Help with a line in French?

[BlackShanglan]

I've been turning this one over and over in my head, and pondering between the various interpretations I have been offered:

...je m'offrais
Pour triomphe la faute idéale de roses.

The range of translations includes:

I gave myself for triumph the perfect sins of roses

I offered myself for triumph the ideal sin of roses

I gave myself for triumph the false ideal of roses

I confess, I rather love the idea of "the perfect sins of roses," but worry that my love of the image is undermining a faithful attention to the author's intent. Can anyone with a more sophisticated grasp of French aid me in identifying the best translation of the line? Or is the ambiguity intended in the original?

(The full text of the original can be found here: http://cage.ugent.be/~dc/Literature/Mallarme/Mal22.html. The stanza from which the line is taken follows.)

Aimai-je un rêve?
Mon doute, amas de nuit ancienne, s'achève
En maint rameau subtil, qui, demeuré les vrais
Bois même, prouve, hélas! que bien seul je m'offrais
Pour triomphe la faute idéale de roses.

 

[TheEarl]

I've been turning this one over and over in my head, and pondering between the various interpretations I have been offered:

...je m'offrais
Pour triomphe la faute idéale de roses.

The range of translations includes:

I gave myself for triumph the perfect sins of roses

I offered myself for triumph the ideal sin of roses

I gave myself for triumph the false ideal of roses

I confess, I rather love the idea of "the perfect sins of roses," but worry that my love of the image is undermining a faithful attention to the author's intent. Can anyone with a more sophisticated grasp of French aid me in identifying the best translation of the line? Or is the ambiguity intended in the original?

(The full text of the original can be found here: http://cage.ugent.be/~dc/Literature/Mallarme/Mal22.html. The stanza from which the line is taken follows.)

Aimai-je un rêve?
Mon doute, amas de nuit ancienne, s'achève
En maint rameau subtil, qui, demeuré les vrais
Bois même, prouve, hélas! que bien seul je m'offrais
Pour triomphe la faute idéale de roses.

I'd personally read it as: I offer myself up for the triumph of the false ideal of roses. However my French is a little rusty. That seems to be the most natural translation to me.

What're you reading?

The Earl

 

[BlackShanglan]

Interesting addition, Earl, and another that I also like. Damn those symbolists and their dense multiplication of meaning I will keep hoping; alas, the one person who springs immediately to mind as knowing enough French doesn't know sufficient English to discriminate perfectly between the offered translations.

It's Mallarme, "The Afternoon of a Faun."

Shanglan

 

[Svenskaflicka]

The thing about poetry is that you mustn't let accuracy get in the way of a beautiful flow of words. Use your artistic freedom, shangian!

 

[cantdog]

You can can the "false ideal," because faute is a noun. Sin, blame, fault. A "false ideal" would read idéal faux.

In fact, idéale is an adjective. So the faute is an ideal one, not the ideal a false one.

 

[oggbashan]

I showed this to my wife.

She thinks someone has made some errors in transcribing the text quoted because the lines quoted do not wholly make sense in French.

I will have to search to see if I can find a better version (if there are errors in transcription).

Og

 

[oggbashan]

Translation

SELECTED POETRY

SALUTATION
THE AFTERNOON OF A FAUN
ECOLOGUE
THE FAUN
These nymphs I would perpetuate.
So clear
Their light carnation, that it floats in the air
Heavy with tufted slumbers.
Was it a dream I loved?
My doubt, a heap of ancient night, is finishing
In many a subtle branch, which, left the true
Wood itself, proves, alas! that all alone I gave
Myself for triumph the ideal sin of roses.
Let me reflect . . .
if the girls of which you tell
Figure a wish of your fabulous senses!
Faun, the illusion escapes from the blue eyes
And cold, like a spring in tears, of the chaster one: But, the other, all sighs, do you say she contrasts
Like a breeze of hot day in your fleece!
But no! through the still, weary faintness
Choking with heat the fresh morn if it strives,
No water murmurs but what my flute pours
On the chord sprinkled thicket; and the sole wind
Prompt to exhale from my two pipes, before
It scatters the sound in a waterless shower,
Is, on the horizon's unwrinkled space,
The visible serene artificial breath
Of inspiration, which regains the sky.
Oh you, Sicilian shores of a calm marsh
That more than the suns my vanity havocs,
Silent beneath the flowers of sparks, RELATE
'That here I was cutting the hollow reeds tamed
By talent, when on the dull gold of the distant
Verdures dedicating their vines to the springs,
There waves an animal whiteness at rest:
And that to the prelude where the pipes first stir
This flight of swans, no! Naiads, flies
Or plunges . . .'
Inert, all burns in the fierce hour
Nor marks by what art all at once bolted
Too much hymen desired by who seeks the Ia:
Then shall I awake to the primitive fervour,
Straight and alone, 'neath antique floods of light,
Lilies and one of you all through my ingenuousness.
As well as this sweet nothing their lips purr,
The kiss, which a hush assures of the perfid ones,
My breast, though proofless, still attests a bite
Mysterious, due to some august tooth;
But enough! for confidant such mystery chose
The great double reed which one plays 'neath the blue:
Which, the cheek's trouble turning to itself
Dreams, in a solo long, we might amuse
Surrounding beauties by confusions false
Between themselves and our credulous song;
And to make, just as high as love modulates,
Die out of the everyday dream of a back
Or a pure flank followed by my curtained eyes,
An empty, sonorous, monotonous line.
Try then, instrument of flights, oh malign
Syrinx, to reflower by the lakes where you wait for me!
I, proud of my rumour, for long I will talk
Of goddesses; and by picturings idolatrous,
From their shades unloose yet more of their girdles:
So when of grapes the clearness I've sucked,
To banish regret by my ruse disavowed,
Laughing, I lift the empty bunch to the sky,
Blowing into its luminous skins and athirst
To be drunk, till the evening I keep looking through.
Oh nymphs, we diverse MEMORIES refill.
'My eye, piercing the reeds, shot at each immortal
Neck, which drowned its burning in the wave
With a cry of rage to the forest sky;
And the splendid bath of their hair disappears
In the shimmer and shuddering, oh diamonds!
I run, when, there at my feet, enlaced. lie
(hurt by the languor they taste to be two)
Girls sleeping amid their own casual arms;
them I seize, and not disentangling them, fly
To this thicket, hated by the frivilous shade,
Of roses drying up their scent in the sun
Where our delight may be like the day sun-consumed.'
I adore it, the anger of virgins, the wild
Delight of the sacred nude burden which slips
To escape from my hot lips drinking, as lightning
Flashes! the secret terror of the flesh:
From the feet of the cruel one to the heart of the timid
Who together lose an innocence, humid
With wild tears or less sorrowful vapours.
'My crime is that I, gay at conquering the treacherous
Fears, the dishevelled tangle divided
Of kisses, the gods kept so well commingled;
For before I could stifle my fiery laughter
In the happy recesses of one (while I kept
With a finger alone, that her feathery whiteness
Should be dyed by her sister's kindling desire,
The younger one, naive and without a blush)
When from my arms, undone by vague failing,
This pities the sob wherewith I was still drunk.'
Ah well, towards happiness others will lead me
With their tresses knotted to the horns of my brow:
You know, my passion, that purple and just ripe,
The pomegranates burst and murmur with bees;
And our blood, aflame for her who will take it,
Flows for all the eternal swarm of desire.
At the hour when this wood's dyed with gold and with ashes
A festival glows in the leafage extinguished:
Etna! 'tis amid you, visited by Venus
On your lava fields placing her candid feet,
When a sad stillness thunders wherein the flame dies.
I hold the queen!
O penalty sure . . .

No, but the soul
Void of word and my body weighed down
Succumb in the end to midday's proud silence:
No more, I must sleep, forgetting the outrage,
On the thirsty sand lying, and as I delight
Open my mouth to wine's potent star!
Adieu, both! I shall see the shade you became.
- translated by Roger Fry

 

[BlackShanglan]

You can can the "false ideal," because faute is a noun. Sin, blame, fault. A "false ideal" would read idéal faux.

In fact, idéale is an adjective. So the faute is an ideal one, not the ideal a false one.

Ah, bless you cantdog - that was the real stickler question in my head, and my French dictionary is in hiding. If I can be sure of which is noun and which modifier, I think that the rest can be let to float a bit.

Ogg - thank you for the English translation. I do have that one and a few others, but they differed on that line and I wanted to shake some sense out of them. I was relieved to hear someone else say that the syntax didn't seem to make perfect sense in French; that was my impression as well, but I was chalking it up to my own imperfect grasp of the language.

Merci all.

Shanglan