how do i make him last longer

[Guest]

my boyfriend and i have been sexually active with each other for quite awhile now. the only complaint i have is that he doesnt last very long (he wasnt a virgin when we first got together). i've tried taking care of him orally before intercourse, but that doesnt seem to matter and i absolutely hate it when i'm right on the edge and he stops cuz he's all done. is there some way i can get him to last longer during sex?

 

[P. B. Walker]

There are several delaying exercises that he can do to enable him to last as long as he or you desire. He needs to be able to learn how to control when his orgasm will happen. To do this, he has to be able to recognize those feelings he has as orgasm is approaching. Once he knows he is about to orgasm he can stop, let himself cool down a bit and then start going again. And this is definitely something you can do together. Most of these exercises involve building him up to the brink of orgasm and then stopping. Once he's cooled down a bit, you start again and then stop again before orgasm. You go thru several of these cycles (4 to 10 times depending) until finally you allow the orgasm to happen. As you do these exercises more and more, he'll find that he can go longer and longer before reaching orgasm. He'll also find he can control it easier (ie., if he wants to orgasm he can, but if he wants to last 30, 40, 60 mins he can). You can find these exercies on the internet. Here's one place that I know of (it also contains a ton of other info):

http://www.jackinworld.com/

hope that helps,

- PBW

 

[gbd]

More sex!

I do not know how old you and your boyfriend are, but when I was young I could not last that long. Doing what PBW does helps a lot. One thing that happened to me was the more sex I had, the head of my cock became desensitized to a certain degree, which enabled me to last longer also. And last but not least, have your boyfriend literally think of something else. The old joke used to be, to last longer, think of baseball. In other words stop thinking about the pleasure you are receiving and think of something else. Sounds strange but you will last longer.

 

[Trinka]

Try wearing 2 condoms to desensatize yourself.

 

[Guest]

Re: More sex!

I do not know how old you and your boyfriend are,

we're pretty young i guess.. i'm 20.. and he'll be 21 next month


and i'll try some of the suggestions left here.. maybe i can have more fun with him during oral (as if i dont already *angelic smile*)

 

[schatz]

There is a technique I read about that may help a bit. When he is about to orgasm, either you or him should take one or two fingers and apply firm pressure to his perrinium(the area between his scrotum and anus) and hold the pressure through his orgasm. The trick to this is that he will orgasm but should not ejaculate if done correctly. In not ejaculating, he may maintain his erection longer. Of course, on a side note, there is no reason why he has to stop when he is finished. Even if he starts losing his erection, he can continue stimulating you with groin pressure on your clitoris.

 

[weathered2]

...Of course, on a side note, there is no reason why he has to stop when he is finished. Even if he starts losing his erection, he can continue stimulating you with groin pressure on your clitoris.

Exactly, which begs the question, does he even know the situation you describe exists? All this advice pre-supposes that you've discussed this and he's willing to try ways to improve the situation. Recalling my own situation at that age, I never would have realized there should have been more in it for my partner if someone hadn't finally told me. If you haven't discussed this it could be delicate due to our stupid male ego thing. My wife bought us "both" books to read from the male and female point of view and "we" studied them, homework and all. The rest, as they say, is history.

 

[Eric623]

I've always been a little quick on the draw myself. What I've learned is to make sure my partner has her orgasm(s) during foreplay. Then how long I last is not such a big issue. Start with a nice sensuous massage, kiss every inch of her body, work my way down... When concentrating on making her happy, I'm not thinking about my cock, how close I may or may not be to cumming. It's a win-win solution.

 

[Guest]

Eric 623 has the right idea!!

I too suffered from lasting only 10-15 minutes until I started an anti-anxiety medication (Paxil). This has changed things dramatically for the better. Now it takes much, much longer. Call it being more comfortable with myself or whatever, but for example in the last month my wife and I have had about 30 hours of sex, and I've cum about 4 times. When I do it takes at least an hour and she's cum a good 5 times by then. This is a good thing - the orgasms last 3-4 times longer, the volume is at least triple, and it is just SOOOOO much better. Now my wife is saying "I CAN'T cum any more!!" and is threatening to rent me out to work off some energy!! Any takers?

So, you may want to consider ruling out any medical issues. Good luck!