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Nirvanadragones said:This afternoon at M&S
My 6 year old: Mummy, look at the little baby. Isn't she adorable?
Me: Yes, Love.
My 6 year old: Mummy, but you're not even looking! She's looking right at me! Look at her eyes!
Me: *Glancing over at the baby and her mother shopping right next to us.* She is beautiful.
My 6 year old to the baby's mom: How old is she and what is her name?
Baby's Mum: *smiling* She's 3 months, and her name is Angelica.
My 6 year old: We have a baby, too. She's an angel and her name is Gabrielle.
Baby's Mum: Lovely! Where is she?
*silence*
My 6 year old: She was too tiny to live. But she's still my baby sister.
Baby's Mum: *tears*
For all my angels.Nirvanadragones said:This afternoon at M&S
My 6 year old: Mummy, look at the little baby. Isn't she adorable?
Me: Yes, Love.
My 6 year old: Mummy, but you're not even looking! She's looking right at me! Look at her eyes!
Me: *Glancing over at the baby and her mother shopping right next to us.* She is beautiful.
My 6 year old to the baby's mom: How old is she and what is her name?
Baby's Mum: *smiling* She's 3 months, and her name is Angelica.
My 6 year old: We have a baby, too. She's an angel and her name is Gabrielle.
Baby's Mum: Lovely! Where is she?
*silence*
My 6 year old: She was too tiny to live. But she's still my baby sister.
Baby's Mum: *tears*
Nirvanadragones said:This afternoon at M&S
My 6 year old: Mummy, look at the little baby. Isn't she adorable?
Me: Yes, Love.
My 6 year old: Mummy, but you're not even looking! She's looking right at me! Look at her eyes!
Me: *Glancing over at the baby and her mother shopping right next to us.* She is beautiful.
My 6 year old to the baby's mom: How old is she and what is her name?
Baby's Mum: *smiling* She's 3 months, and her name is Angelica.
My 6 year old: We have a baby, too. She's an angel and her name is Gabrielle.
Baby's Mum: Lovely! Where is she?
*silence*
My 6 year old: She was too tiny to live. But she's still my baby sister.
Baby's Mum: *tears*

Nirvanadragones said:This afternoon at M&S
My 6 year old: Mummy, look at the little baby. Isn't she adorable?
Me: Yes, Love.
My 6 year old: Mummy, but you're not even looking! She's looking right at me! Look at her eyes!
Me: *Glancing over at the baby and her mother shopping right next to us.* She is beautiful.
My 6 year old to the baby's mom: How old is she and what is her name?
Baby's Mum: *smiling* She's 3 months, and her name is Angelica.
My 6 year old: We have a baby, too. She's an angel and her name is Gabrielle.
Baby's Mum: Lovely! Where is she?
*silence*
My 6 year old: She was too tiny to live. But she's still my baby sister.
Baby's Mum: *tears*

Roxanne Appleby said:<chokes up>
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i love you.Nirvanadragones said:Thank you, Lovelies. I love you all. Thank you for the support - even after all these months. Or should it be, especially after all these months?![]()
It's like . . . I'm ok, and I'm coping, and doing reasonably well, and then something like this happens, and it's such a beautiful reminder. And then it all comes back to me as if it were yesterday. And I'm helpless with the amount of pain and tears that I sit with.
I don't see that time has diminished the intensity. It's made me able to ache less often, but when it's back, I cry for 6 hours, like tonight, with no reason to stop, other than exhaustion.
I'm a mess tonight. Tomorrow I will drag myself back to something resembling normalcy. Tonight, I mourn my way.