For all mothers here

[LaRascasse]

I really have no idea where else to post it where my mother won't find it.

I am 21 years old and my mother is almost 45. In fact, her 45th birthday is in a few days. I have lived away from her for three years now for college. This time, I want to surprise her by flying home for her birthday, but don't know what gift to get her. I have thought of jewelry, but it turns out so has my sister.

So I am asking all the mothers here of a similar age- what gift says "I love you Mom and I am so proud to be your son."?

Innovative ideas welcome.

 

[sunandshadow]

A ticket for a spa or vacation maybe? Does she already have a nook/kindle/ipad thingy? Anything you know she has wanted for a while but doesn't buy for herself because it's not a necessity?

 

[SweetErika]

I'd bet that you coming home and just recognizing her bday and telling her what you told us will be all the present she needs.

If you want to do something extra, how about something that takes more than whipping out your wallet, like making a special photo book or a day of meals for her while you're home (hopefully someone taught you how to cook, or at least follow recipes!)? I know my mom always appreciates thoughtful gifts or things that involve spending time together way more than the latest gizmo or anything money can buy. The right card and personalized message always makes her cry, and for simple occasions, I usually go with that and like a flowering plant in one of her favorite colors so she can enjoy it for months (I VASTLY prefer receiving plants over cut flowers for the same reason). For more involved occasions, I combine things like that with time doing something we both enjoy, a very personalized gift or something that reminds her of my childhood (e.g. a favorite book or poem we shared).

 

[Loverskitten]

My Mom's favorite gifts from me have been when I took her out, kind of a date. Did the theatre a couple times, art shows, and a nice restaurant she'd never been to.
Since she hasn't been able to spend time with you, look into a "date night" with just the two of you.

 

[LaRascasse]

Wow, thanks

This many replies in such a short time. Thank you, all you mothers out there.

Let me give some background to what I am looking for.

Let's start with a simple fact. I love my mother. Growing up, she was the one constant source of encouragement and motivation in my life. I owe all of my achievements to her. She loves me too. Ever since my early teens, I was less of a son and more of her friend. I was her confidante for everything (obviously things that I could process). I cannot count the number of evenings I spent with my head on her lap as she poured out her heart to me.

Then I turned 18 and broke her heart by going to college several states away. We kept in touch through phone and Skype, but that was it. Every year I planned to go home but there was always some app to be made over the summer or some website to be designed over the winter or any of a multitude of reasons that killed my plans.

Maybe it is guilt or the fact that I miss her so much that I turned my schedule upside down to make sure that I would be able to go home this year. Whatever be the stimulus, I will be home for her birthday, Christmas and New Year.

I want to give her the best birthday gift in the world. I want it to be something she will cherish for a long time and something to remember me by. I have saved up enough for a simple necklace, but hope someone here can give me something more creative. She is a special lady and deserves something special on her 45th birthday.

 

[Ellafun]

My son gave me a very pretty silver heart necklace from Things Remembered for my birthday last week. On one side, he had it engraved "Happy Birthday, Mom" and the other side says "Love, ****" (his name). I love it, am wearing it and will cherish it for a long, long time. Just a thought! Good luck!

 

[wicked woman]

I agree that if she hasn't seen you in 3 years, that your trip home to see her is all she probably wants. Make sure to spend time with her when you're back home...don't spend all your time visiting your friends/family.


Reading your posts, I think if you write her a letter and put your thoughts and feelings about her in it that she'll think that's precious.

 

[Ellafun]

I agree that if she hasn't seen you in 3 years, that your trip home to see her is all she probably wants. Make sure to spend time with her when you're back home...don't spend all your time visiting your friends/family.


Reading your posts, I think if you write her a letter and put your thoughts and feelings about her in it that she'll think that's precious.

^^^^^ YES! What WickedWoman said! I love this idea!

 

[cfuhrer]

All of the above posts are right.

You being there is gift enough.
Telling her all that you have said here, maybe in a nice handwritten letter she can keepsake, would be touching beyond measure.
Presenting it at a nice dinner/lunch/brunch would be nice, made by you would be even better.
And if you are considering jewelry something with your birth date or birth stone is a sure hit.

When my sister graduated from high school my parents had been divorced for two years, and my mom had moved heaven and earth to keep our lives as normal as possible. So we pooled our money and bought her a ring with both of our birth stones in it and engraved with our first names and birth dates. She wears it every day.

 

[LaRascasse]

Again wow

Even more ideas.... thank you again.

The poem, the date and the being there, I will do anyway. I just want to know what material gift or experience to get her.

What I have thought of so far-

Samsung Galaxy Tablet
Necklace with heart shaped pendant
A leather bound copy of "Atlas Shrugged" (her favourite novel, she read it out to me when I was younger)
All the seasons of FRIENDS in blu ray (she loves it)

What I really want to give her is something more unique and different. Keep the suggestions coming.

 

[bailadora]

I really like the idea of the photo book. Combine it with the suggestion from WW (ie write the letter and use it in place of one of the picture pages) and you have a pretty stellar gift. At least, it would be in my estimation. It's something she could pull out and review any time she is feeling lonesome for your company.

A few years ago, I did something similar for a really good friend of mine. I used pictures from various time periods in our relationship, interspersing various quotes and snippets of essays on friendship.

There are lots of digital scrapbook companies out there that make this relatively simple to do (ie Shutterfly).

 

[tarnished_hal0]

Spending quality time with her. Go away for a weekend or a few days. I don't know your budget restrictings. It doesn't have to be 5*. Road trip, bus trip, anything goes. If you have time, then maybe a scrap book for your childhood.

 

[In Anticipation]

Even more ideas.... thank you again.

The poem, the date and the being there, I will do anyway. I just want to know what material gift or experience to get her.

What I have thought of so far-

Samsung Galaxy Tablet
Necklace with heart shaped pendant
A leather bound copy of "Atlas Shrugged" (her favourite novel, she read it out to me when I was younger)
All the seasons of FRIENDS in blu ray (she loves it)

What I really want to give her is something more unique and different. Keep the suggestions coming.

I don't think this is about the money you spend. The box set of 'Friends' sounds a good idea. Digressing, was it actually filmed in good enough quality for blu ray? When the re-runs come up on TV here it seems pretty poor quality even for standard definition, more like VHS quality! I would think DVD would be fine . . .

 

[DarkGrayStar]

Did you go home for her birthday?

Your original post on 11/29 said it was a few days away, so did you make it home? What did you decide to do for a gift?

Inquiring minds want to know!!!

 

[AevaLynn]

My oldest son is 19 now and in college. I can tell you that just coming home is the greatest gift of all ! your time is more valuable than anything else you can give her ! I would suggest you take her out on the town, maybe for a nice dinner and a movie or event that she loves, play, ballet, comedy show, concert ? Taking her to get a photo done together would also be special for her .

 

[Sassymama]

Once I gave my mother a picture of her and me. I had it professionally framed along side a poem I wrote especially for her. She cherished it until the day she died. It was always by her bedside.

It is not about how much money you spend on her, but how much time you spend with her. Time is our most valuable commodity. Use it wisely and never take it for granted. Many women will cross your path in your lifetime, but you will only have one Mother.

 

[sweettreat601]

Arrange for a photographer to do a portrait sitting for the two of you. Not the formal "studio" portraits, but some of the popular, more casual "outdoorsy" type. Those relaxed settings really bring out the true essence of a relationship. As a mom, that would be a gift I'd cherish forever.

 

[LaRascasse]

Your original post on 11/29 said it was a few days away, so did you make it home? What did you decide to do for a gift?

Inquiring minds want to know!!!

It's on the 15th. I make it back home on the 14th.

I have made some kind of decision what to get but am still open to more suggestions. She doesn't even know that I am coming home, let alone getting her something. It's going to be a huge surprise!!

 

[LaRascasse]

Sorry for the delay.

This is a rather belated thanks to everyone who gave their valuable suggestions on how to give a special person a special birthday. I can safely say, she loved it!! I know this because that many tears of joy are damn hard to fake.

So a massive vote of thanks to SweetErika, AevaLynn, sunandshadow, Loverskitten, Ellafun, wickedwoman, cfuhrer, bailadora, tarnished__halo, In_Anticipation, Sassymamma, DarkGrayStar, sweettreat601 (hope I got everybody).

Thank you for this outpouring of maternal advice. My mother has no idea I am on Lit (and with good reason), but I am sure she would want to thank you as well.

Carpe diem
-LaRascasse

 

[SweetErika]

What did you end up getting your mom, LR?