Handling Rejection

ginsbergian

Really Experienced
Joined
Oct 16, 2006
Posts
109
Hey all--

If there is already a thread for this that I'm just missing, feel free to chastise and direct me there.

I write poems and stories, non-erotic in nature, though I have a lot of admiration for erotic lit (which accounts probably for why I spend so much time here!) but I don't really have the knack for writing it, I guess, as much as other things. So, anyway, lately I've been trying to get a lot of things published--sending them out to magazines--and the response has been pretty negative.

Now, I know this is just part of it. "The blues you never lose"--to quote the Delmore Brothers. But, I guess I'm just wondering how you beautiful Lit folk out there have learned to deal with negative feedback and rejection in writing life?

It's definitely got me down lately, and making it hard for me to keep working on writing. Any pearls?
 
You might try setting your sights lower and publishing at the level you are able and where you can find enjoyment. The parameters to publish at Literotica, for instance, really aren't very high. You could concentrate on being pleased with publishing here and getting even limited approval. And there are sites that have even fewer submission restrictions than this one. You don't have to go for an agent and mainstream publishing from the very beginning.

And if you really suck at writing and must write, you could write it just for yourself and tuck it away. And if you really want to write (and take care of the technicals) better than you do, you can take the time and effort to study it. There's no easy button in this business.

There's really no level of satisfaction that's lower than what's available if you are realistic in your assessments of your abilties and expectations for enjoyment.
 
I guess I should clarify that I'm writing non-genre stuff. It seems like Lit (and other sites like it) aren't really the place for posting my non-fiction essay about a dead banjo player. That's not a knock to lit, I'm just trying to be realistic (as you suggest) about the markets for particular kinds of writing and the kinds of things people want to read.

Also, I'm not questioning your advice (which is, I think, smart) but I guess I'm wondering more specifically about how other writers internalize this kind of feedback, and press on into working on new things.


You might try setting your sights lower and publishing at the level you are able and where you can find enjoyment. The parameters to publish at Literotica, for instance, really aren't very high. You could concentrate on being pleased with publishing here and getting even limited approval. And there are sites that have even fewer submission restrictions than this one. You don't have to go for an agent and mainstream publishing from the very beginning.

And if you really suck at writing and must write, you could write it just for yourself and tuck it away. And if you really want to write (and take care of the technicals) better than you do, you can take the time and effort to study it. There's no easy button in this business.

There's really no level of satisfaction that's lower than what's available if you are realistic in your assessments of your abilties and expectations for enjoyment.
 
There's a section called "Story Feedback". Put some material in there and read the comments.
Take heed to them, re-write the story and re-submit, perhaps.
 
Also, I'm not questioning your advice (which is, I think, smart) but I guess I'm wondering more specifically about how other writers internalize this kind of feedback, and press on into working on new things.

Well, I don't sniffle about rejection. I work in publishing, and I've seen a whole lot of great manuscripts get rejected because they didn't fulfill the particular need we had at a time. It wasn't about the manuscript being bad; it wasn't filling the present bill and there were lots of just as good manuscripts coming over the transom. So, I suggest not dwelling on rejection, and just moving on to writing (or doing) something else (and bringing the earlier ones up again if it looks like they fit somewhere--with, perhaps, keeping your eyes open for opportunities). The bottom lines are A. that writing is a renewable resource; you can keep on churning new stuff out, and B. If you hit the jackpot with something, you've got all of that stuff previously turned down that now has higher value in the marketplace.

I don't know if that responds to your "problem," but I'm not all that sure you understand what is bothering you other than that all of the stars haven't always aligned for you in your writing. In which case, join the club. It's the fittest and those able to find the balance who survive in this game. There's no use to be miserable in this. If it's not working, feel free to get your kicks in some other endeavor.
 
I guess I should clarify that I'm writing non-genre stuff. It seems like Lit (and other sites like it) aren't really the place for posting my non-fiction essay about a dead banjo player. That's not a knock to lit, I'm just trying to be realistic (as you suggest) about the markets for particular kinds of writing and the kinds of things people want to read.

Also, I'm not questioning your advice (which is, I think, smart) but I guess I'm wondering more specifically about how other writers internalize this kind of feedback, and press on into working on new things.

Lit has a novels and novellas category as well as a non erotic category so you can post your dead banjo player story here.

As for rejection, well no one likes to be told they suck, but if you would like any future success you need to develop a thick skin and be open minded to any constructive feedback you get,
 
I currently have 40 novels published for pay. I could paper a room with the rejection slips that I received, before I finally got published. I often wonder if anyone actualy bothered to read what I submitted, prior to rejecting it.
 
Rejections are not uncommon. The manuscripts of many of the books that we now think of as ‘best sellers’ and ‘great literature’ got rejected by the first half dozen or so publishers.

The best rejections are the ones that say: Sorry, we’re not interested – for these reasons.

If your manuscript is rejected because it’s too long or too short or too highbrow or too lowbrow, you may be able to fix it and have another go. If the publisher just doesn’t do ‘dead banjo players’, then you know that you need to either find a new subject or a different publisher: one that does do dead banjo players.

Mercifully, in a long career as a writer I have had very few outright rejections – probably because I tend to write with a specific reader/publisher/producer in mind.

And if you are convinced that you really can tell a good story about a dead banjo player – and tell it well – have you considered self-publishing?
 
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Possibly not (to the RR post. The next one posted while I was composing)--both agent and publisher--if it didn't give the clear impression it filled the existing seasonal catalog holes. This is the major reason for the Monday morning quarterbacking comments on publishers/agents who turned down blockbusters. Agents/publishers mostly look for what fills the hole in a catalog offering that meets the needs of their targeted market, not the next bombshell best-seller, particularly if it's not in the realm in which their promotional targeting is set up.
 
And if you are convinced that you really can tell a good story about a dead banjo player – and tell it well – have you considered self-publishing?

Or have you researched in detail who would likely publish it? Writers tend to think that the most important and difficult aspect is the writing. Self-publishers tend to think that the most important and difficult aspects are the writing and production.

In reality, the most difficult and time-consuming aspect is the marketing--to the agent/publisher and the to the end buyer.
 
Here is my blogpost about self-publishing online.

I had moderate success in my early days of writing and was lucky enough to turn out one story that hit the Hot spot my very first go on Lit but all my stories since then have wavered in ratings.

I know now that my writing style needs some serious thought if I want to be successful. I found this out by joining a small writing group on Facebook and making it clear I would welcome harsh criticism about my writing here and elsewhere.

People often say, You should write what pleases yourself, but if you want to talk to the world, you have to make some compromise and not do it in Me-me-me talk the whole time; that's a separate job and quite enjoyable in itself if you can grit your teeth and not be self-centred. A good editor can help here, if you have published here (there's even a non-erotic category), you're entitled to go into the volunteer editor programme and find someone to give you feedback on how to shape your writing.

There are times when I think that although it's clearly work of genius, my writing isn't going to make it in the world at large and I feel a bit :( but then I read a bit of it and it makes me :) and I pick it up again and try to reshape it. I have a lot of other writing fun, I edit for a couple of people and I go in writers' groups and chat with friends, I post answers to questions on the threads here.

I have just about two secret fans who leave quiet anonymous messages saying they love my stories and I often think of them to cheer me up when I think 'my writing sucks'.

When I realised my writing style had particular faults to it that would make it difficult for my stories to 'succeed' in terms of having lots of sales/downloads I changed genre. By accident I started writing something completely different. That isn't really successful either! but it's helping me to learn how to write in a different style, which I may be able to take back to my other stories.

Whatever, I keep writing: blogposts, thread posts, six word stories, 150 word flash fiction, my own stories.

I hope that helps!
:heart:
 
Catching the brass ring means nuthin to me. Most of my major accomplishments were simple and private endeavors no one noted nor remembers. But occasionally I hada major impact on a life.

I want my writing to jar and stun people. I want it to unbalance readers like sudden death and old flames disturb them. This sort of power isnt something any pedigogical saw-mill can cut and plane and size for its customers; the power is only good for one application, like tampons and sperm. But power is also as fragile and light as the feather that drops the camel. And the mastery comes when you know whether to drop the house or the feather on your reader.

What editors and publishers think matters little to me when my real quarry is so much bigger and important.
 
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Of course you have to actually get it published and readers to read it before you can stun them with your brilliance.
 
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