Funniest Negative Comments?

[vagrantx]

It's pretty funny how, after writing an erotic short story, I take it as a badge of honour to have it branded as an "instant boner killer"!

By Anonymous:

Okay, just to be clear, this story is objectively quite amazing, and really puts the 'horror' in 'erotic horror'. But, that being said, holy SHIT have I never lost my boner THIS fast. It's actually kind of ironically convenient that the story was accidentally broken into two parts when it was, because that means people who just want to fap can read the first part and not accidentally page over to, well, this lmao.

 

[thanagar]

From my series "Little Packages", which occasionally ruffled feathers of those of a more conservative bent.

"Not bad for a Trudeau-loving communist."

 

[Deleted member 6666935]

It may not be funny to anyone else, but the comments I received about my last published story complaining they didn’t like the ending. Like, hello? I spent a lot of time in the early part of the story providing every clue how it was going to end, I expected to hear complaints that they figured out the ending early on! Oh, well, it was an experiment anyway.

 

[jhealy55]

"letting a diesel engine run out of fuel is a really bad idea. i see how it's a plot device, but its hurting my suspension of disbelief. in a porn story. just saying."

That was left on chapter 7. Then a few days later, he added chapter 16 as a favorite.

Based on his lack of capitalization, I'm just gonna assume he was typin' that comment with one hand...and it didn't do THAT much damage to suspension of disbelief.

Just sayin'

 

[UnquietDreams]

“That’s what I appreciates about you, Katy.”

Is that what you appreciate about her, Victoria14xs?

 

[UnquietDreams]

On my first story: "I got as far as “looking down I verified “ before I was wetting myself laughing. It’s smut kid, you don’t need to use every word in your thesaurus."

I am sorry, "verified" is now an obscure word?

 

[Stopokochac]

Someone left this on my "Bollywood Dreams" story

"White men are busy being ugly and copulating with dogs so now white guys are trying to miscegenate and racially conquer other races"

 

[Duleigh]

Someone left this on my "Bollywood Dreams" story

"White men are busy being ugly and copulating with dogs so now white guys are trying to miscegenate and racially conquer other races"

Are you sure you didn't stumble into the Politics forum?

 

[onehitwanda]

miscegenate

wow. a new word, and its pejorative!

 

[Stopokochac]

Are you sure you didn't stumble into the Politics forum?

Yeah, 100%. It was a comment on one of my stories

 

[Duleigh]

wow. a new word, and its pejorative!

It's actually a word and it has a history! An English Word, derived from Latin terms, Made in America.
Don't get me started

 

[SimonDoom]

I received this one for one of my 750-word event stories:

Hardy in story line at all the writing again felt forced and there really wasn't any sex involved so I really wouldn't say it was incest when it was just hands used I'm starting to think all your stories is going to feel forced which is not good if you ever hope to keep writing be glad you just started not too many years ago and writing in a word that people are scared to say how they really feel about your stories well I'm different I'm not scared ill be honest with you on your stories every time and sometimes the truth hurts but it is what it is like I said thus far your stories are all forced and trashy I have read enough to know you don't know how to write a decent story even a fantasy story so you shouldn't try until you learn what it takes to write a decent story

This is exactly how the comment was punctuated.

When I pulled up the user's profile, I got the message "This profile is banned."

 

[vagrantx]

This is exactly how the comment was punctuated.

"This profile is banned."

Too bad, would have liked to send them the appendix of A Pickle for the Knowing Ones:

 

[Duleigh]

Too bad, would have like to send them the appendix of A Pickle for the Knowing Ones:

View attachment 2311567

Wow - I remember seeing that in 5th grade English! I think Sister Ann Rita brought this in to show that nuns have a sense of humor too.
Thanks for the memory

 

[StillStunned]

This one was left on Too Cold Not to Fuck:

Good premise.
But sex is sooooo rushed.
Needed a lot more use of hands. Teasing pussy and cock and balls.
Three stars.

Which is curious to me, given the whole premise of the story.

Oh well, hopefully Anonymous read the sequels and found enough use of hands to satisfy their needs.

 

[Sinstories]

I thought this combo of comments was funny... (Ironically, I posted 2 chapters week after being told my break was over and a third and final of the story a week later)

by Anonymous user on 06/14/2023

Another unfinished story????
Damn damn damn damn

COME on please post the continuation
by Anonymous user on 12/29/2023

That is what I like about so many Literotica writers an unfinished story. And this story is really good. I haven't stopped reading it from the beginning until where it ended being that engrossed in it.
You had your break so how about writing another chapter.

by XXXXX on 01/13/2024

Am enjoying this series. I see a couple new parts up, so like all good things some patience needed for the writing to flow. Keep up the good works.
The two anon comments would be surprised I’m sure.

 

[MajorRewrite]

by DeanofMean  on 01/17/2024

Wow! Never thought I would find more despicable characters than Linda & Marc in February story's but these 2 OMG so much more evil, a couple of whores who justify their abuse of the people they supposedly love because "what else could they do" it would cost us money otherwise. So many other options BUT still loved it well written, and I do love the dichotomy you establish with them all thinking they are the good guys despite the blatantly evil actions reducing their vile nature to a banality of disgusting actions. Pimping out her own daughter and thinking it was out of love, I would love to see what happens when she finds out what really happened seriously messed up but wonderful read

Despicable evil whores abuse vile banality disgusting messed up = wonderful read!

 

[joy_of_cooking]

wow. a new word, and its pejorative!

Wait, South Africa had anti-miscegenation laws for more than a decade after the US stopped. Did they just not call them that or something?

 

[onehitwanda]

Wait, South Africa had anti-miscegenation laws for more than a decade after the US stopped. Did they just not call them that or something?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Immorality_Act,_1927
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prohibition_of_Mixed_Marriages_Act,_1949
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_Offences_Act,_1957

We didn't need a special word for absolute, utter, garbage cunthood.

 

[joy_of_cooking]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Immorality_Act,_1927
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prohibition_of_Mixed_Marriages_Act,_1949
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_Offences_Act,_1957

We didn't need a special word for absolute, utter, garbage cunthood.

Sure, in the US they had names like "Ala. code 4189" but people would colloquially or collectively call them "anti-miscegenation laws." That's why I know the word "miscegenation."

So I was surprised that you appeared not to know the word miscegenation before reading this forum thread. I knew SA also had anti-miscegenation laws and I figured South Africans would know the word for the same reason. I guess not?

Anyway, not super important, just surprising to me.

 

[vagrantx]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Immorality_Act,_1927
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prohibition_of_Mixed_Marriages_Act,_1949
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_Offences_Act,_1957

We didn't need a special word for absolute, utter, garbage cunthood.

What is it with people in power always wanting to police whom people can smush genitals with.. So many people, in so many countries, from so many cultures. I wonder if they all truly believe in whatever abominable legislations they pass, or if they are just playing it for the gallery.

Here's another tangentially related fun fact: up until 2013 in Sweden, people wanting to undergo gender reassignment surgery were forcibly sterilized. We're a real bastion of freedom, aren't we.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Compulsory_sterilisation_in_Sweden

 

[jhealy55]

On the plus side, celibacy is not hereditary.

 

[Devinter]

Here's another tangentially related fun fact: up until 2013 in Sweden, people wanting to undergo gender reassignment surgery were forcibly sterilized. We're a real bastion of freedom, aren't we.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Compulsory_sterilisation_in_Sweden

I could be mistaken and misinformed, but wasn't this theoretically done so that someone without the necessary parts to give birth couldn't get pregnant, putting both their own life and that of the baby at extreme risk? Because some people keep the uterus and ovaries, and even when they don't, the procedures aren't usually done at the same time, meaning that you'd have them for a time until the first surgery heals fully if I understand things correctly.

Similarly, if you went from P to V, you probably didn't want any bits left that could produce semen so the sterilization sort of comes "by default" when you have the sex change surgery, no? So then the sterilization is simply so you do not end up with accidental anomalies where someone gets pregnant when they really shouldn't.

The really messed up part wasn't the surgical requirement, but that someone who wanted to legally identify as the opposite gender officially had to go through with the sterilization, even if they didn't have a sex change surgery and thus had all the functioning parts to still become biological parents. Because that's all kinds of messed up.

 

[BlueEyes1969]

You're not bad, but you are excessively chronologically-gifted!

 

[jhealy55]

You're not bad, but you are excessively chronologically-gifted!

Is that like being chronologically well-endowed?...or overly-endowed?