"Fuck"

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"Let them fucking eat cake." - Marie Antoinette
"I have a fucking dream." - Martin Luther King
"I am not fucking a crook." - Richard M. Nixon
"I have not fucking yet begun to fucking fight, you fuckers!" - John Paul Jones
"Heads are going to fucking roll." - Henry VIII
"Any fucking idiot could understand that." - Albert Einstein
"It fucking does too look like her!" - Picasso
"How the fuck did you figure that out?" - Pythagoras
"You want what on the fucking ceiling?" - Michaelangelo
"Fuck a duck." - Walt Disney
"Scattered showers my fucking arse!" - Noah
"Where the fuck did all these fucking Indians come from?" - General Custer
"What fucking iceberg?" - Captain of the Titanic
"Where the fuck have you been?" - Stanley to Livingstone
"Ask not what the fuck your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your fucking country." - John F. Kennedy

(I totally fucking stole this from another website. In case anyone gives a fuck.)

There. I fucking fixed the only one that I saw a problem with. lol
 
"Let them fucking eat cake." - Marie Antoinette
"I have a fucking dream." - Martin Luther King
"I am not a fucking crook." - Richard M. Nixon
"I have not fucking yet begun to fucking fight, you fuckers!" - John Paul Jones
"Heads are going to fucking roll." - Henry VIII
"Any fucking idiot could understand that." - Albert Einstein
"It fucking does too look like her!" - Picasso
"How the fuck did you figure that out?" - Pythagoras
"You want what on the fucking ceiling?" - Michaelangelo
"Fuck a duck." - Walt Disney
"Scattered showers my fucking arse!" - Noah
"Where the fuck did all these fucking Indians come from?" - General Custer
"What fucking iceberg?" - Captain of the Titanic
"Where the fuck have you been?" - Stanley to Livingstone
"Ask not what the fuck your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your fucking country." - John F. Kennedy

(I totally fucking stole this from another website. In case anyone gives a fuck.)

Fucking thank you airstream :D They are great.
 
Fuck you, Universe! Why must you fuck with me again! I could have been fucked next week! Have I used the fuckin' word fuck enough. One more fuck for good fuckin' measure. Fuck!
 
Fuck you, Universe! Why must you fuck with me again! I could have been fucked next week! Have I used the fuckin' word fuck enough. One more fuck for good fuckin' measure. Fuck!

Ah well, it's back to the fucking hairbrush handle for you, lass! The single girl's weapon of last fuckin' resort!

And yes, I fuckin' well do, ya horny wee fucker! (That's in response to your av tag line!)
 
Ah well, it's back to the fucking hairbrush handle for you, lass! The single girl's weapon of last fuckin' resort!

And yes, I fuckin' well do, ya horny wee fucker! (That's in response to your av tag line!)

Fucking hairbrush handle! I'm not fuckin' twelve. I have a fucking vibrator for my self fucking.

I'm fuckin' blushin' because you fuckin' want this horny wee fucker.
 
Fucking hairbrush handle! I'm not fuckin' twelve. I have a fucking vibrator for my self fucking.

I'm fuckin' blushin' because you fuckin' want this horny wee fucker.

Given how you claim to be probably writing, I'm fuckin' wondering how far the fuck down that blush goes?
Crimson coloured cheeks?
Gaudily glowing gorge?
Bonny bloom-bedecked bosom?
(Pretty pinkened pussy?? :eek:)

P.S. re hairbrush handles, my view is probably coloured by the fact that when I've been lonely in a hotel room on business and wanted to stimulate myself back there was well as in the more conventional manner, I've not wanted the rooms next door to hear a buzz through thin walls. A hairbrush handle serves when you've not dared carry anything more interesting in hand luggage on short trips when you're not bothering with hold luggage.
 
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Given how you claim to be probably writing, I'm fuckin' wondering how far the fuck down that blush goes?
Crimson coloured cheeks?
Gaudily glowing gorge?
Bonny bloom-bedecked bosom?
(Pretty pinkened pussy?? :eek:)

I'm fuckin' pink from my fuckin' nose to my fuckin' toes.
 
Fuckin' hot and bothered, eh? Anything I could do to make you shiver with delight, you bonny wee fucker? ;)

I've got the fanfuckintastic Scottish accent in my head that makes me fuckin' hot, so anything you type is going to get this bonny wee fucker fuckin' hot.
 
I've got the fanfuckintastic Scottish accent in my head that makes me fuckin' hot, so anything you type is going to get this bonny wee fucker fuckin' hot.

Tease-Me Tuesday
by EesomeBeastie, April 2010

My fingers dancing up your thigh
Elicit a delicious sigh
Climbing further, up I go
Over flesh as soft as snow
Now I’m almost at my goal
To take you, body, heart and soul!

Fuck, indeed! :devil:
 
Tease-Me Tuesday
by EesomeBeastie, April 2010

My fingers dancing up your thigh
Elicit a delicious sigh
Climbing further, up I go
Over flesh as soft as snow
Now I’m almost at my goal
To take you, body, heart and soul!

Fuck, indeed! :devil:

Well, fuck me. You're a fuckin' poet.
 
Well, fuck me. You're a fuckin' poet.

Now there's a fuckin' invitation! :devil:

But which fuckin' way?

I know:

Doggy
EesomeBeastie, August 2009

You, on all fours in front of me, light from the bedside clock shining on your buttocks
Twin moons above the crevice of your private passion
Beckoning me closer
Hand on cock, I shuffle forward, touch my glans to your opening
The animal smell of your sex wafts up to me

Hands on your hips
“Ready, darling?”
A nod, and I press forwards, feel you open before me
A slow steady pressure and I am deep inside you
Held tight in your damp velvet wonder

A pause to catch our breaths, to adjust to the feeling

Then I start to thrust
In and out, in and out
You tense and push back against me, deepening the penetration
A moan, a whimper, the start of rising fever
I cannot see your face, and that makes it more exciting

“Fuck me, sweetheart, fuck me!” you cry
Sliding hands upwards to your ribs, I grab you tightly and thrust faster still
The slap of my hips against your buttocks, the creak of the bed
A sweet rhythm that hypnotises us
Until all that exists are our bodies and the straining lust that joins us

Your cunt becomes damper still under the onslaught
But the friction grows
I reach down to feel you
My finger slides between your lips and finds your clit
Gently rubbing, you start to gasp, louder and louder still until you scream my name

The pressure builds within me
I cannot hold back, and my orgasm bursts, just as yours does
My semen sprays deep inside you, marking you as mine
A final thrust, our bodies pressed as hard together as we can
We prolong that moment

A drawn out sigh
A gentle withdrawal from your battered cunt
Wiping fluids with discarded nightclothes
A sweaty cuddle in a room reeking of sex
Then sleep
 
Now there's a fuckin' invitation! :devil:

But which fuckin' way?

I know:

Doggy
EesomeBeastie, August 2009

You, on all fours in front of me, light from the bedside clock shining on your buttocks
Twin moons above the crevice of your private passion
Beckoning me closer
Hand on cock, I shuffle forward, touch my glans to your opening
The animal smell of your sex wafts up to me

Hands on your hips
“Ready, darling?”
A nod, and I press forwards, feel you open before me
A slow steady pressure and I am deep inside you
Held tight in your damp velvet wonder

A pause to catch our breaths, to adjust to the feeling

Then I start to thrust
In and out, in and out
You tense and push back against me, deepening the penetration
A moan, a whimper, the start of rising fever
I cannot see your face, and that makes it more exciting

“Fuck me, sweetheart, fuck me!” you cry
Sliding hands upwards to your ribs, I grab you tightly and thrust faster still
The slap of my hips against your buttocks, the creak of the bed
A sweet rhythm that hypnotises us
Until all that exists are our bodies and the straining lust that joins us

Your cunt becomes damper still under the onslaught
But the friction grows
I reach down to feel you
My finger slides between your lips and finds your clit
Gently rubbing, you start to gasp, louder and louder still until you scream my name

The pressure builds within me
I cannot hold back, and my orgasm bursts, just as yours does
My semen sprays deep inside you, marking you as mine
A final thrust, our bodies pressed as hard together as we can
We prolong that moment

A drawn out sigh
A gentle withdrawal from your battered cunt
Wiping fluids with discarded nightclothes
A sweaty cuddle in a room reeking of sex
Then sleep

*sighs* Fuck.
 
That's a good fuck.

Is there such a thing as a bad fuck? ;)

From the perspective of a dry spell of several years, it might seem the answer is 'fuck, no!'

But if you were less fussy you could have got fuckin' rat arsed in a bar, sloped off with the first fucker who leered at you and found out just how fuckin' bad a fuck can be if it's not done for the right reasons.
 
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