Hello.

[Ishmael]

"Hello Mr ____________, I'm XXX calling on behalf of the United Negro Education Fuch."

"And?"

"As you know a mind is a terrible thing to waste so we're calling to solicit you financial support for out mission."

OK, but you only want to save the world from the waste of a mind associated with a black body, right?"

"Well no sir, we support those of mixed blood too."

"So 'one drop of white' doesn't disqualify the potential candidates?"

"No way, we don't discriminate!!"

"So exceptional white students get the nod then."

"Well, not exactly sir, after all we are the United Negro College Fund!"

"At least it's gratifying to know that 'one drop of white' won't cause you to discriminate."

"So we can count on your support then?"

"Well, not exactly. I figure it'd time to start the United White Folk College Fund. Only "Fair" ya know?"

"You racist bastard, I'm notifying our attorneys."

"Way to close the donation deal sparky."

Ishmael

 

[unregistered]

 

[ChinaBandit]

Did you see where Pat Buchanan got canned by daring to write about the decline of White America?

Meanwhile, Media Matters operates with impunity.

 

[unregistered]

 

[MeeMie]

Meanwhile, Media Matters operates with impunity.

... as well as with a tax exempt status

... whereas

http://www.weeklystandard.com/blogs...hmond-tea-party-tax-exempt-status_629931.html

 

[Spinaroonie]

I'm sure this conversation really happened!!!!!!




IN REAL LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





PERSON TO PERSON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!






It's not just somebody being tough on the internet!!!!!!!!!

 

[Honey123]

You know..on sort of the same topic. I received a phone call the other day which went like this:

"Mrs. ____. This is Bob from ___Bank. Can I have the last four digits of your social security number?"

"What is this about?"

"I can't tell you until I have your last four digits of your social"

"Uhm. You are not getting my social security number."

"Ma'am. It's only the last four."

"And you're still not getting them. What is this about?"

"I have to confirm that you are Mrs. _____"

"I am."

"But I need your social."

"Bob, how would you like it if I called you up and asked for yours? Would you give it to me?"

"No."

"Ok then. I think the protocol of your bank needs to change. Since you could be just about anyone."

He then proceeds to give me a number, to which I then said, "how would I know this is not some number you are giving me?"

Eventually we ended the call by me advising that I was going to call that bank and see what they are doing.

I did and the woman who answered said that they had been receiving a number of calls about that. I told her that they need to change this protocol because in this day and age where identity theft is prevalent it is quite ridiculous that they are allowing that department to continue asking for something like that without an explanation as to what they are calling about.

 

[semen4her]

Ish feels that blacks do, and always have had a fair shot at success in America.

 

[warrior queen]

"Good evening, Ms xxx, this is Michael calling from Microsoft. We have identified a serious threat to your home computer."

"Really! Oh no!"

"Yes. I'm afraid it's quite serious indeed. But we can help you repair your computer from here if you give us x information." (I can't remember exactly what he asked for.)

"Right. Well, explain to me exactly how you can do that."

"I'm sorry, Madam, what?"

"I'd like to know the precise steps you take to do that, please?"

"Pardon me, Madam, but we are not allowed to tell you how we do this. Company policy."

"I see. So I give you x, and you just fiddle around from there, is that it? Um, could you tell me where you are then?"

"Pardon?"

"Can you tell me where you're calling me from? As in, which office of Microsoft you are in?"

"I am calling you from the Technical Department of Microsoft."

"Yes, you already said that. What I want to know is which office, in which city, you are calling from. Surely you're able to tell me that?"

"Well, madam, I am calling from the Technical Department of Microsoft Corporation, and we received notification that your computer was in very serious danger, and would like to help you."

"Right. Let's move on to an easier question..."

"Pardon?"

"Now, I'd like to know how Microsoft can fix an issue on an Apple computer for me?"

"What?"

"Would you like me to repeat that?"

'click'

 

[hobbit.]

Subject: HELP ME TO SPREAD GOODNESS


My beloved,

It is my pleasure to contact you for a business venture which I intend to establish in your country.Though I have not met with you before but I believe, one has to risk confiding in someone to succeed sometimes in life.

There is this amount of FIFTEEN Million US Dollars which my Father deposited with a security company which he wanted to used for his political ambition in our Country before he was kidnapped and killed by unknown gun men. Hence my father and mother is dead, I do not have any other hope rather than this funds which is why I contacted you.

Now I have decided to invest these money in your country or any where safe enough outside Africa for security and political reasons. I only give all praises to God who made every thing to be like this, my father is gone, I can count you as my father if you wish to be a Daddy to me. [Pass the sickbag]

Hence this investment shall be made in your company upon your withdrawal of the consignment, I do not have money to work on this and will commit suicide and die [And die? Suicide just isn't good enough these days] if I cannot secure my late father's treasure which he got for his family.

I want you to help us claim and receive the consignment which will be sent to you through diplomatic means to your address to avoid any traces of the funds and to enable you plan for the investment in your Country.

I will like to invest part of the money into these three investment in your Country but, if there is any other business that is better than my suggestion, I will be very glad to follow your advice.

1). Real estate
2). The transport industry
3). Five star hotel

If you can be of an assistance to me, I will be pleased to offer to you 20% Of the total fund while the balance will be invested by you. I need your understanding and honesty to this project, I assure you to always be your brother.

I await your soonest response.

Respectfully yours,

Miss Jani Adams

 

[hobbit.]

A better one.. (from 419eater.com, well worth a look)

TITLE: Wanted: Dead or Dead
SCAMMER NAME: Tommy Mark/Lewis Seth
SCAMMER LOCATION: Republic of Benin
SCAMBAITER: Shiver Metimbers

From: Tommy Mark
To: Arthur Dent
Date: February 25, 2006
Subject: Puppy for sale

my is clement i am from barrytown(new york) but due to work presntly i was just been transfered about couple of days for a missionary purpose in west africa.right now i am still located in republic of benin where am carrying out my missionary assignment and due to tight assignment i found myself i don't have much time to take good care of my puppy like i use to,and so also the environment that the puppy found her self here in republic of benin is too harsh. therefore have decided to give out the puppy to a good caring person that would treat my puppy with a tender care and a well family interraction.

the puppy is well breed and the puppy has a current vaccination,vet exams,health certificate and 1year guarantee.the puppy has potty trained,home raise and socialized for tremendious attitude.well and excellent temparamented.the puppy has super trainability and people pleasing personality.the puppy is given a high learning a delight elegance of structure and well dewormed.the dog has C.K.C,A.K.C and F.C.I Registered.am offering the puppy out at $650 each one including the shipment.and i have attack the pics of my puppy, and i will like to attach the pic of mine self.

i will like to hear from you as soon as possible.Thanks AND GOD BLESS.

reply-
From: Arthur Dent
To: Tommy Mark
Date: February 25, 2006

How much will it cost for you to kill the puppies and send the fresh meat to me?

Sincerely,

Arthur Dent
Director
Klingon Meat Trading

reply-
From: Tommy Mark
To: Arthur Dent
Date: February 26, 2006
Subject: Re: Puppy for sale

THANKS FOR YOUR MAIL

I DO NOT KILL PUPPY I ONLY SELL DUE TO I ON A TRANSFER LIVE OUTSIDE UNITED STATE THAT IS WHY I WANT TO SELL OUT MINE PET FOR A CHRISTIAN PERSON THAT WILL TAKE HER AS A DAUGHTER SO ARE YOU WILLING TO BUY A LIVING PUPPY?

THANKS AND REMAIN BLESS.

reply-
From: Arthur Dent
To: Tommy Mark
Date: February 26, 2006

I only deal in dead dogs, sorry. It costs more to import them alive.

I own an exotic food importation company specialising in Klingon foodstuffs. We usually pay between $2,000 to $3,500 per kilo for fresh dog meat, antelope meat, tribble meat and also, Mogwai meat.

Thank you for your contact and I am sorry you cannot help me at this time.

Arthur Dent
Director
Klingon Meat Trading

reply-
From: Tommy Mark
To: Arthur Dent
Date: February 26, 2006
Subject: Re: Puppy for sale

THANKS FOR THAT

WE HAVE DOG MEAT AND THEY ARE READLY FOR SALE BUT I CAN STILL TELL YOU FLLOW WORKER THAT I HAVE SEE THE PERSON THAT IS READLY TO BUY THE MEAT BUT UT IS TOO COSTLY AND IT CAN BE SHIPPED TO YOU COUNTRY THAT IS IF YOU ARE WILL WILLING TO PAY FOR IT.

RERPLY AS SOON AS POSSIBLE,

THANKS AND REMAIN BLESSEDFrom: Tommy Mark
To: Arthur Dent
Date: February 26, 2006
Subject: Re: Puppy for sale

THANKS FOR THAT

WE HAVE DOG MEAT AND THEY ARE READLY FOR SALE BUT I CAN STILL TELL YOU FLLOW WORKER THAT I HAVE SEE THE PERSON THAT IS READLY TO BUY THE MEAT BUT UT IS TOO COSTLY AND IT CAN BE SHIPPED TO YOU COUNTRY THAT IS IF YOU ARE WILL WILLING TO PAY FOR IT.

RERPLY AS SOON AS POSSIBLE,

THANKS AND REMAIN BLESSED

reply
From: Arthur Dent
To: Tommy Mark
Date: February 26, 2006

Do you have dealers who also specialise in Mogwai meat? I recently lost my usual supplier and am in desperate need of a new and reliable supplier. Typically for good quality imported Mogwai meat my company pay $2,700 per kilo (that is for the smoked Mogwai meat). I would be very interested in importing regular supplies if you are able to arrange this.

Get back to me with more information and prices if possible and let me know a list of the different type of meats you can export to me.

Arthur Dent.
Director
Klingon Trading Ltd.

reply-
From: Tommy Mark
To: Arthur Dent
Date: February 26, 2006
Subject: Re: Puppy for sale

Yes i have a dealer who specialised in Mogwai meat,i spoke to him concerning supplying your company as you request.He export the smoke and unsmoke mogwai meat at the rate of $2,550 per kilos.

He has different kind of meats he export to its customers.

Reply as soon as possible

Thanks and God Bless.

reply-
From: Arthur Dent
To: Tommy Mark
Date: February 28, 2006

Dear Mr. Clement,

My apologies for the slight delay in replying to you. I have been meeting with a prospective client in Xanadu and only returned to my office a short while ago.

I would be very interested indeed in purchasing regular supplies of Mogwai meat however as your dealer will of course know I will require an exportation certificate from the country of origin, and medical 'fit for consumption' certificate which shows the Mogwai meat is fit for human consumption. Without such certificates I will not be allowed to import them in the UK. If your supplier is able to provide me with these certificates then I see no reason why we cannot do much business together. For my first order I would be prepared to take 95 kilos.

Please get back to me as soon as possible, also please give me your prices on the puppy meat that you said you could get for me.

Sincerely.

Arthur Dent
Director
Klingon Trading



It gets better.. have a look on http://www.419eater.com/index.php

 

[Sean]

419 eater is genius. I love that bloke.

 

[hobbit.]

419 eater is genius. I love that bloke.

in a none gay way i hope!