God, I need some passion…

[rgraham666]

back in my life.

I realised today how much I miss it.

When I was a computer programmer, I was passionate about that.

I loved looking at a problem, deciding how to write the code, design the files, test my creations and install it. I was good at it and I enjoyed it a lot.

But computer programming became a 'normal' thing to do, so there was less and less space for me in that field. 'Normal' people don't get passionate about their work.

And I've always been passionate about women, as long as I can remember.

But since I wasn't 'normal' I had no opportunity to express that during high school. Which is when we first learn all about that sort of thing. No girl in my neighbourhood would have anything to do with me. And were less than kind rejecting me when I tried.

So I learned to keep a distance from something I felt passionate about, afraid of being hurt again. And those times I tried later in life didn't work as I was a clumsy as a high school kid.

Until I met my ex. For a few years, I could express my passion. I liked it, a lot.

Both my passions collapsed at pretty much the same time. The damage that did nearly destroyed me. It took me years to recover.

And today I'm finding I miss having passion. I can sometimes, for moments, find that passion again when I write.

But I'm afraid of passion now. I'm not sure I would survive if I lost it again. So I find myself pushing it away.

I still miss it though.

I want passion back in my life, damn it!

OK, rant over. Threadjack away.

 

[entitled]

i'm one of those clumsy people, too. My first 'date' was a blind date to junior prom. It was.... interesting. Put me off dating ANYBODY until college.

It's been very recently that i've learned to not be afraid of passion. Something scared the hell out of me (or is that into me?) and changed that entirely. Now you're all stuck with it.

<hijack>
i need to clean up all these stickers.
</hijack>

 

[DrFreud]

Great topic RG. I'm a firm believer than nothing great can be accomplished without passion.

I have a passion for computer programming too, but even that has evolved. There was a time where writing algorithms got me tingly, but not anymore. And i find it frustrating not to find the same spark that I used to have. But I evolve, and so does my passion. The bottom line is that my passion still exists.

I don't fight it even though I fully understand what you mean by fear of losing it.
Actually that reminds me of the following 2 lines from Gibran's "The prophet":
" And what is fear of need but need itself?
Is not dread of thirst when your well is full, thirst that is unquenchable? "

Good luck Rob

 

[LadyJeanne]

I feel passionate about all kinds of little things...a buttery croissant, fresh raspberries and cream, the perfect fettucine alfredo recipe, chocolate, a new leaf growing on one of my hard to propagate plants, the fat orange moon I saw last weekend, a sexy pair of shoes, my comfy jeans, the sun setting over the Pacific, divinely sented candles and a bubble bath...I think that's how I keep my sanity. The little passions add up.

 

[dr_mabeuse]

LJ, I love you, darling, but passionate about a bubble bath?

Passion is what we feel when we want to achieve perfect intimacy with something, whether it's a person, or a sunset, or the work we do, or a song, or a cause. It's the urge to merge. It's the way we feel when we've so closely identified with something that a piece of us is invested in it.

Well, okay. I guess you can be passionate about a bubble bath.

You can also be passionate about passion, which is where I think Rob is coming from. It's a good sign.

 

[blackhaus7]

rg, find a passion about something. It's what will drive you. It really doesn't matter what, but find something that you know you won't lose and it will sustain you.

Good luck.

B

 

[LadyJeanne]

LJ, I love you, darling, but passionate about a bubble bath?

Passion is what we feel when we want to achieve perfect intimacy with something, whether it's a person, or a sunset, or the work we do, or a song, or a cause. It's the urge to merge. It's the way we feel when we've so closely identified with something that a piece of us is invested in it.

Well, okay. I guess you can be passionate about a bubble bath.

You can also be passionate about passion, which is where I think Rob is coming from. It's a good sign.

Mmm, think cinnamon scented bathroom lit by candles, long hair pinned up, ends curling from the steam, hands slipping along wet, naked skin, taut nipples, dancing fingers, face flushed, a low moan...

Yep, I can feel passionate about a bubble bath.

 

[Wildcard Ky]

Mmm, think cinnamon scented bathroom lit by candles, long hair pinned up, ends curling from the steam, hands slipping along wet, naked skin, taut nipples, dancing fingers, face flushed, a low moan...

Yep, I can feel passionate about a bubble bath.

Hell, that description has me feeling something akin to passion.

I think the only true passion I have left comes from nature. Nature is the only truly honest thing left in our world. Humans, and anything humans touch has some degree of false pretense in it somewhere. When I get into the woods, or on the water, all is right in the world. It's just me an whatever nature chooses to show me that day. I'm not even sure if passion is the right word. It's more like a religious experience to go out and simply blend into nature for a few hours.

 

[tolyk]

All I can say is that passion is what lead me to photography... and without my cameras, I would also be devoid of it..


You don't have passion for your wonderful writings RG?

 

[yui]

*Hugs* Rob.

I'm passionate about learning, knowledge, knowing. It's what keeps me taking classes in obscure subjects years after college graduation and listening to CDs in my car like "A Brief History of the English Language" and "Eighteenth Century Wit" and all sorts of other fun stuff.

 

[Guest]

Rob,

Your writing is filled with passion. And heat.

You must be pouring that part of yourself into your words.

And through your kindness and support, you are enabling others to become passionate in so many other ways.

You'll find a comfortable way to enjoy it yourself, I'm certain. And soon.

But for now, please know that you are inspiring it in others.

 

[LadyJeanne]

Hell, that description has me feeling something akin to passion.

I think the only true passion I have left comes from nature. Nature is the only truly honest thing left in our world. Humans, and anything humans touch has some degree of false pretense in it somewhere. When I get into the woods, or on the water, all is right in the world. It's just me an whatever nature chooses to show me that day. I'm not even sure if passion is the right word. It's more like a religious experience to go out and simply blend into nature for a few hours.

I feel this too. There's just something about nature that's compelling to all my senses, my mind, my body. Whether it's lunch at the ocean or a drive through Death Valley, I get the same sense of peace and life and passion all rolled into one.

 

[blackhaus7]

Rob,

Your writing is filled with passion. And heat.

You must be pouring that part of yourself into your words.

And through your kindness and support, you are enabling others to become passionate in so many other ways.

You'll find a comfortable way to enjoy it yourself, I'm certain. And soon.

But for now, please know that you are inspiring it in others.

sarahh:
I think he wants more. Nice is good, but passion isn't necessarily nice. Passion is passion.

 

[ShyOKBoy]

Take care not to become passionate about the idea of passion, either. Lucius described a woman who plucked herself with one of Cupid's arrows, and fell in love with love itself. It resulted in folly after folly, and made her a fool in the end. I imagine it like one of those "3D" laser-prints, where if you focus on it too literally, you just see a bunch of random squiggles and dots. If you relax, and look beyond it, a surprisingly clear and deep picture emerges!

 

[ABSTRUSE]

I can relate to the loss of passion.
When I used to draw and paint, I became absorbed in my work. It was a love/hate relationship. I knew my potential and berated myself but it was what worked for me.
When I'm passionate about something I'm instoppable. It drives me to extremes,...but, one misconstrued word from someone can destroy it all.

I used to compare my passion as a marriage that was heading for divorce. We got along to a point but there was irreconsireable differences. We were better friends than partners.

I too miss my passion. It's what kept me going for so long. I felt invincible with it and without it I feel empty.

 

[rgraham666]

*Hugs* Rob.

I'm passionate about learning, knowledge, knowing.

This one especially resonated with me.

One of the main reasons I got into computer programming was that I knew, sooner or later, it would touch on everything. I would have opportunities to learn about anything I wanted.

Then I bumped up against one of the problems of our society. You're only supposed to be skilled in your own field. If you want to know about another field, ask another expert.

Polymaths are not thought highly of. It's so, so gauche.

Thanks all. Doing better this morning.

 

[Guest]

passion undiscovered.
its there, waiting to be revealed. you've only to remember what you've done with it.
perhaps, as stated in this very thread, you only need to draw on what you've written to reassimilate.
im sending you the bestest of thoughts today, my friend.

 

[neonlyte]

I wonder about 'passion'. Is it something we only appreciate or see at a distance? Something we reminisce over?

I think you are 'passionate' over and through you writing Rob, and whilst it may not give you what you crave it is something to hold onto until you feel strong enough to give freely of yourself. Rejection and failure are huge obstacles to confront and 'we' must conquer both in order achieve what we desire. No one said it was easy.

 

[Guest]

sarahh:
I think he wants more. Nice is good, but passion isn't necessarily nice. Passion is passion.

Yes, I completely agree.

But what I was trying to say was that "Passion" can't be there all of the time. For anyone.

Because passion is powerful and overwhelming and exhausting.

I think it runs in cycles. It think it has to.

And that's why I know you'll get yours back, Rob.

(But in the meantime, pour it out into your stories. Please?? )

 

[CharleyH]

back in my life.

I realised today how much I miss it.

When I was a computer programmer, I was passionate about that.

I loved looking at a problem, deciding how to write the code, design the files, test my creations and install it. I was good at it and I enjoyed it a lot.

But computer programming became a 'normal' thing to do, so there was less and less space for me in that field. 'Normal' people don't get passionate about their work.

And I've always been passionate about women, as long as I can remember.

But since I wasn't 'normal' I had no opportunity to express that during high school. Which is when we first learn all about that sort of thing. No girl in my neighbourhood would have anything to do with me. And were less than kind rejecting me when I tried.

So I learned to keep a distance from something I felt passionate about, afraid of being hurt again. And those times I tried later in life didn't work as I was a clumsy as a high school kid.

Until I met my ex. For a few years, I could express my passion. I liked it, a lot.

Both my passions collapsed at pretty much the same time. The damage that did nearly destroyed me. It took me years to recover.

And today I'm finding I miss having passion. I can sometimes, for moments, find that passion again when I write.

But I'm afraid of passion now. I'm not sure I would survive if I lost it again. So I find myself pushing it away.

I still miss it though.

I want passion back in my life, damn it!

OK, rant over. Threadjack away.

Passion is only a need of doing. If you lost your zest for anything in life, for example, how can you expect passion in return? Shouldn't you make it?

 

[yui]

This one especially resonated with me.

One of the main reasons I got into computer programming was that I knew, sooner or later, it would touch on everything. I would have opportunities to learn about anything I wanted.

Then I bumped up against one of the problems of our society. You're only supposed to be skilled in your own field. If you want to know about another field, ask another expert.

Polymaths are not thought highly of. It's so, so gauche.

Thanks all. Doing better this morning.

Being gauche is so much more interesting than being normal.

 

[AppleBiter]

I think I've had too much passion, lately. Leaves me longing for complacency, to some degree.

 

[hotchkiss]

I used to do almost everything with great enthusiasm, when I painted I would work every spare moment I could. As I got older I customised Scooters then the old VeeDubs, learned to weld, spray, panrel beat etc as the needs arose with a fervour.

A critical hit on the love front knocked me for six, destroyed my trust and well I'm sure theres loads of you out there been there so I;m not going to dwell on it.
I've always been the type to put things off until the last possible moment though its my biggest flaw so if I wasnt fired up by something it easily fell aside to be finished one day. Unfortunately that side of me has overwhelmed the passion that lifes knocks and kicks in the balls has beaten down and blulted somewhat.

So I fully sympathise with you R

I relly should sign off and get my brushes out!!! Perhaps later! There I go again.

 

[RhymeFairy]

When one has been hurt, it is hard to get back upon that horse. I have experienced this myself. A lil secret for ya my friend. Believe in it, and it shall be. Hope is eternal, passion is forever. Love is nothing without each of these. That's what makes life so wonderful and different. Go out have fun. Meet some new friends, maybe just maybe your new passion is right around the corner. Question is ... are you ready for it?

Much luck, hugggs and Happiness for you my Friend ~

 

[SeaCat]

I live for life and the enjoying of it. I live to experience new things. I find it incredible to meet new people and learn from them. I am passionate about living life to its fullest. I am sure that this will one day lead to my downfall but until then I will attempt to enjoy and learn from everything I experience.

Cat

Sometimes passion isn't all about doing, sometimes it is about just sitting there and seeing.