Female Dominance...

[red_head_bitch]

I posted this in the How To... section and got re-directed here. I hope this hasn't already been brought up and I accidentally missed it, but here's my situation...

So for the first time I'm with a man who's into domination during sex. It's such a turn on to me, but I'm not sure how to go about being dominant towards him. I have relatively very little experience in dominating compared to being dominated, but I'd really like to try it out and I'm looking for some/any tips you guys have to offer! thanks!

 

[alwaysknow]

Try....

looking at the BDSM group for "Ask a Dom". The starter of the Question is away for a little bit but your question will be answered best there by very knowledgeable people. Saying all that I am sure they will travel over to your question now that you have posted it in the BDSM group.,

 

[Kiandra]

Ask what you would like done to yourself and reverse the actions and roles

 

[catalina_francisco]

Kiandra has it pretty much right, although that might not work if the one subbing is not tuned into the same things which ring your bells. It is a good way to approach it mentally thought as it manages to relax you a lot based on confidence borne from actual hands on knowledge from the other side of the whip. If you want to see some of the ways I handled my first experience of topping, check out The Joy Of Pain link in my signature. Have fun and remember you are the one in charge and all should go well.

Catalina

 

[Aeroil]

If you can think of something interesting, do it. Give it a shot, set the pace and all that.

Srsly, experimentation works best, as 'tis with many things.

 

[gregor2001us]

If it were me ( I am a male sub) I would want you to just do what you want. Be confident in your sexuality. Experiment with what interests you. Don't worry about whether I like it, if I can see you are enjoying yourself, then it turns me on.

But that is just me. I like to be frustrated. I like to be treated as a sex toy or sex slave. But everyone is different. so communication is the real key.

 

[FurryFury]

I posted this in the How To... section and got re-directed here. I hope this hasn't already been brought up and I accidentally missed it, but here's my situation...

So for the first time I'm with a man who's into domination during sex. It's such a turn on to me, but I'm not sure how to go about being dominant towards him. I have relatively very little experience in dominating compared to being dominated, but I'd really like to try it out and I'm looking for some/any tips you guys have to offer! thanks!

Personally I'm not so much for the just jump in and do any little thing you want vote.

I'd say just like I do to new male Doms to first communicate a great deal together with your sub.

Perhaps both of you should do a checklist of potential activities to locate not only intersecting interests but also soft and hard limits.

Further there are many activities you might want to research before trying.

Then ease into the things you are both into. Maybe go to a local demo on things you'd like to try but aren't sure about just HOW to do it in spite of your research and so on.

Most of all remember to have fun with it. That's what it's all about. There is no right or wrong but only what is right or wrong for you and your partner. Along the way remember to enjoy each step of the journey itself. It's not about getting from point A to point B. It's about the highlights, ups and downs, and may I say, sensations of the trip along the way.

Fury

 

[red_head_bitch]

Thank you all so much!! I actually just finished my first attempt in "taking the reins" about an hour ago. as far as I know he enjoyed it. I'm definitely looking forward to more of it hehe. thanks again!!

 

[SubNebGuy]

talk to him about it...make sure he did like it.

communication can make or break a relationship, believe me.

my wife and i communicate well, and we have the hottest sex...vanilla, me playing dom, her playing dom...everything!

 

[sister76]

Personally, I would refer to my fantasies. That tells all for me. If you have never had fantasies of that sort, you should search the web, I guess. If you really want to do it right, you will develop certain interests in this area ...

Obviously you can't be expected to master it so soon!

 

[Irony_Sinclair]

There is a wealth of good info for both of you on this site:

GOOD GIRL'S GUIDE TO FEMALE DOMINATION