How to? (or Who to?)

[ShyOlderGuy]

Before a bunch of volunteers flood this with offers and pics, please note...this is much MORE than a request for volunteers.

After 28 years of marriage, my wife has finally agreed to having another partner join us. Her first preference would be a male, but she is also curious about females. It would be up to her and her partner whether I would join in or not...that's fine with me (although she DEFINITELY likes the idea of being eaten during intercourse, so it would probably grow into a threesome).

So here's where I need the help from those of you that have been there. My main interest is her pleasure, happiness, and safety. Do I start soliciting my friends? I know there are MANY thousands of guys that would jump at the chance...how do I keep it discrete, clean, and safe (without reducing the eroticism and thrill for her)?

Thanks in advance for your help!

 

[ShyOlderGuy]

If it matters....this is the WHO I'm trying to please....

 

[jpschust]

I know I'm somewhjat young but I've dealt with this before with many friends. First off, beware, if you don't really sit and talk through things it could really potentially damage your marraige. I've seen it hurt some relationships that I thought were pretty stable.

That being said, (and that was not an argument against your decision in any way, just a word of caution) I think you and your wife need to sit down and talk about exactly what the third person's role would be in the bedroom as well as what your limits are. That being said just begin to contact others or let them contact you and maintain a friendship for a while and see how things go. Trust your instincts, they are generally right.

 

[Rock n Scissors]

Shyoldguy,

With as long as you've been together with your wife, I would assume you two share a deep love and commitment to each other. I wouldn't worry to much about the "after", and don't be overly concerned with worrying.

That's not to say that things shouldn't be considered and given thought to, but I've known plenty of couples that were interested in trying this, and never did because of fear or the unknown.

The simple fact is this, having another sexual partner isn't going to make you love your wife less or vice-versa. It's something you both are interested and feel you might do only because of how strong your relationship with her is.

I've been there, I am married and my wife has brought female partners into our sex life. Everytime it was one of her friends, and someone she chose. She'd be mildly suspicious if I started pushing her for a specific girl or brought one home myself, that wouldn't fly. It's got to be her doing the picking.

Having the third be a friend has the advantage of not having to worry as much about an STD or something worse, in most cases you can feel pretty confident with an honest friend. For alot of people, this issue prevents them from seeking strangers.

Another advantage I've found by having it be a friend is that it can be kept private and descreit, and it's alot easier to approach the subject than having to try and go out and pick up some stranger.

Sex with two women at one time is so good, I wouldn't mind having two wives at all. I say go for it, and let us know how things turn out.

RNS

 

[jpschust]

this is how you can tell im young

two wives? jesus, immagine the f'in pillow talk

 

[ShyOlderGuy]

Thanks JP and RNS!


Sounds like good advice. I agree, RNS, that the relationship is pretty stable.

We're probably talking a second male here, at least to start with. I'm just not sure about walking up to one of my friends, and saying "By the way, I'd like you to fuck my wife"....I guess I just need to get over it, and do just that!

 

[ShyOlderGuy]

Anybody else?

Anybody else with experiences (good or bad)? or advice? Like on how to approach somebody on this?