Genuine question about Fisting

[BobRocket]

My (m) wife (f) has recently talked about us trying to explore stretching her with the ultimate goal of me using my whole hand inside her.


We’ve been using a large dildo and my fingers up until now.


I’m a well built man, my hands are quite large and she has always , even after childbirth been quite small down there. I’m well aware of the marvels of the female anatomy and know that that can accommodate a babie so I know my hand should not be an issue.

Do we have to build up to my how hand over a long period? If anyone has any experience with a new partner doing this how long did it take before you could fit in your hand .

And did it give your partner the pleasure they expected?

This is a genuine question so please treat the answers genuinely.

Thanks

 

[metrifonate]

My experience from several years ago with a girlfriend at university.
She loved the feeling of being stretched and she had some experience of large object insertion and even used her own hand up to the knuckles.
At first I made her use her own hand to start off with then I used mine. We used to play often and slowly I found it easier to tuck my thumb under my fingers and shape my hand so make if slip in easier. Eventually she could get her own hand in and one time when she was very aroused I managed my hand. I guess it was over a few months of playing.

 

[BobRocket]

Thanks.

I appreciate that. Not sure if this changes anything but my wife is late 30s.

I’ve read about using gloves and trying my non dominant hand as that tends to be smaller. Gloves aren’t our thing but may help I guess.

I assume she really liked it that time you inserted fully

 

[metrifonate]

Thanks.

I appreciate that. Not sure if this changes anything but my wife is late 30s.

I’ve read about using gloves and trying my non dominant hand as that tends to be smaller. Gloves aren’t our thing but may help I guess.

I assume she really liked it that time you inserted fully

Yes, I was just confirming it was possible and maybe in a similar position to you.
Yes, she really enjoyed it when I fully inserted. I think also the man has to learn the right technique, how much pressure, when to push, how to insert fingers.

 

[BobRocket]

Yeah. We’re able to communicate quite openly so she’ll guide me on how she’s feeling.
I feels a little ‘alien’ to me. I don’t want to hurt her but she’s the one that is pushing the idea.

 

[cubbyfire04]

Thanks.

I appreciate that. Not sure if this changes anything but my wife is late 30s.

I’ve read about using gloves and trying my non dominant hand as that tends to be smaller. Gloves aren’t our thing but may help I guess.

I assume she really liked it that time you inserted fully

Use gloves... Especially if it's the first time, or it's been a while. It's not really about it being "your thing" as much as the purpose they serve.

Of course there's the protection aspect. When you're taxing the delicate tissue in and around the vagina (or anus) there's bound to be at least some micro-traumas (small tears, abrasions, inflammation, etc.).

The gloves obviously provide some protection against microbial contact. But I think, more importantly, they smooth out all of the contours of your hand/wrist. Deep knuckle grooves, hair, nails, hang nails, calluses, etc... they all increase friction. It may not seem like much, but the most sensitive parts of the body will respond to their cumulative effect.

As for the non-dominant hand, I don't love that theory. I'd say the difference in size is negligible when you consider you have far more control and fine motor skills with your dominant hand.

A thicker lube helps too. Find something that will stay put (and is compatible with your glove) and use a lot. Prepare for a huge mess (excess lube and possible body fluids - including pee) and have fun with it!

If she's up for it and you're both patient, and you communicate clearly, it will be a mind-bending experience. The accomplishment alone creates excitement that's overwhelming. Nevermind once you've both settled in and behind to work towards climax.

 

[BobRocket]

Thank you so much

Really good advice and well noted from my side

 

[Maya_Vakker]

I love a good fisting! Just like any good lover it takes time and patience. Back when I was producing content I was getting into large objects, the theme was popular so I went with it and loved the feeling. I eventually was able to take a wine bottle with some effort, I think 12” diameter.

I started slow and used a lot of lube. I tired inflatable dildos, which were ok, but didn’t really provide enough stretch. I liked to use multiple normal sized toys at first, then moved to water bottles with hot water to help relax the muscles. Eventually taking different sized Kong toys. Most importantly, lots a lube.

I’ve since stopped stretching because I had a Baratheon cyst, which was not fun. I’m not positive the stretching caused the cyst, but I’m not taking that risk anymore. It’s amazing how fast the body adapts back down. I can barely take a fist now. One act that is an absolute mind trip is getting fisted, then slide your cock in, and jack off. Whew, that’s just. Mmmmm.

 

[bestkeptsecret678]

One act that is an absolute mind trip is getting fisted, then slide your cock in, and jack off. Whew, that’s just. Mmmmm.

Just… wow.

 

[FoxtrotJulietRomeo]

No. 1: Accept that it may never happen.

That's not to be negative but it's a physiological fact. You just might not fit - ever - so be observant, open-minded and prepared for that possibility.

Beyond that, fisting is a 'full participation activity' it needs more of her than it does of you but you need to remain switched on and attentive/observant to allow her to relax, enjoy and ideally get truly lost in it. You're her protector and well as any other role which might creep into your psychology at the same time.

Stating the obvious but she needs to be excited, comfortable, relaxed and ready. None of those are necessarily obvious and an awkward or compromised body position can result in tension or an internal 'arrangement' of her anatomy which hinders what you're trying to achieve. Just as every woman's 'entry geometry' is different (you know how you fit some better from behind than you do from in front?) the same will apply to fisting. She needs to find the position and physical attitude which makes for the easiest 'access'.

This doesn't have to be the mechanical function that writing makes it sound - you watch, you learn and you remember what worked best for next time!

There are muscles involved as well as organs and bone structure. Muscles work best when they're (literally) warm so play around - LOTS - and make sure she's all the things I mentioned above.

As someone else said, lots of sticky lube! A water-based gel rather than an oil and make sure it's inside her as well as outside and that you're smothered in it!!

Play nicely!!! Give her outsides lots of attention, start with small 'invasions', pay attention to her responses and she will lead you without really knowing she's doing it. Get it right and she'll probably start to push towards you when she wants more or bigger.

Start with 'bunched' fingers - NOT a fist!! Slide a couple in, explore her, enjoy her, 'map' her insides as you go so you know what you're dealing with. Go gently DO NOT slam anything into anything. DO NOT try to force anything out of the way. If it's moveable/meant to move, when it's right, it will!!

Make sure YOU are in a stable and steady position. The last thing you want is to lurch off balance and hurt the poor girl because you hadn't thought about what you were doing or where you were doing it from. If you're tense and awkward, your hand and actions will be tense and awkward and more likely to defeat what you're trying to achieve.

Go slow to begin with - it's NOT a race!! Don't be afraid - and don't forget - to stop! Take a rest, let her rest, let her adjust to what's not invading her. It helps!!

If it goes well and you're all the way in, take a moment to savour that for both of you - and enjoy that delicious moment when she clamps herself round your wrist - it's FUCKING AMAZING!!! Then carry on...

Now, MAYBE you can start to explore forming a fist - inside her - gently, carefully, considering all the advice and guidance everyone else has posted here because I haven't seen anything that doesn't count or matter. Be prepared to withdraw - a little - rotate - carefully, VERY carefully and make room for what you're trying/hoping to do.

NEVER get so lost in what you're doing or want to be doing that you lose sight of where she's at!

DO NOT do anything sudden or dramatic until you're both sufficiently confident and experienced.

DO NOT consider it failure if it doesn't work. Some just aren't made for it/you.

Make sure you BOTH enjoy it and if it works out well, practice, practice, practice and do it again and again and again...!!

One final experience-based note; fisting does NOT necessarily cause 'damaging' changes in a woman. If you do that, you're either unlucky or you did something wrong. She WILL adjust to the invasion and over time will find it easier to accommodate you but the woman I learned most of this with could still grip a pencil after years of fun...!!!

 

[jckontharocks]

All good advice. Wife and I regularly do this. I get my whole fist in, but it doesn't look like a porn movie. She really enjoys the magic wand while I fist her. We have really good luck with Wicked hybrid lube. Doesnt wreck the toy, but still very slippery. Just slowly play with her until your hand is in her. Might take 20-30 min.

 

[BobRocket]

No. 1: Accept that it may never happen.

That's not to be negative but it's a physiological fact. You just might not fit - ever - so be observant, open-minded and prepared for that possibility.

Beyond that, fisting is a 'full participation activity' it needs more of her than it does of you but you need to remain switched on and attentive/observant to allow her to relax, enjoy and ideally get truly lost in it. You're her protector and well as any other role which might creep into your psychology at the same time.

Stating the obvious but she needs to be excited, comfortable, relaxed and ready. None of those are necessarily obvious and an awkward or compromised body position can result in tension or an internal 'arrangement' of her anatomy which hinders what you're trying to achieve. Just as every woman's 'entry geometry' is different (you know how you fit some better from behind than you do from in front?) the same will apply to fisting. She needs to find the position and physical attitude which makes for the easiest 'access'.

This doesn't have to be the mechanical function that writing makes it sound - you watch, you learn and you remember what worked best for next time!

There are muscles involved as well as organs and bone structure. Muscles work best when they're (literally) warm so play around - LOTS - and make sure she's all the things I mentioned above.

As someone else said, lots of sticky lube! A water-based gel rather than an oil and make sure it's inside her as well as outside and that you're smothered in it!!

Play nicely!!! Give her outsides lots of attention, start with small 'invasions', pay attention to her responses and she will lead you without really knowing she's doing it. Get it right and she'll probably start to push towards you when she wants more or bigger.

Start with 'bunched' fingers - NOT a fist!! Slide a couple in, explore her, enjoy her, 'map' her insides as you go so you know what you're dealing with. Go gently DO NOT slam anything into anything. DO NOT try to force anything out of the way. If it's moveable/meant to move, when it's right, it will!!

Make sure YOU are in a stable and steady position. The last thing you want is to lurch off balance and hurt the poor girl because you hadn't thought about what you were doing or where you were doing it from. If you're tense and awkward, your hand and actions will be tense and awkward and more likely to defeat what you're trying to achieve.

Go slow to begin with - it's NOT a race!! Don't be afraid - and don't forget - to stop! Take a rest, let her rest, let her adjust to what's not invading her. It helps!!

If it goes well and you're all the way in, take a moment to savour that for both of you - and enjoy that delicious moment when she clamps herself round your wrist - it's FUCKING AMAZING!!! Then carry on...

Now, MAYBE you can start to explore forming a fist - inside her - gently, carefully, considering all the advice and guidance everyone else has posted here because I haven't seen anything that doesn't count or matter. Be prepared to withdraw - a little - rotate - carefully, VERY carefully and make room for what you're trying/hoping to do.

NEVER get so lost in what you're doing or want to be doing that you lose sight of where she's at!

DO NOT do anything sudden or dramatic until you're both sufficiently confident and experienced.

DO NOT consider it failure if it doesn't work. Some just aren't made for it/you.

Make sure you BOTH enjoy it and if it works out well, practice, practice, practice and do it again and again and again...!!

One final experience-based note; fisting does NOT necessarily cause 'damaging' changes in a woman. If you do that, you're wither unlucky or you did something wrong. She WILL adjust to the invasion and over time will find it easier to accommodate you but the woman I learned most of this with could still grip a pencil after years of fun...!!!

Thank you so much for the detailed response. I’m pleased to say my wife and I are very aligned with communication and sex, so shes I’m able to follow her body and her commands very easily.

I’m pleased to say we’ve made some limited advances since I posted (shes read the thread and reponses as shes on here as well). We’ve still a long way to go but the journey is half the fun isn’t it!

 

[BobRocket]

All good advice. Wife and I regularly do this. I get my whole fist in, but it doesn't look like a porn movie. She really enjoys the magic wand while I fist her. We have really good luck with Wicked hybrid lube. Doesnt wreck the toy, but still very slippery. Just slowly play with her until your hand is in her. Might take 20-30 min.

Do you know how long it took before you could get your whole hand in?

 

[jckontharocks]

Do you know how long it took before you could get your whole hand in?

It was only a couple tries. I realized quickly how much lube was enough and it worked easily. Have you tried a vibrator during? My wife almost NEEDS that to make it work.

 

[BobRocket]

It was only a couple tries. I realized quickly how much lube was enough and it worked easily. Have you tried a vibrator during? My wife almost NEEDS that to make it work.

You mean on her clit as I stretch her!

Yes.

 

[jckontharocks]

You mean on her clit as I stretch her!

Yes.

We got hot and heavy 2 nights ago, the vibrator was dead and fisting wasn't in the cards. Just wouldn't work. Don't get discouraged if it's something you both want.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I think 12” diameter.

Circumference I hope . I played around with insertions a bit back in the day, but a foot wide .

Champagne bottles work well, as they have that nice smooth increase in girth (no I’ve never taken one down to the cylindrical section). Pro tip; remove the muselet and cork first!

 

[IARainman]

Circumference I hope . I played around with insertions a bit back in the day, but a foot wide .

Champagne bottles work well, as they have that nice smooth increase in girth (no I’ve never taken one down to the cylindrical section). Pro tip; remove the muselet and cork first!

Can't hurt to have a drink or two on the way

 

[IARainman]

I hope it's not interfering with the original question, but since fishing aficionados are gathered. I'm guessing that orgasm is the ultimate goal of being fisted/using a large insertion, that some may cum from the insertion while others need other nipple or clitoral stimulation to get there. But what about after? I mean I know she'll return to usual dimensions but for those of you experienced, any other activities while she's gaping? Is intercourse even beneficial to either while she's still gaped? I mean other than warning and being amazed, any other activities upon success?

 

[EmilyMiller]

Can't hurt to have a drink or two on the way

Precisely

 

[EmilyMiller]

I hope it's not interfering with the original question, but since fishing aficionados are gathered. I'm guessing that orgasm is the ultimate goal of being fisted/using a large insertion, that some may cum from the insertion while others need other nipple or clitoral stimulation to get there. But what about after? I mean I know she'll return to usual dimensions but for those of you experienced, any other activities while she's gaping? Is intercourse even beneficial to either while she's still gaped? I mean other than warning and being amazed, any other activities upon success?

If you are doing insertions the point is doing insertions. I only did this anally - don’t want a home episiotomy thanks . And I did it with a girlfriend, so penile sex afterwards was not on the menu. It’s not even a good idea to move onto a strap-on in the same [distended] opening, unless it’s of equal girth to the large toy. And slowly inserting and quickly fucking are two rather incompatible things.

Best to cum with it inside, or take it out and then focus on clitoral massage / magic wand etc.

 

[IARainman]

If you are doing insertions the point is doing insertions. I only did this anally - don’t want a home episiotomy thanks . And I did it with a girlfriend, so penile sex afterwards was not on the menu. It’s not even a good idea to move onto a strap-on in the same [distended] opening, unless it’s of equal girth to the large toy. And slowly inserting and quickly fucking are two rather incompatible things.

Best to cum with it inside, or take it out and then focus on clitoral massage / magic wand etc.

Thanks for the info. So, I've seen some pretty amazing anal insertions (and some really scary ones.) How long after a session until things "snap back?"

 

[EmilyMiller]

Thanks for the info. So, I've seen some pretty amazing anal insertions (and some really scary ones.) How long after a session until things "snap back?"

How long is a piece of string? And we weren’t doing like Elise Siswet crazy shit. And we only did it a few times over a number of years. TBH it was kinda goal oriented, with the goal being fisting*. Once they gave me my medal and membership card, it was more like, so what’s next?

And - aside from a little bit of blood a couple of times - no injuries and certainly no prolapses, thank God!

* And my then girlfriend has smaller hands than Donald Trump. I never had any desire to let any of my male sexual partners try the same. I’m not the biggest of women as it is.

—

This is a more recent toy (and I actually no longer have it - it got lost in a house move). So big, but not BIG.

 

[TruthSeeker12345]

How long is a piece of string? And we weren’t doing like Elise Siswet crazy shit. And we only did it a few times over a number of years. TBH it was kinda goal oriented, with the goal being fisting*. Once they gave me my medal and membership card, it was more like, so what’s next?

And - aside from a little bit of blood a couple of times - no injuries and certainly no prolapses, thank God!

* And my then girlfriend has smaller hands than Donald Trump. I never had any desire to let any of my male sexual partners try the same. I’m not the biggest of women as it is.

—

This is a more recent toy (and I actually no longer have it - got lost on a house move). So big, but not BIG.

View attachment 2602289

There is an X-rated movie, "Candy Stripers" (1978) which features some fisting scenes. In it, Eileen Welles gets fisted by Nancy Hoffman. Nancy Hoffman is rather dainty, though. Actually, Nancy Hoffman manages to put both of her hands and wrists into Eileen Welles' vagina. The movie is available online, and you can read about it in IMDb.

 

[FoxtrotJulietRomeo]

Can't see anywhere that anyone has mentioned HotKinkyJo, DirtyGardenGirl or if you want to see something really extreme, Argendana.

NOT for the faint-hearted and definitely on the 'don't try this at home' list but some interesting watching...!!!