Going Home

[Annisthyrienne]

Lorrie-Ann Baker sighed with exasperation as she rummaged through the purse on the passenger's seat for the ringing cell phone even as she sped down the two lane county road. It was the fifth time it had rang in the last hour. She didn't even have to look at the number on the screen to know who it would be.

Barry. Her agent and usually her friend. Or what passed as a true friend these days anyway. Since her unexpected rocket to fame after going to the final round of that TV talent show, her life has been a constant whirlwind of people who all claimed to want to be her friend. They all wanted to do what was best for her, or so they all claimed. She knew they were making plenty of money off her too. But the money wasn't the issue. She just felt like all the constant demands were pulling her too thin, like taffy at the county fair.

She found the phone and flipped it open with another heavy sigh.

"What is it now, Barry?"

"It's been you the last four times. Why would it be anyone else?"

"No. I told you I'm taking a break!"

"I don't care! You said after the Forum gig I could have a couple weeks to myself. Now I'm holding you to that."

"I know, Barry, but you can just reschedule it! You got me into it, now you get me out. It's not open for debate. I'm on vacation!"

She flipped the phone closed angrily, swearing under her breath. She knew he meant well. Barry had been largely responsible for her career taking off like it had. But Barry seemed to think she was just a voice and a body, with no person attached. He wanted her to fulfill commitment after commitment, non-stop, as if she were a karaoke machine he could rent out or something.

Sure, her voice was a gift. It had made life rewarding and had made her rich besides. But sometimes she just felt like there ought to be something more. She was having that feeling more and more lately. It wasn't that she didn't like what she was doing. It was a dream life. Money, fame, anything she could want. The trouble is, it wasn't enough.

And that bothered her. It should have been enough for anyone in their right mind. She hadn't been born with a silver spoon in her mouth, after all. She'd grown up as just another small town girl and had been happy enough. She'd always dreamed of the glamorous life, like any other girl, she supposed. But unlike most young girls, her dreams had come true. So why wasn't she as happy as she thought she always would be? What was wrong with her?

The phone rang again, and instead of answering it, she shut it off entirely. Nobody who had her current number would be anyone she'd want to talk to right now anyhow. It was probably just Barry again, trying once more to get her to change her mind. He'd wanted her to fly out to Dallas to do a photo shoot for some teeny bopper idol magazine. She knew she had a lot of younger fans, mostly young girls who liked to dream they had a chance to make it big like she did. But her music wasn't exactly teeny bopper pop after all. She didn't kid herself about being the next Britney Spears or Katy Perry. It wouldn't be the end of the world to reschedule the shoot for the next month's issue.

As she drove the two and a half hour route to McConnelsville, her one-time home town, she let her thoughts drift back to the happy times she'd had there in her childhood. They said you couldn't go home again, but damned if she wouldn't try. Since the day her mother had packed them up to move to the big city, hoping for a better life after the heated and prolonged divorce that was far too scandalous for a small town not to gossip about, she had never quite felt as if she belonged, wherever she was.

Oh, she had made friends. She'd even been popular in high school; maybe a little too popular. She'd been one of the party crowd, often staying out late on school nights, drinking and carrying on in a way would have made the people who had known her in McConnelsville cringe. If they could have seen what she'd been like then, they'd probably still be gossiping about it.

And with the crowd she ran with, she'd always been accepted, but none of those people had ever been close. Not really close. Not like Bethany. In fact, she couldn't remember most of their names now, only 4 years after graduation. And she doubted that any of them would give her the time of day now, if she weren't a celebrity. Of course with her fame, they'd love to count her among their friends now. But it wasn't real. They would be like all the other people in her life now, valuing her only for what she could do for them.

Not like Bethany. They had been inseparable, like sisters. No, like twins. Not that they were the same, but they were that close. Always. When she'd fallen off the monkey bars on the school playground that day in third grade and twisted her ankle, it was Bethany who had been there to pick her up, staying with her until the playground teacher came and took her to the nurse. Even then, Bethany was there, refusing to leave her side until Lorrie's mother had come to pick her up.

And when Billy Stephens had made fun of her because she had to get braces, it was Bethany who's shoulder she cried on; Bethany who'd assured her she was still pretty, and would only be prettier when the braces did their job. She'd been right too. Now the camera loved her. It had been part of the reason she'd done so well on that TV show.

Lorrie wondered if Bethany still lived in McConnelsville. Would she see her there? What would that be like? Could they still be close after all these years? She wondered what else would be different about her old home town. It had been almost 9 years now. The closest she had come to this place was the Forum gig the night before. And even that was two and a half hours away by car.

Now as her thoughts occupied her mind, the miles had slipped away and it seemed like the concert of the night before was a lifetime away as she made the last turn on the little two lane that would lead right into McConnelsville. She could see the faded blue water tower marking the city limits. It almost seemed a joke to call it a city now, after she'd spent the last eight plus years in real cities that were at least ten times the size of this little town.

She slowed down as she passed a shopping center, anchored by a Wal Mart. That was new. And look, there was a Starbucks. The damn things were everywhere these days. Lorrie recalled the times that her mom and Bethany's mother would get together over coffee at Kristen's Diner on Main street. Was the diner even still there? In the mood she was in now, she was certain that no soulless corporate specialty coffee chain store could ever have the class and appeal as that little small town diner.

She continued through town to the motel on the far end. At least that was where she intended to go. But when she got there, it was obvious the old motel had been out of business for a while. It was now a staging place for weekend flea markets, and this being a Saturday afternoon, it looked like there were plenty of tables. She shrugged and turned around in the parking lot of the Friendship Baptist church. She'd have to make some other arrangements for a place to stay. And she knew just where to ask. That is, if the old IGA hadn't gone out of business too.

She turned down Market street and covered the three blocks to the old grocery store. With a sigh of relief, she noted that it was still open and seemed to be thriving. She pulled the rental car into the closest space out of habit. Usually these days she traveled in limos that dropped her off right at the entrance of wherever she was going. It was a necessity. Wherever she went, people recognized her from the TV show, and from her publicity. Too many autograph seekers made life difficult, so she tried to avoid being in public too much.

But in this sleepy little town, it seemed hard to believe anyone would make a fuss over her. After all, the last time they'd seen her, she'd been a gangly, skinny little pre-teen with braces. She let out a breath she hadn't been aware she'd been holding and slipped on her sunglasses. Getting out of the car, she glanced around nervously, taking a moment to stretch her 5'-8" trim frame before starting casually for the store entrance.

The afternoon was hot, but not too unpleasant. Still it felt good when the automatic door opened and the cool rush of the air conditioning hit her, the differential breeze tussling her strawberry blonde hair slightly. She strolled in, hoping she'd dressed casually enough in her designer jeans and crisp white blouse over a pink tank camisole to blend in to the locals. She imagined she could feel everyone looking at her as she headed for the beverage aisle, picking up a few bottles of peach iced tea from the cooler.

Grabbing a bag of ranch flavored chips to go with her drinks, she headed for the checkout counter, hoping to ask the clerk about any other motels in the area. She'd just taken her place in the line and was glancing surreptitiously around, checking to see if she recognized any familiar faces, when she noticed the woman in the next lane over. There was something about her that seemed familiar, something that caused a sudden sense of longing for the old days to surge within her. The intensity of the feeling took her by surprise as her eyes passed over the short bob hairstyle, deciding it couldn't be anyone she knew. But Lorrie wondered what it was about the woman that affected her so.

Her musing was interrupted, drawn back to her own counter when the voice of the checkout clerk rang out a little too loud for normal conversation.

"Oh my goodness! Aren't you that girl? That one I saw on TV a while back! You were on that show, weren't you? The one they have all those people singing on?"

Lorrie blushed slightly, mildly annoyed, but used to the fuss. The clerk's voice was just loud enough to turn heads in her direction. Now of course if she asked about a motel, everyone would know where she was staying. She'd never get a moment's peace. She was about to respond when her eyes settled on the face of the woman with the short bob hair. She'd know those friendly brown eyes anywhere. Her astonished lips mouthed one word, almost too quiet to hear over the clerk's continued gushing.

"Beth?"

 

[palemoon2035]

It was just another one of those days. Bethany got out of her car and walked into a giant puddle in the tiny parking lot of General Grocer. It was the same store she had been going to since she was just a tiny little thing. Her earliest memories included shopping; always wanting to tag along with her mother. Not that she had a choice. Her mom wanted her company, and she always loved the smell of fresh vegetables. Sometimes she would ask if Lorrie could tag along. What 9 year old wants to go to the grocery store just because? Lorrie did. “One day General Grocer is gonna win the battle in the great tomato war,” they always joked. It was just a silly little inside joke that made the two girls giggle. Bethany was always giggling at that age and she was so happy to have Lorrie to giggle with her.

Bethany didn’t really know what made her think of that just now. It had been years since she last saw Lorrie. Something about the sight of the General Grocer sign brought back that memory. Ah, yes, her best friend. The two were inseparable. Bethany always looked out for her and always cared for her. Lorrie was number one in her book. She would do anything for her. Bethany remembered her mother laughing as she said, “You two are gonna get married.” Bethany’s response was always, “Mom, you’re silly. Girls can’t get married,” as she wrinkled her nose and giggled. Of course, Bethany later realized just how amazing and supportive her mom was, despite them living in a small town where diversity wasn’t exactly embraced.

The fair-skinned brunette with all of her cute little freckles on her nose and cheeks made her way inside. It is amazing how a store sign can spark a memory which can lead to a whole train of thoughts. Suddenly she was paging through a photo album in her mind. Or perhaps it was more liking watching Super 8 home movies in her head. It had been at least 9 years since she last saw Lorrie. Up until the day she left, the two truly were like sisters. That is how she always thought of Lorrie.

It wasn’t just Bethany who looked out for Lorrie. They looked out for each other. Bethany recalled the day she left the back gate open and her dog fell into the gulch. Bethany, in turn lept to catch her, and broke her leg. Lorrie helped them both out, and came by everyday to keep Bethany company; writing message and drawing a pretty flower garden on her cast, and drawing more pretty flowers on her dog’s leg cast as well.

Then, there was perhaps the most touching moment Bethany could recall from their many years of friendship. It had been just over a year since Lorrie first left and became a star. There were a few phone calls and the occasional e-mail, but Bethany knew Lorrie’s schedule didn’t allow much time for small town friends. Lorrie was the last person on Bethany’s mind the day her mother died suddenly. She didn’t expect to hear from her ever again, but somehow, Lorrie found out, and took time out of her busy schedule to call her. It was a difficult conversation as Bethany was an emotional wreck, but it meant the world to her to hear her friend consoling voice. Then, there were the flowers she sent. Bethany knew it could have been her agent or some intern who sent them at the order of some executive, but this wasn’t the case. She sent the perfect arrangement of lilies and white roses. They were the most favorite flower of Bethany’s and her mother’s. The card was in Lorrie’s handwriting. It was a personal touch for which Bethany was so very grateful.

So much time had passed though. Bethany stayed in McConnelsivlle. She never married, continuing to live in the house she grew up in, now emptier. Her brother came to visit from time to time. He always encouraged her to get out more. Every time he stopped by her told her she should find herself a nice boyfriend. Bethany took little interest in the dating scene. She had gone out with a few guys, but only because it was expected of her. The relationships never lasted more than two dates. Bethany just never felt anything. There was no connection and no attraction to anybody she went out with.

Bethany attended community college and got an Associate’s Degree in Information Technology, but her passion was writing poetry. With a nearly nonexistent social life, she had plenty of time to read, write, and find some semblance of a social clique with other writers online. With little confidence, she never sought to be published. Her hundreds of poems remained in a stack of tattered spiral notebooks left over from high school. No one ever filled an entire notebook from one class, so Bethany made it her mission to fill the many blank pages with her words. “Paper was meant to be written on,” she often said to anyone who would listen.

Today was just one of those days. She had been questioning the routine of her life. She had a decent job, and a nice house, but…it was empty, and providing network support from home was easy, but had become too routine in and of itself. So, she decided to go out. That was a break from a normally routine day. And though it was only the grocery store, at least it was somewhere other than behind a computer screen.

Amazing how one gets lost in thought. As Bethany finished paging through her mental photo album, she suddenly found herself staring at 20 different boxes of cereal. Then, something drew her attention. Her eyes lead her to the checkout counter. The cashier seemed quite excited about something so she focused more on the ruckus. She suddenly felt butterflies in her tummy. Her jaw dropped as she looked at the woman who the cashier seemed to ogle over. Could it be? Really? It was Lorrie!

“Beth?”

The beautiful blonde called her name. Bethany simply nodded. She was so surprised; she didn’t know what to say. She felt giddy and couldn’t think to do anything else but walk over to her old friend and give her a hug. “Oh my god, Lorrie!” She felt tears form as her eyes turned red. She was overjoyed. “I was just thinking abou- Oh my, Lorrie! What are you doing here? How long has it been?” Her arms wrapped around Lorrie’s body and she gave her a warm, loving embrace. It had been 9 years since she hugged her friend, and it felt just as wonderful and loving as it always had.

Bethany stood with her arms wrapped tightly around Lorrie, as if she didn’t want to let her get away. She had a million questions and a million more things she wanted to say, but all she did was hug her. Time had not worn this relationship. Though they lost touch, some connections never truly weaken. They stretch, like elastic. People are pulled in opposite directions and the streams connecting flex with them, and when one is let go and free to return, they snap back to each other; sometimes even closer than ever before.

It wasn’t until the cashier interrupted them, holding out a pen and note pad, “ahem,” clearing her throat, that Bethany pulled back, her eyes, blue as the sky above, staring into Lorrie’s.

 

[Annisthyrienne]

It was her! Lorrie's eyes lit up and a grin spread across her face as she rushed forward, meeting her best friend halfway. Her eyes misted with tears of happiness as she hugged her friend tightly. She wished she was stronger. She felt like picking Beth up and spinning her around.

"Oh my, Lorrie! What are you doing here? How long has it been?”

"Beth I'm so glad to see you! I wondered if you still lived here. I hoped you did!"

They both spoke at once, then Lorrie laughed, realizing she was gushing like a school girl. It made sense in a way. The last time they'd been together was the summer after middle school. Lorrie blushed a little, but still couldn't stop smiling as she held her friend in her arms, lingering just a little longer than might be proper. Impulsively she kissed her childhood friend on the cheek before stepping back to look at her.

She blushed deeper as she realized a crowd had gathered around and was watching them. Her eyes cast a look of apology to Bethany as she noticed the matching blush on her friend's face just as the cashier stepped forward, staring at both of them, holding out a notepad to have her sign an autograph. She took the offered pen and hastily scribbled her name, remembering to smile as she handed back the pen and paper. But it was not the smile she pasted on for the cameras. For the first time in a long time, she didn't have to fake it as her eyes looked past the crowd to meet Bethany's.

They closed in around her, local townsfolk, her fans, nearly pushing Bethany to the margins. Lorrie's brows briefly furrowed and for a moment, the bright smile faded, the unexpected feeling of sadness and loss taking the place of her momentary euphoria that reuniting with Beth had caused to well up within her. She shook hands with someone and pasted on another smile for one quick picture with another fan, snapped with someone's cell phone camera, before rather peremptorily excusing herself, pushing through the crowd to get to Bethany.

"Hey, Beth, sorry about that. It happens a lot. Listen, I'd really love to do some catching up with you. Is that old diner still open on Main street? We could get some coffee maybe?"