So last night I had my first threesome with a friend from work and his hot wife! It was my first time being with another woman (other than making out with friends). It was amazing, but my husband has no clue. He is very vanilla when it comes to sex but i am so horny all the time and i need more.....How can I talk to him about being more open sexually without ruining our marriage?
First threesome
- Thread starter Willcum4u
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SgtSpiderMan
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Did you at least invite him?
D
DarkPleasures
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Well, I'm sure if you admit to your husband that you cheated on him with a man from work and his wife you'll open his eyes.
inwinetheres
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hahaha, but hes vanilla! lol
SgtSpiderMan
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What if you have the wife seduce him?
D
DarkPleasures
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That won't happen. Sorry.
Hhmmmm....that's a great idea!
SgtSpiderMan
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My mind is brilliant when it comes to solving sex problems.
harry8copeland
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Maybe it would help if you explained a little more... (Besides, we all want the juicy details!). Was this a planned thing? Spur of the moment? Quick fuck in the back room at work or you three got a room at the Hilton or went to their house. What did you do with each partner? Were you with both ALL the time or you fucked the dude while his wife was in the shower.
Because, let's face it, details matter.
Ok details.....the guy and I have been coworkers and friends for many years. We always meet for lunch, drinks, whatever but it was always platonic. About six weeks ago my husband started working late every day and I was really lonely and very horny. I know women hit their sexual peak at 35 but this is ridiculous....all I think about is sex. My husband has been out working everyday for about a month so I masturbate daily....ok several times a day.
So we met for happy hour after work and for the first time we started talking about sex and he shared that several hot women at work told him that they wanted to fuck him. I guess I felt hot, jealous, and definitely interested.... We met for drinks the next week but I was still unsure about being with someone outside my marriage....so after a few drinks we went to his car in the parking lot and we masterbated together.
The next time we hung out I blew him in his office, twice. I love sucking dick but my husband thinks that it is degrading to women....ugh. Over the last month I've gone down on him a few times and we've fucked twice....always in our offices! Ha
He and his wife have had several threesomes. I have become friendly with her and the three of us have gone out drinking twice.....but Friday night we all knew it was going to happen. He had talked to both of us about it but I never spoke to her about it. We all went to their bedroom after way too many drinks. She started kissing me and took off my bra. We were laying on the bed, kissing and grinding. Unfortunately it was my time of the month so when she tried to go down on me, I flipped her over and went down on her. It was my first time but it was incredible. I licked her pussy and fingered her until she came....it was beyond hot. He laid next to us watching and stroking his cock.
Then we sucked his cock together...super fun. He then fucked his wife while I watched. I used a vibrator and came while they fucked. We all slept naked in their bed. In the morning he was fondling me under the blanket while his wife slept and I sucked his cock while she took a shower.... It was not awkward in the morning because we are all friends. I cannot wait to hang out with them again...looking forward to her licking my clit and having her watch her husband fuck me from behind while i lick her!
So I'm a married woman who likes girls and threesomes.....but my husband has no idea and possibly want to leave me if he knew. I feel like imam leading a double life. I have my cake and eating it too....that never lasts forever......thoughts?
So we met for happy hour after work and for the first time we started talking about sex and he shared that several hot women at work told him that they wanted to fuck him. I guess I felt hot, jealous, and definitely interested.... We met for drinks the next week but I was still unsure about being with someone outside my marriage....so after a few drinks we went to his car in the parking lot and we masterbated together.
The next time we hung out I blew him in his office, twice. I love sucking dick but my husband thinks that it is degrading to women....ugh. Over the last month I've gone down on him a few times and we've fucked twice....always in our offices! Ha
He and his wife have had several threesomes. I have become friendly with her and the three of us have gone out drinking twice.....but Friday night we all knew it was going to happen. He had talked to both of us about it but I never spoke to her about it. We all went to their bedroom after way too many drinks. She started kissing me and took off my bra. We were laying on the bed, kissing and grinding. Unfortunately it was my time of the month so when she tried to go down on me, I flipped her over and went down on her. It was my first time but it was incredible. I licked her pussy and fingered her until she came....it was beyond hot. He laid next to us watching and stroking his cock.
Then we sucked his cock together...super fun. He then fucked his wife while I watched. I used a vibrator and came while they fucked. We all slept naked in their bed. In the morning he was fondling me under the blanket while his wife slept and I sucked his cock while she took a shower.... It was not awkward in the morning because we are all friends. I cannot wait to hang out with them again...looking forward to her licking my clit and having her watch her husband fuck me from behind while i lick her!
So I'm a married woman who likes girls and threesomes.....but my husband has no idea and possibly want to leave me if he knew. I feel like imam leading a double life. I have my cake and eating it too....that never lasts forever......thoughts?
DallasDonna
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What if she (without her husband) came over for a visit while your husband was there, flirted with the both of you, then you tell the husband (alone) if he was interested, you would be ok with it, and would even join if he wanted?
Then, if he said no, you would know there was no chance he would ever be open to it.
To be honest, I think you are playing with fire, what you are describing is not uncommon, where one spouse has different ideas about sex then another, and in that sense I can understand where you are.
Unfortunately a lot of people are in that position and it isn't easy,especially if one partner's ideas about sex are kind of old fashioned (it is kind of cute that he thinks a woman giving oral sex to a man is degrading, in the sense that he actually cares about the woman's feelings, but it also kind of makes me wonder where he learned that, it sounds either like far too many people's religious beliefs or certain aspects of 1970's feminism that was pretty anti sex)......
If you love your husband then having your cake and eating it too is not going to be possible, eventually this is going to get back to him. With one event like this it may not be likely, but someone is going to get wind of it, the husband or wife might mention it to others, someone gets bitchy, or hubby notices something different, that you are spending more time with this guy and his wife (and coworkers are absolutely the worst people to be doing this with IMO in the sense that spouses already can suspect coworkers since they are a common source of cheating). And if your description is correct, he is going to be like the guys in the loving wives stories where there is no wiggle room, it was cheating and he would be gone.....
Sexual incompatibility is a major part of marital issues many couples face, so you aren't alone, and quite frankly I would be the last person to judge you or give you the old crap about marriage being a sacred covenant, that sex is between only husband and wife", how and where they have sex should be up to the couple, as long as they are both cool with it.
I think what others have suggested, about having the wife seduce him, for example, is not the way to go, I think he will get suspicious if the wife comes onto him like that and you seem untroubled by it, he will smell something, I guarantee it, plus if his sexual notions come from religious teaching or some sort of rigid morality, even if tempted he won't go along with it.
To be honest, I think you really need to be talking to your husband about your sex drive, fantasies, whatever, try and get him to open up . For one thing, are you sure sex has been working for him? Without sounding like Iago, if he is working late hours for the last 6 weeks, are you sure that is a demand of the job or could he be unhappy? Did your sex life dwindle before he started working late? I obviously don't know him, but could you both be experiencing the same thing but not talking about it?
Here is my take, if you think you love your husband enough to want to stay with him, then don't do another threesome (you prob will I suspect, given how exuberant you feel, but keep in mind that likely soon you will get the guilts over it, especially if you keep doing it, IME). That glow is incredible, it is like when you first start having great sex; but here, too, you are compartmentalizing yourself, you are creating in a sense a 'different you' where it is okay to do things like this, but the problem is you end up in conflict with yourself and eventually it will become evident to your husband, either because you grow more distant or because you are doing things like being out all the time, when he notices, and the shit will hit the fan and the 'real you' that loves him, will be left to face the consequences....
Rather, start talking to him about what you need, that you love him and you want to rekindle your sex lives. Ideally he would agree to see a sex and relationship counselor to help bring you both closer to being on the same page, maybe if a woman counselor told him that oral sex either way is not degrading he would be willing to open up about that, or maybe he and you both would open up about what you want. Guys like you describe your hubby prob have fantasies, too, but are ashamed to talk about them because they were brought up learning those are 'wrong' or immoral or whatever....maybe working like that he would learn to open up, too.
If he doesn't, and you really need more, then you may be faced with either a)living a life with him where you aren't satisfied or b) have to leave him as much as you may love him. Doing what you are doing seems the best of both worlds, but I think you are going to find it will lead you to a place where you have neither world, where your marriage will crash and burn when he finds out (and as I said, your brief description he seems pretty rigid and straight in his beliefs and will see this as a horrible betrayal) and where you will feel so rotten and miserable when it crashes you will find, at least for a while, that the allure of crazy sex dies...
AT least if you try to work with your H, and he doesn't/can't follow, you made the attempt, and if the marriage ends you can look yourself in the mirror and know you tried.
Unfortunately a lot of people are in that position and it isn't easy,especially if one partner's ideas about sex are kind of old fashioned (it is kind of cute that he thinks a woman giving oral sex to a man is degrading, in the sense that he actually cares about the woman's feelings, but it also kind of makes me wonder where he learned that, it sounds either like far too many people's religious beliefs or certain aspects of 1970's feminism that was pretty anti sex)......
If you love your husband then having your cake and eating it too is not going to be possible, eventually this is going to get back to him. With one event like this it may not be likely, but someone is going to get wind of it, the husband or wife might mention it to others, someone gets bitchy, or hubby notices something different, that you are spending more time with this guy and his wife (and coworkers are absolutely the worst people to be doing this with IMO in the sense that spouses already can suspect coworkers since they are a common source of cheating). And if your description is correct, he is going to be like the guys in the loving wives stories where there is no wiggle room, it was cheating and he would be gone.....
Sexual incompatibility is a major part of marital issues many couples face, so you aren't alone, and quite frankly I would be the last person to judge you or give you the old crap about marriage being a sacred covenant, that sex is between only husband and wife", how and where they have sex should be up to the couple, as long as they are both cool with it.
I think what others have suggested, about having the wife seduce him, for example, is not the way to go, I think he will get suspicious if the wife comes onto him like that and you seem untroubled by it, he will smell something, I guarantee it, plus if his sexual notions come from religious teaching or some sort of rigid morality, even if tempted he won't go along with it.
To be honest, I think you really need to be talking to your husband about your sex drive, fantasies, whatever, try and get him to open up . For one thing, are you sure sex has been working for him? Without sounding like Iago, if he is working late hours for the last 6 weeks, are you sure that is a demand of the job or could he be unhappy? Did your sex life dwindle before he started working late? I obviously don't know him, but could you both be experiencing the same thing but not talking about it?
Here is my take, if you think you love your husband enough to want to stay with him, then don't do another threesome (you prob will I suspect, given how exuberant you feel, but keep in mind that likely soon you will get the guilts over it, especially if you keep doing it, IME). That glow is incredible, it is like when you first start having great sex; but here, too, you are compartmentalizing yourself, you are creating in a sense a 'different you' where it is okay to do things like this, but the problem is you end up in conflict with yourself and eventually it will become evident to your husband, either because you grow more distant or because you are doing things like being out all the time, when he notices, and the shit will hit the fan and the 'real you' that loves him, will be left to face the consequences....
Rather, start talking to him about what you need, that you love him and you want to rekindle your sex lives. Ideally he would agree to see a sex and relationship counselor to help bring you both closer to being on the same page, maybe if a woman counselor told him that oral sex either way is not degrading he would be willing to open up about that, or maybe he and you both would open up about what you want. Guys like you describe your hubby prob have fantasies, too, but are ashamed to talk about them because they were brought up learning those are 'wrong' or immoral or whatever....maybe working like that he would learn to open up, too.
If he doesn't, and you really need more, then you may be faced with either a)living a life with him where you aren't satisfied or b) have to leave him as much as you may love him. Doing what you are doing seems the best of both worlds, but I think you are going to find it will lead you to a place where you have neither world, where your marriage will crash and burn when he finds out (and as I said, your brief description he seems pretty rigid and straight in his beliefs and will see this as a horrible betrayal) and where you will feel so rotten and miserable when it crashes you will find, at least for a while, that the allure of crazy sex dies...
AT least if you try to work with your H, and he doesn't/can't follow, you made the attempt, and if the marriage ends you can look yourself in the mirror and know you tried.
blksoldier
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well said its a very sticky situation
it takes a lot of trust. how would you feel if he did the same to you? I have been in your shoes, almost in the same scenairo. I have this couple that we use to have foursomes with and I had several threesomes with thim without my wife. Was a lot of fun, but wife had problems due to the girl looked sexy. It was a lot of fun and still is...... have you guys done any pictures? I have another girl that is in your shoes, we have fun from time to time, she wants to explore and have fun, but tied down.
What kind of guy doesn't want a blow job?Njlauren.....thanks for your advice. I think you are right about everything, but now I just have to get myself to actually sit down and talk to hubby. I'm just scared that he will be upset that I didn't share these feelings and thoughts earlier in our relationship since we have been together for 7 years. Unfortunately I can't say no to another night out with this couple and since this will prob be my only chance to have a threesome I am going to have fun.....right or wrong.
I sort of hope that I feel guilty enough to stop soon, but in my case absence is not making my heart grow fonder.....I haven't spent qt with hubby in weeks which compounds my feelings of loneliness and constant need for attention. I know I sound pathetic, but it is a need that I have and someone has to fulfill it....
Any suggestions on how to start a conversation about my thoughts of other women without making him feel inadequate or that I am gay?!
nfrrdscnnr1
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happy
Been down the dissatisfied road and have the tee shirt to prove it. My reading of the deal is that you might want to think about finding happiness and contentment in the long run for yourself. Is dalliance with another guy and his wife enough? It is pretty unlikely that you'll be able to maintain a relationship with those two over the long run, would you agree? You feel lonely and need attention from your husband. When you were not lonely and got attention from him, was that enough for you? Do you have a need that cannot be met? If so, why do you suppose that might be?
Been down the dissatisfied road and have the tee shirt to prove it. My reading of the deal is that you might want to think about finding happiness and contentment in the long run for yourself. Is dalliance with another guy and his wife enough? It is pretty unlikely that you'll be able to maintain a relationship with those two over the long run, would you agree? You feel lonely and need attention from your husband. When you were not lonely and got attention from him, was that enough for you? Do you have a need that cannot be met? If so, why do you suppose that might be?
subwannabe
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You really need to sit down with the hubby and talk about this without admitting to everything.
Somehowyou
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You have opened Pandora's Box. I don't know what to to tell you. Would you have preferred that your husband was there at the 3sum? I don't think so.
Sex with your husband has grown predictable, dull, and vanilla. You can't go back to this. It will never satisfy you. The one hope is that your hubby is just as dissatisfied as you. Maybe he fantasizes all the time about seeing someone else fuck you or having 3sums or fucking someone else? Be careful when you talk to him because he probably won't allow himself to admit it. He will just get on his moral high horse. Talking about this stuff is just not that easy and takes tremendous maturity, honesty, unselfishness, trust...the risk is humiliation and turning your nice predictable life on its end.
Some things are better left a secret.
Sex with your husband has grown predictable, dull, and vanilla. You can't go back to this. It will never satisfy you. The one hope is that your hubby is just as dissatisfied as you. Maybe he fantasizes all the time about seeing someone else fuck you or having 3sums or fucking someone else? Be careful when you talk to him because he probably won't allow himself to admit it. He will just get on his moral high horse. Talking about this stuff is just not that easy and takes tremendous maturity, honesty, unselfishness, trust...the risk is humiliation and turning your nice predictable life on its end.
Some things are better left a secret.
So it did happen again...I have had sex with just him and another threesome last weekend with him and his wife! My hubby still has no idea and has been working so much that I haven't had the right opportunity to speak to him about improving our sex life. Now the guy from work wants to know if I would have a threesome with him.....but without his wife. I am interested but would rather do a MFF than a MFM. he has a male friend, who I met but I'm not 100% into.... Neither of us know a hot girl who would be interested and could keep it confidential.
Ladies any feedback on your MFM experiences and how it went would be appreciated. Did you feel used afterwards?! Also how can you find someone interested in a threesome?!
Ladies any feedback on your MFM experiences and how it went would be appreciated. Did you feel used afterwards?! Also how can you find someone interested in a threesome?!
Roxanne_Sumner
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I have an ongoing MMF that started as a MFM - if you aren't 100% into both partners, forget it! You've got to be able to trust or you will feel used.
NightL
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to quote a recent frequent user of the following words - "hmmm, interesting"
at least you have not gone down the usual path of "PM me, Ladies only - sorry guys" - yet
When there is a mis-match in sexual attitudes and needs it can/will lead to tension in a marriage. Been there done that. It would not easy to open doors between you and your hubby if indeed he is quite vanilla and has set boundaries relative to sexual issues. Just telling him that you and he aren't compatible ant that HE needs to change won't work and will probably cause more tension. Certainly don't let on that you've had this threesome and I can tell you from bitter experience that if you keep "cheating" there is a high risk that he'll find out somehow, someday and it could well end your marriage.
There are books and videos about expanding sexual horizons. Some are pretty much quack publications and defacto porn. However, some could be helpful in helping him expand his horizons if you approach it with sensitivity. Do you know why he's so vanilla? Upbringing? Religious beliefs? Personal insecurity or fear of one sort or another? Jealousy? Fear of losing you? There are many things that form someone's sexual agenda and it's often difficult to see the world through their eyes just as it's difficult for them to see the world through yours.
I went through years of that and couldn't understand how my wife didn't "agree" with me on many issues when many other women apparently did. It took an emotional bomb going off and marriage counseling to find out that my wife wasn't as vanilla as I thought but that she didn't trust me enough to reveal herself for fear that I would negatively judge her. Here for all those years I saw it as the reverse. Sometimes it takes a third party, a referee, a counselor to allow both parties to approach each other feeling safe and protected. You might offer that, ie a therapist or counselor, as an option if he doesn't want to listen to your side of the story. I knew one woman who ended up (after years of trying) telling her husband if he didn't want to meet her halfway or try to understand her and try to work with her, she would have to leave and find a more compatible partner. It shook him off his foundation. However, she had exhausted all avenues and I wouldn't suggest taking that sort of approach right off. Good luck with this. Closed door marriages don't make for good marriages.
Ellafun
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Can someone please explain to me how someone just happens to have a threesome and then decides to make it their first post on Literotica? Every time I've had a deviant sexual experience, the first thing I think of is, "God! I wonder if there's a website where I can post about my exploits!" WTF?
