I feel nauseous...

[*bratcat*]

 

[Cibo]

/e gives you a great big hug

 

[Freya]

Having never been married, I'm in no position to offer advice. However, I do have a relatively empty PM box if you need anything.

 

[cybergirly]

*hugs* bratcat.

You have to do what is right for you.

 

[*bratcat*]

 

[Ladyhawke]

*Hugs* I can understand....

 

[April]

It's no good for your kids to live in a house with that kind of unhapiness and tension. Not to mention no good for you.

Your husband sounds very controlling and a little hostile from things you've said. This is probably the best thing for all of you.

 

[Nora]

Brat, I don't have any wise words for you. It sounds like y'all are handling it in as good a manner as you possibly can. I think it's probaby going to be bad 'til it's finally over. The dissolution of a marriage isn't supposed to be easy, in a way, ya know?

Just keep your eyes on the prize. Make a list (quietly, on the 'puter...no need to rub it in, ya know?) of all the things that you're going to do when it's done. The reasons you're doing it. When it gets hard, just re-read your list.

Ok, it's a geeky suggestion, but it might help a li'l. *hugs*

 

[lavender]

 

[freakygirl]

You are right where I was 9 years ago..

I don't have any wise words.. Just remember it does get better.

PM me if you need to talk.

 

[HeavyStick]

Best of Luck.

 

[Guest]

Huggggggggs bratcat

 

[Cheyenne]

I have no idea where I am going to live...we have agreed to no concrete "kid" terms...they go where they wish...whenever they wish.

I have no personal experience with divorce, but have spent a lot of time watching a loved one go through it.

Unless Canada is much different than the U.S. I don't think your kids freedom idea will fly with the court. Someone has to have legal and financial responsibility for them, and the kids deserve some stability in their lives knowing where they belong. I wouldn't make them choose between parents, either. That isn't fair to them. Not to mention it just sets you and your husband up for a popularity contest to see who can get the kids to love them more.

By the way, I wouldn't wish divorce on my worst enemy. I hope things go as well for you as you hope.

 

[lilminx]

Good for you for finally having the strength and the courage to walk away. Best of luck to you and your family.

 

[I'mVan]

Brat, my friend, I love you. I'm so glad to see that there are only 5 frogs on the lilly pads.

*muah*

 

[*bratcat*]

 

[greybeard]

freakygurl said it............

I think the most important thing to hang on to is that it does get better...........my own divorce situation was very different......we had no children and were both very grown up about it all, but we knew it was the thing to do and we both just focused on the future...........the best to you, and know that there are a lot of friends here to lean on................

greybeard

 

[Mischka]

We have a lawyer going over the fine details for us.

Again with the American perspective, but using only one lawyer may be tricky. If push comes to shove, the lawyer has to choose only one side (usually the first party that came to him/her).

Brat, I wish you the best.

 

[Guest]

waaaa waaa waaa.

sucks when the chickens come home to roost

 

[Bluesboy2]

You have a PM

You know how to reach me and I am there for you.

 

[sexy-girl]

im sorry bratcat

my mother and dad split up just over a year ago now i guess and it was extremely hard it felt like a bomb going off through our lives but i can honestly say things are better now for me for my mother and my dad


i know its going to be tough and it will get harder before it gets better but i hope it gets better for you like it did for us here

 

[kiwiwolf]

All the best my friend.

Shane

 

[SkyBluAngelEyes]

Bratcat...

You and I have never exchanged words on this board before... I know exactly how you feel though.

I remember the scared part. So scared that I thought I'd die before I could get out. Fortunately for me, getting out was more important than staying.

Please remember your children in all of this. They are what matter most, and are your priority. Please don't make them pawns in a cruel game between you and your spouse. My ex thought he could buy the love our daughter and that turned out horribly bad for him. It's not easy, but doable.

Good Luck!

 

[Angel]

Re: Re: I feel nauseous...

I wouldn't make them choose between parents, either. That isn't fair to them. Not to mention it just sets you and your husband up for a popularity contest to see who can get the kids to love them more.

I beg to differ. As a divorced kid, I was given the choice at a very young age, and I'm very glad I was the one to make that decision, not some judge who didn't know me.

I had a court appointed "lawyer" of my own, seperate from my parents who spoke to me outside of court and spoke for me inside.

My decision of course, wasn't the final word, and my final placement with my mom was determined by quite a few issues, but I was heard in court and it had some bearing on the situation.

 

[Guest]

and of course you'd have to be contrary wouldn't you?