Have you lost weight lately?

[human_male]

Would it be considered rude to say that to a woman, who is only an acquaintance? I'm looking for a way to break the ice and flirt with her a bit. Would she take that as a compliment or be offended?

She has actually lost weight I think.

And she's married if that makes any difference.

Many thanks.

 

[SpecialKay62]

All depends...

on how the planets are lined up on the particular day you choose to say that! I wouldn't, even if her clothes were falling off!

However, I would say something like: "Wow. You look really great lately, what's different about you?" Acknowledgment without commitment/judgment. Good luck!

 

[Kitty_Schrödinger]

Never talk to a woman about her weight. Never!

 

[cryforme1v]

on how the planets are lined up on the particular day you choose to say that! I wouldn't, even if her clothes were falling off!

However, I would say something like: "Wow. You look really great lately, what's different about you?" Acknowledgment without commitment/judgment. Good luck!

i agree with Kay on this one. Acknowledgement without judgement. If you say "wow have you lost weight?" she would more than likely take it as an insult, even more so if she hadnt.
Never mention a womans weight, no matter how much you know her.

 

[LaRocha]

Would it be considered rude to say that to a woman, who is only an acquaintance? I'm looking for a way to break the ice and flirt with her a bit. Would she take that as a compliment or be offended?

She has actually lost weight I think.

And she's married if that makes any difference.

Many thanks.

Complimenting a married woman's body isn't a good way to break the ice. Compliment an article of clothing, accessory, something that doesn't make you sound like a gay or super perv.

 

[TypicalDeviant]

I'll echo LaRocha. If you told my fiancee that she had a great body, depending on who you were, I might go Bull Ape Alpha Male on you.

However, nice earrings/necklace/dress should do just fine

 

[fuckmeat]

You don't have to risk being as specific as that. Mentioning anybody's weight is risky. You can just say she's looking 'great' or 'really well.' Don't be flirty unless she appears pleased and flattered, opens up and starts chatting. If you do flirt, try not to be obvious because if she doesn't like being flirted with, it might damage the prospect of becoming closer friends in the future. Be led completely by her responses and if you're in any doubt, back the fuck down. Flirting is something you can initiate gradually, over a number of meetings. She may well need to reassure herself that you're not looking for anything more than banter from you (so you better not be) but once she feels safe chatting flirtatiously with you, it should become easier and more frequent.

 

[cowslinger64]

"Your workout regimen is really paying off, keep up the good work" will light up a woman's face. I know, cause I've used it.

I agree that you need to be careful what you say...really cause of the way women think. Tell one you look great today, and you might just hear "why, did I look bad yesterday"????


lol..

 

[human_male]

I think I'll try "You look well." And if that seems to go well "Have you been working out, lately you've been glowing?"

I've been wanting to try being more flirty with women because not being flirty and just taking my time and trying to get to know them in a friendly manner has got me absolutely nowhere my entire life. So I thought I might as well try being more forward and flirty and see how that goes. I've got nothing to lose, if I blow it with them it's not like I would have got anywhere taking it slow like I've always done (did I mention that has got me nowhere?).

But I obviously don't want to offend them or (even worse) freak them out or make them uncomfortable around me though, so thanks for the advice.

Another thing I've been wondering about is "your hair is doing a lot for you." How would that go? Could I use that as a quick compliment with an acquaintance or even someone I've just met (if it's sincere that is)?

 

[fuckmeat]

Hmmm... at the risk of being nitpicky, complimenting a woman on her hair may leave her wondering if you're homosexual. Most het guys (IME anyway) just don't notice that stuff. Keep it non-specific to be safe.

 

[human_male]

Hmmm... at the risk of being nitpicky, complimenting a woman on her hair may leave her wondering if you're homosexual. Most het guys (IME anyway) just don't notice that stuff. Keep it non-specific to be safe.

God it's like a minefield.

 

[Kitty_Schrödinger]

God it's like a minefield.

Come on, use your brain!
Leave her looks alone and start convo about something different, weather, damn Lost, egg prices or movie.

 

[satindesire]

Hmmm... at the risk of being nitpicky, complimenting a woman on her hair may leave her wondering if you're homosexual. Most het guys (IME anyway) just don't notice that stuff. Keep it non-specific to be safe.

I don't know...I get more compliments about my hair from guys than I do women.

Of course, my hair is rather...unusual, so...YMMV.

God it's like a minefield.

"You look really pretty today." Always works. It's not about weight, it's not about any specific THING. Just general pretty. I don't know any SANE and rational woman without a chip on her shoulder or some serious penis envy problems that would take offense to that.

 

[TypicalDeviant]

Eh, I have a thing for a woman with nice hair, so I pay attention to that.

 

[human_male]

Come on, use your brain!
Leave her looks alone and start convo about something different, weather, damn Lost, egg prices or movie.

Madam, I already said... I tried that. For like, fukken years! Okay?

 

[human_male]

"You look really pretty today." Always works. It's not about weight, it's not about any specific THING. Just general pretty. I don't know any SANE and rational woman without a chip on her shoulder or some serious penis envy problems that would take offense to that.

It's not too forward?

 

[fuckmeat]

It's not too forward?

Not if you're not stripping her mentally or staring at her tits when you say it. If you can manage to say it in a way that doesn't translate as 'I'd love to fuck you' then it's unlikely to be too forward. You need to say it in the way you'd complement a sibling, aunt or other 'off limits' woman.

 

[PertPerth]

Never talk to a woman about her weight. Never!

For emphasis.
I hate it when anyone talks about my weight - good or bad.

 

[LaRocha]

It's not too forward?

Saying anything about their body is too forward. You have to already have some sort of relationship with them before they'll be comfortable with you saying they're cute. In flirting world you have to say the shoes or earrings are cute first, and not sound like a gay man. If they're single and have told you they're single and flirt with you then you can say anything you want.

 

[satindesire]

It's not too forward?

Not if you're not stripping her mentally or staring at her tits when you say it. If you can manage to say it in a way that doesn't translate as 'I'd love to fuck you' then it's unlikely to be too forward. You need to say it in the way you'd complement a sibling, aunt or other 'off limits' woman.

FM's right. If you do it in a lecherous way (Which I don't believe you're even CAPABLE of sweetheart!) then obviously it could be insulting, But...honestly, you're such a genuinely nice person that I really think it'd be the perfect way for you to compliment a lady on the fact that she looks fab.

 

[Kitty_Schrödinger]

Madam, I already said... I tried that. For like, fukken years! Okay?

I'm beginning to see why

 

[human_male]

I'm beginning to see why

Wow, how very nice of you.

 

[Kitty_Schrödinger]

For emphasis.
I hate it when anyone talks about my weight - good or bad.

For me it's not about hating talking about my weight- I simply think people who start coverstation with looks related topic as shallow and vain. And very, very boring.

 

[Kitty_Schrödinger]

Wow, how very nice of you.

Welcome.

 

[IsabellaKing]

Madam, I already said... I tried that. For like, fukken years! Okay?

Maybe you should try losing a bit of weight - she might be more into you then.