I’ve been caught masturbating by …

Just now I found myself alone for awhile. I thought I'd do some edging while wearing some of my wife's clothes. I looked in our hamper and found the baby doll she wore last weekend when we fooled around. I put that on and went downstairs to grab her boots out of the closet. Just as I was walking over to sit down to put them on, my son pulled in the driveway. I ducked down, then ran, threw the boots back in the closet, ran upstairs and changed.
There's a 99.9999% chance he didn't see me. I hope to God he didn't!!
But that would NOT have been good.
 
My ex future mother-in-law dropping by to tell me the flowers had been taken care of for the wedding, while I was fucking myself hard with my dildo in 3 different positions, out by the pool with absolutely no knowledge of her watching, before I stood up licking my toy, turning to head inside, and she was standing there.

I just wanted to die.

Her daughter and I never got married.

I fuck up everything.
 
Mom walked in on me right at launch. Thought her and dad were asleep. It was about midnight and I swore I locked my bedroom door. She never walked in on me again that's for damn sure.
 
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