"Hey Mom! I Write Porn!"

[carsonshepherd]

money does not buy happiness. I see unhappy rich people all the time. But half of their issue is they don't know how lucky they are. I don't think any of the three of us would have that issue.

Money is not the answer. but it does not suck either.

I've always felt fortunate my parents taught me to value other things more than money (those hippies )

Maybe they knew I'd never make any!

 

[rikaaim]

I've always felt fortunate my parents taught me to value other things more than money (those hippies )

Maybe they knew I'd never make any!

I never had money, but spent like I did. I had to learn the hard way. Anyway, my other pharmacist, she's a real friend, said that no matter how much you make, it's never enough. The things you buy just get more expensive, but you never really get happier, you just spend more.

 

[minsue]

I never had money, but spent like I did. I had to learn the hard way. Anyway, my other pharmacist, she's a real friend, said that no matter how much you make, it's never enough. The things you buy just get more expensive, but you never really get happier, you just spend more.

I've a feeling she's right, though I'd love the chance to prove her wrong.

 

[Belegon]

I never had money, but spent like I did. I had to learn the hard way. Anyway, my other pharmacist, she's a real friend, said that no matter how much you make, it's never enough. The things you buy just get more expensive, but you never really get happier, you just spend more.

It is all a matter of keeping your expectations realistic. I work in financial services in one of the most upscale communitites in the country. I see people who have let the money free them and those who have let it enslave them. It is a tool only, and can be used for good or ill.

 

[rikaaim]

It is all a matter of keeping your expectations realistic. I work in financial services in one of the most upscale communitites in the country. I see people who have let the money free them and those who have let it enslave them. It is a tool only, and can be used for good or ill.

Yeah. I agree. That's why I live for my happiness. I want to be smarter, richer, better looking, but I have to be happy first.

 

[BlackShanglan]

No more talk about jobs and money. You're making the horse nervous.



Shanglan

 

[rikaaim]

No more talk about jobs and money. You're making the horse nervous.



Shanglan

*softly brushes horsey's maine*

There there. Where you're going you won't need money.

Feel better?

 

[Colleen Thomas]

No more talk about jobs and money. You're making the horse nervous.



Shanglan

*a carrot, an apple, a lump of sugar and some honey oats*

That should make for a happy Horsey

*HUGS*

 

[shereads]

Trying to decide whether I should tell her. She's been after me about letting her read my stuff forever.

Um...I don't know about your mom, but if the hospital waiting rooms where you live are as uncomfortable as the ones I'm familiar with, I'd consider writing a few stories just to show mom.

 

[shereads]

It is all a matter of keeping your expectations realistic. I work in financial services in one of the most upscale communitites in the country. I see people who have let the money free them and those who have let it enslave them. It is a tool only, and can be used for good or ill.

I would use it for good, not ill.



For the most part.


~ ~ ~


Topic detour: After Florida started its state lottery, the first people to win a huge jackpot were interviewed on TV and asked what they planned to do with the $40 million.

God help me, I remember their answer word-for-word because it made my jaw clench so tight my teeth hurt:

"First we're going to Gatlinburg, then we're going to pay off our balloon mortgage."



Yeah, envy is one of the deadly sins. I still maintain that with $40 million I could have made that couple and several generations of their offspring completely happy, supported a charity or two, and had $30 million left over for some serious, Malcolm Forbes-style, private-island-in-French-Polynesia, villa-on-Lake-Como rich-bitch living.

 

[yui]

Trying to decide whether I should tell her. She's been after me about letting her read my stuff forever.

I'm with shereads. My mother would do something dramatic...like die, if she knew I felt compelled to write porn.

 

[rgraham666]

My mom knows. She's not comfortable with it, but she knows. So do all my siblings.

Not worried about the other stuff. I'll never have a real job again. I live in the second most laid back city in Canada.

And if people ain't cool with what I write, that's their problem. And if they decide to express their displeasure, I can use the exercise.

 

[Seattle Zack]

The problem I ran into is not who you tell ... it's who they tell.... and who they tell ... and so one.

Such a salacious little bit of gossip, it's bound to get around.

My first job as a contract employee (after I left Monolithic Global Domination Enterprises Inc. where I'd worked for thirteen years) was at a video game company, where I was hired to write instruction manuals for several games.

It was a short term deal, only six weeks. Hoping to impress the little hottie receptionist, I mentioned that I wrote "erotica." Even worse, I gave her a signed copy of the anthology that included two of my stories.

So, two weeks later, this leering middle management type (think Bill Lumbergh in Office Space) comes up to me in the break room.

"So, how's your *writing*?"

"Pretty good," I said. "If they don't change anything, we should be finished ahead of schedule."

He lowered his voice. "No, I hear you write porn movies." *Nudge nudge* "You ever meet Jenna Jameson?"

Good Lord. This was the last thing I needed. I made some feeble excuse and got the hell out of there. And resolved, from that point on, never to tell anyone I worked with about my recreational activities.

 

[shereads]

Thought-provoking article, Zack. Scary, too, even for someone who only writes in the SRP forum. As much as I admire those who have the courage to use their own photos in their AVs, this is a reminder that what we risk here can be a lot more serious than embarrassment or even a jolt to my Mom's pacemaker.

Be careful, authors.

You shouldn't have to be careful. But pornography laws are so vague - at least in the USA - that any one of us might be guilty of a crime as defined by a local prosecutor's imagination. Or an employer's.

"I know far too many people who have been fired, stalked, threatened, had their writing used against them in divorces and child custody cases, and much worse.

<snip>

"Even the most—supposedly—tolerant companies have a hard time with an employee who writes smut. A liberal court will still look down on a defendant who's published stories in Naughty Nurses. <snip>

"What can we do? Well, aside from joining the ACLU there isn't a lot to we can directly do to protect ourselves if the law, or Bible-wielding fanatics, break down our doors, but there are a few relatively simple techniques we can employ to be safe. <snip>

"Assess your risks. If you have kids, if you have a sensitive job, if you have touchy parents, if you live in a conservative city or state, you should be extra careful about your identity and what you are writing. Even if you think you have nothing to lose, you do—your freedom. Many cities and states have very loose pornography laws, and all it would take is a cop, a sheriff, or a district attorney to decide you needed to be behind bars to put you there. <snip>

"If you have anything to lose, use a pseudonym, a post office box, never post your picture, and so forth. Women, especially, should be extra careful. I know far too many female writers who have been stalked or Internet-attacked because of what they do.

<snip>

"Write what you want, say what you believe, but do it with your eyes open. Understand the risks, accept the risks and be smart about what you do—so you can keep working and growing as a writer for many years to come.

 

[shereads]

So, two weeks later, this leering middle management type (think Bill Lumbergh in Office Space) comes up to me in the break room.

"Hey, Zack. How's it goin'? Yeah...I'm gonna need you to go ahead and show some of those stories you've been writing to the Executive Committee. So if you could just go ahead and print those out, that would be great."

I had a Lumbergh, too. And both of the Bobs.

 

[impressive]

Re: Re: "Hey Mom! I Write Porn!"

I'm with shereads. My mother would do something dramatic...like die, if she knew I felt compelled to write porn.

My mother would be mortified ... not that I'd written smut, but because of what "OTHER PEOPLE" would think of HER. It's always been about the image to her.

Now, she might eventually be able to face her friends and acknowledge (perhaps even with a smidgen of pride) the straight one-on-one stories (few as they are), but the group and lesbian stuff ... um, no. Just too scandalous for small town U.S.A.

Given that all but one of my poems are inspired by another woman, that'd be taboo too.

I choose to believe, though, that my dad is enjoying my work from his grave ... and now grandma is doing her naughty "tsk tsk" over my efforts.

 

[OhMissScarlett]

As a writer of artsy butt sex myself, I've been fairly open with everyone about what I write. Everything I've ever written has eventually turned to porn, so finally I embraced it and went with it. My parents know and support me and both have thanked me for introducing them to this site.

Recently my mom told my grandma that I write erotica on the big evil internet. I guess Grandma was bugging her because I never show her what I'm writing. Now I'm sure Grandma is busy praying for my soul harder than ever. Oh well, it gives her something to do. Grandma just wishes I would write something family oriented. Oh and I am, just not in the way she imagines, lol.

That said, there are a lot of other people I really wouldn't want to know that I write erotica, like my SO's family and Carson's grandma. Basically, I wouldn't tell any Baptists that I know at all.

 

[sweetnpetite]

What if she says "OH *you're* CarsonShephard- I *love* his stuff!"? (I'm assuming that's not your real name.)

 

[BlackShanglan]

What if she says "OH *you're* CarsonShephard- I *love* his stuff!"? (I'm assuming that's not your real name.)

That ... is my dream for how this will turn out Best of luck, Carson.

You could always tell first and show later if cirsumstances warrant. As we all try to remember, "show" has a much more powerful impact. If you just "tell" - "Mom, I write some gay porn" - then maybe you can escape the more powerful backlash from her actually reading any of it

Shanglan

 

[carsonshepherd]

As a writer of artsy butt sex myself, I've been fairly open with everyone about what I write. Everything I've ever written has eventually turned to porn, so finally I embraced it and went with it. My parents know and support me and both have thanked me for introducing them to this site.

Yeah, but... Scarlett.... Your parents are freaks.

You could always tell first and show later if cirsumstances warrant.

Actually I was pondering the opposite. Send her a link to my members page and then wait for the fallout. (Which probably won't be that bad, really...)

 

[Guest]

I've told my Mum I write Erotic Horror (which, as most of you know, I do), but with the emphasis on the "Horror". I've never told her I write pure erotica, but she's never asked to read any of my stuff. I can imagine she will at some point, and when that happens, I'll just pick out one of my tamer pieces (not that there are any, really!) and let her read it.

I doubt she'll be horrified, or anything like that, because Mum is pretty open minded!

Lou

 

[doormouse]

My mum read M.I.K.E. of mine which has two sex scenes in it.... I tamed it down a bit for her lol

She still asked me what a 'mound' was lmbo

Tell her. You're an adult

 

[shereads]

Carson, you just never know. I have a friend whose father was an uptight evangelical minister, and who remembers her mother as a frightened, mousy little thing with no interests of her own. Mom has been a widow for a few years and recently told her daughter about her new hobby: writing erotica.

 

[carsonshepherd]

As long as the butt sex is artsy, I'll probably be okay. Then I can explain how it's artistic.

 

[rikaaim]

As long as the butt sex is artsy, I'll probably be okay. Then I can explain how it's artistic.

After she reads what you do, there will be no question in my mind that she'll appreciate your talent. You could get paid, and should, easily if you started doing novels. The only problem is that publishers usually want tension, i.e. thriller, to sell to the lazy public. If a general reader has to think about it, they don't want it. Books now seem to have become as lazy as television.