How often guys ... ya know ... get off?

[molonel]

Okay, this is a question for guys (directly) and women (experiences with men).

As a guy, how often do you cum? Or if you're a woman, how often do your partners? Every time? Every other time? Not every time? Only during sex, but not blowjobs? Both of those, but not handjobs? All of the above? How often?

The reason I ask is because it's not at all uncommon for me to blow my load once, maybe twice a day. But when I'm using a condom, it's not unusual for me not to reach climax at all. I've never had anyone complain. After all, I can go a long time, sometimes. It's also unusual for me during a blowjob.

But sometimes women are bothered by the fact that I didn't ... get there. As if it reflects somehow on their performance. Which it doesn't.

Also, a second question for women: does it bother you if a guy doesn't cum?

 

[loulou34]

It does bother me when a man does not cum, because I do feel as if it reflects my performance.

 

[Gamelover221]

To answer your question, I get off once or twice a day.

It's not uncommon to have trouble reaching climax with a condom on. Physically speaking there's only two sensations involved in sex...friction and pressure. When you wear a condom it eliminates the friction and depending on how tight and talented your partner is with working her muscles, you may or may not get enough sensation to orgasim.

If you want to get off with your partner more I suggest masturbating less so you will be more sensitive.

 

[Eilan]

Every time? Every other time? Not every time? Only during sex, but not blowjobs? Both of those, but not handjobs? All of the above? How often?

My husband cums every time we have sex, and we have sex at the very least three times a week, usually much more than that. It's not out of the ordinary for him to cum 3-4 times (he's 48, BTW) during the right situation. If I'm giving him a blow job, he'll cum, unless we're using oral as foreplay. We don't do handjobs (other than his masturbating, obviously) very often.

The reason I ask is because it's not at all uncommon for me to blow my load once, maybe twice a day. But when I'm using a condom, it's not unusual for me not to reach climax at all. I've never had anyone complain. After all, I can go a long time, sometimes. It's also unusual for me during a blowjob.

The condom/blow job issues are pretty common, from what I've heard. For us, condom usage isn't an issue, as I've had a tubal, though we've used them in the past with no problems. Your mileage, of course, may vary.

But sometimes women are bothered by the fact that I didn't ... get there. As if it reflects somehow on their performance. Which it doesn't.

It's your partners' issue, not yours. I think that both partners should try not to get hung up on issues like this, but it's easier said than done.

Also, a second question for women: does it bother you if a guy doesn't cum?

It depends. It's not an issue for my hubby and me.

However, I once had a partner who was on antidepressants (not sure what). He had no trouble getting aroused, but he did have trouble having an orgasm. It wasn't impossible for him, just more difficult. Unfortunately, he didn't communicate this to me until I was raw. Once he gave me some input as to how I could "help" him, things were fine, but I wish he'd told me beforehand.

 

[ApplesMcgee]

.....

 

[GEKKEN_]

It does bother me when a man does not cum, because I do feel as if it reflects my performance.

Damn straight!

 

[Zephreck]

Well for me..

Okay, this is a question for guys (directly) and women (experiences with men).

As a guy, how often do you cum? Or if you're a woman, how often do your partners? Every time? Every other time? Not every time? Only during sex, but not blowjobs? Both of those, but not handjobs? All of the above? How often?

The reason I ask is because it's not at all uncommon for me to blow my load once, maybe twice a day. But when I'm using a condom, it's not unusual for me not to reach climax at all. I've never had anyone complain. After all, I can go a long time, sometimes. It's also unusual for me during a blowjob.

But sometimes women are bothered by the fact that I didn't ... get there. As if it reflects somehow on their performance. Which it doesn't.

Also, a second question for women: does it bother you if a guy doesn't cum?

Depends on the day and the situation. Typically when with a woman 3 to 5 times a night. Assuming she is interested. Most of the women I date have high sex drives. When not with a woman 2-3 times typically most evenings.

As to how long etc.. alot of that depends on how aroused I am and what my lover is doing. Sometimes receiving oral for me is so intense that it can take me a very long time. Other times it is done a certain way and doesn't take long at all.

Really just situational. As for condoms may want to try several different positions. Sometimes you can find a certain one that applies more pressure and thus can help lead you to orgasm. For me this would be doggie style. Everyone is different though. And also you may need to open up a bit and have the lady you are with do some things that arouse you when you are getting close. It may be biting your chest, raking your back with her nails, whispering or shouting things at you if you prefer louder women.. many things. Sex doesn't just start in the mind for women it also starts there for men..

 

[brighteyed]

opps.

 

[brighteyed]

I've only experienced having a guy not cum during a sexual session a few times and I always worry a lot afterwards about why. Though, there are times where my partner and I will be going for another round and perhaps he won't come for the second/third/whatever time and I'm alright with that.

sidenote:

have the lady you are with do some things that arouse you when you are getting close. It may be biting your chest, raking your back with her nails, whispering or shouting things at you if you prefer louder women.. many things.

My current SO loves shoulder biting.

 

[barnett25]

I almost always cum with my girlfriend, but when I don't it's because I'm wearing a condom. I have never cum from oral however.

 

[ozbloke1980]

I've cum all but once when having sex.

 

[Fox]

I've cum all but one of the times during sex, and pretty much all of the times when it wasn't sex with a partner. I think the failed times by myself were all overtired/sick circumstances. As for solo, I think the best I've managed was six times, but at the end, it was pretty pathetic and I was pretty sensitive.

My current SO loves shoulder biting.

And consequently, someone like me has to come along and sigh thinking wistfully that I love having my shoulders bitten by my wife. Any ideas on how to get her to do it more often?

Cheers!

 

[lloyd369]

Any ideas on how to get her to do it more often?

Put food on them

 

[FurryFury]

Last question first: YES it bothers me if a guy doesn't come! Very much! It does make me feel like I didn't do my job and make him happy. When he does come it feels very much like my climax. I LOVE to feel that!!! Frankly you'd have to really do something to make me stop until ya did come.

*smiles sweetly*

My partner comes nearly every time. Let's say 98-99% of the time. That makes me happy. Just like a guy should want the girl to come? I feel that same way about a guy. I even like him to come first but he usually doesn't.

The few times he hasn't has been from overtired/sick circumstances. *nods to smart posters above* Yep.

We have rarely used condoms which I hate because I love skin and we are in a long term committed relationship.

Many men do not easily come by blow job. It's fun regardless.

Now my guy? He usually comes at least once a day. Often without me. Our schedules are not perfectly meshed so it's not always possible to be together.

Fury

 

[brighteyed]

And consequently, someone like me has to come along and sigh thinking wistfully that I love having my shoulders bitten by my wife. Any ideas on how to get her to do it more often?

You should tell her. Or, if you don't feel comfortable doing that (why wouldn't you?) maybe you should nibble on her more often and she might get the message. With things like that during sex people will often do what they would like to have done to them. I didn't pick up on biting my SO until he really had done it to me a few times. I realized that he must like it.

 

[brighteyed]

Put food on them

*mental image of fruit rollup shoulder pads*