez]

There's no fucking in golf. The divets are too large to replace.

 

[desert spike]

There's no fucking in golf. The divets are too large to replace.

Is that rule similar to " there's no crying in baseball"

I say why the hell not!! Give the grounds keeper something to do.

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

All that grass, and no frollicking? What kind of fuckig sport is this?

 

[tortoise]

Do you have a cold?

 

[Private Vasquez]

You can't take a drop from a fucking divet. It is your responsibility to hit your ball from that divet. Not an easy task considering the shape and depth.

 

[Mischka]

There's no fucking in golf.

Um, there can be. At the eighteenth hole. Right next to the landscape bushes.

Isn't that why the grass is that cushy?