Finger up the bum, too much for some?

[ScrappyPaperDoodler]

My stories appeal to heterosexual men who know what to expect from their stroke material. However, there are a few things I'd like to change up going forward and I'm 99% sure it'll cause a few readers to flee.

1) My male characters should be just as sexy as my female characters and that'll see me get a bit steamier about how I describe their appearance and the way sex scenes play out.
2) Part of the fun of an MMF threesome (or any other group sex with 2+ guys) is that they're feeding off each other. You can write (and I probably have written) such scenes where the men have zero interaction with each other. They're basically floating penises detached from bodies.
3) Kissing after blowjobs. It happens and there's nothing wrong with it, but I've always purposely avoided it because I had some imaginary commenter in mind.

Okay, so there's all that and then there's point number four and the title of this post... The finger in the bum in instances where the bum in question belongs to a gent. Well, it could be a finger or a tongue or even a toy. Again, the imaginary commenter is shouting at me.

I'm 100% resolved that these things will be included in future stories, but I'm also 100% sure it'll upset maybe a large portion of readers. Maybe I'm wrong...

To what extent are certain people (straight male readers) still averse to this sort of thing?

I mean, there's an episode of the Sopranos where a guy performing oral sex (on his wife)is painted as undermining his masculinity. Sure, some people still think like that, but it feels like it's now a small minority and you certainly won't catch flack for putting a story about it on Lit.

 

[Kumquatqueen]

If the two guys don't cross swords or anything else, it's mfm rather than mmf. Tagging will help adjust expectations (I sometimes list my tags at the top of a story, if I know they will deter some readers who wouldn't like the content - saves their time, encourages readers who may like it).

Some readers get put off by all sorts of weird things. Others enjoy them. There's bound to be a demand for men enjoying bum fun who aren't written as sissy/gay/submissive (and for those who are!)

 

[ScrappyPaperDoodler]

If the two guys don't cross swords or anything else, it's mfm rather than mmf.

That's super helpful. I never knew the difference!

 

[OverconfidentSarcasm]

That's super helpful. I never knew the difference!

I'd wager most of the readers won't know the difference either, but I could be wrong, of course.

To answer your initial question, though: Unless your audience is Bi or gay, I'd abstain from male butt stuff. Simple as that.

How many women do you, personally, know, who are into anal play? Now divide that number by ten, and that's probably the number of "straight male readers" who appreciate reading about prostate stimulation. To be frank, most would be concerned about suddenly shitting the bed if it was done to them.

You'll find straight men having 'mfm 'threesomes, but they won't touch the other guy. And, no, it's not because they're homophobes or anything. It's because, if you're a straight male, dicks don't do it for you. So you have no desire to touch them either.

 

[Rob_Royale]

If you encourage people to read the tags in an Authors Note and include prostate massage in the tags, your fine. You've done what you can to give the reader a heads up, and if they complain don't sweat it, you did your job.

I include kissing after a blow job in nearly every story. I've never had a complaint.

 

[ScrappyPaperDoodler]

How many women do you, personally, know, who are into anal play? Now divide that number by ten, and that's probably the number of "straight male readers" who appreciate reading about prostate stimulation. To be frank, most would be concerned about suddenly shitting the bed if it was done to them.

Fair enough.

On the other hand, most stories that involve anal (in categories outside of anal) don't really explore the subject in depth, so to speak. But I do think it would feel like a more foreign phenomenon to a male character in a hetrosexual setting. Writing the lead-up may lead to more issues than just jumping straight into the action because it's generally speaking out of the ordinary.

 

[OffNSFW]

More straight men need to get fucked up the ass, tbh. Builds character.

 

[LMWM321]

Liking a finger (or dildo) up the bum does not mean a guy is gay. ..But refusing to try it (receiving) because you think it might suggest you're gay does imply a bit of homophobia. Gay or straight is defined by what gender you're attracted to. ..Not by the sexual activities themselves.

One of my stories "Sharing My Wife Michelle" is MFM and there is no bi-sexuality at all. ..No guy on guy. And a fair-amount of butt-stuff.

https://www.literotica.com/s/sharing-my-wife-michelle

 

[Devinter]

If you encourage people to read the tags in an Authors Note and include prostate massage in the tags, your fine. You've done what you can to give the reader a heads up, and if they complain don't sweat it, you did your job.

Well said. @ScrappyPaperDoodler - You might still run into one or two thick-as-bricks people who complain, because I've had someone read one of my stories that has "Little sister" in the title and is in the Incest category, tagged appropriately, complain that it contained incest. Like, who would've thought? But you're going to prevent most of the negative backlash because people who aren't into what you're writing will just click out of the story.

And, no, it's not because they're homophobes or anything. It's because, if you're a straight male, dicks don't do it for you. So you have no desire to touch them either.

This is also true though, and something I find that many people who are a little bit "bi-curious" struggle with understanding. If you're not into it, you're not into it. It's weird and/or gross to people and that's perfectly fine. A gay man might feel the same way if he had to touch a woman, for instance. What turns us on and off is very individual, and if you try to force something onto someone - even in a story - that they are not into, they will react accordingly. The same goes for particular sex acts too. If the reader isn't into humiliation or non-con for instance, then they will feel uncomfortable encountering it in your story. It will detract value. The same thing applies to @ScrappyPaperDoodler 's question. Many readers wouldn't necessarily be bothered by the scene you have in mind, but it would detract value, and reduce their arousal - possibly all the way to zero. So tag your stories accordingly or be prepared for the negative backlash.

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

More straight men need to get fucked up the ass, tbh. Builds character.

One of a long list of things I think straight men would enjoy if they let themselves.

 

[EmilyMiller]

If the two guys don't cross swords or anything else, it's mfm rather than mmf. Tagging will help adjust expectations (I sometimes list my tags at the top of a story, if I know they will deter some readers who wouldn't like the content - saves their time, encourages readers who may like it).

Some readers get put off by all sorts of weird things. Others enjoy them. There's bound to be a demand for men enjoying bum fun who aren't written as sissy/gay/submissive (and for those who are!)

I’ve never understood the TLAs - is there a use manual somewhere?

Emily

 

[onehitwanda]

in before the ban hammer.

 

[Omenainen]

Okay, so there's all that and then there's point number four and the title of this post... The finger in the bum in instances where the bum in question belongs to a gent. Well, it could be a finger or a tongue or even a toy. Again, the imaginary commenter is shouting at me.

Fuck your imaginary commenter in the butt with a big fat man finger!

 

[ScrappyPaperDoodler]

In the context of your personal sex life, I understand having strict sexual preferences. But when it comes to consuming media that's designed to arouse, doesn't the eroticism entail the whole event? If you're a heterosexual person viewing heterosexual pornography, you're going to feel some level of attraction to performers of an opposite sex to your preferred one. That might be subconscious and restricted solely to the context, i.e. you might like to watch that performer have sex with someone of your preferred sex because the aesthetics are appealing, but you wouldn't watch them masturbate nor would you enjoy seeing them in a homosexual encounter.

Basically, I'd argue there's a bit more leeway than we might think, but maybe I'm slightly tainted by my own outlook.

 

[SimonDoom]

Just my two cents. I don't think one should write erotica with an excessive sense of caution, i.e., never wanting to piss off a reader. Write your story and see what happens. Many readers will accept it; some won't. I get complaints from readers all the time about things, including things I would never anticipate, and if I worried about it too much I'd never get stories done.

There are ways of offering your story that can at least minimize the risk of outraged readers, such as the use of tags, or foreshadowing, or setting up the incident through the description of the character, but one can only do so much.

 

[Turnedonbysharing]

I'm a straight man and I enjoy butt stuff where the man is receiving. I think I'd probably enjoy it more if is a woman using her finger but if the mfm threesome is hot (especially if the woman is in control and directing things) then I wouldn't stop reading if one of the men explores the other. Especially if it was part of him just fondling the genitals of the couple who are having sex - feeling where they meet. A female partner I've been with enjoyed mfm fantasies and enjoyed the two men interacting so I'm used to dirty talking tat scenario. As a previous poster said - the more niche the smaller the readership. It will definitely turn some off.

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

I’ve never understood the TLAs - is there a use manual somewhere?

Emily

Looked TLA. Up in urban dictionary

First definition: Titty Love Affection
Second: Three Letter Acronym

Please clarify.

 

[Turnedonbysharing]

In the context of your personal sex life, I understand having strict sexual preferences. But when it comes to consuming media that's designed to arouse, doesn't the eroticism entail the whole event? If you're a heterosexual person viewing heterosexual pornography, you're going to feel some level of attraction to performers of an opposite sex to your preferred one. That might be subconscious and restricted solely to the context, i.e. you might like to watch that performer have sex with someone of your preferred sex because the aesthetics are appealing, but you wouldn't watch them masturbate nor would you enjoy seeing them in a homosexual encounter.

Basically, I'd argue there's a bit more leeway than we might think, but maybe I'm slightly tainted by my own outlook.

I'd agree. Part of enjoying hetro pornography is seeing/hearing his enjoyment. It's not attraction per say but is it needed for a convincing scene that arouses.

 

[MyBareTorso]

My throw...I write CFNM, and my recurring heterosexual male MC is always (a) nude and (b) the subject of the female gaze. He also quite often has women getting their fingers up his butt, and he's also been pegged and reverse gang-banged a few times. I certainly don't have a huge readership, but they haven't seemed to have had too much trouble with this kind of stuff. I always tag, and say it's, um, coming in my intro notes...

 

[Devinter]

In the context of your personal sex life, I understand having strict sexual preferences. But when it comes to consuming media that's designed to arouse, doesn't the eroticism entail the whole event? If you're a heterosexual person viewing heterosexual pornography, you're going to feel some level of attraction to performers of an opposite sex to your preferred one. That might be subconscious and restricted solely to the context, i.e. you might like to watch that performer have sex with someone of your preferred sex because the aesthetics are appealing, but you wouldn't watch them masturbate nor would you enjoy seeing them in a homosexual encounter.

Basically, I'd argue there's a bit more leeway than we might think, but maybe I'm slightly tainted by my own outlook.

Interesting to hear this view, and seeing it's supported by some, but I don't have this experience at all. So I think it's highly individual. Applies to some, not to others. So it's definitely not some universal truth. Would be interesting to have some statistics on this sort of thing though! For science!

 

[alohadave]

Second: Three Letter Acronym

Comes from government agencies that tend to have TLAs. FBI, CIA, FCC, FAA, etc.

 

[AlinaX]

Attraction is a curious thing with multiple facets, and because for many people these facets correspond, we're not always aware of them as distinct.

Thus I might see a woman and be struck by her beauty, but it's only when she starts talking in a husky voice that it occurs to me that she's not just a beautiful woman [aesthetic attraction], she's also a beautiful woman, and fucking hot [sexual attraction]. But as I get to know her, I realise she's really a lovely person and I fall head-over-heels in love [romantic attraction].

In a homophobic culture, we conflate these. Finding someone aesthetically attractive implies inevitably sexual and romantic attraction. A man dare not admit, even to himself, a desire to suck cocks or even to kiss a woman's mouth that has just sucked his own cock.

Sex can be enjoyable for itself, without any attraction involved. It's social conditioning that makes us assign layers of meaning.

So many stories on here are essentially the fantasy of being blindfolded or trapped some other way that prevents us seeing who it is we're having sex with. Yes there are stories of love and stories of lust, but sometimes we just want to fuck without all that social baggage.

 

[SimonDoom]

 

[Jackie.Hikaru]

First definition: Titty Love Affection

OK this is driving me nuts. Does this refer to having affection for for titty love? Or does it refer to being doubly appreciative of titties. I'm on board for both but which is it???

 

[samhasstories]

OK this is driving me nuts. Does this refer to having affection for for titty love? Or does it refer to being doubly appreciative of titties. I'm on board for both but which is it???

It's a support group where people who love titties gather to give each other affection. I go on Tuesdays.