Has the swishy gay man stereotype helped or hurt us?

[deliciously_naughty]

As I watch the sexless Will and Grace, and see the many peppy gay male sidekicks on tv and in the movies, I can't help but wonder if this stereotype has helped or hurt us.

On the helping side:
Thanks to these personifications, gay men have become more visible in society, and many people who had not "encountered" a gay person feel as though they're friends with such people as Will and Jack. Maybe these characters have even changed a few people's attitudes about homosexuality.


On the hurting side: Don't get me wrong, I've met my fair share of men who can be said to embody the "stereotypical gay man" personality as demonstrated by these televised characters. However, that's hardly the only way that gay men act. Beyond that, these characters are rarely seen in a sexual manner...they don't kiss or have serious relationships. I'm not talking about Queer as Folk, which isn't part of the shows I'm discussing. Many gay men don't have a perfect bod. Many gay men don't know shit about decorating. Many gay men aren't theater queens, or queens at all.

Discuss....
*******

My 2 cents...

When I think about a gay "character" that profoundly affected me, I think of Pedro, from The Real World San Francisco. He lived his life, met a man, fell in love and married him in a beautiful comittment ceremony, and in no way was the stereotypical gay man. I remember when I heard that he had passed of AIDS, and I cried my eyes out because he had affected me so profoundly.

I really wish that we could see more of men like Pedro, and less of Jack, regardless of how funny the character can be.

 

[Effigy]

I really wish that we could see more of men like Pedro, and less of Jack, regardless of how funny the character can be.

You pick on jack as a stereotype, and not will?

 

[Queersetti]

I think the use of the swishy stereotype in public culture diminishes us, it tells society "these are not people to be taken seriously", these are silly people.

Of course, there are gay men who are effeminate or of an inclination to act campy, and I have no problem with that at all, I am fully accepting of all the varieties of gay life.

But there are plenty of ways that the mainstream could stereotype gay men, and I don't think that the choice of viewing us as weak and ineffectual is benign.

 

[MissTaken]

Stereotypes of any kind tend to hurt.

To the degree to which one assumes all swishy, sensative males are gay or that if you are not swishy or sensitive, you aren't really gay, you are just confused, it discounts the individual's needs and desires.

On the other hand, perhaps society laying on stereotypes is the first step to tolerance which may beget understanding at some point. It used to be an issue of "Oh my! He is gay. Is it contagious?" And, now, people are more likely to recognize gay men who fit the stereotype and choose whether or not to interact with them, sans phobia.

Just my very tired two cents, but I do believe that people do not fit into little boxes as many would like to have us do.

 

[MzChrista]

Stereotypes of any kind tend to hurt.

To the degree to which one assumes all swishy, sensative males are gay or that if you are not swishy or sensitive, you aren't really gay, you are just confused, it discounts the individual's needs and desires.

On the other hand, perhaps society laying on stereotypes is the first step to tolerance which may beget understanding at some point. It used to be an issue of "Oh my! He is gay. Is it contagious?" And, now, people are more likely to recognize gay men who fit the stereotype and choose whether or not to interact with them, sans phobia.

Just my very tired two cents, but I do believe that people do not fit into little boxes as many would like to have us do.

I can think of a little box I wouldnt mind fitting something into.

 

[MissTaken]

I can think of a little box I wouldnt mind fitting something into.

Ohhh that makes me tingle.

 

[SweetCherry]

 

[MzChrista]

Ohhh that makes me tingle.

I bet the sound of a latex glove snapping on just puts you over the edge.

 

[SweetCherry]

I bet the sound of a latex glove snapping on just puts you over the edge.

*shivers*

Something about that thought makes me shiver in a good way.

 

[MissTaken]

I bet the sound of a latex glove snapping on just puts you over the edge.

Hmmm as long as it isn't time for my annual.

 

[MzChrista]

Hmmm as long as it isn't time for my annual.

Thats not the kind of examination I had in mind.
So hows the Domming going babe?

 

[Queersetti]

Stereotypes of any kind tend to hurt.

To the degree to which one assumes all swishy, sensative males are gay or that if you are not swishy or sensitive, you aren't really gay, you are just confused, it discounts the individual's needs and desires.

On the other hand, perhaps society laying on stereotypes is the first step to tolerance which may beget understanding at some point. It used to be an issue of "Oh my! He is gay. Is it contagious?" And, now, people are more likely to recognize gay men who fit the stereotype and choose whether or not to interact with them, sans phobia.

Just my very tired two cents, but I do believe that people do not fit into little boxes as many would like to have us do.

I agree that visibility increases tolerance with the general public. Most people are not hostile to people who are different, but in many cases they are ignorant, and recognizing the "others" in day to day life can teach them that they have no reason to fear or distrust us, so to that extent I can see your point.

But, as you said, when anyone feels they must conform to some pre-established mode of behavior, the stereotyping become destructive.

 

[Sterling]

I 100% agree with Queersetti on this issue

It really does raise tolerence.

Which just leaves the sterotypes which are NEVER good.

 

[rosco rathbone]

I can't stand the character of Jack from Will and Grace. I hate him so much I actually watch the show sometimes just to hate him. I don't see how he could possibly be helping the cause of the gays.