Help Me Last Longer

solmagic2

Virgin
Joined
Jan 17, 2004
Posts
25
Hello guys,

I need help lasting when having sex with my girl, I don't know what to do but nothing helps. I want to please her and also cum at the same time but it never happens.

What can I do?

Please and thanks
 
Well, according to psychologists all over the world, it's a psychological disorder. According to the DSM-IV (a book of psychological disorders), premature ejaculation is one. Of course, it's a bunch of bull shit, because years ago, so was homosexuality. Other than that, I can't help ya.
 
It usually takes quite a lot of practice to reach orgasm together. Practice of intercourse - AND practice with that particular partner. But at least its FUN practice......
 
crazybbwgirl said:
It usually takes quite a lot of practice to reach orgasm together. Practice of intercourse - AND practice with that particular partner. But at least its FUN practice......
I'd also add foreplay...lots and lots of foreplay on her behalf.
 
1) Masturbate before you see her or get off during the foreplay but awhile before you have sex (blowjob, handjob, etc.)

2) Use a condom (though you should be doing this anyway)

3) After doing 1 and 2, you can maybe try a little bit of anesthetic cream or one of those products with a name like "Stud", "Stay Hard", "Long Last" or the like (though the cream in the drugstore is a much cheaper option).

4) Relax. After you've been with her for awhile, it'll probably go away.
 
SweetErika said:
1) Masturbate before you see her or get off during the foreplay but awhile before you have sex (blowjob, handjob, etc.)

2) Use a condom (though you should be doing this anyway)

3) After doing 1 and 2, you can maybe try a little bit of anesthetic cream or one of those products with a name like "Stud", "Stay Hard", "Long Last" or the like (though the cream in the drugstore is a much cheaper option).

4) Relax. After you've been with her for awhile, it'll probably go away.

very good, but I'd stay away from the creams, they make you lose feeling or go a little numb and you want to build up a sort of tolerance, not - not be able to have a long round of sex w/o the creams.

Think about something else. Start doing math, think about laundry.
Have her tell you what she likes, use your hands, fingers, elbows... whatever it takes. Try reading stories from here to each other to figure out some fantasies, maybe even roleplay - get someone worked up enough and it could be a four minute session and you could be spent - or be ready for more in a short amount of time.

Have her get you off first, and then give her oral or anything else she asks for... after a little while you'll be ready to go.

You can do kegal excorsizes: Stop the flow of urine when you're going to the bathroom. Do this often to learn the muscle groups you need to find and flex... after you've figured this out... do it in 10 second intervals. It'll help you put a stop to you cumming once you've practiced enough.

Change of position. Her pussy will feel different, in different positions. Switch them, a 2-3 times during a session and find one that works best for you, and then find out how to make it better for her.

Buy a toy through the internet if you're too shy to go to a store, there are pleanty of suggestions also, in the Blank Manual, its a sticky at the top of this main forum page :)

PS: It also doesn't always happen for us. Us cumming... so don't feel like a falure. We're more complicated then you guys are... get used to it. ;) And before you think we're all the same - we aren't. If you get a new girlfriend, shes going to like sex/oral in a different way then your current girlfriend does.
Its a constant fun learning experience.

Try the thread by Mr.G "try this and report back."

::blows on the tops of her smoking guys::
NEXT! I'm in a helpful mood tonight hehe...
 
BlueSugar said:
::blows on the tops of her smoking guys::
NEXT! I'm in a helpful mood tonight hehe...

Watch out kids! She's smoking guys! wowwow lol
 
crazybbwgirl said:
Watch out kids! She's smoking guys! wowwow lol

_hijack_

:: bows and giggles ::
My name as taken over the first 5 threads or so... hehe

_end hijack_
 
I think the mental edge is very important, too. Keep your mind under control and don't think about "losing control." Close your eyes if seeing her moan and squirm in pleasure is too much for your senses. Instead of thinking about "don't cum don't cum" (which will only result in failure), think about "please her please her."

Don't be afraid to stop what you're doing and pull out for a little while. Go down on her or kiss her or get behind her and drive her wild. Also, change positions. I find that missionary and doggy style lead to quicker orgasms, so I switch up every few minutes. Get her on top of you and let her grind for a while.

Figure out which positions/angles/pressures on your equipment make you reach orgasm. Find ways to circumvent those until you're ready to cum.

And of course, keep in mind that you're the only man that can please her and that nobody can last as long as you can.

ETA:
I don't know if you're using condoms or not with your partner, but wearing one can drastically increase the time you can get dirty until you cum. Try slapping one on if you're not and you'll be surprised.
 
Or if your not afraid to do something a little illegal then try taking some MDMA before hand. But not too much otherwise you will never get there, and you'll want to dance around the room with fluffy pants on instead.
 
Xtacy said:
Or if your not afraid to do something a little illegal then try taking some MDMA before hand. But not too much otherwise you will never get there, and you'll want to dance around the room with fluffy pants on instead.

or lets not and say we didnt, because doing drugs are soooo fucking retarded.
 
My "tricks"

here are a couple of techniques I use (in addition to the excellent comments above):

1. Try to relax (this has to do with that kegal junks I believe). You know when you start to come how the muscle in your perineum squeezes and feels so damn good? Well you're probably doing that while having sex and you might not even notice. Just practice thrusting without flexing that. It's tough. It feels so right. :) But it's nice because once you control that a little better you can last longer while - get this - thinking about her instead of distracting yourself with baseball!

2. try not stimulating the head of the penis as much by using shallower thrusts when you're getting too close. Try to keep your breathing even as well. Just concentrate on that for a bit. Give yourself a break basically.

3. This is a little trick I rarely see listed, but it works really nice. If you're getting too close and you know you have to stop or come, then pull out slow, but instead of just waiting rub her clit with your penis. That way she won't lose momentum while you're recovering.

Finally the good news is this: Once you've held out for a while (15-20 min) you can usually hold out much more easily for longer in that very same session. ALSO if you do accidentally come after holding out you'll be ready to go and maybe even ultra-hard again within 5-10 minutes! Woo-Hoo! It's all very exciting.

Stay Strong!

-NED

Ps. Damn that was long for my first post. Sorry people. :heart: Much love!:heart:
 
When me and the GF first started having sex I actually had the opposite problem. I couldn't cum. It took a couple of weeks for me to be able to do that it. I think it was partly psychological, partly not knowing what worked best for both of us.

The only problem is that now I have to work to be able to last as long as I used to. :)

Don't get me wrong, I'm not exploding as soon as I slide in...but I like to be able to get her off too...and while I know she enjoys it whether she cums or not I'm vain enough to want to be able to get her there.

So...I've been working on it. Lately we haven't been using a condom because its that time of the month and it's safe to come inside her...which makes it that much more difficult for me to keep going.

So...I go until I start to feel close and then I slow down, or vary my thrusts to be shorter, I try to make sure that when I'm thrusting that I give her as much pressure on the pelvic area as possible to stimulate her clit. Having her on top works nicely because I can pull her hips down as I thrust in and really grind against her.

Doing that and stopping when I felt close, I still came before I was really ready, but because I had stopped it wasn't full fledged orgasm and I was still hard afterwards....so I did her ass too, which almost always gets her going.

Last night I held back for a good while, then pulled out and came on her back...that lack of stimulation and the fact that I'd been holding out for a while allowed me to stay hard again, so I just cleaned up thoroughly, slipped a condom on and slid back in. It was great because having come once I didn't have to worry so much about coming when I didn't intend to and I could concentrate on pleasing her. Which I did :)

I like the act more than the conclusion, not being able to cum only bothered me because it was unusual not because I missed it terribly. So being able to last longer is something I want to do both for myself and for her.
 
All great suggestions - and something's bound to work. But cumming doesn't mean that you have to give up on bringing her. Sometimes playing with a cum filled pussy will bring her off even stronger ... till you're ready for round 2.
 
was wondering if anyone knows if exercise levels like cardiovascular are a factor in lasting longer?
 
Little trick my ex used:

- Choose position where she is on top. She can then move more like rubbing herself against you. There will be less stimulation along your penis.

- If you think you are too close try thinking something else. Concentrate on moving your toes. Curl them, straighten them, curl, straighten etc. Takes your mind away from sex.

This combination made my ex last as long as he wanted. However I felt kind of bad him trying not to enjoy just to last longer. I liked much more to satisfy him first with hand or suck him during foreplay. Then he would completely concentrate on me until he felt ready to go on again. How fast guy comes seem to depend a lot from how long time ago they have come last time :)
 
I used to have this problem, and truth be told it was kinda bad too, like 5 minutes bad.

A few things i did made it alot better and im able to last an hour, take 5-10 minute break, and go on for another hour or two.

but it doesnt come easy... no pun intended.

I used to eat fast food alot, drink way too much, and didn't get out / get off my butt.


1. Cardivascular exorsizes are important. as well as maintaining a good diet.
Being in great health and feeling well about your self gives you a tremendous burst of energy and confidance.

This doesnt mean you have to turn into a 100% Health Nut.
Besides you should'nt eat fast food any way.
Read "Fast Food Nation"

Drinking and Smoking does also play a strong role in this too.
If you drink and smoke too much you will eventually get Whiskey Dick or Ash Dick and sex will be quick and she wont be too happy to see your hard penis frown.

You can try taking Horny Goat Weed, or pinching it off and all that crap but truth be told lasting longer is all about good physical/mental health.

2. Location, Location, Location.
No im not talking about where to stick it.

but the two of you should have sex.

Often times if you are a young couple at your house, or her house, and living with parents, the need to be quiet often times kills the mood, and killing the mood can lead to premature ejaculation due to the fact that you are so concentrated on not making a sound.

Go rent a hotel room, and ask them for a room down stairs toward the back parking lot, away from the street.
Get loud, Get roudy.

Or... if you want to get a little risky, go to a park at night, or the beach, but but beaches require a LARGE blanket because sand and blood are not lubricants!
 
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Lasting Longer

Man it sure is a bitch with me. Me and my girl have been having sex for over 2 years now and it was only recently she convinced me to have sex without a condom. (She is on the pill). Obviously, the feeling is around 50x better which is the problem.

She is my first and the love of my life so everything we do is always passionate and emotionally charged. So, the whole mentality of our skin touching in that region, the warmth, wet feeling etc is just far too much!!

With a condom, I've reached an hour on more than one occasion due to the lack of friction and sensitivity and also the "Durex Performa" condoms with the pro-longing gel inside do make a difference I think.

I think I might invest in some lubricants, or gels, etc that prolong climax if anyone can suggest some recommended types/brands?

We both agree we just need to practice more and more to desensitise myself more, but even then, I'm losing the whole sensitive feelin' which is so unbelievably amazing!

I guess I feel bad for my girl when I don't last that long but she's always satisfied due to getting her off a few times orally to begin with but I would like to last longer without having to contantly fight it...

Any good lubes, gels, oils I could try out?
 
Re: Lasting Longer

Different Guy said:
We both agree we just need to practice more and more to desensitise myself more, but even then, I'm losing the whole sensitive feelin' which is so unbelievably amazing!

How about masturbating before sex or asking her to give you a hand/blow job for starters? :) If you have come once already that day you will prolly last longer in intercourse without loosing any feeling. Would be double pleasure for you and nothing away from her...
 
Tried that but getting off with her then waiting to get ready again for sex is a bit frustrating as I never feel up for it and if I whack off at home first usually I'm all roaring for it again when I get there and lasts the same lol!!

I have done it tho and it can increase it yeah
 
We have ways to make you last longer

You know when you start to come how the muscle in your perineum squeezes

FalseNed has it absolutely right, this is the PC muscle, found between your scrotum and your anus. If you relax this muscle and keep it relaxed the whole time you will last much longer. Read about it in detail here:

www.infosex.com/pelvic-floor.htm

Another technique is to stop when you get your pregasm. This is the feeling you get just before orgasm. This makes sure you don't go over the edge... then you have more sex time to practice relaxing your pc muscle. Other techniques are Ajna Chakra focus (tantric sex) and slow breathing.
 
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