General Disclaimer:

[Ms_Lilith]

I just want it to be known that, when I post here, or anywhere else on Lit, I am not bashing Queer folk. Some of my comments might include the words "Faery", "Queer", "Dyke", etc, but they are words that I am comfortable using, because I am bisexual, myself. I always find that when I use a word like that, I have to follow it up with some kind of disclaimer comment, because I'm afraid of hurting someone.

This is my general disclaimer.

Just wanted to let you all know.

 

[Queersetti]

Okie doke.

 

[Lightning]

I just want it to be known that, when I post here, or anywhere else on Lit, I am not bashing Queer folk. Some of my comments might include the words "Faery", "Queer", "Dyke", etc, but they are words that I am comfortable using, because I am bisexual, myself. I always find that when I use a word like that, I have to follow it up with some kind of disclaimer comment, because I'm afraid of hurting someone.

This is my general disclaimer.

Just wanted to let you all know.

Spoken like a true "queer dyke".

Sorry, I couldn't resist. If it helps, I find it hard to take offense to what has been posted in this forum. Everyone seems very understanding & caring of one another. It's a nice venue that I greatly enjoy.

 

[ohfaque]

why would you being comfortable with saying "queer or Faery" be ok with everyone else?


I don't care if you are bisexual or not.

How about a black person saying Nigger, does that make it ok?

 

[deliciously_naughty]

why would you being comfortable with saying "queer or Faery" be ok with everyone else?


I don't care if you are bisexual or not.

How about a black person saying Nigger, does that make it ok?

When you are part of the minority (whether that be religious, ethnic, or orientation based) using words that coming from a non-member of that group can be an empowering experience. Reclaiming the power of words such as "fairy", "nigger" or "slut" can be an important part of reclaiming identity. If we live in fear of a word, then we are still wounded. If we've changed the meaning through disempowering it, we are less wounded or not wounded at all when the word is used in a negative way.

Just my .02.

 

[Ms_Lilith]

why would you being comfortable with saying "queer or Faery" be ok with everyone else?


I don't care if you are bisexual or not.

How about a black person saying Nigger, does that make it ok?

How many black people call themselves Niggers? In the music, in the pop culture, etc? It's taking a word that was formerly used as abuse, and making it an empowering word..

Everything in an insult is also in the tone in which it's said.. if someone looked at me and jokingly called me a dyke, I wouldnt be offended... but if someone said it harshly, with a cruel sneer on their face, that's a different story.

Many gay people are open to the words I've described when said within the community, or by people who mean no harm.

A line from "The War" with kevin Costner has never left my head:

"How I calls my kin ain't none of your business".

 

[Etoile]

why would you being comfortable with saying "queer or Faery" be ok with everyone else?

You're kidding, right?

I'm a queer dyke myself. I use the words, I love the words. I say fag too. I use the word gay as a term of endearment.

 

[ohfaque]

How many black people call themselves Niggers? In the music, in the pop culture, etc? It's taking a word that was formerly used as abuse, and making it an empowering word..

Everything in an insult is also in the tone in which it's said.. if someone looked at me and jokingly called me a dyke, I wouldnt be offended... but if someone said it harshly, with a cruel sneer on their face, that's a different story.

Many gay people are open to the words I've described when said within the community, or by people who mean no harm.

A line from "The War" with kevin Costner has never left my head:

"How I calls my kin ain't none of your business".

They have called each other nigger.

The tone it is used? You realize this is a web site and no one can hear your tone?

Where I come from, calling someone a Fag, Fairy or dyke(not considered as bad) is insulting.

Maybe it is liberating to some, but not all. Maybe you should consider this.

I know my gay family mmber takes offense to this.

You call yourself Bi sexual. Ok fine, but those terms do not generally apply to bi sexual women. You may feel comfortable using them, not everyone is comfortable hearing them.

Oh wait, this web site revolves around you right?


If you are going to post, on a public board a disclaimer for everyone to see, I wouldn't refer to lines about it not being someones bussiness. Unless it's only the business to people who agree with you?

 

[ohfaque]

You're kidding, right?

I'm a queer dyke myself. I use the words, I love the words. I say fag too. I use the word gay as a term of endearment.

Well ok then, since you say it's ok, then it's ok to call everyone you feel like a degrading name.


You can call yourself whatever you want, refer to yourself however you want, but I think calling another person a fag or a faery is crude and uncalled for.

 

[deliciously_naughty]

Well ok then, since you say it's ok, then it's ok to call everyone you feel like a degrading name.

You can call yourself whatever you want, refer to yourself however you want, but I think calling another person a fag or a faery is crude and uncalled for.

Then that's your opinion...and you follow your own beliefs. Just as you don't want us imposing our views on you, don't try to force us to change either.

 

[Queersetti]

They have called each other nigger.

The tone it is used? You realize this is a web site and no one can hear your tone?

Where I come from, calling someone a Fag, Fairy or dyke(not considered as bad) is insulting.

Maybe it is liberating to some, but not all. Maybe you should consider this.

I know my gay family mmber takes offense to this.

You call yourself Bi sexual. Ok fine, but those terms do not generally apply to bi sexual women. You may feel comfortable using them, not everyone is comfortable hearing them.

Oh wait, this web site revolves around you right?


If you are going to post, on a public board a disclaimer for everyone to see, I wouldn't refer to lines about it not being someones bussiness. Unless it's only the business to people who agree with you?

A lot of other people here have used the same terms, and you haven't objected.

Nor have I seen you speak up against the blatant and viciously hostile posts that are directed against gays and lesbians on the GB every single day.

It's pretty obvious that your concern over this issue is a pose, simply an excuse for you to troll Vixenshe.

 

[ohfaque]

A lot of other people here have used the same terms, and you haven't objected.

Nor have I seen you speak up against the blatant and viciously hostile posts that are directed against gays and lesbians on the GB every single day.

It's pretty obvious that your concern over this issue is a pose, simply an excuse for you to troll Vixenshe.

I thought you were more intelligent then that.

Look back a little, I have complimented Vixenshe and had nice conversations with her. I would hardly call that trolling.

I have a gay sibling, while I can't police the huge world of Lit 24 hours a day, I can and will reply off and on to certain posts.

What I didn't like was... She felt it was ok to use slurs because she is BI sexual.

That’s a bit messed up to me.


Mr. Setti, May you review peoples postings before calling someone a troll.

If speaking my mind makes me a troll, so be it. It makes you a hypocrite.

 

[ohfaque]

Then that's your opinion...and you follow your own beliefs. Just as you don't want us imposing our views on you, don't try to force us to change either.

I don't think posting my opinion in any way is forcing you to change now is it?

 

[Queersetti]

I thought you were more intelligent then that.

Look back a little, I have complimented Vixenshe and had nice conversations with her. I would hardly call that trolling.

I have a gay sibling, while I can't police the huge world of Lit 24 hours a day, I can and will reply off and on to certain posts.

What I didn't like was... She felt it was ok to use slurs because she is BI sexual.

That’s a bit messed up to me.


Mr. Setti, May you review peoples postings before calling someone a troll.

If speaking my mind makes me a troll, so be it. It makes you a hypocrite.

The fact that you may have a gay sibling does not make you a spokesperson for gays on this or any other issue.

You may or may not be a troll in other circumstances, but in this instance, you clearly intended to troll Vixenshe. Have you read any other threads on this board? The words you object to are used in many of them. You either ignored them until now, or you made a beeline for this thread in order to chastise Vixenshe.

If you are not trolling her, what accounts for your selective objection?

 

[ohfaque]

The fact that you may have a gay sibling does not make you a spokesperson for gays on this or any other issue.

You may or may not be a troll in other circumstances, but in this instance, you clearly intended to troll Vixenshe. Have you read any other threads on this board? The words you object to are used in many of them. You either ignored them until now, or you made a beeline for this thread in order to chastise Vixenshe.

If you are not trolling her, what accounts for your selective objection?

Did I ever claim to be a spokes person?

no, I don't think so.

If I called someone a fag, or a fairy, I would be jumped all over, but a gay or bi sexual person saying it makes it ok?
No, I don't read all the threads on this board, but I do have the option of seeing all the active threads being used.
I had just commented not long before on Vixenshes pretty smile. I saw this thread and came to look into it.

Why the need to defend Vixenshe? I never personally attacked her, I just disagreed with her. She is plenty capable of speaking for herself. I have seen her in action.


Call yourselfs fags, dykes and fairies all you want, but don't you dare jump on someone straight for saying it.

Oh wait, my opinion doesn't count to you right? Only people you agree with are allowed to speak their opinion? Wow, wouldn't LIT be a boring place?

 

[ohfaque]

what accounts for your selective objection?

It is on the first page of todays active threads.


I can not reply to every post, every time. Only eplied to her because of our conversation right before this.

I am sorry that not every thing I say is through the anal walls of people from having my nose that far up their ass.

 

[Queersetti]

Did I ever claim to be a spokes person?

no, I don't think so.

If I called someone a fag, or a fairy, I would be jumped all over, but a gay or bi sexual person saying it makes it ok?
No, I don't read all the threads on this board, but I do have the option of seeing all the active threads being used.
I had just commented not long before on Vixenshes pretty smile. I saw this thread and came to look into it.

Why the need to defend Vixenshe? I never personally attacked her, I just disagreed with her. She is plenty capable of speaking for herself. I have seen her in action.


Call yourselfs fags, dykes and fairies all you want, but don't you dare jump on someone straight for saying it.

Oh wait, my opinion doesn't count to you right? Only people you agree with are allowed to speak their opinion? Wow, wouldn't LIT be a boring place?

I re-iterate, you have no qualifications to tell gays and lesbians how they should behave, or react on any issue.

You are entitled to your opinion. You are nor entitles to lecture us on how we, as gays, should speak, feel or behave.

 

[glamorilla]

Did I ever claim to be a spokes person?

no, I don't think so.

If I called someone a fag, or a fairy, I would be jumped all over, but a gay or bi sexual person saying it makes it ok?
No, I don't read all the threads on this board, but I do have the option of seeing all the active threads being used.
I had just commented not long before on Vixenshes pretty smile. I saw this thread and came to look into it.

Why the need to defend Vixenshe? I never personally attacked her, I just disagreed with her. She is plenty capable of speaking for herself. I have seen her in action.


Call yourselfs fags, dykes and fairies all you want, but don't you dare jump on someone straight for saying it.

Oh wait, my opinion doesn't count to you right? Only people you agree with are allowed to speak their opinion? Wow, wouldn't LIT be a boring place?

what a drama queen.

 

[ohfaque]

what a drama queen.

*L* You seem to dislike me.

 

[glamorilla]

just your personality.

 

[zipman]

When you are part of the minority (whether that be religious, ethnic, or orientation based) using words that coming from a non-member of that group can be an empowering experience. Reclaiming the power of words such as "fairy", "nigger" or "slut" can be an important part of reclaiming identity. If we live in fear of a word, then we are still wounded. If we've changed the meaning through disempowering it, we are less wounded or not wounded at all when the word is used in a negative way.

Just my .02.

I think the above linguistic theory has 2 main results:

It may indeed remove the power of the word (i.e., fairy) for members of the minority group. Personally, I have always been of the mind that it doesn't matter what you call me, it only matters what I answer to.

It also legitimizes the word to some degree in the eyes of the larger group. I think the best example of this is the use of the word "nigger." Black people began calling each other that name a while ago in a subconscious effort to disempower it.

The result is that the word still carries a huge negative connotation if a non-black person says it to a black person. Therefore, it hasn't really been disempowered. It may cause them less pain to hear it (although I doubt it) but the word is still as powerful as it used to be.

I have heard many white people use the term and when rebuked, their reply is always "but they call each other that." By using the word, Black people have legitimized its use while not affecting the negative connotation.

There are many interesting theories about language and power, I just don't subscribe to the one you posted.

 

[ohfaque]

I re-iterate, you have no qualifications to tell gays and lesbians how they should behave, or react on any issue.

You are entitled to your opinion. You are nor entitles to lecture us on how we, as gays, should speak, feel or behave.

I am not telling gays how to act or react. You are touchy. I said how I feel. You don't seem to like that.

Vixenshe is not gay.

Just tell me, why is it ok for her to call someone a fag, but not me? Not that I ever would, but it seems to be a bit hypocritical.


This really seems to be a hot issue with you.

Why don't you like a guy voicing his opinion?

Go for it buddy, go ahead and call yourselves fags , queers, fairies, if that is what you want, but don't expect everyone to like it. Just because you say it is ok, doesn't make it ok for everybody.

That seems really hard for you to understand.

 

[ohfaque]

I think the above linguistic theory has 2 main results:

It may indeed remove the power of the word (i.e., fairy) for members of the minority group. Personally, I have always been of the mind that it doesn't matter what you call me, it only matters what I answer to.

It also legitimizes the word to some degree in the eyes of the larger group. I think the best example of this is the use of the word "nigger." Black people began calling each other that name a while ago in a subconscious effort to disempower it.

The result is that the word still carries a huge negative connotation if a non-black person says it to a black person. Therefore, it hasn't really been disempowered. It may cause them less pain to hear it (although I doubt it) but the word is still as powerful as it used to be.

I have heard many white people use the term and when rebuked, their reply is always "but they call each other that." By using the word, Black people have legitimized its use while not affecting the negative connotation.

There are many interesting theories about language and power, I just don't subscribe to the one you posted.

I don't think this could have been put any better then this. I applaud you Zipman.

 

[Queersetti]

I am not telling gays how to act or react. You are touchy. I said how I feel. You don't seem to like that.

Vixenshe is not gay.

Just tell me, why is it ok for her to call someone a fag, but not me? Not that I ever would, but it seems to be a bit hypocritical.


This really seems to be a hot issue with you.

Why don't you like a guy voicing his opinion?

Go for it buddy, go ahead and call yourselves fags , queers, fairies, if that is what you want, but don't expect everyone to like it. Just because you say it is ok, doesn't make it ok for everybody.

That seems really hard for you to understand.

I wasn't aware that I needed your permission to use certain words.

What you don't seem to understand is that many of us are no longer willing to act like nice little boys and girls and beg society to pretty please let us be who we are. We don't need your approval.

 

[glamorilla]

I think the above linguistic theory has 2 main results:

It may indeed remove the power of the word (i.e., fairy) for members of the minority group. Personally, I have always been of the mind that it doesn't matter what you call me, it only matters what I answer to.

It also legitimizes the word to some degree in the eyes of the larger group. I think the best example of this is the use of the word "nigger." Black people began calling each other that name a while ago in a subconscious effort to disempower it.

The result is that the word still carries a huge negative connotation if a non-black person says it to a black person. Therefore, it hasn't really been disempowered. It may cause them less pain to hear it (although I doubt it) but the word is still as powerful as it used to be.

I have heard many white people use the term and when rebuked, their reply is always "but they call each other that." By using the word, Black people have legitimized its use while not affecting the negative connotation.

There are many interesting theories about language and power, I just don't subscribe to the one you posted.

the view you subscribe to is unpopular.

by embracing the word "nigger" black people have illustrated just how wrong it is to use it.

personally i understand a lot of what you say~i don't like the word nigger being used in any way much in the same way i don't really care for using the word fag in polite conversation or as a term of endearment~it is an insult~and as long as it is it will also be there to remind you of it.

now as for how vixenshe chooses to label herself...yes~she can lovingly refer to herself as whatever makes her happiest.

which is why i prefer "gay" myself.