Help please - an age question

[Thomas Drablézien]

Hi

I hope that you can help me with a question about a story that I am working on. - It's a bit of an age thing - I am not trying to break or get around the '18' rule, but...

I use the words girl or girls frequently in the story in reference to the principal female characters. I do not state or imply any specific ages at any point other than repeated use of young woman / women. And the nature of the text does not allow for benchmark references such as high school, college, drivers licence etc. But I neither intend or imply that the 'girls' are 'under-age.' I think that the actions of the 'girls' should state loud and clear that they are all well experienced.

I have drafted a foot note for this story, directly addressing the reader, which reads, in part: '...and don’t take the word ‘girl’ too literally, I didn’t, they could be any age you want them to be."

My specific question here is does all the above in your considered opinions fall within the site guidelines?

I want to avoid putting on the 'All characters are over 18' disclaimer as I find that a little crass, and some how to my mind it implies that the author intends that they are not.

Cynical and jaded me!

Many thanks

Tom D

 

[evanslily]

Tom, if there's no other point of reference that might infer your characters are underage - and it sounds like you don't intend that any of them are - then I don't think you need a footnote of any kind. There is absolutely no need to put a 'all characters are over 18' disclaimer if it's clear from the text that they are.

In fact, to write a disclaimer like that one would actually have the opposite effect on me - that you really were thinking of your characters as underage when you wrote the story.

'Any age you want'? Nah, don't do it. I don't want to be reminded that some people out there might try to imagine that the female characters are children. That would make me feel uncomfortable right off the bat and would probably make me backclick before I even started reading.

Use of the word 'girls' does not in itself shout 'underage', don't worry.

 

[evanslily]

Double-posted - whoops

 

[Thomas Drablézien]

Thanks Lily,

You are right of course, I was having a bit of a panic. Just too many bad things happening in my life at the moment!

However there is just one line of speech in the story that might be taken as meaning under-age.

I qoute: “Mmm” she murmured, “That feel so good, big cock make Hanako feel so full. Hanako not little girl now, she proper woman just like other two.”

Ok it could be cut or edited but I really don't want to. That line is totally in character and, well I am biased I wrote it, it just fits in so well with the rest of the scene.

The foot note has gone, that part of it anyway, what remains has more relevance.

Thanks again

Tom

P.S. Just had another thought, I could just cut the word 'now' from that speech. It would still work for me and maybe kill the possible misinterpretation. - Mind you some people have even dirtier minds than me LOL

P.P.S (I must stop doing this!) I just edited out the 'now' and re-read in context. It actually makes more sense and works better like that! To quote the Iron Duke "Publish and be damned!" TD

 

[nerk]

My advice: submit.
If the editors kick it back for underage stuff, then worry about how to fix it.
If they don't, no sweat.
I ended up having to append a disclaimer to one of my stories, which annoyed me no end, since as evanslily pointed out, it immediately makes the reader assume the opposite, in true "protest too much, methinks" fashion. On the other hand, it was that or inserting some kind of explicit statement of age within the story. In the end, I wanted the story posted more than I wanted it posted without a disclaimer.

 

[CopperSkink]

In my very first submission, I purposely led the audience to believe (with the help of the antagonist) that a certain female wasn't old enough for legal purposes, and the site editor's bought it despite the two places I'd made it clear she was legal age or older. I resubmitted the same thing with a disclamer in three places, and it then went through fine.

Unless your story contains an actual age of a person engaging in or observing sexual activity (and apparantly getting married now) or a reference to the same, you can't get dinged.

Still, I think it's a bit edgy having "not little girl" because of the ay it still hints of underage even when it's saying otherwise. Something safer like "all grown up now" doesn't call back to a time when the character was younger.

 

[Thomas Drablézien]

Thanks for the replies,

Just to put things in a bit more context. As usually happens to me I get the idea for a story, or a starting point at least as with this one, then let it grow or not, (there is a pile of abandoned stuff on my hard drive!) in the writing.

I knew it was going to be a man and three 'girls' - group sex. The guy's character was easy, a variation on myself like most things that I write. But I was stuck for the girls - even when I write dirty I do like my characters to have character. I had set my location as Japan, or a fantasy version of Japan. So I researched Japanese girls names as my starting point. I found three names whose meanings suited my needs. Then built their physical descriptions and characters from there.

To come to the point. Hanako, which is the one who could cause the problem, literally means 'flower child'. So I describe her has being small and delicate. However, where I do give her small breasts I counter balance them with large nipples. - Womanly attribute #1? - And like both the other 'girls' she does have pubic hair, in fact I make special mention of it - Womanly attribute #2?

Next point, I have given Hanako a playful and childish - rather than child-like - character, but here again I make a point saying that her 'shy virgin' act, is just an act. She is also the one with the most to say for herself, and the words 'fuck' and 'cum' appear frequently in her speech. Mainly a series of monologues addressed to the male protagonist, which I have written all in pidgin.

Lastly when it comes to sex she is the one who initiates the actual fucking. And I have written her a well documented oriental method which takes months or even years of practice to perfect. And of course she performs it perfectly.

I like to think the reason for her exclamation is because the cock in the story is the biggest thing she has ever had in her pussy and certainly not because it is the first. But I would wouldn't I!

Actually, having just written this explanation I think that have now done away with any thoughts that Hanako could possibly be mistaken for a child, unless she herself wants us too.

Well I have now satisfied myself that my worries were unjustified. What do you think?

Tom

 

[sr71plt]

I think all disclaimers put on a story are a sign of perceived story weakness and highlight the issue for many who otherwise wouldn't even notice.

I have had "boy" and "girl" sprinkled in stories where it's otherwise established the character is of age and have never had a story rejected for these incidental mentions. If one is, it's just a three-day posting delay to resubmit the story with a note in the "notes" box that the story establishes that the character is over eighteen.

 

[Thomas Drablézien]

Problem Solved!

Hi again.

I had said to myself, that as I had finished the first full draft, I was going to let this story rest for a couple of days before I looked it over again.

But, having got my self thinking about it by starting this thread I couldn't let it lie! So I worked through it again this evening and have done some editing and tweaking. Apart from other bits and pieces, I reworked Hanako's second big speech. (Which is beside the point, but is a major part of the build up to the 'problem' one.) I have added SIX words to THAT one, so it now reads:

“Mmm” she murmured, “That feel so good, big cock make Hanako feel so full. Hanako not little girl like she pretend, she proper woman just like other two. You see now.”

The amendments are underlined only for the clarity of this quote.

Problem solved I think!

Thanks again to all of you for your input.

Tom