I did meself a mischief!

[Jada59]

This was one of my favorite lines from Mr. Humphries on that old Britcom, "Are You Being Served?"

Actually I think he said that he nearly did that.

Here's what I did! I was using a grater to thinly slice potatoes. I had to press so hard on the top of it that my left hand went numb. The sensations are starting to come back now. But to make matters worse, I slept weirdly on my right hand so it's partly numb. Gah!

What silly thing or things did you do recently?

 

[XBeautifulSoulX]

Shampooed twice stupid bottles look the same without my glasses

 

[Jada59]

Shampooed twice stupid bottles look the same without my glasses

Heh. I've done that before!

 

[kurrginatorX]

Walked around looking for my glasses and they were on top of my head. Couldn't find my car keys. After 30 minutes I looked in the one place I hadn't yet, the freezer, and sure enough there they were. I could go on and on with this one./

I love the title of this thread, BTW

 

[Jada59]

Walked around looking for my glasses and they were on top of my head. Couldn't find my car keys. After 30 minutes I looked in the one place I hadn't yet, the freezer, and sure enough there they were. I could go on and on with this one./

I love the title of this thread, BTW

Hehe! My mom once put her glasses in the butter compartment of the fridge!

 

[lovetopleasewomen]

This last kitchen we installed, every frikken day I cut or slashed myself somewhere on my body & drew blood each time.

 

[Jada59]

This last kitchen we installed, every frikken day I cut or slashed myself somewhere on my body & drew blood each time.

Yow!

 

[Jada59]

I was working in my bathroom just now. I have a long handled dustpan in there that is missing the plastic piece at the top. It's a cheapie that I use for sweeping stray cat litter into.

I am wearing a long, stretchy dress that has deep slits at the side. As I attempted to walk around the dustpan that I foolishly left in the middle of the floor, I managed to tip it over with my foot (I think). It all happened so fast. It went down, then up into my dress. The top of the handle shot right up inside of my lady bits. I wasn't sure whether to be alarmed, aroused, or laugh. I considered hollering for my gardener to assist me!

I actually had to lean sideways and stand on my toes of my left foot to pull it out of me.

Ha! I could not do that on purpose if I tried!

 

[kurrginatorX]

I was working in my bathroom just now. I have a long handled dustpan in there that is missing the plastic piece at the top. It's a cheapie that I use for sweeping stray cat litter into.

I am wearing a long, stretchy dress that has deep slits at the side. As I attempted to walk around the dustpan that I foolishly left in the middle of the floor, I managed to tip it over with my foot (I think). It all happened so fast. It went down, then up into my dress. The top of the handle shot right up inside of my lady bits. I wasn't sure whether to be alarmed, aroused, or laugh. I considered hollering for my gardener to assist me!

I actually had to lean sideways and stand on my toes of my left foot to pull it out of me.

Ha! I could not do that on purpose if I tried!

Mmmmm. The possibilities are endless with that one.

 

[Jada59]

Mmmmm. The possibilities are endless with that one.

Hehehe. Yeah. Never a dull moment here!

 

[Smoothshavendad]

Hehehe. Yeah. Never a dull moment here!

Slept weirdly on your hand? Is that code for masturbated all night

 

[Gamine67]

Washing my hands in the bathroom I blindly pumped liquid soap in to them only to find I started washing with shea butter lotion.

 

[Jada59]

Slept weirdly on your hand? Is that code for masturbated all night

Ha! That's funny!

 

[Jada59]

Washing my hands in the bathroom I blindly pumped liquid soap in to them only to find I started washing with shea butter lotion.

I've done similar. When I was a kid, my mom had some kind of egg shampoo in a tube for some scalp condition. She sent me into her bathroom to brush my teeth. I thought it was a new kind of toothpaste. Eek!

 

[ef_oh_ex]

I was working in my bathroom just now. I have a long handled dustpan in there that is missing the plastic piece at the top. It's a cheapie that I use for sweeping stray cat litter into.

I am wearing a long, stretchy dress that has deep slits at the side. As I attempted to walk around the dustpan that I foolishly left in the middle of the floor, I managed to tip it over with my foot (I think). It all happened so fast. It went down, then up into my dress. The top of the handle shot right up inside of my lady bits. I wasn't sure whether to be alarmed, aroused, or laugh. I considered hollering for my gardener to assist me!

I actually had to lean sideways and stand on my toes of my left foot to pull it out of me.

Ha! I could not do that on purpose if I tried!

a video of that event would go viral in a heartbeat LOL!
(and would be almost impossible to *reproduce* haha)

 

[Jada59]

a video of that event would go viral in a heartbeat LOL!
(and would be almost impossible to *reproduce* haha)

I know. I did think of that!

 

[Jada59]

My cat is sick. She was sleeping smack in the middle of my bed. My other cat was on the bed too as well as my gardener's dog. I laid down with them but had to contort my body around them and had my bed towards the foot of the bed. My legs were pushed up against a chest of drawers.

I guess I nodded off for a bit. Woke up not realizing the weird position I was in and would up flailing my legs smack into the chest of drawers while the rest of me sort of dropped off sideways. None of the littles woke up. But... Ow!

 

[Jada59]

Did you do something stupid today? I did!

At the start of this pandemic, someone stole toilet paper and laundry soap from my garage. I used to keep the canned food out there but was able to clean out a closet in the house to put it in. But...

My gardener was worried that whoever stole the other things, might come back for food. He had a habit of leaving the garage door open so many people knew that I had stored food there. So... He took some back to his place and his storage unit. I put some in my bedroom closet.

I decided that the food in my closet is no longer needed so was going through it to move some stuff to the pantry cupboard.

I had 2, 4 packs of canned chicken. One slipped out of my hand and fell on the floor. I was splattered with something wet. Ugh!

I could see wetness on the floor.

I ran the chicken to the kitchen expecting a busted can. But no. All was intact!

I went back. Checked the tomato juice. The chicken broth. All intact. Then I saw something blue on the floor. It was a curved bottle of some off brand "lite lubricant". It was cracked open. On top of it was one of the two useless attachments for my Hitachi that I could swear I threw out years ago. Must have bought the lube years ago too. I don't remember buying it.

I cleaned up the floor as best I could (carpet) then set about looking for the other attachment. There it was in a tote bag.

So... How was your day?

 

[expat_james]

This is a fun thread. If I screw up, I'll post.

 

[Jada59]

Washing my hands in the bathroom I blindly pumped liquid soap in to them only to find I started washing with shea butter lotion.

Hehe. The other day I almost put toothpaste on my arm. The coconut cream and the toothpaste tubes look similar.

 

[Sweet_Lara]

I have developed a horrible habit of making stove top popcorn nearly every day.

The other night I had the kernels measured out in a cup waiting for the oil to heat up. Welll, it did and before I realized it I had poured nearly the entire jar of kernels into the oil, instead of the measured-out ones.

I pictured the roof of the house slowly raising upward as popped corn tumbled from the rafters. I took the pan off the heat and tried scooping everything out but have since thrown it all out. Bad habit gone.

 

[Cabooseluvr]

Popcorn hacks

Throw in one kennel into the oil... as soon as that one pops toss the rest in...
OR
Add one teaspoon of Tabasco to the oil and do the same thing mentioned above... pop open a can of Coca Cola and enjoy something different tonight!

I have developed a horrible habit of making stove top popcorn nearly every day.

The other night I had the kernels measured out in a cup waiting for the oil to heat up. Welll, it did and before I realized it I had poured nearly the entire jar of kernels into the oil, instead of the measured-out ones.

I pictured the roof of the house slowly raising upward as popped corn tumbled from the rafters. I took the pan off the heat and tried scooping everything out but have since thrown it all out. Bad habit gone.

 

[Lady2020]

Thought a tube of handcream was toothpaste.

 

[Jada59]

Throw in one kennel into the oil... as soon as that one pops toss the rest in...
OR
Add one teaspoon of Tabasco to the oil and do the same thing mentioned above... pop open a can of Coca Cola and enjoy something different tonight!

And don't put your face over the pan. I've been hit in the eye a few times by a hot kernel.

 

[Unquoted]

This morning I decided to make oatmeal cookies for breakfast. Mixed up the batter with no problem. Divided said batter on to 2 cookie sheets
without mishap. Put the first batch in the oven, set the oven timer, and picked up a book to read while waiting. 15 minutes later it was time
to take out the first batch and put in the second batch. Now the trouble begins. I forgot to turn the oven on. Turned oven on, set timer, and waited
another 15 minutes. Grabbed potholder with left hand, opened oven door, reached in with unprotected right hand and grabbed cookie sheet.
After changing hands and reciting close to 1/3 of the profanity I know, I got the second batch in the oven.
1 hour & 1 injury after starting this whole mess, I had cookies for breakfast. Tomorrow it will be cold cereal or something else safe.