First time anal sex
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Islander55
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Lots of lube and you need to relax and let it in.
alabasterbreasts
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I would recommend if you can practicing solo.
Buy some different buttplugs (there are training kits), get a good lube.
Masturbate, enjoy some porn, orgasm while you have a plug in.
Have him use toys and other things on you.
Relax and enjoy and soon you will be craving something more than a toy.
Buy some different buttplugs (there are training kits), get a good lube.
Masturbate, enjoy some porn, orgasm while you have a plug in.
Have him use toys and other things on you.
Relax and enjoy and soon you will be craving something more than a toy.
Kumquatqueen
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Lots of lube.
Play with fingers (his or your own), get used to 2 or 3 of those.
More lube and more slow and careful than you think.
It's not so much about relaxing as pushing out like you're having a shit, to enable an opening.
Butt plugs can be fun but don't bother with ones the width of s finger.
Enemas seem to be an American thing - I've never known anyone use one just to make anal cleaner, and if you eat plenty of fibre then it shouldn't be dirty anyway.
Make sure you've got a good respectful guy who won't ignore any pain, and enjoy.
Play with fingers (his or your own), get used to 2 or 3 of those.
More lube and more slow and careful than you think.
It's not so much about relaxing as pushing out like you're having a shit, to enable an opening.
Butt plugs can be fun but don't bother with ones the width of s finger.
Enemas seem to be an American thing - I've never known anyone use one just to make anal cleaner, and if you eat plenty of fibre then it shouldn't be dirty anyway.
Make sure you've got a good respectful guy who won't ignore any pain, and enjoy.
ToPleaseHim
RedVelvet IYKYK
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It helps to be really turned on and he should move slowly. My first time was with someone who was very experienced and I'm not sure that a better first time exists. Leading up to our meeting, I did use butt plugs a bit, just wearing them a few times a week for a few hours each time to get used to it. I never could do more than the size medium. You need lots of lube with butt plugs. You also need lots of lube with a dick, with any anal play.
That first experience started with him going down on me and making me cum. He played with my ass all along, one finger, then two, then three - stretching me and slowly getting me used to the feeling. We were in missionary position when he entered me (he wanted to see my face) and he went slowly and then paused inside to let me get used to it.
I would encourage him to go slow like this. It made for a very positive first time for me and left me more than eager to do it again.
That first experience started with him going down on me and making me cum. He played with my ass all along, one finger, then two, then three - stretching me and slowly getting me used to the feeling. We were in missionary position when he entered me (he wanted to see my face) and he went slowly and then paused inside to let me get used to it.
I would encourage him to go slow like this. It made for a very positive first time for me and left me more than eager to do it again.
surferjake
Really Experienced
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Yes, this.. though, I would say that you should have multiple anal play sessions before penetration.. so, fingers, small toys, etc..
And if he wants to have yours, you should be able to play with his! Might help him understand that he needs to take his time, and warm up to it.
And if he wants to have yours, you should be able to play with his! Might help him understand that he needs to take his time, and warm up to it.
KimGordon67
Rampant feminist
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This is just going to echo a lot of previous posts but ....
Lots of lube.
Relax. (In all honesty, I almost only have good anal when I've had a few drinks, and after a fair bit of other sex, so I'm super relaxed.)
Take it very slowly. He needs to check in with you that you're OK.
Try to not clench. With vaginal sex, I think we often tighten (either unconsciously or deliberately), because that feel good for everyone involved. With anal, I try to consciously not-clench. Sometimes a really focused deep breath out and relaxing everything helps with that.
It's going to feel a bit weird, and maybe a little uncomfortable. If you can handle that, it's worth riding through it until things feel good. (If things don't feel good, just stop. If it actually hurts, just stop.)
I don't even get into 'hardcore fucking' with anal - it's usually a much slower thing. Partly I find anything more a bit uncomfortable, and partly the whole feeling can be a bit overwhelming (in a good way), and I just want to feel that, rather than 'being fucked', if that makes sense. I find my orgasm is super-intense.
I find the classic porn position of on-the-knees doggy style doesn't work. Usually we've both been lying on our sides, with me spooned back into him. The most recent time (with a new guy) was a bit more like the porn scenario, but I was on my stomach. I don't think I could relax enough if I had my arse up in the air (but that's probably just me).
Try to not worry about mess. I've never had anything on the sheets etc. But it's always showers for everyone straight afterwards. Not that I've ever really noticed any particular mess - it just seems like a good idea. But if there is any mess, that's just something that happens.
Lots of lube.
Relax. (In all honesty, I almost only have good anal when I've had a few drinks, and after a fair bit of other sex, so I'm super relaxed.)
Take it very slowly. He needs to check in with you that you're OK.
Try to not clench. With vaginal sex, I think we often tighten (either unconsciously or deliberately), because that feel good for everyone involved. With anal, I try to consciously not-clench. Sometimes a really focused deep breath out and relaxing everything helps with that.
It's going to feel a bit weird, and maybe a little uncomfortable. If you can handle that, it's worth riding through it until things feel good. (If things don't feel good, just stop. If it actually hurts, just stop.)
I don't even get into 'hardcore fucking' with anal - it's usually a much slower thing. Partly I find anything more a bit uncomfortable, and partly the whole feeling can be a bit overwhelming (in a good way), and I just want to feel that, rather than 'being fucked', if that makes sense. I find my orgasm is super-intense.
I find the classic porn position of on-the-knees doggy style doesn't work. Usually we've both been lying on our sides, with me spooned back into him. The most recent time (with a new guy) was a bit more like the porn scenario, but I was on my stomach. I don't think I could relax enough if I had my arse up in the air (but that's probably just me).
Try to not worry about mess. I've never had anything on the sheets etc. But it's always showers for everyone straight afterwards. Not that I've ever really noticed any particular mess - it just seems like a good idea. But if there is any mess, that's just something that happens.
S
supercollider00
Guest
I'll also repeat a few things: lube, lube, lube. And how others have mentioned not clenching and actually pushing out (opening) helps a lot. Try to relax as much as possible. Just understanding this made anal go from very painful to incredibly pleasurable for me. Practice a bit on your own if you have a chance
As for cleanliness, if you have a good diet and are generally clean it's not much of an issue. If you've had a bowel movement earlier you probably won't need an enema. If you're very scared about cleanliness then do an enema, but they're not necessary. There's rarely been a mess, but I mean it's to be expected to a certain extent when going that way.
Also.... BREATHE deep if it hurts or he goes a bit too deep for you. It helps a lot.
As for cleanliness, if you have a good diet and are generally clean it's not much of an issue. If you've had a bowel movement earlier you probably won't need an enema. If you're very scared about cleanliness then do an enema, but they're not necessary. There's rarely been a mess, but I mean it's to be expected to a certain extent when going that way.
Also.... BREATHE deep if it hurts or he goes a bit too deep for you. It helps a lot.
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Bigboobbabe
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I love anal play and sex, but for me conditions have to be right.
Make sure you are not the least bit constipated. Don't use an enema kit, but some mirilax for a few days helps.
You need to be soft and stretched for 2 to 3 fingers. Lots of lube, plugs help.
A little preparation H creme or cleansing pads will take the edge off the discomfort and shrink any swelling.
When your partner is pushing in, you should breathe out. It naturally opens you wider.
Make sure your partner stops at the first resistance to let you accommodate. I often orgasm at that point and clench tight. It's worth his delay if he enjoys the orgasm with you.
After is what I consider the worst.
Your first trip to the bathroom is a mini enema from the lube and his cum.
And it may happen in the bed. Be prepared. It is natural and there is no shame.
I typically get constipated after. Mirilax, not a stool softener helps.
And let me know it goes. I have other pointers if you need a specific assist.
Barb
Make sure you are not the least bit constipated. Don't use an enema kit, but some mirilax for a few days helps.
You need to be soft and stretched for 2 to 3 fingers. Lots of lube, plugs help.
A little preparation H creme or cleansing pads will take the edge off the discomfort and shrink any swelling.
When your partner is pushing in, you should breathe out. It naturally opens you wider.
Make sure your partner stops at the first resistance to let you accommodate. I often orgasm at that point and clench tight. It's worth his delay if he enjoys the orgasm with you.
After is what I consider the worst.
Your first trip to the bathroom is a mini enema from the lube and his cum.
And it may happen in the bed. Be prepared. It is natural and there is no shame.
I typically get constipated after. Mirilax, not a stool softener helps.
And let me know it goes. I have other pointers if you need a specific assist.
BarbUse fingers first, one then two, three. Go slow the first time. It will hurt going in. If it's too much have him pull out until the pain subsides, add lube. The second entrance will be easier. Eventually, there is enormous pleasure in receiving anal. And, it gets easier and easier. When I'm fully warmed up, I now take my wife's hand and absolutely love it.
