Hysterectomy

[modest mouse]

This morning I learned that my mother will have to undergo one after a battery of tests she had this past week. I will not have a chance to talk with her about it until tomorrow afternoon but in the meantime I'm trying to learn more about the procedure and the after care, etc.

The medical information is readily available and actually easily digestable.

My question is, what can I do to make this ordeal somewhat more tolerable for her. If anyone has undergone the procedure, or a spouse/family member has.... I'd appreciate some info regarding the feelings and repercussions. How it was dealt with, that type of thing.

My mother and I rarely see eye to eye but this one is throwing me for a loop.

Thanks in advance.
If you wish for discretion please feel free to utilize me Email(preferred over PM.)

 

[MissTaken]

She will need lots of TLC, emotionally as well as physically.

Facing a histerectomy, regardless of your desire not to have anymore children, still brings upon a feeling of finality. The decision is out of her hands. There is a definite feeling of loss.

Also, she is likely to have hormonal imbalances. Patience with mood swings and crying jags is a must. It is menopause or comparable to menopause.

Kid gloves, MM.

Best wishes.

 

[modest mouse]

Miss T, thank you.

She only lives about a half hour drive away so its easy enough for me to work around my schedule and see her as often as possible, for whatever she might need.

 

[MissTaken]

Well, it is major surgery.

IF someone can make up some quick meals that she can microwave, make sure she has a comfie place where she can spend about a week on her back and help her to be able to do as little as possible, that would be good.

Some casseroles in the freezer are always nice.

But I am a lousy cook, so don't ask me! hehe

 

[Ishmael]

My mother went through this. It's instant menopause.

It will require a great deal of patience until the hormone replacement regimen is balanced out.

My mother occasionally forgot to take her prescription and we could all tell. We'd gently remind her to take her pills, then we'd lay low until they kicked in.

Not all women react the same, but in that there will be no pre-menopausal break-in period, I would recommend that you prepare for the worst as far as mood swings, etc. Then hope for the best.


Ishmael

 

[Cheyenne]

Does she have a computer? Here's a site with great information and discussion groups. Getting her in touch with other women who have gone through the same thing would be a nice thing to do for her. Support groups can sometimes answer all those "am I normal?" questions.


http://www.families-first.com/womenshealth/tah.htm

And Ishmael is correct, if it is a full hysterectomy, she will be in instant menopause. The site above has a great discussion list/support group for menopause and peri-menopause, too.

 

[modest mouse]

Miss T, the meals are an excellent idea. She'll just have to choke down my less than stellar cooking.

Ishmael, thanks for the post. There is a multitude of information out there but I wanted to hear some 'real' stuff.

Chey, She doesnt have her own internet access but I can provide info for her. I hesitated to get into one of the support group circles because I find that culture can bring out my cynicism and prove counterproductive. I'll check out the link though.

Thanks to those who sent Email as well.

 

[Cheyenne]

Chey, She doesnt have her own internet access but I can provide info for her. I hesitated to get into one of the support group circles because I find that culture can bring out my cynicism and prove counterproductive. I'll check out the link though.

The support group online though is more a place for questions and answers. Women send in questions, many of which have the unspoken "so am I normal?" question at the end of them. Sometimes another member will answer with their experience. Sometimes a moderator of the list will answer.

The digest versions are great since they come once a day with 5 to 25 messages pulled together. Otherwise your mailbox fills with the individual messages which can drive you crazy.

 

[modest mouse]

Ok, thanks for the clarification. It may prove a valuable resource.

 

[BlondGirl]

Before assuming that she will be "instantly thrust into menopause", learn if she has already gone through menopause. I would guess that since you are an adult that your mother is already at the age where menopause and possible HRT are issues for her or have already been dealt with. (Not everyone elects to take HRT--currently, I doubt that I would and if I did, there would be only one or two synthetic drugs that I would consider--never the "natural sources".)

One thing about a hysterectomy is that it is such a common surgery that she is bound to have plenty of friends who have been-there-done-that. (Some estimates state that 1 out of every 3 women have this surgery.)

Don't worry too much about getting lots of information- be more concerned about being patiently supportive.

 

[Leg Up]

Whoa, whoa, whoa...

Geez...a hysterectomy isn't a death sentence. If they leave her ovaries (which they will unless they are involved, i.e., cancer) she may need little or no HRT. I had one at 28 and never looked back!! Became a sports car instead of the family sedan <big happy smile>. And while it can often throw a woman into premature menopause, not necessarily...I'm living, breathing proof of that! It did nothing except possibly increase my desires and sexuality...

How much discomfort she will have is also dependent on how they remove it... But, probably the biggest thing is to offer support during the post operative period. She'll be tired and wrung out from the anesthesia probably more than anything...it takes a few days to get that stuff out of your system. Ugh.