Female Cyber Sex Virgin needs helps

[Noor]

I need some help learning to cyber. I have been approached by this man that wants to cyber and I want to as well with him. My problem is that I have no experience, I end up annoying him and he disappears, we never actually get close to anything mutually sexual. At first I figured oh well but he keeps approaching my various personas, I don't think he realizes we are one and the same but anyway next time I want to say yes and be able to at least get to some sex, I figure he will next approach me in about 3 weeks so I am looking for help.
The problems:
Pictures- he wants them, I don't want him to be able to recognize me in real life. I know who his is, he doesn't know who I am and I'd like to keep it that way. Any ideas?
I have a fair amount of sexual experience in the real world and on the phone, but I have never had sex with someone I don't know. I can get to know/feel comfortable with someone easily on the phone but how is that done with cyber sex?
How do I suggest where to go? where is best to go? I am sure I have more questions but I will wait to hear your replies
Thanks,
Noor

 

[lovetoread]

I asked this along time ago...heh, I still am not good at it though.
I prefer the phone over the computer.

http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=55401&highlight=cybersex+and+lovetoread

 

[SexyChele]

You give kind of sketchy information, but here goes.

As for pictures? Easy. Simply tell him you don't "do" pictures. You can give a description of yourself, yes. But tell him that you only send pics when/if you get to know the person very well - if at all. Just because you cyber with some one does not mean you "must" give them a picture of yourself. The majority of the "fun" is in imagining what the other person looks like, and in being for them what they most imagine.

Now, you are willing to cyber, yet somehow you "annoy" him? Huh? The only thing I can think of is that you are trying to pass yourself off as some one who has a lot of experience, leaving him to think you are going to get him off. Why not try the honest approach. (Okay, I know "honest" and cybersex is an oxymoron!) Be upfront and tell him that you've never cybered before but really want to. However, you need some one to help you along, hopefully get better over time. I've discovered that most men treat "cyber-virginity" as they do in reality - they jump for it.

Before beginning to cyber, it's helpful to know what he's into. Does he want to roleplay? Does he simply want you to type in what you would be doing if you were there? Does he want you to describe a certain act? How do you find this out, right? When he approaches you, simply ask him what his all time fantasy would be. Use your imagination and play into that fantasy.

For example, if he tells you his fantasy is to get the most mind boggling blow job ever, use your imagination. Where would you start? (In real life, that is) Describe how you would undo his pants, how you would take his cock in your hands, maybe teasing him a bit. Be as descriptive as possible. Do NOT, under any circumstance write something such as: "I'd suck your cock real hard." Boring!

Compare that to something like this: "Licking your cock from the base to the tip, one hand pulling on your balls, while the other plays with your ass. Bringing my lips up to the tip, using my tongue to tease the head, my lips sucking out the pre-cum slowly. Looking into your eyes, seeing your reaction as my lips slide over the head, sucking your cock between my lips, sliding over my tongue."

See? Also, don't overwrite. By that I mean, only type a sentence or phrase at a time. But try to type quickly. Remember, he's probably jacking off this, so he's going to want vivid description and fast.

Now, you might ask: when do I get off? Hmmm....sorry, but when I cyber, I usually only do it to get the guy off, not me. That's reserved only for a certain man. However, what I have found easiest, is for him to get you off - through writing and you masturbating - and then for you to get him off. Oh, and just a word of advice: if you want to get off at all, be sure you get to do so first. The majority of men out there (thankfully not all!) will cum and go - very quickly!

If you are interested in him for more than a one time cyber fuck, then you might want to start off with exchanging pleasantries first, just as you would in r/l. A lot of times, men (and women, we are just as guilty!) will cyber with some one and then never talk to them again. Be prepared for that.

The best thing? Have fun with it.

 

[P. B. Walker]

Oh, and just a word of advice: if you want to get off at all, be sure you get to do so first. The majority of men out there (thankfully not all!) will cum and go - very quickly!

LMAO... so true.

Bastards!

PBW

 

[Lust Engine]

LMAO... so true.

Bastards!

PBW

I agree! I think Chele nailed it down so well I'm breaking a sweat just reading her response.

 

[Gods_Favorite]

Licking your cock from the base to the tip, one hand pulling on your balls, while the other plays with your ass. Bringing my lips up to the tip, using my tongue to tease the head, my lips sucking out the pre-cum slowly. Looking into your eyes, seeing your reaction as my lips slide over the head, sucking your cock between my lips, sliding over my tongue."


^^^^^^^^^god chele, I wanna cyber with you lol

 

[Noor]

Thanks SexyChele! Your advice was very helpful.

"annoyed"? I was honest, he has some rules that he doesn't share. Knowing nothing about cyber sex when this started, I had no idea what he was on about, I have a better idea now. I feel much more prepared for the next approach if I choose to respond.

I guess I should practice, where would anyone suggest I go and how to get started?

Thanks,

Noor

 

[Rosamund]

.

 

[Chicklet]

personally, i've *never* had mutual cybersex - maybe that's why it's easy for me to write erotica.

 

[Apathy]

Cyber=suxxor. Just get a bunch of whatever u find stimulating and make urself cum. Or stick 2 the real world...

 

[whatsinanameuk]

How to ...

.. not only know what he wants/likes/fantasises about - what do you want out of the cyber - It is much more than masturbation - at it's best it is the coming together (in all senses) of 2 minds.

You need to feel comfortable and relaxed with the other person. It is a disadvantage not have body language, sights, sounds, smells - until, that is, the imagination takes over.

Good luck

 

[isshogai7]

excuse me if i say so,but you both have to meet each other 's requests.If he doesn't,as it seems,forget about him.There are so may people more considerate:i've done cyber before and never let down someone.:we have always played by our rules,including pleasing each other.And being a man it's not an excuse to let people down and just waiting to get off and run away.Maybe i'm stupid,but i've never done that,always helped the girl i was with.I love to make her come,using my imagination for our mutual satisfaction.And usually we come together.
If he doesn't respects you, tell him to eff off.Hell ,i like to make the other person happy like she does to me.Including being there no matter what time is needed for both of us.
And remeber tothat if it's no it's no,especially the pics:If he's an uncorrect person,he doesn't deserve your attention.
Sorry to everybody for my ranting.

 

[SexyChele]

You know, I have to agree with Chicklet. I've tried the mutual thing - now that is seriously funny. Both people stroking away like mad and no one typing! I've tried the "you cum first, then me" and discovered I really don't get off on it. Okay, there is one man out there (he knows who he is) that can send me to heaven and back with the words he writes. But I've also known him for a year and a half.

I actually do prefer to simply help a man (or woman, in rare cases) get off. I'm usually very selective, and I have normally had men who were anxious about "helping me". I always turn them down. I just don't get out of it what they do. But, I like to write out the scenes, describe what I would be doing, etc. And I think this has really helped me to discover that I like and can write erotica. After all, to me, cyber is nothing more than writing erotica for some one who is actively reading each word as I'm writing it.

But then, I don't get off on the erotica I write either.

Guess I just need that skin to skin contact, or that seductive voice over the phone to really "do" it for me!

 

[Rosamund]

.

 

[dr_mabeuse]

Curious: What makes a woman want to cyber with a particular guy and not some other. I mean, why would you be stuck on one guy rather than someone else? Do men really seem that different from each other online?
Do you look for someone who has special cyber abilities or sensitivities, say, an unusually large vocabulary or strong erotic imagination?


---dr.M.

 

[whatsinanameuk]

Maybe ...

.. because it's not flesh to flesh it is a meeting of minds - can you do that with anyone?

Still, what do I know I'm just a guy.

 

[whatsinanameuk]

Typing or Voice chat

I have to agree. He always went first and left me longing for more, and left me unsatisfied. Ok, well occasionally he would take care of me. Anyway I don't like to share with others and, well, I think he had 3 or 4 others to keep him occupied. Cyber can be great; the frequency though can be a problem or at least that is what I found.

Did you do it typing or voice - I've found often voice can be better for feeling together? (Also leaves hands free )

 

[sarahuk4]

Re: Typing or Voice chat

Did you do it typing or voice - I've found often voice can be better for feeling together? (Also leaves hands free )

Voice , Whats , can be one of the most erotic types of cybersex you can achieve , I still call voice , cybersex , as it is not bodies meeting ...

 

[peachykeen]

Curious: What makes a woman want to cyber with a particular guy and not some other. I mean, why would you be stuck on one guy rather than someone else? Do men really seem that different from each other online?
Do you look for someone who has special cyber abilities or sensitivities, say, an unusually large vocabulary or strong erotic imagination?


---dr.M.

Yes there really is a difference online, believe it or not. It's hard to describe. I have (had) a few very intense cyber partners, whose screen company I have enjoyed a great deal. For me, the difference I found was that there are loads of men online who jump right in with a battery of questions (How big are your tits? What are you wearing? How old are you? Will you send me photos? Can I call you?) It's all about what I can do for them, very selfish. I imagine in real life these men are probably not very considerate lovers either. However, I once in a while am fortunate enough to come across (no pun intended ) a fellow who flirts, enjoys some good conversation, asks the questions as and when it seems appropriate, lets things unfold, and 'works' with me to create a nice setting, a good scene, a nice sexy little fantasy tale. In a way it's rather like collaborating on an erotic story - in fact, I'd say exactly like that - one in which we are the 'active' participants and main characters. In the right moment, in the right frame of mind, I find it a lot of fun.

 

[Noor]

Voice? How do you do voice? I would prefer voice

 

[Tine]

Awkward

I don't know how you can do it. I can understand enjoying typing messages back and forth with a guy (I can't even begin to imagine what someone means by voice). But to then "do it" infornt of the computer - not exactly erotic things are they? - it doesn't grab me as something to get me going. But I admit I haven't tried (no that's not an invitation). Just curious that any woemn would fancy it (not guys - no disrespect - but you'll perfrom to any stimulation no matter how slight won't you!?)

 

[Noor]

Curious: What makes a woman want to cyber with a particular guy and not some other. I mean, why would you be stuck on one guy rather than someone else? Do men really seem that different from each other online?
Do you look for someone who has special cyber abilities or sensitivities, say, an unusually large vocabulary or strong erotic imagination?


---dr.M.

In my case, I know who the guy is. I find his logic and writing very interesting and I thought it would be fun when he proposed it. He responded to my writing & philosophy. I didn't really have any interest in cybering up to that point, I am a real life or phone person. Is he really different than other guys on line ? Yes, I can recognize his syntax, writing style, and whacko sense of logic even if he posts anonymously or as another persona. He does have a strong imagination and is very creative in other aspects of his life so I imagined that would transfer. He has a great voice, so I am very curious about how to do voice.

 

[SexyChele]

Curious: What makes a woman want to cyber with a particular guy and not some other. I mean, why would you be stuck on one guy rather than someone else? Do men really seem that different from each other online?
Do you look for someone who has special cyber abilities or sensitivities, say, an unusually large vocabulary or strong erotic imagination?


---dr.M.

Oh yes - and for all the reasons Peachy states and more. When guys come at me with nothing but questions, I feed them what they want to hear. Age? 18-20. Tits? 44D (But, of course, I'm only a size 8. Yeah, I look like freakin' Barbi!) Location? As far from them as possible. After I give them a drawn out description of who I am and all the delights I can give them and they are positively trembling because they need to cum - I log off. Those are the type that are only looking to get off and leave. They have no interest in another person. (Although once or twice I have actually gave a guy great cybe - then told my "real" name was Dave or Don or John or whatever. Totally freak when they think I'm another man. It's hilarious!)

On the other hand, the man that I will cyber with, in the truest sense of the word in that we both get off, is some one I've known for a year and a half. At first we never cybered. We would exchange PMs about the doofuses in the room and how desperate they were. We talked, got to know what each was like, talked about the "real" person behind the personas. More than once, when I felt that I was just being hit on too much, I would PM him and ask to "sit" in his lap and talk. He was always agreeable. And sometimes that is all we ever did - and he was there for me with that, and happy with it.

Now, sometimes we cum together. Sometimes (rarely, actually) I will write to get him off. A lot of times he simply wants to know that he got me off. And, he's happy with that. That's the difference, and that is what will make me drop everything and everyone to chat with him once he gets online. So, why waste my time with other fools, except to treat them as fools, when there is one out there who can truly rock my world?

 

[ridddder]

I agree with all of you, however I think to fully enjoy the experience you have to have the following:

1) You must be not ashamed of your sexuality, or the expression there of. Sex isn't embarassing it is a beautiful, emotional experience which is better when shared.

2) You must be creative, open minded, descriptive, erotic, and adventurous.

3) You must get to know the person a little prior to cyber passion, this isn't about getting off on an idea, or someone's voice, but a real person. Otherwise you could just type to a machine. The excitement is knowing you are sharing something naughty or itimate with someone.

4) Know what gets you off, and what you need to get you off. If you know your triggers it is easier to share them, than playing hunt and peck.

5)Sometimes the most thrilling thing is the newness of it, decide at first if you would want to do this again before you start. If you are interested in the idea of more, you can decide how much to expose the first time. How naughty, or explict you wish to describe yourself, and the sitsuations.

Personally I have done both(phone & cyber), and while cyber is fun, it is more of a big tease to me. I like the idea of sharing an interactive story with someone. However, it is too impersonal to me to take me over the edge.

I think it is how guys interpret sexual imagery, and thoughts we get more turned on visually, than say audibly or even mentally. Remember the most sexual organ is the mind, depending on how comfortable, and open you become. Cyber will become a growing, and or learning erotic experience.



-Rid

 

[Tine]

Long list of musts

Now come on - if you have to list dos and don't like that it's hardly sexy is it - more like a car manual or something. Sex should have it's own energy and impetus, that takes over between two people if things are right.

Sarah. your reply to Whatsaname (hope this question is OK in public) but have you tried both and do they both feel good to you. I just do staight sex with my husband and that's it. Literotica has opened my eyes!!!