This has been something I struggle with; It is the basic feelings of guilt, feeling that my love of female domination is weird and perverted. It is why I have fought to overcome it, and deny these very powerful sexual feelings that arise when I think about being whipped, dominated, spanked, and other things I won't talk about. I know it is hard, if not impossible, for many people to accept- and I understand that, and hence I have tried to supress it. Above all, I want love and companionship with a woman and for her sake I am totally willing to let go of the things she would feel are perverted and twisted.
Femdom fans?
- Thread starter Naughty69M2M
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This has been something I struggle with; It is the basic feelings of guilt, feeling that my love of female domination is weird and perverted. It is why I have fought to overcome it, and deny these very powerful sexual feelings that arise when I think about being whipped, dominated, spanked, and other things I won't talk about. I know it is hard, if not impossible, for many people to accept- and I understand that, and hence I have tried to supress it. Above all, I want love and companionship with a woman and for her sake I am totally willing to let go of the things she would feel are perverted and twisted.
I am also a fan of femdom - as long as its not too severe. I would love to be in a female led relationship. Does it seem to anyone else that for a woman to be submissive to a man is more socially acceptable than a man to be submissive to a woman ?
gregor2001us
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You can
You can count me in. Since puberty, that has been my desire.
You can count me in. Since puberty, that has been my desire.
Absolutely. That is how our modern society has evolved, unfortunately.
It is even ingrained among certain people's religious beliefs- among the hard-core conservative Christians, many believe that it is a woman's God given role to submit to her husband. Plus, there is the social norm of manliness, of the male role to be the strong one, in a relationship and in the world, and there is a stigma attached to any man who is not.
For people like us, being in a female led relationship, particularly with kink/hard core BDSM involved, would sound kinky, fulfilling, exciting and fun, but it is unfortunate that our society does not endorse such things- it is seen as deviant.
Calvinskip
Virgin
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I truly enjoy being controled in all means possible and have been very lucky to have been done this way now for many years by my only love, my wife! Nothing compares to the enjoyment of pleasing my master.
box13
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Unless you're crawling around on all fours and answering "yes my queen" I don't know how many people would notice. Although I'm sort of the opinion that what woman say they want is a man who is occasionally submissive or at least neutral...but by and large, it's a big turn-off for them; it becomes a security and respect blocker that only worsens over time.
Femdom that's not too severe, I understand. Or some switching between female or male dominance that's more nurturing, I can understand, too. But yes, women who are sexually confident and empowered and have some fetish ideas of their own are truly wonderful to talk with.
HighPlainsDrifter
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Very interested in this. Most often I'm the dominant in our relationship but there are times I want her to take complete control of me. Please!
AmethystQueen
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Yes! I am a femDom fan because I am one. I am sometimes let down by the spruced up images of femDom I see around the internet. I prefer to see the servants servicing their Queen whoever she likes. That could be one-on-one or multiple at a time. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN AND LONG MAY SHE BE PLEASURED! 
Livingtitan
Loves Spam
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Femdom is awesome.
Its... eh honestly its a hit or miss. It can be amazing to click with a woman and have it go off without a hitch, but at least 90% of the time it just doesn't work. Nearly everyone I've met in person doesn't actually enjoy it and then an awkward tension forms, and the ones online expect too much or are completely fake accounts. Plus on top of that, you get threads where theres a million desperate men posting and all the females are in hiding because they know what happens when they poke their pretty little heads out.
Femdom is fun, but the chances of surreal, dominant pleasure are so low that I don't bother wasting my time on it anymore.
Femdom is fun, but the chances of surreal, dominant pleasure are so low that I don't bother wasting my time on it anymore.
switchersm
Cuck Cpl., hub caged
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And I am keyholded by my beloved wife.
How do you keep your husband chaste? I wear different cock cages permanent 24/7, at work, also at nudist beaches and in the sauna.
AmethystQueen
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Wow. I REALLY hope you find someone in real life to blow your mind. You sound kinda bitter about not finding that person yet. Sorry you had such bad experiences. There are many professional Domme's. Have you looked online for those?
I have had quite an enjoyable experience in person with a woman who blew my mind. Unfortunately, they weren't exactly the greatest of human beings. There was one other woman who indulged into my fantasies and it was wonderful, but thats only two woman out of the however many that I've talked to about it. It is... unfortunate, but alas nothing to worry about. Anyway, thank you for your words of encouragement
I love femdom. Huge part of why I left my semi-vanilla marriage- not enough kink! I had a FWB that let me do a lot. I found out how much I love teasing, restraining, edging, pegging, spanking, snowballing, watching, denying... not so much the extreme humiliation and pain. I love pushing buttons and directing, setting up a scene, creating that anticipation. Discovered that a man in panties is incredibly hot after I was the one who told him to wear them. But all that being said, I don't want to live that lifestyle 24/7. It's just a very sexy diversion!
SecretSubM88
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I recently discovered my submissive fantasies while reading stories here on Lit. . This means I have currently NO experience with femdom... but I am reading and learning more everyday. I hope to experiment with it very soon.
Love,
Love,
Last edited:
SovereignShe
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Raises hand.
Slickrick123
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This is something I'd like to explore a little further.
OlderMalesubInSearchofDom
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i'm very submissive, always have been and Adore Dominant Women. i find myself doing things for Woman who i don't even know, it's a life. Now all i need to do is find a Woman to own me. 
I'm also a big femdom, especially with a lesbian twist. Being a feminized pet servant and plaything for a Sapphic Sisterhood would be a dream come true. I was lucky enough to live out this fantasy for a few months with a lesbian domme and a bi-curious girlfriend. Having my gf taken from me by a superior woman and being made to like it was a thrill of a lifetime.
pensivepoet
Love dangerously
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Yeah, it rocks my boat.
Naughty69M2M
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That is fucking hot
stargazer214
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FemDom.... Would absolutely submit to one.
Wild_Honey_66
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Rambly thoughts
My guess is that many middle-of-the-road women would be willing to experiment if introduced to the idea gently. Rather than start in the bedroom, where women typically have a shit ton of esteem issues already, start somewhere else in your relationship. Help her to see the fun in it, and/or the benefit to her. Otherwise, she's going to hear you saying, 'I don't want to bear the burden of our family/relationship, I just want to wear your panties and lick your pussy all day long,' which is not going to sound nearly as appealing to her as it does to you.
Before you can ask her to move beyond her comfort zone in the bedroom, you're going to have to make sure that she feels safe and fulfilled outside of it. What are her love languages? How can you 'serve' her in those areas? Come to her with a proposition, an experiment to give her just a taste, reaffirming on a regular basis that your goal is to meet her needs, and that your pleasure is the happy by-product. Know your woman, and what pleases her. Be proactive, take the initiative in designing the experiment to be a win-win situation.
Does she hear love through Acts Of Service? Tell her, 'Darling, I would like to please you today by serving you.' What woman in her right mind is going to say no to that? Make a list of things she hates to do, and do them for her, because you love her. Ask her if she has any needs. Do those. There - you are putting her preferences above your own, and that is a form of submission. It may not be the kind you are after, but it is a good place to start. You have to get on her page before you can invite her over to yours.
After she learns to trust that you are willing to put her needs and desires first in the unglamorous areas of life, you can begin to move toward more sensual activities. I have read excellent things on the Fet&Sex boards from those who have purchased a massage table, for instance. I would suggest that you pick a key phrase that will become familiar and reassuring and pleasant to her, to build her anticipation of what is in store, and then tweak it to suit each new exploration. 'Darling, I would like to please you today by serving you... with my hands. What can I do for you with my hands that would give you joy?' Make it easy for her to ask by offering some suggestions, but be prepared for her to test you by having you clean the toilets. If things are going well, you can ask her, 'May I serve you by rubbing your feet/brushing your hair/putting lotion on your back?' Eventually you can move to, 'May I give you pleasure by licking your (insert body part here).'
Work on getting her to receive your service and look forward to it before you expect her to want to actively control you. During the transition over, be sexy, be playful. Does she like to watch you masturbate? Tell her, 'I can't decide whether I should use my left hand, or my right. What do you think?' Don't put too much pressure on her. If she doesn't want to say, offer her a coin to flip.
Titles: I think titles can be fun, though I much prefer they sound like terms of endearment. Experiment in and out of the bedroom to see what she responds well to. You may find clues in the movies she likes or the books she reads. Don't insist on calling her Mistress or My Queen if she would prefer something less obvious.
No brainers: browse Lit, Reddit, FetLife, Tumblr together to find what appeals to her. Cruise Amazon for toys. Take her to Tractor Supply and have fun checking out collars and leashes and riding crops! As with everything, start small and let her set the pace. Most of all, make it fun.
My guess is that many middle-of-the-road women would be willing to experiment if introduced to the idea gently. Rather than start in the bedroom, where women typically have a shit ton of esteem issues already, start somewhere else in your relationship. Help her to see the fun in it, and/or the benefit to her. Otherwise, she's going to hear you saying, 'I don't want to bear the burden of our family/relationship, I just want to wear your panties and lick your pussy all day long,' which is not going to sound nearly as appealing to her as it does to you.
Before you can ask her to move beyond her comfort zone in the bedroom, you're going to have to make sure that she feels safe and fulfilled outside of it. What are her love languages? How can you 'serve' her in those areas? Come to her with a proposition, an experiment to give her just a taste, reaffirming on a regular basis that your goal is to meet her needs, and that your pleasure is the happy by-product. Know your woman, and what pleases her. Be proactive, take the initiative in designing the experiment to be a win-win situation.
Does she hear love through Acts Of Service? Tell her, 'Darling, I would like to please you today by serving you.' What woman in her right mind is going to say no to that? Make a list of things she hates to do, and do them for her, because you love her. Ask her if she has any needs. Do those. There - you are putting her preferences above your own, and that is a form of submission. It may not be the kind you are after, but it is a good place to start. You have to get on her page before you can invite her over to yours.
After she learns to trust that you are willing to put her needs and desires first in the unglamorous areas of life, you can begin to move toward more sensual activities. I have read excellent things on the Fet&Sex boards from those who have purchased a massage table, for instance. I would suggest that you pick a key phrase that will become familiar and reassuring and pleasant to her, to build her anticipation of what is in store, and then tweak it to suit each new exploration. 'Darling, I would like to please you today by serving you... with my hands. What can I do for you with my hands that would give you joy?' Make it easy for her to ask by offering some suggestions, but be prepared for her to test you by having you clean the toilets. If things are going well, you can ask her, 'May I serve you by rubbing your feet/brushing your hair/putting lotion on your back?' Eventually you can move to, 'May I give you pleasure by licking your (insert body part here).'
Work on getting her to receive your service and look forward to it before you expect her to want to actively control you. During the transition over, be sexy, be playful. Does she like to watch you masturbate? Tell her, 'I can't decide whether I should use my left hand, or my right. What do you think?' Don't put too much pressure on her. If she doesn't want to say, offer her a coin to flip.
Titles: I think titles can be fun, though I much prefer they sound like terms of endearment. Experiment in and out of the bedroom to see what she responds well to. You may find clues in the movies she likes or the books she reads. Don't insist on calling her Mistress or My Queen if she would prefer something less obvious.
No brainers: browse Lit, Reddit, FetLife, Tumblr together to find what appeals to her. Cruise Amazon for toys. Take her to Tractor Supply and have fun checking out collars and leashes and riding crops! As with everything, start small and let her set the pace. Most of all, make it fun.
