Feeling a bit blue

[Lovepotion69]

Ok, I know I haven't been around in a while. Been busy looking for a job and doing heaps of substitute teaching.

So, I met this cute guy also substituting and we went on a few dates etc. Today he "dumped" me and I'm feeling a bit blue.

We've decided to just be friends and that's cool, but I still feel a bit down.

Anyone wanna cheer me up? Or just crack some stupid joke and tell me what you lot have been up to?

/LP

 

[Colleen Thomas]

*HUGS*

I'm not too good with jokes, the only one I routinely remember is

Q. What did one lesbian frog say to the other?
A. You know they're right we do taste like chicken.


It's so old and so corny perhaps it will get a smile. If not hopefully the hug ill help.

-Colly

 

[Guest]

LP, I don't have much to offer but to say I was quite blue last week, and time and friends helped most. You of course know you'll feel better eventually, but it means a lot to have people "see" you. So, here I am.

BTW, if you look you'll see Maths is married, Ice and Lin had their twins, Dest & Renza are expecting (R's pregnant), and Raph and Whisp got married. A good week for some, eh?

*hug*, Perdita

 

[Lovepotion69]

LP, I don't have much to offer but to say I was quite blue last week, and time and friends helped most. You of course know you'll feel better eventually, but it means a lot to have people "see" you. So, here I am.

BTW, if you look you'll see Maths is married, Ice and Lin had their twins, Dest & Renza are expecting (R's pregnant), and Raph and Whisp got married. A good week for some, eh?

*hug*, Perdita

OMG! All of that stuff has happened? Wow! I just saw that Ralph and Whisp got married. Wow, in that case I'll just have to congratulate Maths, Ice & Lin and Des & Renza too!

 

[McKenna]

.

 

[Just_John1]

Hey!

Sorry you're feeling down LP69.

A joke to cheer you up.

A Dr a lawyer and an engineer are traveling together and take a much needed restroom stop at a rest area on the highway. As the Dr. gets finshed and backs away from the urinal he turns and steps to the sink. He scrubs his hands all the way up his arms and with his hands held up, he turns the water off with his elbow.

The Lawyer finishes and turns to the sink to splash a little soap and water on his hands a quick rinse and he also leaves. The engineer just turns and walks out of the rest room.

As they were walking across the parking lot, the Dr turns to the Engineer and says; "You know, my dad always taught me that cleanliness is next to godliness, you really have to work at it and scrub vigorously."

The Lawyer replied "My dad taught me that you have to be clean but don't over do it."

The engineer said;
















"My dad taught me not to pee on my hands."

A little humor to brighten your day?

JJ1

 

[Guest]

 

[Liar]

Hey, maybe this'll put a grin on:

A little something I wrote for my ex gf for valentines. At least she thought it was funny.

Only for you and Svenskaflicka then. I might do a translation some day...

vill du ha en latin lover
ricky martin undercover
är det inte mig som du ska satsa på
will du ha en don juan
är jag kanske inte han
men jag lovar att jag älskar dig ändå


vill du ha en miljonär
som kan ge dig allt det där
som du pekar på och ännu mer än så
jag vill dränka dig i guld
man jag har en studieskuld
och jag lovar att jag älskar dig ändå


vill du ha en sex-atlet
en sån där som allting vet
om g-punkter och ställningar och så
jag är ingen sådan man
men jag gör så gott jag kan
och jag lovar att jag älskar dig andå

(det finns 7 verser till, men jag kom bara ihåg dessa)

 

[Svenskaflicka]

I've missed out on a lot...

I blame Hubby. It's all his fault, for waving that cute bod in front of me, making me forget about everything else.

 

[dreaming_lilith]

Hey, maybe this'll put a grin on:

A little something I wrote for my ex gf for valentines. At least she thought it was funny.

Only for you and Svenskaflicka then. I might do a translation some day...

vill du ha en latin lover
ricky martin undercover
är det inte mig som du ska satsa på
will du ha en don juan
är jag kanske inte han
men jag lovar att jag älskar dig ändå


vill du ha en miljonär
som kan ge dig allt det där
som du pekar på och ännu mer än så
jag vill dränka dig i guld
man jag har en studieskuld
och jag lovar att jag älskar dig ändå


vill du ha en sex-atlet
en sån där som allting vet
om g-punkter och ställningar och så
jag är ingen sådan man
men jag gör så gott jag kan
och jag lovar att jag älskar dig andå

(det finns 7 verser till, men jag kom bara ihåg dessa)

Aaww...it's cute.

 

[gauchecritic]

"dumped" me /LP

I'm not sure I understand. He dumped you? He dumped you? He dumped you?

Just consider yourself lucky then. He must be mental.

Gauche

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Påminner mig om en variant min kompis lärde mig av Mats Rådberg's gamla "Du kan alltid lita på pojkarna över 35":

"Du kan alltid lita på smurfarna över 65.
Räck dem gärna handen, så följer de dig hem..."

Det som var roligt med den sången var att min kompis alltid illustrerade sången med att böja sig ned och gå hand i hand med en osynlig, 2 dm hög figur...

 

[pop_54]

Re: Re: Feeling a bit blue

I'm not sure I understand. He dumped you? He dumped you? He dumped you?

Just consider yourself lucky then. He must be mental.

Gauche

I'm with the lad gauche LP darling, any bloke daft enough to dump a sweetie like you has got to be a couple sarnies short of a full picnic.

Blonde walks into a sex shop, "Any decent dildo's in stock?" She enquires.

"On the display over there love," The assistant replies.

"Ooo... can I have that red one with the knobbly bits on, how much is it?" She stammers excitedly.

"That's the Fire extinguisher dear," He chuckles.

 

[Black Tulip]

LP, I don't have much to offer but to say I was quite blue last week, and time and friends helped most. You of course know you'll feel better eventually, but it means a lot to have people "see" you. So, here I am.

BTW, if you look you'll see Maths is married, Ice and Lin had their twins, Dest & Renza are expecting (R's pregnant), and Raph and Whisp got married. A good week for some, eh?

*hug*, Perdita

All this happened?

Sigh, I must have worked too much. I missed almost all the fun.

LP,

Hope you got cheered a bit by all the well wishes. I'm lousy at jokes.
I'll stick to a hug and a pat on the shoulder.

 

[angela146]

You could write a story about the bozo who dumped you...

When I'm pissed at someone, a good story or fantasy can be very satisfying.

 

[minsue]

I'm in complete agreement with Gauche & Pops, which is always a safe bet.

Here's my contribution to the cheer.

How many message board posters does it take to change a light bulb?


1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed.

11 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.

9 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs.

3 to point out spelling/grammar errors n posts about changing light bulbs.

12 to flame the spell checkers.

4 to correct spelling/grammar flames.

16 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb".

4 to condemn those 16 as anal-retentive.

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp".

27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs.

14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's.

10 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy.

5 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ.

41 to ask what is a "FAQ".

6 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs".

***

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again.

This joke was brought to you by those wonderful poets and stolen from their thread:More "Medicine"

Hope it helps.

 

[Lovepotion69]

Awww

Thanks everyone for the jokes, pat on the back, hugs and everything. I'm feeling better today, but I'll probably stay away from the guy for a bit now. A break is probably good. We'll most likely bump into each other next week at school though, so we'll see how things are then.

And he certainly wasn't the one! We just didn't have the chemistry, but I thought there was a possibility for it to develop into something interesting. Was mainly feeling blue as it was the first guy since fall 2002 that has actually caught my eye.

Ah well, shit happens. There are plenty more of men out there for me. Maybe I should continue some of the stories I haven't touched in weeks...

 

[Dirt Man]

One good thing about being a writer is that while someone can hurt your feelings for a breath in time, you can eviserate them for all eternity in your own literary endevors.

As Always
I Am the
Dirt Man

 

[Squiggy]

Originally posted by Lovepotion69
Ok, I know I haven't been around in a while. Been busy looking for a job and doing heaps of substitute teaching.

So, I met this cute guy also substituting and we went on a few dates etc. Today he "dumped" me and I'm feeling a bit blue.

We've decided to just be friends and that's cool, but I still feel a bit down.

Anyone wanna cheer me up? Or just crack some stupid joke and tell me what you lot have been up to?

/LP

two blondes come across some tracks while hiking in the woods...
the first says "look how many tracks there are..these are wolf tracks for sure..they travel in big packs"
the 2nd says "no, look how well organized and spaced out they are these are definitely deer tracks..."
they're still arguing about what type of tracks they are when












a train comes up and runs them over....

hope that helped out a bit
Squiggy

 

[Squiggy]

why did the blonde stare at the orange juice carton???









Because it said "made from concentrate"

 

[Squiggy]

okay last one for now...
a brunnette, a redheaded, and a blond are together eating dinner with each of their boyfriends...the redheaded girl tells her boyfriend in a southern drawl "pass the sugar ....Sugar"
everybody oohs and ahhs at how romantic that sounded..
the brunette then tells her BF "pass the honey...Honey"
again everybody comments on how romantic that sounded
the blond feeling a little left out looks around the table and tells her boyfriend









" Hey pass the bacon, Pig"

 

[smutpen]

Sorry, Lovepotion, that always kinda sucks.

But judging from your poetry and your picture, I'd say you're better off without him -- the guy must be feeble-minded.

I googled joke and dumped to find you an appropriate one, but the on-topic ones were pretty lame. I did find this, though.


Way too much to drink

After a hard day at the office, three guys decide to go out for a cocktail to wind down. The bar becomes very crowded, a few drinks turns into many and soon everyone is tanked. All three lose track of each other and end up going home separately.

The next day at the office, the three gather by the watercooler to discuss the past evening's events. The first guy says, "I got so drunk last night that I went home and blew chunks." The second guy pipes in, "That's nothing. I got so drunk that I got in my car and drove it right into a telephone pole. Totaled it. I didn't get hurt but now I have no car." The third guy says, "Well, I got so drunk that when I got home, I cussed my girlfriend out and knocked over a candle which lit the apartment on fire. She dumped me, all my belongings are destroyed and the home insurance won't cover the damage."

The first guy motions the two to come closer and whispers, "I'm not sure you understand. Chunks is my dog."

 

[dreaming_lilith]

Påminner mig om en variant min kompis lärde mig av Mats Rådberg's gamla "Du kan alltid lita på pojkarna över 35":

"Du kan alltid lita på smurfarna över 65.
Räck dem gärna handen, så följer de dig hem..."

Det som var roligt med den sången var att min kompis alltid illustrerade sången med att böja sig ned och gå hand i hand med en osynlig, 2 dm hög figur...

never heard that song
but to me it would make sense to not trust any creature that is blue...

 

[Liar]

never heard that song
but to me it would make sense to not trust any creature that is blue...

Aw, come on. What's not to trust?

 

[SnoopDog]

This one's for you alone.... (oh well I've been doing it the whole evening so I thought it might help a little, here]

http://www.gifmaniacos.com/Snoopy/snoo3py2.gif

Snoopy