Guys: don't send form letters

[Jenneva]

If you think we can't tell that you are PM'ing with a form letter, well, you're wrong.

Most real correspondence starts with why a person has noticed you on the boards and their reason for contacting you privately.

And yes, we know if you change the first sentence, or just plug in our username all throughout.

OK, just had to get that out there.

((sheesh))

 

[wicked woman]

Unfortunately most of the offenders won't bother to take the time to read this. You can dream though.

 

[mynameisben]

Hi Jeneva!

I think this post is really, really great. I've read all of your posts, Jeneva, and all I can say is WOW! You really make me hot. Your profile page pics got me all hard, Jeneva. I hope to see more of you soon, if you know what I mean.

Please check your PM box, Jeneva, if you want to see pics of my massive, hard cook. Hope you can send pix in kind. Oooooh, baaaay-beeeee! Jeneva, I cunt wait!



-Ben

 

[galen107]

I am cursed, with sounding like i am writing form letters, but in reality it is that i am more formal then most, so it just seems like a form...if that makes any sense

 

[mynameisben]

I am cursed, with sounding like i am writing form letters, but in reality it is that i am more formal then most, so it just seems like a form...if that makes any sense

I totally hear you, dude. That's why I pepper up all my PMs with plenty of smilies. Chix really dig 'em. :caning:

 

[Licia]

If you think we can't tell that you are PM'ing with a form letter, well, you're wrong.

Most real correspondence starts with why a person has noticed you on the boards and their reason for contacting you privately.

And yes, we know if you change the first sentence, or just plug in our username all throughout.

OK, just had to get that out there.

((sheesh))

Ha!

The impression I receive: the obnoxious stranger. Standing in everyone's path, he functions as a robotic rude. "My Card! Yes, annoyance is guaranteed by at least four paper cuts."

*cheesey grin/thumb-pinky imitating a phone*

"Sext me!"

 

[Sir_Winston54]

Hi Jeneva!

I think this post is really, really great. I've read all of your posts, Jeneva, and all I can say is WOW! You really make me hot. Your profile page pics got me all hard, Jeneva. I hope to see more of you soon, if you know what I mean.

Please check your PM box, Jeneva, if you want to see pics of my massive, hard cook. Hope you can send pix in kind. Oooooh, baaaay-beeeee! Jeneva, I cunt wait!



-Ben

For cod's sake, Bung, if the name of someone you wish to perv on is spelled in a manner you (Bung) can't quite remember, copy-paste it into your form PM rather than misspell it multiple times! Come on, Bung, you're dragging down the reputation of all pervy men here, Bung!

 

[DVS]

If you think we can't tell that you are PM'ing with a form letter, well, you're wrong.

Most real correspondence starts with why a person has noticed you on the boards and their reason for contacting you privately.

And yes, we know if you change the first sentence, or just plug in our username all throughout.

OK, just had to get that out there.

((sheesh))

So, you want the form letters sent to this thread, instead? I'm confused.

 

[Literotti]

Re: Don't use form letters.

If you think we can't tell that you are PM'ing with a form letter, well, you're wrong.

Most real correspondence starts with why a person has noticed you on the boards and their reason for contacting you privately.

And yes, we know if you change the first sentence, or just plug in our username all throughout.

OK, just had to get that out there.

((sheesh))

What about the women who do not reply, even with a "no thank you" after you have taken the time to write a personal note or letter commenting about what they have written in their profile?

Who wants to waste their time?

I know. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. But I have done this many times. And yes, I do know how to write a polite, personal letter of introduction.

 

[LazzieLace]

What about the women who do not reply, even with a "no thank you" after you have taken the time to write a personal note or letter commenting about what they have written in their profile?

Who wants to waste their time?

I know. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. But I have done this many times. And yes, I do know how to write a polite, personal letter of introduction.

If I get a nice personal pm, I will always reply to it.

If your just telling me that you have a nice cock and I should check it out, then I figure that you have probably sent the same 'personal note' to many girls.

I agree it is annoying to send a PM and get nothing back.

 

[mynameisben]

If I get a nice personal pm, I will always reply to it.

If your just telling me that you have a nice cock and I should check it out, then I figure that you have probably sent the same 'personal note' to many girls.

I agree it is annoying to send a PM and get nothing back.

Your take on all of this seems eminently sensible, LazzieLace. I should send you a cleverly crafted PM to disguise my inner barbarian and see how it goes...

 

[DVS]

What about the women who do not reply, even with a "no thank you" after you have taken the time to write a personal note or letter commenting about what they have written in their profile?

Who wants to waste their time?

I know. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. But I have done this many times. And yes, I do know how to write a polite, personal letter of introduction.

I've felt the same way, and while I still do, I also understand the other side, even if I don't agree with it. They get a lot of messages. Just reading them takes a lot of time. Now you want them to send a nice little "no thanks" message to all of those?

But yes, it sucks. You don't get even a rejection note. Nothing. I've often said you don't even get a "fuck off" reply to let you know they even read your message. But, that's how this world is. It didn't use to be that way, but the more distant we become with the Internet, the more distant we become with our communications. I see it as callus or impersonal, when you are trying to make one of the more personal connections there is. And you are lumped in with the rest of the low life rejections, even if you thought your message was heartfelt and honest. It tends to make you wonder if some of what they complain about get in messages is maybe at least a little bit fueled by their rejection policy.

I'm unemployed. With the Internet, the process of looking for a job has changed quite a bit. You apply for a job online, most of the time, these days. Most companies don't like strangers walking onto their property, mostly for security reasons, but also because it's much easier for them to run their application process online and allow their front secretary to do her regular job and not have to deal with receiving hundreds of people through the front door.

Because applications are now mostly online, you don't get to talk to anybody to find out anything they didn't provide on the application. Sometimes the salary they intend to pay for the job isn't there, but they require you to fill in what you would require to take the job.

You submit the application and you wait. You know nothing until and unless they contact you for an interview. If you're lucky, they interview you, but then the waiting starts again. You quickly find out that the whole process is controlled by the employer and if they want you, you will be contacted. If they don't want you, you won't.

This meat market of finding a sex partner is the same thing. If they want you, you will be contacted. If they don't want you, you won't. You don't know what the recipient is looking for in a contact message, so you just give it your best shot. You don't know if you made a connection or if you were thought to be just another jerk. Maybe some word you used was a turn off, or some phrase triggered a red flag. It could be something you could explain away in a few seconds, but unless you are given the chance, you'll never know. You'll never know how close or how far you came to making a connection. But, that's just how it is, these days. Suck it up and understand it will only get worse, as time goes along.

Some men are the cause of a lot of this. The number of messages they send, and the tone of the message makes me wonder if they ever make a connection. I guess by the sheer number of messages they send out, they eventually connect with someone. Some newbie submissive might swoon at such talk, but it makes me mad that the bulk of our gender doesn't know how to properly negotiate with someone and at the same time be courteous.

This Internet has caused a lot of new things in this world, and a lot of those things are very beneficial. But, the way we communicate has really begun to suck. And everybody is to blame. There's very few winners. I think those who didn't reply to me lost out on potentially a very sexual encounter (insert devious smile here), but they will never know. So, I suck it up and try again with someone else.

After a while, it becomes as callus and impersonal on my side, too. No need to get my hopes up, if my introductory message is going to get rejected, yet again. Did I say something that offended? Did I say something that seemed like it was a form letter approach? I'll never know.

And she'll never know the exquisite feeling of being sexually aroused by someone who knows ways to make a woman shiver. But that's just my opinion, of course, because it seems like nobody else cares to know. Yes, it does make me wonder...why waste my time?

 

[RedButterflySlut]

I seemed to have written this post as if it was addressed to a form-letter-sender, but I'm going to go with it.

I agree with this- form letters aren't going to get you anywhere.
It's like going to every girl and saying "PLZ HAS SEKZ WIF ME- K TNX." Except you're not a cute cat. You're a dude I don't know that I have no information on, and therefor have no reason to want to get to know you better. Telling me your age/sex/location is not titillating.
As a general rule, men are more visually stimulated than women. I like when I know someone liked my picture, but that's not really big incentive for me to reply to them. You took a risk to message me, but it's also a risk for me to message you back. I have no idea how you (the guy) will react to what I say.
It's like looking at a spider, and being afraid of it. We're both the spider, and the person looking on with terror. Afraid and unsure of how to act.

Tell me the things that make you human. Accept the fact that I'm human too, and we'll be good.

If you're some guy reading this, and you think to yourself 'I'll only do that stuff when I want to date a chick'- stop. That mentality can get you laid occasionally, but those are lucky shots- not from talent or earning a girl's respect.
As my name says, I can be a slut. However, only men I'm attracted to will see that.

Also-
I used to reply to everyone, but there are a lot of guys that just don't accept a lack of interest.
They get downright nasty, like it's an insult. It's not- just two people looking for different things. Unfortunately I've learned silence is often the best tactic.

 

[FurryFury]

I've gotten a lot of notes over the years I've been here. I usually answer at least once.

Often they say they noticed me. I ask how did they notice me. Because I'm pretty sure it is a form type of note.

What really bugs me on a lot of groups is when they ask a question that they can easily find the answer to on my profile.

Or when they demand something from me.

Whatevs.

 

[lovetoread]

The best part of the form letters is when they forget to change your name. I will answer those, just to point out the error.

And I don't believe it's rude to not answer messages from someone who does not post. I don't know this person, and if you are asking me to Top you, then you dont know who I am either. There is no reason to respond.

 

[Primalex]

If you think we can't tell that you are PM'ing with a form letter, well, you're wrong.

Maybe "we" don't care if you can tell, because 95% of the women who write stuff like that they want "intelligent conversations" barely manage to write a whole sentence when you approach them anyway.

And when I look at my inbox, I think even the examples in the asshat PMs thread are often ten times smarter and more creative than how women try to get in contact with a guy.

 

[DVS]

The best part of the form letters is when they forget to change your name. I will answer those, just to point out the error.

And I don't believe it's rude to not answer messages from someone who does not post. I don't know this person, and if you are asking me to Top you, then you dont know who I am either. There is no reason to respond.

I can understand your point. I know women get their share of PMs here.

My post isn't about this place. My experience is based on meat market sites like alt, bondage and collarme (put '.com' after each). The PMs I've gotten here have all been nice. And while I don't PM someone that much, anybody I've PM'd has replied. I don't consider this a meat market.

 

[Rikki_13]

I try to reply to those that sent a real note of interest about something I have said or they read in my profile. But, I have several guys that send me the "please suck my cock" requests when they have posted three times in the 6 yrs they have been here. I feel those don't even deserve a response.

The one that is even better is the guy that has written three stories and he changes the name in the stories to the female he is trying to pick up. He has sent me these stories several times over, usually forgetting to change the female's name to my name at least once each time he does this. Typically, he always includes the same introduction, "I was just thinking of you and wrote this story for you today. I hope it gets you hot and bothered. Feel free to PM me after you have read it and we can see what we can do about the fire between your legs."

 

[Spectator1975]

I love this threat. Fun to read the replies. Love sassy women that take no bullshit =) With that said... Where can I find one of these "form letters"? *ducks* kidding... I'm kidding!

 

[kiwi_submissive]

I get the exact same PM from the same guy once a fortnight or so. The first couple of times I replied that I was not interested. The next couple I replied that he had already sent me this PM and maybe he had me confused with someone else and after than I just gave up and deleted the PM without even reading it.

 

[Noira]

Man, I don't get all these waves of PMs over here. Guess I'm not cool enough. I reply to everyone, even the ones who ask me with a form letter composed in mangled English if I can get on and cyber with them. My reply might be "I don't chat and I demand some semblance of spelling and punctuation if we communicate any further", or it might be "no thank you, but I appreciate the thought" depending on my mood. And in the time I've spent on CollarMe I do reply to the people who take the time to compose me nice long personal messages that clearly indicate they've read my profile, and depending on my mood, might even reply to the wankers to lol at them a little.

I suppose I'm the rare and the few and that's why I don't get many messages except from the rare and the few.

Of course, there was one time I was browsing Lit and I was feeling pretty horny, if you get my meaning, and I got PMed by a form letter wanker who had the good sense to compose a fairly well written message and I replied to say "normally I tell people to bugger off but I appreciated your well written message" and he never replied. And I might've actually been willing to chat that day! Damn. The rare and the few moments, I suppose. Oh well, in the end, I do appreciate messages from people who've clearly taken the time to get to know a bit about my internet self before messaging me...

And I guess I need to have a boobie avatar or something because I still only get a message once in the blue moon here; I never felt like it was too meat market message happy.

 

[DVS]

I try to reply to those that sent a real note of interest about something I have said or they read in my profile. But, I have several guys that send me the "please suck my cock" requests when they have posted three times in the 6 yrs they have been here. I feel those don't even deserve a response.

The one that is even better is the guy that has written three stories and he changes the name in the stories to the female he is trying to pick up. He has sent me these stories several times over, usually forgetting to change the female's name to my name at least once each time he does this. Typically, he always includes the same introduction, "I was just thinking of you and wrote this story for you today. I hope it gets you hot and bothered. Feel free to PM me after you have read it and we can see what we can do about the fire between your legs."

LOL, that's funny!

 

[lovetoread]

I can understand your point. I know women get their share of PMs here.

My post isn't about this place. My experience is based on meat market sites like alt, bondage and collarme (put '.com' after each). The PMs I've gotten here have all been nice. And while I don't PM someone that much, anybody I've PM'd has replied. I don't consider this a meat market.

Ah, I'm knowledgable about those sites.

Most messages are nice, but sometimes it's hard to think of a nice response when you get one that says "literally drop to your knees and service me", or "let me see what you look like to see if I want to own you."

I wasn't taught the correct responses while growing up I suppose.

And one does not need a boob av to receive them. I didn't start using them till recently.

 

[DVS]

Ah, I'm knowledgable about those sites.

Most messages are nice, but sometimes it's hard to think of a nice response when you get one that says "literally drop to your knees and service me", or "let me see what you look like to see if I want to own you."

I wasn't taught the correct responses while growing up I suppose.

And one does not need a boob av to receive them. I didn't start using them till recently.

I wouldn't respond to those, either. Nobody should.

 

[Netzach]

I'm a super rude asshole who means to get to it and answer people and never does. Friends let alone people hoping I have time for more.