How do you tell a smoker or drinker that they MUST quit?

[lobito]

When they've been doing it most all their lives, and then they find out they have serious health issues because of it...

My Father is an alcoholic, and I can see myself following in his footstep, if I let the stress in my life get to me. I wanted so many times to talk with him about it, but it never goes well with him. Especially when everyone around him is drinking as much.

I just got an email from 2 cousins this morning, telling me that an Uncle back in the States, has Cancer in the "advanced stages", giving him 6-18 months to live. He's had heart attacks, and been hospitalized with problems for years, but he on't listen. Everytime he comes home from the Doctor/hospital, the fist thing he does, is fire up a smoke again. His Son told me that his Father and (our) Aunts did that very thing right after being released form the hospital for a collapsed lung, while getting tissue for some tests last week.

Do people ever learn a fucking thing, before it's too late?

With the past 8 months in my life, I don't need anymore of this shit, someone please take it form me, and pass it on to someone who's more strong than I thought I was...

 

[greybeard]

only so much............

there truly is only so much you can do..............if they don't take heed, well, that is their choice ultimately.............you, on the other hand, do not need to follow in their steps........that is the best that you can do.................

greybeard

 

[perks]

Sounds like he's been told already.
Sounds like he's still making his own choices.

You can choose to live with his choice and his death, or leave the situation and cut ties.

That's the only choice you have.

 

[Guest]

Everyone dies, you know.

 

[superlittlegirl]

If smoking is the only thing that makes his last days tolerable, why deny him that?

Telling a smoker to quit isn't really a good idea, in my opinion. It only stresses them out and makes them want to do it more. We're talking about addiction. A physical state of being. Quitting is not just an easy choice someone can make on a whim. It's not like they don't know it's dangerous. You won't be telling the person anything new.

What you can do, though, is support that person in whatever decision he or she makes. You'll be appreciated for it, ultimately.

Or, you can cut ties. Remember him how he was at his pinnacle, rather than watching the inevitable decline. I'd probably choose this option if the first became too painful.