LITEROTICA PODCAST
LIT CAMS (200 Free Tokens)ADULT TOYSVOD MOVIES

Her solider.. Her ghost (open pm first)

His eyes sparkled while his heart nearly stopped from the beautiful show of her running her hands through her hair. Something that most men take like a grain of salt but not at this moment, not in this man’s eyes. How was he so lucky to find a special woman like this one. He questioned himself on how he could have went behind her back and joined the army when she loved him so much. Was he really that blind to her love, or was it that her love didn’t measure up to his dad’s expectations. He had to swallow the lump that formed in his throat. How could he sit here listening, admiring her strong love for him when he did this to her.

Why did she have to be so understanding, so gentle, he needed the harsh, bitter sediment from her of what he did to her. He didn’t have to join the army if he would have valued her as he is right now. Was he hiding behind this mask of being captured to cover over the act of cowardice he displayed against his father whom pressured him to be more than what he was at that time. Why didn’t he stand up to him and showed that he was a man whom decides his own destiny and none of this would have happened. She wouldn’t have went through a living hell that he could never take away from her.

Her loving gaze, the feel of her soft hand clasping upon his, followed by her words of wanting him to just stay with her. His eyes watered up as those were the same words she spoke to him when he had to leave for deployment. A slight calm came over him when she changed the subject, for he could feel his self-control faltering to the onslaught of his guilt of doing this to her. His questioning of himself on how he had the right to have someone like her loving him so much was pushing him to that edge.

“Yes sure, I will love to eat with you.” Once again allowing an event to cover up his guilt. His head lowered as the shame gripped his gut like a vice grip gripping a bolt. He looked up as he let the tears stream down his face. “I’m sorry Lilly.” once again he offer his apology for doing this to her all because of that moment of weakness. Unlike her whom had a world shattering event occur to her but yet she found the strength to hold on and love him.

“I don’t deserve you!” his pain filled his face and eyes, riddled his tone of voice. “None of this would have happened to you if I only stood up to my father and told him that I control my life not him. That is why I joined the army Lilly because of my father telling me that I should be doing more. Namely doing more for the family name instead of … he stopped not wanting to continue with his outburst. He pushed his face into his hands…
 
She didn't know how to really act around Scott, she had been angry and depressed for so long, she had pushed all of the people who loved her away, she shut herself away from the world, but in this moment of time she just had no anger left. She smiled gently at him, wishing somehow she could read his thoughts, but would she if she could, of course not she respected his privacy. She could feel that something was wrong with him but she didn't know how to ask.

She loved him so much, yet she had no idea what he had been through. She bit her lip as she so often did when she was deep in thought, or worried about something, or even just nervous. Oh Scott what's wrong, she thought to herself, wishing she could just say the words. She still held tightly to his hand, she needed him to know she was there with him and she wasn't going anywhere.

She wanted to be angry, but truth be told she was actually very proud of him, sure when he joined without telling her, she was furious and heartbroken, but then she realized that he was protecting the world in the long run, away went her anger, filled with sadness of missing him.. Him not holding her close as they slept, there arguments over the remote.. The making love, learning one anothers bodies, the submission she gave him in the bedroom.. The Happy Birthday, the bad days of school and work, family dinners on Sunday, just everything about him she missed.

She wished he would just say something to her, his sudden silence confused her. She could see something was bothering him, she just didn't know what. She knew she was close to her own breaking point, but him being here put her mind at least a little at ease, knowing at least he didn't die, but she also didn't know what he may have endured.

She didn't really know what to say to the man that she had loved so much. She knew she was being a little irrational, telling him not to leave her, she knew he wasn't going anywhere. She knew it was getting a little to deep, so she quickly changed the subject. She looked into his eyes, she wasn't sure what she seen there, but she didn't want to push him.

She smiled brightly when he told her he would eat with her. She went to get out of bed, but stopped just pulling the covers from her. She waited for him to move, so she could slide from the bed, but when he lowered his head, again she was confused. She was stunned when tears started to roll down his cheeks, her heart pounded, she never once seen Scott cry, aside from the day he left for deployment. Her heart started to ache for him, when he apologized to her, tears sprang to her own eyes.

Her head was spinning and all she wanted was to hold him tight and never let go.

She was taken back by his outburst that he didn't deserve her, she didnt feel like that at all, they deserved each other she thought to herself. She listened to him when he admitted the real reason he joined, yet she didn't know what to say, she understood completely why he joined. If he only knew how much she admired what he had done for their country. She took a deep breath when he stopped speaking.

She then climbed out the side of the bed that he wasn't sitting in, and walked over to him, she took his hands away from his face and kissed both of them, then placed them on her hips, she then crawled into his lap and buried her head into his neck, taking in his scent, before looking into his eyes. " It's okay, I love you, I'm proud of you.. Please don't blame yourself for what I have gone through.. I can't even imagine what you have gone through.. Please don't cry.. You are breaking my heart, I never could stand you being hurt or mad... Let's just eat.. And we will go from there."

She kissed his head gently, then his cheek, touching his face softly, before standing up and taking his hands in her own.

"I was angry for so long Scott I am just happy to see you, to know your alive." She couldn't tell him the anger and frustration she felt when she was told he was dead.
 
He felt her fingers wrapping around his hands, slowly pulling them away only to guide them to her hip. His fingers instantly caressed her skin for it has been so long since his hands touched any part of her body and the images of times past flowed into his head and heart. He could instantly feel the love of then come to the here and now. He looked up into her blue orbs. Her flowing crimson hair cascaded down over her left breast somewhat mesmerized him for a moment before Lilly slide onto his lap. His arms wrapped around her instinctively while she buried her face into the nape of his neck. He leaned his head slightly placing his cheek to hers. When she lifted her head, their eyes locked onto one another.

Her words were warming, flushing some of the guilt way for her understanding why he did what he did, but what brought him out of his stupor was her words of being proud of him. Lilly never said anything she didn’t mean. Even when she was angry and spouted things out they were exactly how see felt at that very moment. As with the moment here he could bank on her being proud of him. He looked deeper into her eyes and waited a few moments before speaking. “I love you too, always have and always will.” He nodded to her about the request of getting something to eat.

He felt the ushering flow of love when her lips touched his forehead, then to the wet skin of his cheek. His heart cried out in utter happiness that this wonderful woman was so unique and understanding, but what he was most thankful for was she was still his. He lifted himself off the bed when she took his hand. Her words reached his ears and he nodded his understanding. He knew now that she didn’t care about the past. There was nothing anyone could do to change it, it was a ship that was already set a sail, and she was now working on the ship that was their future and he was damn sure he was going to be on that ship when it sailed.

He looked into her eyes, “I want to thank you.” he remained holding her hands. “You have held onto our love, keep it cherished, put yourself through hell holding on to someone that by all means was dead to you. I cant explain how that makes me feel. How can you put words to a love that holds on like this….” he fights back the tears. “Know this. I can not show you this like you have shown to me, but I do love you with all of my heart and soul.” He shifts his weight, “I also want you to know if it wasn’t for you. I would have never made it home. I would have perished just like the others did. But the thought of being with you again, kept me going through all they did, kept me strong.” He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Then opened his eyes to look upon her once more. With a serous look … “Lilly, I … think our food is really cold now.” He allowed all the stress to come out as he began to laugh….
 
She wished things could be easier, she wished she could take all of the pain he felt away, she wished she could take her own pain away.. He didn't know how much she had changed. His touch against her skin felt like heaven to her, yet at the same time she felt somewhat nervous, it was almost like they were starting all over again. She wanted nothing more than to tell him everything would be okay, but truth be told she just didn't know.

When he looked into her eyes, she gave him a reassuring smile. She felt a little awkward just being in her bra and panties and yet safe all at the same time. It felt so good being in his arms again. She didn't realize just how much she had missed him, until now. When they looked at one another she felt the intensity between them.

She needed him to know that she didn't really blame him for doing what he did, but a part of her would always be a little angry that he joined without telling her in the first place, but she got over the anger and all she felt was pain. She realized that she was deep in thought. "I was so angry for so long, but then I realized that I was just masking the pain with anger." She whispered. She knew that they had both changed, she wasn't the same girl and she had pushed everyone she loved away, and she barely went anywhere anymore.

"I've never stopped loving you." She whispered huskily. She smiled when he nodded to her about the food.

She needed him to know that she didn't hold anything against him, sure what happened turned her into a person she didn't recognize, but she couldn't blame him for that. She was just grateful that he was alive, if he knew how angry she was after she was told he died it would hurt him she was sure. She smiled when he accepted the hand she held out for him. She still felt a little awkward being half naked in front of him.

The past was the past it would take her time to heal, but he was here and that was all that mattered to her right now. She knew he had things on his mind she always knew, they were that in sync with one another.

Her brow furrowed, confused at what he was thanking her for. She listened carefully to each and every word that he spoke to her. She smiled softly at him. "I was told so many times that I needed to move on, but I just couldn't." She responded. She knew how much he loved her, she didn't need words. "You're here now that's all that matters." She said softly. She laughed with him about the cold food. "Good thing for microwaves." She giggled.

"Let me grab a robe and I'll meet you in the kitchen."
 
Scott took a moment to look at, he knew that sex was the farthest thing on the list that needed to be addressed, but that wasn’t his intension with this obvious stare at her. He traveled slowly up from the floor to her eyes where he waits for the longest minute. “You still are the most gorgeous being that has been blessed to walk this earth.” He raised her hand up to his lips and placed a single deep kiss upon her wrist. “I am thee luckiest man in the world at this very moment.” His eyes sparkled with the emotion that swelled up inside of him… Pure love..

He nodded to her request of going on to the kitchen while she grabbed a robe. He reluctantly let go of her hand, and instantly it seemed like she was just a mere dream that he was having while still in the clutches of his captors. He dreamed of these mornings with her every morning, every afternoon, and evening. No, this wasn’t one of those dreams, but what it was two people that has been changed by a trauma and by the grace of God they are now brought back together, but are they really back together? She is different, He is different, they are not the same as they were before he left; so is this them trying to bring back those moments so they would be as they were, which could not be for they have changed; so is this why they keep speaking of the past and haven’t discussed the future of them for there might not be a them in the future? He shook his head and feared what he just realized. He looked at her once more and felt that pain he felt for the past two years.

“By the way, I never stopped loving you either.” He voiced before walking out of the room. His mind still thinking about them being different than before and if that would change what they had between them. He felt somewhat out of place, like this was his first date with her and it ended in the bedroom. He swallowed hard as he fought back the tears of fear. How could he handle a voluntary split up with her? He couldn’t he would have no reason to move on. He would always be punishing himself for his short giving’s.

He pushed all that back into his mind, as he grabbed her plate and put it into the microwave. He went to get a glass of water to put in with the food to help it stay moist. Pulling down a glass from the cabinet he moved over to the sink and turned the tap on. The water ran into the glass as he stood there but he wasn’t here, he was there.

He was sitting in a lean back chair, his hands tied to the arms, his feet tied to the legs His neck tied down to the frame of the high back. He was leaned back into what would be like a sink at a beauty salon. The water was running at full volume and he was pushed under it struggling to breath, his lungs were burning, he was choking from the water going down his throat and down his nasal passage. The pain was intense, he was screaming his name, rank and social security number. They shocked him while still under the water. He thought of Lilly, he thought of how she laughed, talked and how she would cuddle to him. They shocked him more..

The water was running over the top and cascading down his hand as he started into their laughing faces while he was drowning. Telling him that his girlfriend was a good fuck and that she kept on begging for more. His hand squeezed the glass harder as he tried to breath… He couldn’t get his breath, his body began to tremble, and shake..
 
She had dreamed of mornings and days like this so often, yet each time that she had a grasp on him he would vanish like every nightmare she had. She looked at him softly when he looked into her eyes. She blushed from head to toes at the sweetness of his words, she knew she looked a mess compared to the way she looked before. When he took her hand in his own and kissed her wrist, her heart pounded in her chest.

She smiled softly at him, she felt like the luckiest girl in the world, even if she felt that at any moment he would be taken away from her. She knew he meant every single word that he spoke.

She would get a shower and change in a bit, right now she didn't really want to be apart from him at all, but she also felt awkward just being in her bra and panties. She smiled softly when he let go of her hand, he looked as reluctant to let go, as did she. She wanted nothing more than to spend the entire day and night in bed with him, as he held her, but she knew there was to many things going on for that to happen.

She wanted to be with him and just forget the rest of the world, but could they really even do that. She had so many thoughts going through her mind at the moment, she felt like she was on a rollercoaster of emotions. She couldn't help but feel as if things were never going to be the same again. She was scared of what the future holds for them, right now all she could think about was the here and now. She felt her heart sink at the thought of them not being together.

Two years was a very long time.

His words were like sweet music to her ears. She watched him go, she was afraid that he was just a mirage to her imagination. She took a deep breath and looked at herself in the mirror when she made herself stand from her bed. So many memories flooded her head. She chewed on her lip when a sudden memories of him flooded to her mind. It was the day he asked her to marry him... Two weeks before deployment.

She remembered his words like he had just spoke them yesterday. It was at the highschool, at night on the steps.

She smiled. She remembered asking him why they were there, and he got down on his knee and pulled out a simple diamond ring, he knew Lillie liked the simple things. She then remembered exactly what he said to her. Lilly, I have loved you since our first dance at this very highschool, and I know I'll love you forever. I know I hurt you, by not telling you of my leave, but I promise I'll come home to you, and I'll make you my wife. She remembered the tears in her eyes when she said yes, and then when she had to say goodbye.

She snapped out of the memory and for a moment she felt the farmilar anger, she so often felt. Then she realized she had no reason to be angry. She had been so sad, and so lost for so long, that she wasn't sure if she would ever be the same again. She pulled herself together and pulled on her silk black robe, before tying it. She didn't want to spend to much time alone, for she still felt as if this was some kind of dream.

She didn't want him to see her weak, she wanted him to see her as he did before, but even she knew that was impossible. She sighed to herself and ran her fingers through her hair.

She wanted no needed to be near Scott. She didn't want him to feel like she didn't want to be near him. She walked into the kitchen and the scene there made her go white. She hurried over to the sink and turned the water off first. "Scott, hey it's Lilly..." She said softly trying to take the glass from his hand afraid he might break it and hurt himself. She then touched his face.. And took his free hand in her other hand.. She wasn't really sure what to expect, but she rarely ever seen Scott like this.

"Scott breath for me baby." She said in a soothing voice. "You're safe here love, I promise.. With me." She had no idea what he had gone through but seeing him like this she knew it couldn't be good...
 
He felt them slowly pulling him up and out of the chair, it was time to act! Instantly he went for the man’s throat, all he had to do was take this fucker down and the weapon was his, he could fight! His anger flowed, “Fuck you!” Scott yelled out, his hands only inches from the man’s throat… ‘Lilly?’ Scott froze what was Lilly doing here? “What is going on, Lilly how are you here?” then Scott turned white as he realized he had another one of his episodes, then he realized that his hands were around her throat. “OH MY GOD! Lilly! “ he pulled his hands away from her , backing away staring at his hands in disbelief.

“I..I .. Lilly?” Scott shook his head as things became clearer, he was home now, he wasn’t over there. He was home with his love and he almost strangled her. “NO, this doesn’t happen when I’m awake… No! it only happens when I sleep, NO! “ he continued to back away from her scared that he might have another one and really hurt her… No, I cant stay.. I have go..” he turned away from her, slightly still confused as he looked for the door.

This was what he feared, this was what he went to therapy when he got back and they gave him the green light after a few days of testing and talk sessions. But he wasn’t ok, he just tried to kill his fiancée. His hands came up in a stay away fashion as he backed toward the door. “I … I think it would be best if I go home and take a nap.. Maybe call Josephine. He looked at her with tears in his eyes. “I think it’s best if we don’t see each other for a few days, let me get my head on straight.

“I will call you.” He turned toward the door. Taking a last apologetic look at her before walking out the door. The tears fell, the pain of him just walking out on her hit him. He grabbed his head and screamed, leaning over and putting his elbows on his knees crying from the intense pain throbbing in his chest. How could this have happened now, was he relapsing? He had to find help, he had to get away from Lilly so he would hurt her again. This was what he feared…

He had to move on, he had to get as far away as he could because if not he would simply turn around and walk back, but he cant, she had to be safe, he forced each step forward away from her.. He begged her not to follow.. Please stay away.. I will hurt you the next time.. Just stay away.. He muttered into the wind as he began to run down the street. He had to get away…
 
She had never seen Scott so pale, or so lost before he was always the strong one, always there when she had a bad day at class, or at work, or if she was sick he was always there for her. What happened next however was the last thing that she had expected to happen. She heard not only anger in his voice, but also the fear behind his words. She panicked momentarily it was as if he hadn't even heard Lily's voice.

She heard him softly say her name weakly. She felt his hands around her neck as tears filled her eyes. She was gasping a little he really wasn't hurting her, hell she had felt more pain in her heart right now, seeing him like this. She knew he had no idea what was going on, she was confused, but she wasn't scared of him, she was more so aching for him. She looked softly at him when he removed his hands from her throat and she took several deep breaths and rubbed her neck a little bit.

She bit her lip when he backed away from her and then squeaked out her name. She could see he was trying to get his thoughts together. She was at a loss for words, what did one say in a situation like this. She listened to his frantic voice as he spoke in a panicked tone. She fought back tears, lord what had he gone through over there. She felt hopeless when he backed away from her. "Hey I'm okay." Was all she could really say, but she knew that neither of them were even close to being okay.

She felt her heart stop when he told her he couldn't stay there. No she thought she couldn't lose him again. She didn't think she could live if he left her all over again. She felt the same farmilar sting of pain hit her square in her heart, as she fought back the tears that wanted to fall from her eyes. She felt helpless that there was nothing she could Say to calm him down. She looked at him in fear when he put his hands up telling her to stay away.

His words cut her like a knife and yet she didn't want to push him no matter how much it hurt. She didn't know who Josephine was, and she didn't ask either, another woman was the farthest thing from her mind. She wanted nothing more than to walk up and grab him into her arms, but the fear and the lost look in his eyes told her that was the last thing he needed. A few days she thought, the last thing she wanted was to leave him.. She couldn't do this again... It hurt to much to lose him once it would crush her to lose him twice.

Really I'll call you, she thought to herself.. She looked at him helplessly as she felt the first tear roll down her cheek. When he turned towards the door it took everything in her not to run after him. When he walked out her door, she felt stunned just standing there, looking at the door. He really just left she thought, she nearly fell to the floor, she walked to the door then stopped herself. She looked at the door lost and confused, she needed to get dressed, she needed to go after him and yet she knew he didn't want her to..she needed to respect that.

She seemed frozen in place... If she didn't eat she would be no good to him.. But just the thought of food made her want to vomit. She rushed to her bathroom tears in her eyes as she took the fastest shower one could ever get. She couldn't just stay here, she couldn't just give up again, she knew the only person that could remotely help her and that was her brother but she had pushed him so far away would he even want to see her.

She quickly dressed and wiped the tears from her eyes.. Would she even be able to drive like this, her eyes red from tears, her stomach aching from lack of food and her heart aching for the loss of the only person she had ever been in love with, it didn't matter she couldn't stay in there apartment..she left a note in case he did come back... "The hardest thing to ever do was try to get over you... The easiest thing I've ever done was love you.. Now the hardest thing Is staying away from you.. I don't want to lose you again, I can't it's killing me.. I am going to leave I can't stay in this apartment everything reminds me of you in this house.. I love you." A tear fell on the paper as she wrote his name on it, though she knew he would not be coming back to the apartment.

She touched the ring on her neck absentmindedly, as she left not bothering to lock the door. She ran to her car and drove to her brothers house.. She debated on her parent's but she didn't want to upset them, she had done that enough even though they always told her they were there and they loved her. She pulled up to her brothers house and fought back the tears as she knocked on his door, wondering if he or his wife would answer..

Image from http://c.mwp4.me/media/wallpapers_1...obile-wallpaper-1080x1920-4936-1456224506.jpg.
 
Last edited:
Kelly walked to the door after hearing the doorbell taking a few moments to look out the Peep hole, her eyes went wide upon seeing the state of Lillian. "Teddy it's your sister!" She pulled the door open quickly "Lillian! Come in." She reached out and took Lillian’s hand into her own and gently pulled her into the house. "What's going on sweetheart?" She looked over to Ted whom was now standing in the living room doorway.

Ted took a step forward, "Lillian what's up?" His voice gentle but still not overly excited that she was here. He could see the evidence that she'd been crying again. He wondered if it was another melt down about Scott. It's been two years now and she does this to herself by hanging on to him. She pushed him away when he was trying to help her move on, even set her up with a man who knew what was going on and understood the pain she was in but that didn't matter to him he still wanted to met and get to know her but instead she let him set at a restaurant alone for an hour waiting for someone who wasn't even coming.

"Let me guess this deals with Scott again!" Kelly turned toward him angrily "TED!" She barked at him. "Why don't you just watch tv." She hissed at him. He shrugged before walking into the other room. "Honey, come sit down. She took her to the study and sat her down on the loveseat. "Let me go get you some warm milk." She lightly cupped Lillian’s face. "It's going to be okay love." She headed out of the room. She looked at Ted with a ‘I don’t believe you can be so cruel!’ glare.

A few moments later she came back with some hot milk. "I've put a little bit of diazepam in there to help you relax. I will call in a prescription for you in the morning. Now drink that up and I'll take you to the guest room where you will stay with us for the night.” She sat next to her on the loveseat and put her arms around her. “Come on, I know how you were when this first happened and your skinner than you were then so that tells me your not eating again. You know coming to a Doctors house wasn’t a good move being in the condition your in.” she pushed the needle into Lillian’s thigh. “I knew you wouldn’t drink the milk so I had to use a different tactic.”

“When you wake in the morning. We will talk without Ted being around. Just you and me. Now come on lets move you to the bed.” She help Lillian up and helped her to the bed. “Don’t fight it, I gave you enough it will knock you out anyway, but it will be smoother if you just relax and allow yourself to sleep.” She pulled the light sheet up to waist. “Relax, Your safe and with family. I will stay here till you fall asleep.” Kelly wispererd..
 
Lilly had no idea what she was going to say to her brother and his wife... Oh by the way Ted, Kelly Scott's alive. She heard Kelly's soothing voice yelling to Ted that is was his sister. Lillian was skeptical about walking into the house, she hadn't been the best sister in law or sister for that matter. Kelley's hand holding hers felt comforting, it made her feel so much guilt as to what had happened and how she had acted to her family and Scott's own, but how could you move on when you had so much to hold on, Kelley wasn't Ted's highschool sweetheart, Ted's first love.. What would his state be like had he lost his wife.

She didn't really know what to say when she spotted her brother... I can't just come out and say it she thought to herself. She looked up at her brother and she wouldn't blame him if he told her to get the hell out. His voice was soft but she could sense the tone in his voice as she took a deep breath. If he only knew she thought to herself, he would probably be lost just as she was. She wasn't sure if her neck had a mark on it or not and she was sure her hair covered it anyway.

She could look in his eyes and see his anger, she didn't blame him at all. She couldn't look at him anymore she felt like a horrible sister and person and she was. She knew she had alot to make up for.. She should have done the counseling like he had asked her too, should have moved on, but maybe deep down a part of her felt like he wasn't gone. She jumped a little at his angry tone, and she fought back more tears.

Kelly was the one person that always understood even though she knew she didn't deserve her kindness. "He has every right to be angry with me" She managed to choke out. She was a horrible person she couldn't even calm her love down, and he left her all over again, she didn't blame him she would have left herself too. She watched helplessly as her brother walked away to the living room. She looked at Kelly softly wondering why she was so nice to her.

Kelly led her to her study and sat her down then sat beside her. She nodded her head gently when she offered her warm milk. Lilly looked at her softly, and tried to smile at her. She didnt deserve the kindness Kelly was showing her. She looked up at Kelly when she came in with a cup in her hand. She didn't need to relax she needed to tell them why she was there. She shook her head no to a prescription, though she was sure she needed it.

She couldn't stay what if he went back to the apartment... But she knew he wasn't. She had never felt so bad and good at the same time, what the hell was wrong with her, yes he was the love of her life but her family needed her too. She shook her head that she had not been eating, yet she didn't think it was such a big deal. She looked at Kelly a little confused for a moment. Lillian gasped a little when she felt the needle in her Jean clad thigh.

"You.. You tricked me." She said in a little whisper. She didn't want to sleep, for sleep meant dreams, and dreams meant Scott.. She knew he was gone maybe for good this time. She knew her heart was in the right place yet she still ached for what she had put her brother through. Lillian felt a little groggy as Kelly helped her stand up. Lillian got into the bed, but she didn't want to sleep. "I sleep.. I dream.. I dream he dies." She whispered softly feeling her eyes grow heavy.

She closed her eyes but instantly her head hurt her tummy hurt her heart ached she felt as if she were dying but realistically she was just falling asleep. She fell asleep fast but in the middle of the night she woke in a cold swear screaming for her brother, for Scott.. To die herself.. She couldn't lose him again...
 
When Kelly came down stairs to confront Ted about the way he was acting, she found him gazing out the window. Something he did many times when he felt helpless to help his sister. She lowered her head slightly ashamed for snapping at him. “Ted I’m sorry.” she apologized walking over to him and putting her arms around his waist. Laying her head upon his shoulder, she knew he loved her but was hurting for not being able to help her. She even felt the sting of not being able to help and she was only family by law, not a bloodline member that would hit home harder.

“No Kelly don’t be sorry, you’re doing what I should be doing.” He put his hands over her hands when the clasped together before him. “I wasn’t mad that she stood up Allen, I could have cared less about that. I was hurting so much because I couldn’t help her, I just wanted the feeling of helplessness to go away and every time I seen her I seen my failure to help my sister. It got to the point where I didn’t want her around for the pain was just too much, then when time passed and she held on, and still came around all pain riddled, I was tired of feeling my pain and if she was going to hang on to him well that was her problem and I walked away. Well here, I am again feeling that pain for not being able to help her with her pain and it made me mad. Now staring out this window, I finally realized something, if I lost you I would never let go even if you were dead. I would hold on to everything about us. I would hold on to that love that we have now, the comfort and happiness we have now. I would never let that go, and she is doing the samething with Scott and here all this time even now moments ago I was telling her to move on, and yet I wouldn’t move on if I lost you.” He lowered his head. “I also found out how to help her, thanks to you. I just have to be here for her with open arms and comfort her as much as I can. Love her more now than what I did when we were little. I just hope she can forgive me.”

“No Ted, Don’t look for that forgiveness, forget about the past it’s a ship that has just been sailed this evening. She coming to you this evening after the fall out, that’s a new beginning chance, then you realizing what she is doing, and you stating that you would do the samething, there is your new beginning, there is no need to go back it time, only forward. She will have to go back because of Scott, but you stay here and be her anchor for the here and now. She needs that love, comfort from someone and that someone is us.” Ted turned toward her and hugged her. “Lets go to bed, we have someone that needs us in the morning.”

The scream came as Ted was grabbing his midnight cookie which ended up on the floor as Ted ran up the stairs full tilt toward the guess room where Lillian was. He pushed through the door to find Lillian sitting up, shaking, cold sweat running down her arms and face. He sat beside her and put his arms around her shoulder. “Sis,” pulling her to him, Kissing the top of her head. “I’m here for you. I love you.” He muttered to her while lightly rocking her. His eyes looking over as Kelly was standing at the doorway shaking her head in approval. “I will go get her something to drink.” Ted nodded.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
It was the same dream Lillian had over and over so many nights, but this time was different than the others, worse so much worse. She couldn't seem to walk away from this nightmare, or rather wake up from it. She had thrown the blankets from her in the night, her tank top Klinging to her, along with the tight jeans and little camisole she wore over the tank. She could hear his voice. She could feel his touch.

She could feel his pain and suffering that he had gone through because of her, this time it wasn't just about Scott this time her brother was part of this horrible nightmare. She could see Scott standing at that sink shaking, lost in another time and place. She could feel his hands around her neck, but that didn't hurt as much as his leaving her did. She could see herseld standing at that door helpless watching him leave all over again.

She could feel the anger and frustration with him leaving her there alone in that house. In this nightmare however there was a twist, she did chase after him, yet he was already long gone, and it seemed like she ran and ran and never could grasp him, she was running through a forest looking, barefoot and screaming out his name.. The dream just got stranger and stranger. She then found herself face to face with Scott, in the dream begging him not to go, but he told her he couldn't stay he wasn't what she needed that she needed to move on and forget about him.

She looked at Scott helplessly as tears filled her eyes and she begged him not to go. She told him if he could tell her he didn't love her anymore she would leave and let him be a free man. She waited for him to tell her he loved her but the words never came. Tell me you don't love me anymore, she begged.. And I'll go. He looked at her and said fine I don't love you anymore two years is a long time we need to move on.

She felt her chest tighten this dream was more real than any she had before. She tossed and turned and then was taken to another scene. She was standing on her brothers doorstep waiting to knock on the door.. But it never seemed to happen or at least she felt it couldn't happen, her hand was frozen. Finally she knocked and the door slowly opened, Kelly greeting her with kindness she knew she didn't deserve.

She looked for her brother and couldn't find him. She was greeted wih the coldest look she had ever been given by her brother. He asked why she was there, the bitterness in his tone evident of the disdain he felt for his little sister. She looked at him begging him to forgive her. She was told that he couldn't forgive her, that she ruined the family when she couldn't face the fact that Scott was dead. She was crying so hard she thought she felt as if she couldn't breath.

Her brother looked at her and told her to get out she wasn't welcome in his home. No-one wants her,she dreamed noone loved her, no-one needed her and it was all her fault she was a horrible person. She lost Scott and now she lost her brother she wanted to die.. She woke screaming unaware of where she was. She heard her brothers voice, it was soothing and didn't sound angry at all. It took her several deep breaths to calm down.

"Please dont hate me.. I'm so sorry for pushing you away don't kick me out." She muttered still feeling as if she was in the dream. She murmured.. "Scott's alive... He left me all over again.. But he's alive we have to find him." She said in a panicked voice.
 
Ted held her firmly as he realized that this must have been the way it was all this time and worse when he turned his back on her. He felt like shit but as his wife said, the past is the past. He had to be her anchor now, her go to person. He wished he could take the pain away from her but that isn’t possible so he would just hold her tight and let her know that there was someone here that loved her deeply. He could feel that pain of not being able to help her, his eyes watered up, but then he himself felt a loving hand on his shoulder which seemed to ease the pain for he knew someone was there for him as he will be for Lillian.

He held her tighter, “I don’t hate you Lillian! I love you Sis!” he swallowed hard for this was hurting him, he wanted to end her pain, take it away from her and swallow it for him to deal with. His body trembled with her words of not kicking her out. What was she dreaming? Why would she think he would kick her out. Was he that cold with her.. He closed his eyes as the shame hit him, but again he heard his wife’s whisper.. “That is in the past. Be her rock now.” She squeezed his shoulder. “Sis, that is something that will never happen. This will always be a home for you whenever you want it. I will always be here for you whenever you need me…But then she said something that scared him, he shot a look at Kelly whom was already moving toward her medical cabinet. His mind struggled to replay what he thought she said, Scott was alive! That they needed to find him? He closed his eyes as he realized his sister was having a mental break down. “It’s okay Sis.. Your okay..” he didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know if he should tell her that he was dead or play along with her and tell her that they would find him till his wife sedated her. He just stayed neural. “Everything will be okay. Try to rest..”

Kelly walked over and was getting ready to sedate her but she stopped something in the voice didn’t seem right for someone who was having a mental break down. She had to make sure before sedating her even if it didn’t make any sense. This wasn’t Kelly making the decision but a professional doctor of Psychology. “Lillian, what did you just say? I want you to nod yes or no when I ask you some questions. She rattled off several questions and got the nods she was looking for. She shot a confused and unknowing stare at Ted.. “Ted She is coherent, so what she is saying must be true. I’m lost but there it is..

Ted didn’t need to hear another word from either of them. “Sis where was he the last time you seen him? Did he say where he was going or what he was doing to do? He switched places with Kelly as he took off to get dressed. He picked up the phone and called a buddy of his. He walked back into the room. Allen is going to have a few squad cars drive around looking for him, I will go as well. “We will find him Sis, I promise you. I love you.” he bend down and kissed her head once more than kissed his wife. Then took off to look for Scott.. He couldn’t believe this but when his wife told him she was coherent, then he believed his Sister that Scott was alive.

Kelly held her tight, “We got your message Sis, May I please sedate you, I promise it’s a heavier med, you will not dream” she was worried about all the stress that was crashing upon her. She already was so weak that a nervous break down was a high possibility. She almost didn’t want to ask but she did and now she had to wait and pray that she would let her. If she wouldn’t it might help her to talk about the return of Scott. So she waited for to decide.
 
She wasn't trying to make her brother feel bad, but the dream felt so very real that she didn't know what part happened and what part hadn't happened yet. She felt safe in her brothers arms and she knew she was safe with him and Kelly, she hated that she had shut them out. She needed him now more then ever, she lost Scott all over again. She had always been closer to her brother than anyone else in her family, tears filled her eyes at the way that she treated him.

She looked up at Kelly weakly as she shook in her brothers arms, she was greatful for this amazing woman that her brother had married. When he held her tighter her heart was pounding when he told her that he didn't hate her, but part of her didnt really believe him, and she wouldn't even blame him if he did hate her. When he told her he loved her, she believed him, she felt as if she didn't deserve his love.. She lost it a long time ago.

She didn't know where Scott ran off to, or if he was okay.. She hoped he went home.. She hoped he was safe even if he didn't love her anymore. She begged him not to make her leave his house. Her dreams felt so very real and she still felt like she was stuck in them still. She didn't deserve him.. She didn't deserve anyone. She looked at him softly when she heard his voice, she didn't feel like she deserved him one bit. Him or Kelly.

She felt so lost and so weak. She wanted to believe he wouldn't kick her out but all she was feeling right now that she deserved no-one. She weakly smiled. She panicked all over again when she thought of Scott out there alone. She knew he would never believe her, which if she was him she would not blame him at all, hell she was starting to wonder if this was all in her head. Ted wouldn't know where to find Scott if he wasn't home, only Lilly knew the few places he would go.

She knew he thought she was losing her mind and she thought she was losing her mind, maybe she was just dreaming of Scott all along. She heard his voice telling her it was ok, she looked weakly at her brother then at Kelly. "I'm sorry." She whispered, but she wasn't crazy. Please don't condescend me, she thought to herself...but who was she fooling, she wasn't even sure if seeing Scott wasn't just a figment of her imagination, then she touched her throat, no she definitely didn't dream or imagine that.

Rest! She couldn't rest, knowing Scott was out there, she couldn't handle losing him all over again. "I'm telling you the truth." She whispered softly. She looked at him and then at Kelly, both accesing her state of mind. She would do the same thing if she were them. "I said he's alive, Scott's alive." She Said fully alert. Lillian said okay to answering a series of questions that Kelly quickly threw out at her. She looked seriously at the both of them.

She needed to explain, but she was so weak and so tired she just didn't have the energy to try to explain. She saw the look in her brothers eyes, he believed her, wether he wanted to or not. She told him it was at her apartment. "He said he needed to get his head right, and mentioned a Josephine.. " Her voice trailed off as she answered his questions. She watched as he got off from the bed. She heard him on the phone, as she looked at Kelly softly.

When he walked back into the room, she looked up at him. She smiled weakly, they would not find Scott if he didn't want to be found, especially after what had happened at the apartment. She nodded her head gently at him. "Tell him that he didn't do me any harm.. But Ted.. I don't think you will find him.. " She didn't want to give him false hope. She looked gently at Kelly after he left. She looked at Kelly softly.

"No dreams you promise?" She asked weakly... "I don't, I Can't dream Kelly, in my dreams he's gone all over again and it is my fault he can't stand being near me... No dreams."
 
Kelly took Lillian’s hand into her own. “I allowed Ted to keep me out of this and for that I’m so sorry, but now I’m here and no-one is going to stand in front of me anymore. Her hand sweeps away a few strand of hair out of her eyes. She cupped Lillian’s face. “I promise there will be no dreams, but I want you to do something for me. Do you remember the fist day you saw him? Do you remember the fist time he touched your hand? Do you remember the first time he put his arm around you? I want you to think of every first time he did something to you, his fist laugh at a corny joke, I mean everything. Up to the day that he gave you that ring. Nothing beyond that just to that day and stop. Can you do this for me?

She knew if Lillian thinks of all the positive things that they had together the time period it takes the drug to take effect she will be in a state of tranquility a place it appears she hasn’t been in for a very long time. She pushed the needle into Lillian’s arm. “I want you to start thinking of those things now.” She whispered to her. She continued to hold her hand as she watched, She had the secondary counter drug ready incase Lillian couldn’t keep the good feeling alive. She didn’t want her to go into deep sleep with negative thoughts. Not cause she will dream, its just the mind is still a mystery and she wasn’t going to take any chances with this young lady.

Ted and Allen began a search grid around Lillian’s apartment the other officers were given vectors to start their searching. They were all informed that Scot was a POW and was to be handled with extreme caution. If the use of tasers is necessary than it was authorized. The search was on as everyone had their sectors to check and people to talk too. Ted looked over at Allen, “Thanks for this. It means a lot.” Allen just nodded.

Scott called Josephine asking her why was he released from her therapy when he wasn’t ok. He told her about his episode and what he did to Lilly. He wanted to know how to fix it so he could be with her again without worrying about hurting her. He loved her so much and wanted to be with her. He even told her how frail and sickly that Lilly was thinking that he was dead all this time. Josephine was confused about the notification of his death when he wasn’t dead. Scott could only say that it might have been a clerical error but he had his doubts about that. But he barked back about her trying to change the subject. He wanted to now how to fix this and still was waiting on why she released him. Her answer was cold, I was ordered to Scott and that’s all I know. I didn’t have a choice. I wouldn’t have released you at all. You have PTSD and only therapy and time will even have a slight chance of recovery It was a sickness that many vets suffer and still suffer years after the traumatic events.

“So your saying that Lilly is never going to be safe with me?” her response made his eyes water up.. “thanks Doc.” He lifted his head up and the tears fell. He might as well died over there for now Lilly will know he is alive but cant be with her. How could this have happened. There has to be away, someway he could be with her. He just had to keep looking and maybe one day he can come back to her.. Maybe… He had to get far away as possible so she wont come hunting for him.

No, he was going to fight this, he didn’t care if he had to have supervised visits with her so be it. He wasn’t going to run from the only thing that made him feel alive, something he loved with all of his heart. She didn’t give up on him even when he was dead to her, well he isn’t going to give up on them. He just had to get help and someone always had to be with them when they were together until he beat this problem of his… He headed back to her apartment on the way he worked on his speech to her .. Apologizing for his weakness…

He noticed the door wasn’t locked so he pushed it open slowly, “Lilly? Are you here?” he walked in and looked around that is when his eyes fell upon her note… She couldn’t stay here it remembered her of him. She was leaving.. She had left him.. He fell to the sofa and began to feel sick to his stomach. Once again he has destroyed her life.. It was just getting worse.. Maybe he should be dead …

It was late when he felt a pair of hands pulling him up and spinning him around. Metal cuffs were being put on his wrist. “Calm down Scott. This is Ted. Lillian’s brother. We are just protecting us and you with the cuffs. We have someone that wants to see you so desperately so lets take it easy and we will go see her now. My wife has sedated her she will be asleep till morning but we can arrange it for you to be in the same room with her. “Scott feeling a wash of relief come over him for now she was still his.. That was all that matter the rest they could work on… “Can someone stay with me I’m afraid something might happen again like earlier. He told them everything and Ted look over at him. Yeah, we can supervise you with her, don’t worry you will get to see her in the morning.

When the morning hours came he was sitting at the edge of her bed awaiting for his sleeping beauty to wake. His hands were cuffed in front of him and Ted had a taser on his side. But Scott was here with her…That’s all that mattered…
 
Lillian looked softly at Kelly weakly when she took her hand in her own. She smiled softly at her and her kind words and she squezzed her hand. "I don't deserve your kindness Kelly, your one of the only people that never told me to move on and I thank you for that, your much more than just my sister in law, I'm so sorry for pushing you away." She said fighting back tears. She looked at her when she moved loose strands of hair from her face.

Lillian looked at her when she cupped her face gently. "Your going to be a amazing mother some day." She said meaning every word. She listened carefully as Kelly explained what it was she wanted Lillian to do for her, she nodded her head that she would do as she asked. "I remember everything about Scott and I, I can do this for you.. Kelly don't let them hurt Scott please, he's been through something I don't know what but.. It wasn't good.. Don't let them treat him like a criminal." She asked softly.

She needed Kelly to make sure he would be safe. Lillian sighed when the needle was placed in her arm. She nodded her head and closed her eyes, she needed sleep or she would be no good for Scott. She held Kelly's hand tight, as her body started to feel more relaxed than it had in a very long time. She prayed she wouldn't dream about letting him down, or losing everyone she loved. She couldn't have been more grateful for Kelly than she was at this moment.

"Thank you." She mumbled softly as she slowly fell asleep. Before sleep she made Kelly promise Scott would be safe. In her sleep she first dreamed of that first dance.. She was standing at the punch bowl alone, when she felt a tap on the shoulder.. She remembered the words.. I know you don't know me, and I don't know if you are here with a date, but I don't care if you are, I had to take a chance, I just transferred here, and I have to tell you, you are the most beautiful girl, I have ever seen, would you please dance with me.

She blushed and even though she never met this boy, something about him made her say yes, and the moment he took her hand in his, she felt as if she had known him forever, and from that day on she was a goner. Then her dream flashed forward to the day they were walking in the park and they got caught in the rain, it wasn't long after they moved in together. She remembered them running back to the apartment, her sundress she wore clung to her body, as did his clothes, she remembered shivering as he let them into the house he quickly went and got her a towel.

She remembered him tucking a wet strand of hair behind her ear. She remembered how quiet the room became the only sound was there breathing. He then wrapped her in the towel, and smiled down at her. Again his words fluttered to her memory. Even drenched you are still the most beautiful woman in the world. She blushed as he leaned his forehead against hers, and she shivered again. You're freezing, he said pulling her closer to him.

So are you, she giggled. We need to get out of these wet clothes, she responded. He nodded in agreement. She remembered looking up into his eyes and leaning up to kiss him. She remembered the kiss growing more deep, and then remembered her hands going to the buttons of his shirt, as she slowly unbuttoned them, her eyes never leaving his own. She remembered the look in his own eyes, when he asked her if she was sure, they were still soaked, I'm sure she whispered.. Let's go get warm, she said as she let them to the bathroom and turned the hot water on in the shower.

She remembered him pulling the straps of her sundress down, and her breath caught in her throat. She remembered him kissing her lips, her cheeks, her neck and then they quickly removed one anothers clothes as he pulled her into the shower with him. She remembered the hot water on there cool skin, before he again asked her if she was sure, and she nodded her head yes. After the shower they spent the entire night making love.

Nothing had been sweeter than making love for him that first time. Everytime after that had been just as good, she loved giving Scott her submission in the bedroom, she loved trying and learning new things with him. She then dreamed of him asking for her hand in marriage.. She wasn't even aware he had intended to ask her father, but he was always so full of surprises. She smiled as she slept. So many sweet memories.

She was groggy when she woke the next morning, as her eyes tried to adjust to the light. She looked over and seen her love.. "Am I still dreaming" She asked. "If so please don't wake me up."
 
Scott walked into the bedroom after Ted’s reassuring nod that it was okay for him to go into the room. He looked over to the Deputy and nodded his respect to the man, as his hands were cuffed in front of him. Scott shot a glance over to Kelly whom was looking at him with a look of hope and inspiration. “Thank you.” Scott shot another glance at all of them before stepping into the room followed by Ted. Kelly walked up and grabbed Allan’s hand, “I owe you brother.” She reached up and kissed his cheek. “Anything for you Sis.” Allan responded warmly.

Scott stood for a few moments looking down at the most beautiful woman in the world. The one that captured his heart years ago and still makes him fall into a state of awe every time he looks upon her. She looked as if she was getting the best sleep she has had in years, so peaceful and at a calm, much better than the night before when she was having her dreams. He smiled with the warm wave that was flowing across his body, his eyes was savoring her beauty, her calm. God he loved her so much. “Lilly, I love you so much.” he whispered to her.

Slowly he took his place beside her, watching every breath she took, every twitch of her facial muscles made her nose twitch, which was so damn sexy, he had to swallow hard to rid his throat from the lump that was forming. “God your so beautiful.” he voiced outward to her. He wanted so badly to just scoop her up and cuddle her to him. To feel her body against his, to feel that warming love that always flowed from her body to his. There was nothing in the world he would rather have right now than this very moment. “I give you my word I will never leave or say that we need to part from one another again. I didn’t mean to hurt you mental or physically.” He was fighting the tears when he felt Ted’s hand on his shoulders, “Scott, She knows, You don’t have to bring it up to her, it will just make both of you go back to that moment, So that is all water under the bridge now, walk across it and move forward.” Scott nodded his understanding.

When Lilly began to wake and uttered her words Scott smiled again and slightly shook his head, “Why is it every time I come to see you, your sleeping?” He chuckled trying to do what Ted advised him to do. “Oh by the way since I made breakfast yesterday, its your turn!” He waited till she was more atone to what was going on before he lowered himself down and kissed her so gently. Then slightly pulled away to whisper.. “I love you.” His eyes gazing into hers.

“Ted, come out here, we will leave the door cracked open but lets give them some privacy.” Kelly’s voice was low and soft… Ted touched Scott’s shoulder and Scott nodded instantly acknowledging that he was stepping out for a few minutes.
 
Lillian vaugly heard voices as she was in and out of consciousness. She didn't want to wake up if he wasn't going to be there, she'd rather die than for him not to be there with her again. She couldn't deal with losing him all over again considering she had just gotten him back. She couldn't imagine what life was going to be like now, she scared him off once, what if that happened all over again, she knew she couldn't bare to be the one to cause him any kind of pain.

She hadn't slept so sound in god really knows how long. She knew it was only due to medication, but she didn't care, her body ached and she was tired and hungry. One would wonder about the family, her brother a doctor, her sister in law a psychiatrist, another a state trooper, her fiance a war hero, her parents one a doctor the other a lawyer and she was studying to be a vet, yes one ambitious family. She could feel people in the room with her.

She was still in her clothes she threw on the night before, and her hair was a mess she was sure. She smiled in her sleep, so many good dreams, so many good memories. She shifted a little bit in her sleep as if trying to get more comfortable. She didn't want to wake up from these dreams ever. She thought she heard Scott's voice, then resolved it was just in her dreams again. She wrinkled her nose as she slept.

She hoped like hell they would find him safe and sound. Again she heard what she thought was his voice, she wanted to wake up, but the medicine was working it's magic. She again shifted in her sleep. She hadn't really thought about what he must have went through and yet she didn't want to imagine it, cause she was sure it was hell. She dreamed again about just being in his arms and being safe. In her dreams there was no war, no pain just love.

Again there was that same familiar voice coming through her subconscious. She thought she heard his brothers voice as well. She was in and out of it, she wasn't sure what was real and what wasn't. Her eyes fluttered open and his face came into view. She knew he was real as she smiled at him. "Thank god your here." She whispered with a laugh. Once they were alone she looked at him more seriously. "You don't need to be cuffed Scott, your not going to hurt me, I don't want you cuffed like some animal.. Ted!"

She yelled for her brother demanding these cuffs to come off.
 
Scott reached out and touched Lilly’s arm. “Lilly the cuffs were my idea. I don’t want to have another incident like last night where I can hurt you. I could never live with myself if I hurt you.” he looked at her and hoped she would understand that it was for her own safety. “How are you so sure Lilly, I had you by the throat last night, what would have happened if I didn’t snap out of it?” Scott’s voice was riddled with fear. “I cant risk hurting you. The cuffs stay on.” He like crap by going against her wishes but her safety mattered more than her being a little upset with him.

Ted walked into the room as Lillian wanted for he had the key to release the cuffs. He was in between a rock and a hard place. “I don’t want to come between the two of you, but Scott I have to believe that there is nothing in this room that would trigger you like last night. We will be just on the other side of the door.” He wanted to help these two and he felt like Lillian on this matter. The cuffs was a little over board when there was three of them just on the other side of the door and him having a taser would be enough to stop Scott if necessary.

Scott exhaled deeply knowing that he would lose this situation with all of them siding with Lillian. He looked down to the floor trying to muster his nerve to allow them to remove the cuffs. “Okay,” he raised his hands up to allow Ted to remove them. He lowered his hands and looked at Lilly as Ted stepped back and walked out of the room.

“Okay, Now that we established a certain policy here. What now?” there was a hint of anger in his tone of voice but it quickly faded away as he reestablished the gaze upon Lilly. He look on her face told him why Ted didn’t want to intervene for the look upon her face was … Don’t Fuck with me about this… Scott smiled and chuckled… “You think your all tuff and bad don’t you?” He looked at her with that chuckling smile. “I do love you.. And yes I am scared of what happened last night happening again.” He reached over and took Lilly’s hand. “Please look at if from my point of view please.” He held up his hand in a surrender fashion. “Okay, Okay.. You win..”

“May we please talk about something else. We are walking really close to a line that I wish not to remember or discuss. We just need to move on.” He stood up and walked to the other side of the room. His head lowered and staring at the floor. “Are we going to be okay? “ he slowly turned and looked at her.. “I just want to come home..”
 
When he touched her arm gently she looked at him softly. She looked at him seriously when he mentioned that the cuffs were his idea, she didn't care she refused to let him live like a animal. She understood what he was saying, yet she didn't care, she couldn't bare to see him cuffed. She didn't think he could realy hurt her, it wasn't as if he had really even hurt her all that bad. She wanted nothing more than to understand, but she just couldn't.

She took a deep breath as her heart pounded against her chest, as she listened to his words. She bit her lip as she looked at him softly. She sat up a little more in the bed. She shook her head, but she couldn't find the words that she wanted to say. She understood why he felt the way he felt, but wasnt him being cuffed like a animal worse? She didn't hesitate to tell her brother to give her the key, or uncuffing him himself.

She looked at Ted sternly, her heart pounding once more, couldn't Scott see what him being locked up was doing to her, she didn't, no couldn't imagine what pain he must have gone through, but she knew eventually they would have to talk about it. She looked up over at her brother as he spoke to Scott. She couldn't thank her brother anymore, she owed him so much, she would thank him later when they were alone.

She looked at Scott waiting on his reaction. She knew he would not hurt her, she knew she was safe.. Worse come to worse and Kelly could sedate him if need be. She felt guilty, but she just couldn't stand to see him this way. She waited for what seemed like ever for his response. She was glad when he finally agreed. She smiled softly at him, thanking him with her eyes. She shook her head at his words, and they only made her feel more guilty.

She took a deep breath. She looked at Scott sternly as if to say don't try me. She could be just as stubborn as he could when she needed or wanted to be, now was one of those times, she smiled smugly and nodded her head that yes she did think she was tough. She looked tenderly and lovingly at him. "I won't have you cuffed like some kind of animal." She said fighting back her anger. "I trust you." She whispered as she looked into his eyes.

When he took her hand she squeezed his. "I understand where your coming from, trust me I do but I won't let you become some prisoner at home." She said softly. She smiled when he surrendered. "Thank you." She said softly. She nodded her head yes at the mention of talking about something else. She knew one day they would need to talk about it or they could never get through it. She watched him as he stood from his chair and walked to the other side of the room.

She felt so lost, as to what to do or say. "We will be okay.. I promise." She knew she was making a promise she wasn't sure she could keep. When he turned and looked at her, she sighed to herself he looked so unsure of himself of them. "I want you to come home." She whispered back and she stood from the bed and walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his waist, she didn't want to push him so she waited for him to his her back.
 
How did she know that he wouldn’t hurt her? She hasn’t seen him sense he was deployed and his special training taught him how to kill another human being, How in the hell can they compare him to then. His anger swelled for they wouldn’t listen to his warnings. Who would know more of what is going on in his head other than him! They didn’t want to be separated, but all he wanted was a sense of security being around her and if cuffs or someone in the room with them was the only way for them to be together what does it matter! She thinks this, being cuffed, is like being a caged animal, only if she knew what it was like over there. This here is like being in a damn cakewalk or a Sunday strolled down a scenic path.

He still looked forward when she came over and put her arms around his waist. The slightly heavier breathing was a small indicator that he wasn’t happy with what was occurring, but seemed to yield to it. His mind was racing trying to find the right answer that would end all of this but it just wasn’t there. He refused to put her in harms way and if she didn’t want the way he was willing to see her, than maybe, for her safety, they had to separate till he could be around her without the safety methods.

He was damned if he walk away for awhile for the pain was so intense, but the pain was even more when he realized he had her throat in his hands thinking that she was an enemy solider and was getting read to choke him to death. If he didn’t snap out of the episode he would have killed her. He couldn’t live with himself if he hurt her. It would be best to take the pain of walking away for awhile over killing her and never be able to be with her again. He just couldn’t do it…

The pain was coming back as his eyes watered up. “I cant..” He stepped away from her.. If no cuffs and someone in the room with us. I cant be with you right now. I just cant.” the tear feel , it wasn’t like he wanted this, it was something he had to do to make sure she was safe. “Kelly, I really do believe I need to be taken to the psychiatric ward in Bellevue.” He looked to her with the love that he had for her and hoped that the only reason why he is doing this is because he does lover her so much that he cant risk hurting her. “I’m sorry Lilly, I guess I am not home yet. Something is wrong with me and I need more help than a very loving fiancée.” He took another step away from her, “Please understand.” He moved toward the deputy and the doorway. “I wish to admit myself Kelly.”

Kelly looked at him then over to her for Scott just put her in between them, She closed her eyes for she knew what she had to do, “Officer, Please take this man into custody for he is a danger to himself and ….. Others.” She stepped in between Lillian and Scott for she knew she would try to get to him. She lipped to Lilly that she was sorry but this was the right move…
 
She knew when he was mad, she could always sense it, feel it, or see it in his eyes. She felt like she was pushing this all a bit to far, but she wanted him to know she trusted him and loved him with her entire being. She didn't know what to say or even what to feel at this point in time. She felt like a horrible person at this point in time, and maybe she was being a horrible person, none of this was fair. She knew just looking into his eyes he wasn't to happy with her, and she felt her resolve weaken, her heart started to ache.

She bit her lip, god what a fucking idiot she was. She was only making things worse for him, when all she wanted to do was be there for him, but a part of her felt as if he was pushing her away. She couldn't help but to hug him, she needed to at least touch him, even though she sensed his anger. She didn't say anything to him, but she could hear his heavy breathing. Maybe she wasn't the right person for him anymore, she just didn't know.

She wrinkled her nose as she fought back the tears that threatened to burst through at any time, she was tired of everyone seeing her cry, hell she was tired of crying so she refused to she had knew how to fake a smile and to hold back her tears. She looked at the floor and then up at him, and she knew, she knew she lost a part of him, but pushing her away she felt wasn't the right thing for him to do either, but what did she know she felt stupid and useless right now.

She shook her head, angry at him but knowing that was wrong, then felt angry with herself as well, what good was she if she couldn't help him, she wasnt enough to save him. She knew, she always knew when something was wrong with him, now was no exception. This was harder than him being dead she Thought, what if after all this time.. He just didn't want her anymore.. No she knew that wasn't the case, but at the same time she couldn't help If at the moment she felt like it was... She also for a moment wished her was the one that had died, she wanted to respect his wishes but at the same time it felt like her heart was being ripped from her chest.

She sighed, telling herself to calm down or she would just make the situation worse. She backed up a little when he didn't wrap his arms around her like she had expected him too. When she heard his voice, she felt that same familiar pain she had felt for so long. When he stepped away from her it was as if someone slapped her in the face. She looked around the room as If searching for all the answers when she knew there wasn't any.

She looked at him then at the floor defeated, fine you win she thought to herself. Hearing his words she knew she couldn't fight him on this, but she also knew she couldn't be there when they took him away. She couldn't say anything for If she did she knew she would break down and she had to keep it together somehow. His voice teared her apart. There it was she wasn't enough, not that it was his fault.. But still she felt that feeling of inadequacy once more.

When he stepped away from her, she felt as if she were what he had to get away from. She watched helplessly as he walked to the deputy. She looked at Kelly she couldn't blame her.

"Fine, you win okay you win, I get it.. But I won't watch them take you away. I need air.. Ted don't follow me... I.. Got to go. " She chocked slightly on her words as she ran from the house. She needed to be someplace else anywhere else.. This was worse.. Worse than him dying! She ran till she got to the one place that made her feel some sense of peace, and that was the highschool, she was glad it was the weekend nobody would be there. She sat on the steps and let her tears fall.
 
“Hey Guys, I’ll catch you all later.” Mike yelled at the disbanding group of men coming out of the High school gymnasium. The sound of scuttling rocks across the pavement could be heard as the figure headed toward the car, but the figure stopped and a voice called out. “Lillian?” a familiar voice that Lillian knew from her past broke the night’s silence. It was Mike, one of the men who were lucky enough to have a date with her during Scott’s session of being deceased. He was the better of the two that went out with her but the connection just wasn’t there.

He got close enough to see the swollen eyes and redness of her orbs. “Lillian are you okay?” he asked while moving to the step just down from her. He tuned sideways so that he could look at her during their conversation. His blond hair reflected the small light that hung just above the doors, his emerald orbs seemed to deft the dark and still sparkled. He didn’t want to intrude but he never did like seeing someone crying or have been crying for he always had to try and help, even if it was just to get a small smile from them. “Are you physically hurt?” he knew if he asked if she was hurt it would have been a personal question that even covered her soul, this way if she wished to talk it would be on her own terms.

He just sat there not talking anymore, not really looking at her but just sitting there in case she needed someone to yell at, he was here for that. He knew about Scott when they went out and he got the feeling that she couldn’t let him go and that was the same feeling he was getting now. He had to admire her love for him after all this time. “Hey, it’s really getting late and I can’t allow a lady to be sitting alone out here or even walking the streets to get home. May I give you a lift home?” He looked back down at the stairs not saying anything else to her. She would talk to him on her own terms if she wanted too.

The van came barreling down the parking lot toward the stairs and didn’t show any signs of slowing down. Mike stood up and moved in front of Lillian when the van came to a screeching stop. The side panel door opened and a rather large man jumped out. He was wearing an all black flight suit with a ski mask on. He pulled out a weapon. “Both of you get in the van now!” he voice boomed and he waved the gun at both of them, “NOW!” The man struck mike over the head as he was getting into the van, knocking him unconscious. The man turned toward Lillian and pulled out a hood. “Put it on.” the man demanded, “Then get your ass in the van.” came his hated voice …
 
What was she to do, she thought to herself, he didn't want her there, and no matter how much she wanted to be there... She wanted to respect his wishes, but she just wasn't sure how to do so, with being there. She placed her head in her hands god she wanted to scream. She snapped a little out of it when she heard a farmilar voice, it was kind and soft, and so not what she needed at the moment. It wasn't anyone's fault she felt this way, but she had just hoped to be alone.

She looked up, wishing she hadn't been crying, but she thought she was alone and just couldn't fight it anymore. Mike was a good guy, and stayed a good friend, the few times they ran into one another. She hated anyone seeing the weak side of her, but at the moment she really didn't care. When he asked if she was okay she had no idea how to answer the question, she wondered how many people heard the news of Scott being alive.

She looked gently over at mike but for a moment didn't say anything. She shook her head as if to say no she wasn't okay. He was always such a sweet guy and very good looking too, but he was no Scott. She wiped her eyes quickly, angrily wiping the tears from them. She told him no she was not physically hurt, though she thought to herself she wished she was hurt because mental and emotional pain was worse than any kind of physical pain.

She looked at him softly and gave him a little smile. "Thanks for stopping, and asking." She said sweetly. She was kind of grateful to have someone just sitting there with her in silence not prying to see if she was okay or not. "Thanks for sitting with me." She says in a little whisper. So far her brother hadn't gone looking for her, good she thought she just didn't want to face her family and all the questions they asked her.

When he asked if he could give her a ride home, she looked over at him, and smiled, she didn't live far and she was really tired so she was going to take him up on it. She stood up on the step. She nodded her head that yes she would like a ride home. She gasped at the way the van was coming towards them. She started to shake when Mike jumped in front of her. She noticed a large man jump out, as she grabbed mikes arm.

She was confused and had no idea what the hell was going on, she was holding her cardigan in her hand and dropped it from her shaking hands. She caught sight of his gun and froze. She shook her head no when the man told them to get into the van. She jumped at the tone of the man's voice, why would someone want to take them... Money it had to be, Mike had money she thought, well so did her family.. Her head was all over the place.

She shook her head when he hit Mike over the head she backed up some. "Mike!" She yelled. She tried backing up, but fear froze her into place, and she did as she was told, she had the gun pointed at her. Could this day get any fucking worse she thought to herself.
 
A thick set of fingers grabbed Lillian’s arms forcing them together as a wire was wrapped tightly around her wrists just before she is pushed backwards, her feet being forced together and tied as well. Soon the same bulking man was looking down at her with a rag balled up and being forced into her mouth. Another cloth was being tired around her mouth effectively gagging her. Mike was struck again and then tied up in the very same way. His limp body falling next to Lillian as the Van rumbled down a very rough and bumpy county road. She could hear the rocks bouncing up and hitting the frame of the Van.

Soon the Van was coming to a stop, When the drivers door opened the strong scent of evergreen and water filled the air. The breeze was cool and damp. Soon the side door clanked open and Mike was the first to be pulled out. The van door shut and silence took over the atmosphere of the van. It wasn’t very long before the door clanked back open and hands were grabbing Lillian’s feet and dragging her toward the door. The big man just grabbed her tired hands and pulled her over his shoulder and carried her effortlessly into a building. She could smell the scent of a fireplace and the scent of coffee could be faintly detected.

Soon she heard a door open and felt that she was being carried down a set of stairs. It was a few minutes when another door was opened and the man kept walking for another min or so before she could feel herself being put onto a bed. First her feet were spread apart and fastened to the end bed post, then her hands were untied and pulled to the other two headboard post and tied. The hood remained as she heard another body being dropped upon a bed and the same sounds of being tied filled the air.

Then the sounds of Mike moaning while the man’s footsteps were making their way up the stairs and the door being shut. The only sound left down where Lillian was tied up was the sound of Mike moaning in pain and discomfort.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

M
Her First Time
Replies
0
Views
255
mw_a1
M
JadeKnight
Sister's Return (Rebooted, closed)
Replies
22
Views
258
JadeKnight
JadeKnight
DarkWarrioress
4014 (closed for Themaddragon and Darkwarrioress)
Replies
4
Views
137
DarkWarrioress
DarkWarrioress
M
The New PA
Replies
0
Views
154
mw_a1
M
Dannyeight
Absolute freedom (Reserved for BF)
2 3
Replies
52
Views
1K
Dannyeight
Dannyeight
Back
Top