How To Marry Your Pastor in 3 easy steps

[bg23]

1. Tell him you would like to bear his child

2. He will decide to do some laps. Wait patiently.

3. Accept his proposal and get married 8 days later.

Fifty Shades of Biblecamp!

http://www.amazon.com/Created-Be-Hi...?ie=UTF8&filterBy=addOneStar&showViewpoints=0

 

[Sinny]

Good god.
Add "gab" to the list of words that should be nuked from all vocabulary everywhere forever.

 

[Johnny_Ray_Wilson]

What if he is a she? ...

 

[Instant_Star]

And I thought 50 shades was the bottom of the barrel.

 

[Johnny_Ray_Wilson]

And I thought 50 shades was the bottom of the barrel.

I really need to read that.

No priests in it?

 

[bg23]

oh. I should mention, this is a self help book, not porn!

Some helpful tips for being a good wife:

"You are created to be "a helper suited to the needs of a man. This is how God created you and it is your purpose for existing....You are created to make him complete, not to seek personal fulfillment parallel to him."

"You cannot command your husband to love you, and you have no right to expect him to love you when you are unlovely."

take note, ladies.

"You can freely call your husband "lord" when you know that you are addressing the one who put him in charge and asked you to suffer at your husbands hands just as the Lord suffered at the hands of unjust authorities."

"The chain of authority must never be broken, even if it means allowing some abuse (of the husband's role)."

"first know that a husband has authority to tell his wife what to wear, where to go, whom to talk to, how to spend her time, when to speak or not to, even if he is unreasonable and insensitive."

 

[Instant_Star]

oh. I should mention, this is a self help book, not porn!

Some helpful tips for being a good wife:

"You are created to be "a helper suited to the needs of a man. This is how God created you and it is your purpose for existing....You are created to make him complete, not to seek personal fulfillment parallel to him."

"You cannot command your husband to love you, and you have no right to expect him to love you when you are unlovely."

take note, ladies.

"You can freely call your husband "lord" when you know that you are addressing the one who put him in charge and asked you to suffer at your husbands hands just as the Lord suffered at the hands of unjust authorities."

"The chain of authority must never be broken, even if it means allowing some abuse (of the husband's role)."

"first know that a husband has authority to tell his wife what to wear, where to go, whom to talk to, how to spend her time, when to speak or not to, even if he is unreasonable and insensitive."

I think I just lost faith in humanity.

 

[artemesia_g]

"You can freely call your husband "lord" when you know that you are addressing the one who put him in charge and asked you to suffer at your husbands hands just as the Lord suffered at the hands of unjust authorities."

"The chain of authority must never be broken, even if it means allowing some abuse (of the husband's role)."

That's....kind of hot.

 

[bg23]

it's a pretty racy read though!

WIFE: "What can I do to help you, Adam?"

HUSBAND: "Pick up the other end of that log, and help me move it over here."

W: "What should my next project be, Adam?"

H: "Have my dinner ready every evening, and take good care of my little ones."

W: "That is a very strong fence you are building, and the gate looks nice. I am so proud of you, Adam. What would you like now?"

H: "Take your clothes off real slow so I can watch...Yeah, you're a fine help meet."

 

[bg23]

here's a fun review:

Debi Pearl states that if your husband molests your children, you should call the authorities and "have him do" time in prison. Then, when he gets out, you should welcome him home with loving arms. Because "God hates divorce without exception."

Let me get this straight. If I'm married to a man who HAS SEX with his own children, not only am I NOT to divorce him, I'm supposed to welcome him back as my husband?? Have sex with him as my husband?? That is sick. What kind of woman in her right mind could have sex with a man who screws children?

Not to mention such a woman would deserve to be disowned by her own children. Can you imagine being a child molested by your father and then have your mother welcome him home? That is a slap in the face to all abused children.

Do we really have to go on about all the other wrong points in this book? That's enough for me!

 

[Johnny_Ray_Wilson]

I am still curious as to whether 'he' is a 'she'?

I have a good reason for this question based upon personal experience. And this she priest got drunk.

 

[Sinny]

I can't believe you gals didn't know all that stuff. It's how you keep a man. Also, good gab skills are a must.

 

[JustSkye]

There is no way in hell. Nope. Zip. Fuck that.

 

[gravyrug]

I am still curious as to whether 'he' is a 'she'?

I have a good reason for this question based upon personal experience. And this she priest got drunk.

In the world the author lives in, woman can't possibly be priests. Only men can understand the will of God, which is why wives have to do whatever their husbands say, no matter how awful it seems. I've seen that world, and ran from it.

 

[Instant_Star]

I'm still trying to wrap my head around the fact that this is a self help book.

 

[artemesia_g]

I can't believe you gals didn't know all that stuff. It's how you keep a man. Also, good gab skills are a must.

And swallowing.

 

[Sinny]

And swallowing.

Yes, the submissive gab gals training camp was very explicit about that rule.

you bad.

 

[Johnny_Ray_Wilson]

I can't believe you gals didn't know all that stuff. It's how you keep a man. Also, good gab skills are a must.

Uhm.......no. Not this time. More often than not - us men are deft.

In the world the author lives in, woman can't possibly be priests. Only men can understand the will of God, which is why wives have to do whatever their husbands say, no matter how awful it seems. I've seen that world, and ran from it.

Okay. I understand that train of thought. It harkens to the core of my upbringing. Mostly, I agree. However, the will of God is not limited to men. The bible I read, before modern changes and wrongful interpretations, actually disagrees with men degrading or dismissing women as less than they (men) are.

 

[zipman]

There is no way in hell. Nope. Zip. Fuck that.

I think inserting my name in the middle of your post was a freudian slip meaning you would like to be that kind of woman for me.

I'll be back after taking 3 laps around my laptop.

 

[zipman]

Okay I'm back.

 

[Johnny_Ray_Wilson]

Okay I'm back.

You spelled troll wrong.

 

[rosco rathbone]

http://www.christiandomesticdiscipline.com/