Help me decide.

[unpredictablebijou]

Temper assuaged, question answered in spades. Let's play.

Help me decide what sort of thread would get everyone thinking and talking about sex in a way that inspires them to then get offline and go write something really beautiful and good and hot.

That's a good question.

bijou

 

[Sara Crewe]

I don't want to speak for anyone else but I know I tend to hibernate and avoid this place when the personal whining and backstabbing moves to the forefront and the poetry becomes secondary to the drama. The good news is that the poetry always seems to win in the end.


Focus on the people you respect and enjoy and ignore the others.

And I do want to hear everything about last night. Every delicious detail. Please.

When I started the naughty poetry challenge it was suggested that maybe I recruit some judges from the Author's Hangout. So I went and started a thread asking for volunteers. One of the responses I got was this:

"
I gave up the PF&D forum for ... well ... forever, and I'm a much happier person now. Snarky elitism, even when not directed at me, pollutes the feng shui of my psyche. Pass.
"

Never mind the basic silliness of taking time to post this on the thread, when one could just as easily have simply moved on. That's something I've seen a lot and I find it ridiculous. But the real problem I had was that I wanted so much to argue with that idea, since I personally have been having wonderful and rewarding fun in the PF&D thread, meeting and interacting with cool people, TALKING ABOUT WRITING, which is why I'm here.

I didn't argue with her/him because I saw no point in trying to defend my rose-colored view of this group to someone who had already made a firm decision.

However.

I'm starting to get a little jaded. When the gibberish and snittiness starts to outweigh the actual useful discussions of writing, I start to really wonder if I should wander off.

Admittedly my patience is shorter today, so the rather bitchy PM I just got accusing me of a personal attack did not hit me at a good time for tolerance and compassion, but here's the question:

Is that writer indeed happier for having given up the "bad feng shui" of this place?

Please, someone, talk me out of leaving by showing me that actual meaningful things are happening in here.

If I get into a better mood, I will write a full report on taking all the naughty poetry to my bar last night. The evening was beyond my wildest dreams. It was an actual poetry convocation in a redneck bar, and it went on all night. I have some brilliant critique and some amazing stories.

If I feel like anyone here actually gives a shit what "real, regular people" think about poetry, and wants to continue to make writing a subject of discussion, I'd love to tell y'all all about last night. It was mind-blowing, beautiful, hilarious and real, and it was a fuck of a lot more satisfying than what's been going on in here lately.

Perhaps Pollyanna has left the building.

help me out here.

bijou

 

[wildsweetone]

bijou, it would help the atmosphere of the PD&F board if positives were brought here, and negatives left behind.

people grow and move on. that's life. this forum is great sometimes and a tad warped othertimes.

if you think it's time for you to move on, then feel free to do so. frankly, i enjoy reading your posts and will miss your input into this forum. however, if you start going the road of needing to be persuaded to stay here, then i would suggest you've lost your love of poetry and its creation thereof. continue being unique. continue being yourself. but please don't open a topic about what's great and what's bad about this place... there's plenty of threads in the archive already been done.

if you're feeling jaded, then ground yourself, friend. check out the threads here that pertain to poetry, that do not involve arguments or anything apart from poetry. there's plenty of threads and if you don't find one that suits your mood, start one. but keep it focused on poetry, please.

by the way, i know it sounds weird, but the separate boards of Litland tend to enjoy each other best when they're not rubbing shoulders. i don't know why that is. it just is. i suggest you don't go asking on the GB for newbies to come and vote either. same thing. quirky place this is. gotta love it.

as for your last night. please share. i'd love to hear what happened and how the poems were discussed.

 

[champagne1982]

When I sense something moving away from poetry, I tend to write poetry. I mean and post it too. Just a gentle ass kick can get the creative juices flowing.

We have our favourite posters and I've observed that when these voices go missing for brief moments then the dissentive arguments begin to surface and the horrid threads jump to the fore and tend to stay there until clever souls begin to tell us about their poetry evening in a redneck bar.

I can't wait to read what they thought about TFool's and my interchange on the Naughty Poetry Challenge thread. It should prove enlightening. DO TELL...

 

[Sara Crewe]

When I sense something moving away from poetry, I tend to write poetry. I mean and post it too. Just a gentle ass kick can get the creative juices flowing.

We have our favourite posters and I've observed that when these voices go missing for brief moments then the dissentive arguments begin to surface and the horrid threads jump to the fore and tend to stay there until clever souls begin to tell us about their poetry evening in a redneck bar.

I can't wait to read what they thought about TFool's and my interchange on the Naughty Poetry Challenge thread. It should prove enlightening. DO TELL...

I heard that they want to do a DVD.


Okay so I heard that in my head...but it still counts.


*soft building chant: Champ and Fool sittin' in a tree...s-u-c-k-i-n-g*

 

[champagne1982]

I heard that they want to do a DVD.


Okay so I heard that in my head...but it still counts.


*soft building chant: Champ and Fool sittin' in a tree...s-u-c-k-i-n-g*

It would be wicked to be spanked in a tree... I hope the bough breaks.. 'cause then I would be faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh-ling. How exciting!!

 

[Tzara]

Periodic waves of snarkiness invade this place (and the AH as well, as you well know). I think that is the nature of an Internet community. Somebody "says" (writes) something snotty or something that is misinterpreted as snotty, and people pick up their AK-47s and start shooting. It always dies down after a while.

We all react differently to these occasional flare-ups. Some people get really upset, others get angry, some of us just get depressed. It's never fun to watch people fight, unless it's on reality TV and money is at stake.

I get depressed about this place at times and toy with the idea of wandering off to better places. But basically I like the people here. Y'all are, by and large, smart, talented, funny, interesting people. And a lot of you write pretty good poetry. Plus I'm in love with all the women, but then I'm pretty simple that way.

People sometimes leave and I miss them (I am talking about you Calli and Fly). People sometimes come back after extended absences. I'd miss you if you left, as you are smart, funny, write good poetry, and I, uh, well, have that crush thing going for you.

Besides, who would I write Gerard Manley Hopkins parodies for if you left?

 

[Sara Crewe]

Plus I'm in love with all the women,

Heyyyyy, you told me that I was the only one!

*leaves in a jealous snit*



P.S. I miss Fly and Cali too. Good people and talented writers.

 

[champagne1982]

Heyyyyy, you told me that I was the only one!

*leaves in a jealous snit*



P.S. I miss Fly and Cali too. Good people and talented writers.

I'll bet we could email them and make them feel awful about leaving us.

We can share T-zed, it's not like we need him for longer than, say, an hour each.

 

[Tzara]

Heyyyyy, you told me that I was the only one!

*leaves in a jealous snit*



P.S. I miss Fly and Cali too. Good people and talented writers.

Mine is an undying but hardly exclusive love. Or hard-to-be exclusive love.

Something like that.

 

[Tzara]

I'll bet we could email them and make them feel awful about leaving us.

We can share T-zed, it's not like we need him for longer than, say, an hour each.

Gee, I hope five or six minutes will do. I am an older gentleman and my youthful stallion-like stamina is, alas, mere memory.

 

[The_Fool]

I wander where I please. Post where I wish. And try not to take Lit or the Litizens too seriously. I certainly don't take myself that seriously. I don't consider myself "poet" enough to be called a poet in the Poetry Board, I don't write enough prose to consider myself "writer" enough to be called a writer in the AH.

So that being said, I still enjoy the wordplay and playing with words so I come back. I post where I will and don't get caught up with those that take themselves too seriously. I'm not here to be everyone's friend, but I am not here to be anyone's enemy. Well...I will make a couple exceptions...on both threads. But standard practice is for me to ignore those people. That is ignore with a little i, not the big I, where you can no longer see their posts.

So....Bijou, what do YOU want from a forum? That is the question you need to ask yourself and whether you should choose to stay. Personally I find your ideas interesting and your post entertaining, so would like you to stick it out, but you aren't doing this for me.

 

[champagne1982]

Gee, I hope five or six minutes will do. I am an older gentleman and my youthful stallion-like stamina is, alas, mere memory.

We want you for more than stud m'dear. Intelligent conversation is more arousing than watching your penis bounce, I'm sure. Besides, six minutes is just off the average for actual service, yanow.

 

[Tzara]

We want you for more than stud m'dear. Intelligent conversation is more arousing than watching your penis bounce, I'm sure. Besides, six minutes is just off the average for actual service, yanow.

Whi... (cough, cough) whinny!

 

[champagne1982]

Whi... (cough, cough) whinny!

OK, that's enough horsin' around, now. Get in your halter! Who... (ahem) whoa...

 

[unpredictablebijou]

So....Bijou, what do YOU want from a forum? That is the question you need to ask yourself and whether you should choose to stay. Personally I find your ideas interesting and your post entertaining, so would like you to stick it out, but you aren't doing this for me.

That is an excellent question and I've seen the answer in here. Thank you. See, I'm smart enough not to put individuals on pedestals, but I tend to still put groups there, and this group is SO on a pedestal for me now, as a culture, as My People, as the bunch of weirdos I've been looking for for ages.

I have not lost any love of poetry, and in fact it's my absolute adoration of wordsmithing that led me here and keeps me here. And what I want in a forum is what has for the most part been going on here - hilarity, exchange of ideas, mad fun flirtation, mutual admiration of everybody and everything in the world, and a genuine common love for words and what they can do, and sex and what it can do. Y'all are precious people and I talk about you a lot.

I will indeed write about what happened at the bar last night. It may take several installments, because everyone's work got a great deal of highly intelligent critique, and it was absolutely mind-blowing to watch. I'm rather intimidated trying to describe it, but I will do my best.

It was a bit of a dark afternoon. In the middle of a day at the shop when I felt like I was being attacked by cheese graters on all sides (yes, even in this lovely business it happens) I get this amazingly snitty PM that really sent me over the edge. I've been incredibly diligent about avoiding the conflict, and while this is my first Poetry Forum, it's not my first experience with internet conversation and the sort of tsunamis that blow up for silly reasons. I've seen it and seen it, which is why today all of a sudden I felt so sad. I have such immense hope and faith in this tiny, silly subculture of the pf&d.

Dammit, this place is full of humans. I hate that. Please do your best to allow me to continue to think of you as a pantheon of most fascinating deities. It's so much sweeter that way. And really, it's not that hard most days. You are, really, a stunning bunch. And I've met stunning bunches before, so I know what I'm talking about.

I'm going to have a therapy night and Get Over My Cheap Self, as we say around here, and then I'm going to write about the Redneck Poetry Convocation, and you're all going to be so proud of yourselves...


thank you. really and truly. I will endeavor not to be a Drama Queen any more.

bijou

 

[Tzara]

When I started the naughty poetry challenge it was suggested that maybe I recruit some judges from the Author's Hangout. So I went and started a thread asking for volunteers. One of the responses I got was this:

"
I gave up the PF&D forum for ... well ... forever, and I'm a much happier person now. Snarky elitism, even when not directed at me, pollutes the feng shui of my psyche. Pass.
"

Yes, I'm snarky and elitist
but I'm also quite defeatist
'cuz my poetry's ennui·ist-
i·cal·lic·ly all wrong.

I'm stupid with my metaphors.
My similes? Ah, oui, encore!
Unhappily, my poem's bore
my Mom, my Dad, King Kong.

My work is so incompetent
my time would be thus better spent
in politics, reducing rent
for innerciteans.

But artist am I! Bold and brash.
Kick lesser artistes in their ass.
I write with verve and flair and sass
for critics to then pee on.

So elite on, my fellow snarks!
Bad poems we chew on like grouped sharks.
Our feng shui's skewed. Shred poems as lark.
Save mine. Write only paean.

 

[Eluard]

When I first arrived here my intention was simply to post some poetry with the thought that there might be some people who would like it — and to read others that I also liked. But I’ve been in poetry groups for many years and I knew that they can get pretty psychotic. My intention here, and there, was simply to ignore those I had nothing in common with, and talk to the others. But some people don’t want this. They have made this forum their personal middle-aged/teenage flirting ground: they post a negligible amount of poetry, but post regularly, keeping up the badinage and the ho-hum jokes and the silly, tedious flirting. And all of that is fine by me — if that is what you want to do then you go do it. But then I noticed that I was being side-swiped by one of these characters. Not addressed directly, but clearly being referred to in posts to others that I was meant to read. (Tathagata — I’m talking about you, in case it’s hard to recognise yourself.) I ignored it the first time, and the second time — but eventually, at the n-th time, I got pissed off by this passive aggressive shit. So I responded, because if someone wants to pick a fight with me, then I will fucking fight them. Of course to anyone not following the trail of provocation-crumbs it might look as though this came out of the blue — but it didn’t. I tried to be nice, repeatedly, but some people don’t get nice: in their pathetic, panicky determination to flirt with every woman around nice just looks weak, looks like it can be elboed aside.

The trouble with this forum — which is the problem with this site as a whole — is that for a few people this place is just a chat-room, a way of giving them the frisson of sex with no actual contact. I say again, I’ve got nothing against that. But for others this is a place of literature posting and literatute discussion, and the problems occur when the two get mixed in together, when the flirtation determines what you say about this or that matter of poetry, how quick you are to ignore what someone is saying to make yourself seem like the active poet you clearly aren’t.

(Let me explicitly make a contrast with The Fool, who I have never exchanged a cross word with, but who has never once tried to provoke me. We live and let live.)

Personally I don’t think that “you people raaawwwkk” and I don’t think “you’re haaawtttt”. But I’m reluctant to give up on the few people I like for the few that I don’t. Maybe this thread should just be a call to order.

And I’ll add this: Bijou, I’m very surprised at your outburst here. Nobody, absolutely nobody, has been cosseted and flattered and praised and flirted with and made a fuss of in the way you have been here. It has been a thing to see. So to complain like this is a mite shameful. Imagine if you'd had to put up with some of the things the rest of us have.

note: this was written before I'd seen your post #16.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Eluard, my darling, my doll,

this is SO not the thread to pick fights. Not with me, not with anyone. Prove me wrong. I'm begging you. Just go read the damn naughty poetry update and then go write something. You're in it, even. You'll like it. No more. Please. I fucking hate conflict. It's boring. And as to flirting, I intend to continue. A lot. The other half of this board is sex. I take that quite seriously. Teach classes, even. I think it belongs here. I think it's inspiring and beautiful.

Remember, I've seen you in a jesus outfit covered with key lime pie, my dearest. Come down and have some more fun.

bj

 

[Eluard]

Eluard, my darling, my doll,

this is SO not the thread to pick fights. Not with me, not with anyone. Prove me wrong. I'm begging you. Just go read the damn naughty poetry update and then go write something. You're in it, even. You'll like it. No more. Please. I fucking hate conflict. It's boring. And as to flirting, I intend to continue. A lot. The other half of this board is sex. I take that quite seriously. Teach classes, even. I think it belongs here. I think it's inspiring and beautiful.

Remember, I've seen you in a jesus outfit covered with key lime pie, my dearest. Come down and have some more fun.

bj

It wasn't my intention to pick a fight, with you or anyone else. And I'm fine with flirting, as i've said. But you asked a question on this thread and it needed to be answered. There are problems in this forum and they need to be talked about: people are getting pushed away all the time here. It's not necessary.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

I am still here. Not driven away. I'm keeping it.

Have some pie, and let's talk about writing. Your piece got a LOT of attention last night. More on that later.

off to cause trouble downtown.

bijou

 

[The_Fool]

Just for the record. Drama Queens are kind of fun. As long as I don't have to take one home...

 

[Eluard]

Just for the record. Drama Queens are kind of fun. As long as I don't have to take one home...

You bastard — I take back what I said about you.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Just for the record. Drama Queens are kind of fun. As long as I don't have to take one home...

How bout Drama Queens who promise to leave before dawn?

bj

 

[EriAliSaa]

I wanted to say something insightful about the ways of those on the internet.... or at least make a glib remark that would hopefully make you smile. But there is not a lot that can be said.

Frankly, it is really not that important what is said here. Peoples opinions, their insights, and biases shouldn't effect you on your everyday life. There is nothing to get upset about here as long as it doesn't effect your everyday real life.

You can have fun. Find insight that helps you see life differently, get help, and even have a fun erotic time on lit. But board wars are actually funny. There is a quip that my husband uses when he is exasperated with with this or that fad. He will make whatever comment he is going to make and finish with "fuckin dumbass fanboys!" He really loathes people that spend lots of money to advertise for say.... Nike on their car and clothes.

A message board, a game, a chat, or any other interactive activity, doesn't any character or personality that its participants don't imbue it with. The soul and feel of anything interactive is all about the participation. There are experiences that you will never experience again because.... what is the saying? You can't catch lightning in a bottle?

Let us say that everything that whoever said about this board is all true. So what does that change from before they said whatever it is that they said? Does it change the experiences you have already had?

Lit and this board is what it is and will be what you make of it and everyones contribution to it. It has been what people have imbued it with in the past and will be what people will imbue it with in the future.

Attack one thing or defending another is just being a fanboy. If you need incentive to socialize on a message board, you need to rethink your priorities.