Hardest thing

[CrimsonDom]

In everyones opinion what are the hardest part of a Dom/sub relationship? I know right now for me and my pet it's the aspect of now having a child in the house.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

In everyones opinion what are the hardest part of a Dom/sub relationship? I know right now for me and my pet it's the aspect of now having a child in the house.

IMNSHO, the hardest part of *any* relationship is expressing and showing respect for one another within the relationship.

 

[seela]

Change. Accepting it. Celebrating it.
Being friendly.
Patience.

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

It seems to me that it is the delineations and definitions about what makes it special to you that have to be so carefully guarded and protected from the more mainstream world and communities we belong to and live in.

There is something special about shared secrets and knowing smiles of course, but feeling like you can't share this thing that fulfills you with all of the beloved people in your life can muddle the otherwise lighter emotions of it, at least at times.

 

[ecstaticsub]

For a long term relationship -- adapting to change. But I would say that would be for any relationship, vanilla or D/s.

Perhaps more specifically to D/s would be adapting to changes when D/s has to take a back seat to reality while still keeping the relationship strong

 

[Kim_Burly]

This is something I am dreading, Sir and I are still in what I call our honeymoon phase. He spends lots of time with me and my children, but we still have time alone in his house where he can do unspeakably delicious things to me. In a few months we will be married and we will all be under the same roof. While I long for that and my children are actually looking forward to it, it is going to be a huge change. He is currently contracting to have a small in-law house built, for us to have "quality time" in. Being rich isn't all it's cracked up to be, but it does advantages. I am still very nervous. Fortunately, he is a true gentleman and he treats me like ma queen in front of others, which is very important for my daughter to see.

 

[rexhame317]

Our hardest thing is time. He works night, I work days. I have kids that I do need to be around for. We make the time we have together speecial. I will sometimes stay after a session and nap with him before he goes to work. And I have spent the night, even if I have tp leave early in the morning for work.

Its stressful sometimes, but it does work. We talk a lot and that helps

 

[BrightlyGo]

The hardest part for me is communicating what I want/need out of the actual d/s part of our relationship. We have pretty good communication for most things, and we've worked out the big issues that all couples have to, but when it comes to "I /need/ to be tied up, I /need/ tease & denial," or whatever other neurotic, needy-sub compulsion is driving me crazy atm, I just seize up. I'm my own worst enemy, that way.

 

[Oubliette123]

I agree, for me teenagers in the house lol. But we have found ways to adapt over the years. A lock on the door, music playing, a gag have all helped

Also we seemed to have fine tuned the mind control aspect-amazing what silent exchanges can happen whilst I am doing the dishes!

 

[edevane]

Conversely to what most people on this thread are saying, our biggest problem is parents who always seem to be home at the worst times.
It's even worse when I visit my boyfriend at Uni, with someone in the rooms next to, above and below at all times, plus a communal kitchen across the hall and very cheap, thin walls, sex has become pretty vanilla recently :-\

 

[laurasunshinegal]

In everyones opinion what are the hardest part of a Dom/sub relationship? I know right now for me and my pet it's the aspect of now having a child in the house.

i would agree that having children does challenge a D/s relationship. with our #1 responsibility being to the kids, we obviously need a unified and almost equal front. from not touching the boiling pot of water to taking a shower at night, we both know that the kids can't have a "mom says, but dad is the boss" point of view. however the flip side is that we DO want them to appreciate traditional values! its a constant, evolving (but wonderful) task to do what is best for them... but still be our normal, D/s selves at the end of the day.