How does an aspiring writer deal with negative comments for cuckold stories

[Djmac1031]

My take? Publish to LW with the expectation of being pummeled by creeps and lowlifes. As the others have mentioned, there are constructive comments, kernels of learning amid the chaff.

Above all, do not take any of the comments personally. "They" don't know you and never will, so how can it be personal?

I don't delete the idiot comments as it is my belief that the (lack of) quality of the comment and person making them is self-evident. Also, you may trip over the bad of the bad, somebody who takes offense at their input being "censored" and decide to mess with you in revenge especially if there is a scoring system involved. I have personally experienced this on other forums, so it does happen.

Yeah I agree, I think it's a huge mistake to engage them in comments...what's that saying? Oh yeah: DON'T FEED THE TROLLS

I've pretty much ignored all but one negative comment and only to point out that what he claimed didn't happen but should have in my story absolutely happened and he just didn't actually read the damn thing.

But otherwise I'm not interested in debating them.

 

[windar]

Now I just noticed that a number of you have commented on "Dear Steve:" Thanks for taking the time to do so. I did purposely leave ambiguous why Dave wasn't paying much attention to his wife (work or something on the side?) and whether or not Dave sent the letter or in fact whether the whole thing was just a fantasy on his part over a woman that he merely chatted with at the dog park.

But comments like "She's a whore" or "He's a scumbag" are not anything I should take personally, since they are not me. Believe me I've created much more evil and interesting characters than the ones in this story including murderers, slave traders, corrupt politicians, pirates and even borrowed a few from real history, like Nazi war criminals.

So I really do believe that the comments regarding characters in stories are not anything the writer should consider as directed at them. This is fiction after all.

 

[Lifestyle66]

It seems to me that the first 2 are directed at the characters in the story, not the author, which is a BIG difference.

I have created some evil characters in many of my stories. If someone hates them, that's to my credit because that means I wrote a believable bad person, which is not easy if you are a basically wonderful human being like myself...

I didn't think the original poster was worried about comments as personal attacks. He's writing a cuckhold story and expressed concerns over comments attacking such stories: author, characters, or situation.

I had one comment directed at my last story about the Club, and he expressed his anger at the Club manipulating the guy and giving me a 1 rate for that. I posted a comment thanking him for explaining it, and thus a 1 well deserved.

But this future writer seems concerned over the probable comments such as those I listed, attacking the story/characters when they know it's going to be such a story.

 

[lovecraft68]

Given the infamous reputation of "Loving Wives," I personally would not post cuck stories there. I'd post them wherever the next most proximate kink in the story, or aspect of the story, dictates. It's just not worth it, otherwise.

I fully understand that when you're not being paid, feedback is the primary motivator and negative feedback kills motivation. I would be VERY free with the banhammer for commenters if I ever did post in Loving Wives (an unlikely event) but even having to do that can sap the juices, I get it. So I would just on balance avoid the category.

The only issue with the banhammer is you've seen the comment, and can't un-see it. Banning it makes it so others don't see it, but it does nothing to take the sting away if you're someone that those comments bother.

Best to avoid it unless you're someone who can let stupid shit like that slide off your back.

 

[JayJams78]

You will always deal with negative attacks because you are creating and putting it out there. There is always someone who won't like your work or words. That's true in art and in life. You have to evaluate why you are doing it and who it is for. If they are not your intended audience, don't worry about it. If they are, take it as constructively criticism, adjust, learn, and move on. A writer needs a thick skin.

 

[JayJams78]

I tend to quote Stephen King in his On Writing quite a bit.(An excellent book for writers, by the way.) He said it well. You write with your door closed (that is, for you). You rewrite with your door open (that is for your audience).

 

[Lifestyle66]

...
It makes me question myself: why am I writing if majority of people are going to hate it anyways?

...

I've had my own struggles with the negative comments:

"Pointless. Hope it means something for you."
or
"Lol. What disgusting trash. Deviant losers."

Then I get one like: "Outstanding storytelling and great storyline. Wonderfully enjoyable read. You do such a great job with the writing and letting your readers know what the characters are thinking and their ups and downs in their emotions. .."

So, it's those few gems that keep me from saying "Fuck it!" I have at least a few appreciative fans I don't want to disappoint.

 

[oneblueye]

hey...

the best way that I found to deal with hateful and hurtful comments,
let em roll off my back like water off a duck.

 

[JuanaSalsa]

If you post anything on the internet, in any form, anywhere, soon or later, people are going to show up to hate on it. I take this as a fundamental truth of the universe.

For those of us who are very sensitive to criticism, it can be really daunting to brave those first hurtful comments. I've written a lot of autobiography online (non-erotic) and have had some pretty shitty comments with all manner of vitriol specific to me - not merely to characters or writing ability but specifically telling me that I'm a terrible person. It hurts. I've cried over what people have said online, even if it's clearly untrue and entirely their problem. You might too. That's OK.

As someone who did not have super thick skin at first, and was not able to just let negative comments not bother me, here's my recommendation to you: Start slow. Maybe, turn off comments for your first few stories. Get used to the idea of putting your words out in the public without the anxiety of waiting for what people are going to say. Once you build some confidence in your writing and your audience, you can always turn on comments then.

In the grand scheme of things, you cannot get the good without the bad. You can't have access to the people who will like what you write and tell you that, without also giving access to those who will hate it.

Personally, I don't like to delete negative comments. If your work is viewed enough, bad comments can draw good comments after them. Ultimately, the nasty comments are a reflection of the commenter, not you. I figure, let them be responsible for what they've written, I'm not going to hide the evidence for them. Although, it matters less here, where people can be totally anonymous, than on other forums where I've written.

 

[gordo12]

The alternative to all this is to go to a site where Cuck is embraced and welcomed. Ourhotwives .org (library) is one. Xleg writes there. There are other sites.

There are so many assholes running around in LW waving around their own definition of what a cuck story is, it's almost impossible to rise above the noise. You do need a thick skin to post there.

 

[ChloeTzang]

Browsing through the comments of cuckold tagged stories in Loving Wife category makes me feel so low. There are occasional good comments, but most comments are spiteful and judgmental.

I understand that if I am going to put my work out in public domain, people would be judging it and I am all in for it. In fact, I would want them to judge me and offer feedback, but it should be based on merit of my writing.

Some commenters just post hateful comments based on the cuckold theme of the story. It doesn't make any sense to me. Why do they even read cuckold-tagged stories if they hate the theme?

It makes me question myself: why am I writing if majority of people are going to hate it anyways?

Should I consider posting my story in other section like Fetish or Novella and escape the trolls? Or should I bite the bullet and post it in Loving Wife category as this is where my potential readers lurk around. I want my story to reach the maximum number of audience who enjoy such theme.

LOL. Post a story in Loving Wives and it's gonna happen, sure as can be. The one star bombs and the hateful comments go with the territory. It's a case of embrace the suck, and do it, or pick another category which is more forgiving until your skin thickens and you shed trolls and one-star bombs as easily as a British car sheds oil and parts....

 

[Zeb_Carter]

Every comment I get, either enlightens me or gives me a good laugh. Plus, I as the author have the power to delete those that I... I deem unnecessary or just plain spiteful.

It's my opinion that those who leave comments full of hate are/have been cuckolds for a long time against their will. I always get a good laugh from those types.

And what I write isn't about me, it's called fiction for a reason.

 

[lovecraft68]

Perspective is a useful tool in the sense of in the grand scheme of life does what some asshole on the other side of internet think really matter?

When I was 13 I was in a foster home with another girl a year older. We went to the same school and one day at lunch the entire cafeteria was chanting "Pound puppies" because someone found out we were foster kids.

Kids commit suicide today over someone being "mean' online.

Back then we somehow dealt with it because what choice did you have.

So when I say I give zero fucks what's said to me, or about me or my work here or anywhere else, I mean it because once you've dealt with that level of cruelty, not to mention the abuse that put me in a home to begin with...

The words of a bunch of impotent assholes and their bandwidth courage mean nothing to me, and should mean nothing to anyone else.

We're all adults here and over the course of our lives someone in real life has said or done something shitty to us that was far worse than telling you that your story sucks or whatever dumb shit they say here.

So look at the source, the platform and the content and take it for what its worth which is nothing and stop crying about stupid comments from stupid people.

You do you, and let them to themselves because odds are no one else is doing them.

 

[RetroFan]

The impression I've got from limited forays into Loving Wives is that some of the audience there are quite misanthropic. For example, they claim to dislike cuckold stories (the sub-group in this category that seems to create the most negative feedback) but actually love it when new cuckold stories are posted on the site so they can hate the story, get angry about it and post negative comments.

 

[ChloeTzang]

The impression I've got from limited forays into Loving Wives is that ... they actually love it when new cuckold stories are posted on the site so they can hate the story, get angry about it and post negative comments.

Oh they do, and it's such fun poking the ants nest. As long as you don't mind the spin offs on scores. Which I find I dont worry about any more, altho I did the irst couple of years I was here. Now? It's fun

 

[Comshaw]

I have been a long time fan of Loving Wife stories, specially the ones with cuckold theme. I have enjoyed them so much that they have inspired me to write my own version of it and give back to the community.

Good news: I have started my journey towards writing my first ever story!

Now comes the tough part. As much as I am enjoying the process of writing, in back of my mind, I cannot help but imagine how readers would react to my writings.
Browsing through the comments of cuckold tagged stories in Loving Wife category makes me feel so low. There are occasional good comments, but most comments are spiteful and judgmental.

I understand that if I am going to put my work out in public domain, people would be judging it and I am all in for it. In fact, I would want them to judge me and offer feedback, but it should be based on merit of my writing.

Some commenters just post hateful comments based on the cuckold theme of the story. It doesn't make any sense to me. Why do they even read cuckold-tagged stories if they hate the theme?

It makes me question myself: why am I writing if majority of people are going to hate it anyways?

Should I consider posting my story in other section like Fetish or Novella and escape the trolls? Or should I bite the bullet and post it in Loving Wife category as this is where my potential readers lurk around. I want my story to reach the maximum number of audience who enjoy such theme.

I will bet $10.00 against the hole in a doughnut that EVERYONE who posts a story here wonders how it will be received and are, at least a bit, trepidatious about it when they hit that send key. It's human nature. All we can do is throw it out there and see if they like it, or leave it in our story folder and wonder. Me? I take a deep breath, throw it out and see if it floats.

There will always be a faction that is going to hate a story, no matter where it's posted. LW just happens to be a place with a huge concentration of trolls, more than any other place I've seen. Knowing that, if I felt like I was going to get a plethora of negative and hateful comments and I didn't want to put up with it, I'd post in a different category.

Comments should be a learning tool, and most are, even if they aren't couched in the most polite terms. That said sometimes a comment is nothing more than noise. The key is to differentiate between the two. An example was a comment I got on one of my stories, "Cheating is cheating 1!" An example of burning the house down because they didn't like the couch.

I disagree that a majority will hate it because it contains a cuckold situation. The problem lays in the fact that the hateful minority are also the most vocal about their hate. Check the reads, votes and comments and you'll see that the vast majority of those who open the story move on without voting or commenting. That number, to me, is a much more telling indicator of whether it is liked or not.

It all comes down to your comfort level. Can you ignore the asshats? Or will it eat at you? If you can, post it in LW. If not, find another category to put it in. We all have to do what we need to do for us.

I hope which ever way you go, it works out how you want it to.

Comshaw

 

[SimonDoom]

I'm curious whether the Loving Wives downvoting and nasty comment phenomenon exists at other sites as well. I seldom venture beyond Literotica for my reading anymore (I did a lot in the past and I don't recall this phenomenon being so bad) and don't know the answer. Is it something that is unique to Literotica?

It's interesting to me that the phenomenon seems to have become worse. One can find older "happy cheating wife" stories that scored reasonably well. As far as I can tell, it's almost never true now, not even for very well written stories.

 

[gordo12]

I'm curious whether the Loving Wives downvoting and nasty comment phenomenon exists at other sites as well. I seldom venture beyond Literotica for my reading anymore (I did a lot in the past and I don't recall this phenomenon being so bad) and don't know the answer. Is it something that is unique to Literotica?

It's interesting to me that the phenomenon seems to have become worse. One can find older "happy cheating wife" stories that scored reasonably well. As far as I can tell, it's almost never true now, not even for very well written stories.

I blame the GB and the Political Board for the current troll situation. Lit started out years ago as a noble, no censorship, discuss what you like site. That's fallen by the way in a staggering number of disaffected trolls eager to tear anything and everything apart. They're our version of the English Soccer Thugs! Look at the success of 8 chan and certain politicians that have catered to those morons.

It was a wonderful idea at the time but time has moved on and the management at Lit needs to decide whether they're a writing/author site or a sewer. Right now it's a sewer and LW is one of the outlets.

That being said, there is a huge readership here, the so-called silent majority that say nothing, read and enjoy. You got 50 negative comments? I'll bet you had 20,000 people or more open your story and say nothing. The ugly commentary compared to the readers is a minuscule number percentage-wise.

 

[TadOverdon]

Okay, then, an unpleasant thing about me: I get enough of a charge out of writing the kind-of-mild cuckold scenes that I do, that once I got used to the negativity that comes with posting that kind of thing on lit, I've come to enjoy the sense that I hit some guy's panic button with one.

I'm a mean one, I guess.

There's a lot of cuckold fiction and comics and videos online. As in a lot, lot. Which means a lot of somebodies get off on it, and far as I can tell most of that content is aimed at men.

 

[Trionyx]

Another option...

Publish in LW and if things don’t go well and the comments are too much, ask for the story to be pulled. You can always tweak it a bit and resubmit in another category. It is true that deleting a comment might incite that person to target all of your subsequent stories. It is amazing how many sickos with nothing better to do are out there.

 

[ChloeTzang]

the best way that I found to deal with hateful and hurtful comments,
let em roll off my back like water off a duck.

Exactly!!

And my Valentines Day story is going to be in Loving Wives, so I will soon demonstrate what a duck looks like. LOL.

 

[Black_and_White_Writer]

My take? Publish to LW with the expectation of being pummeled by creeps and lowlifes. As the others have mentioned, there are constructive comments, kernels of learning amid the chaff.

Above all, do not take any of the comments personally. "They" don't know you and never will, so how can it be personal?

I don't delete the idiot comments as it is my belief that the (lack of) quality of the comment and person making them is self-evident. Also, you may trip over the bad of the bad, somebody who takes offense at their input being "censored" and decide to mess with you in revenge especially if there is a scoring system involved. I have personally experienced this on other forums, so it does happen.

That’s something I’d not thought of. Certainly is good for thought.

The really inane comments I’d thought of deleting. But I do think – why bother? they’ll look like idiots. I had thought of deleting the anonymous negative comments – but that’s like 95% of them in my experience here.

 

[policywank]

Okay, then, an unpleasant thing about me: I get enough of a charge out of writing the kind-of-mild cuckold scenes that I do, that once I got used to the negativity that comes with posting that kind of thing on lit, I've come to enjoy the sense that I hit some guy's panic button with one.

I'm a mean one, I guess.

There's a lot of cuckold fiction and comics and videos online. As in a lot, lot. Which means a lot of somebodies get off on it, and far as I can tell most of that content is aimed at men.

I like tweaking the trolls and the more they try to run me off the more I am determined to stay. Mean? Maybe or maybe just a natural reaction to their nonsense.

 

[Twalter22]

I don't think you will be able to dodge the insecure MGTOW crowd ideally they will be over shadowed by those of us who are fans of the subject.
I wish you well and look forward to reading your work. Hopefully many submissions are in the works

 

[MajorRewrite]

It's interesting to me that the phenomenon seems to have become worse. One can find older "happy cheating wife" stories that scored reasonably well. As far as I can tell, it's almost never true now, not even for very well written stories.

There are cuck and “happy cheating wife” stories in LW that have scored over 4.5 in the last 12 months. It’s easy to spot those titles on the popular stories list. So the situation isn’t as dire as some think.