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[SimonDoom]

Hey, don't bring my mother into this .

.

Resistance is futile, EB.

 

[oggbashan]

Latest anon:

2☆

Good story, but what's the obsession with the damn smotherig?

Two stars seems unnecessarily harsh for a 'good story'.

 

[Inkhorn]

I've had guys ask me about what the biggest cock was that I've had. I never measured and all seemed to be about the same size. My ex husband might have been slightly smaller but he was also pretty short.

He annoyed me because he kept commenting that he thought his cock was too small. Rather a mood killer for me. So.. I put a tape measure by my bed and whipped it out one night. He never said that again!

*chuckling* Well played!

Pretty sure if I asked my wife to measure me, she’d laugh her head off. And frankly, I wouldn’t blame her. I have enough insecurities and self-doubts as it is without adding that sort of nonsense into the mix!

 

[Desiremakesmeweak]

Time for that old story...

So this English cricket player goes into the men's room with other players (modern updated version - including the wokemons and English women cricketers as well) and he goes to take a piss next to this West Indian.

He can't help but see the guy has a tattooed dick.

"What is that -wen, wen, wendy? Cute. Your girlfriend's name is tattooed on your dick."

"No man. That sez 'welcome to Jamaica have a nice day.'"

 

[ElectricBlue]

MBTI, for instance - I test as an extreme "I", which is pretty accurate as a generalisation. But there are some classic "E" things that I can do very well, if I have time to prepare and space afterwards to decompress. Treating MBTI as a tool for classifying/predicting people's capabilities overlooks the capability for flexibility

Yes - introverts can live in an extrovert's world and excel at it, provided as you say, they are on point and can escape afterwards. Extroverts die in a ditch if someone turns their energy off, and are helpless until someone else comes into the room.

 

[MelissaBaby]

I've had guys ask me about what the biggest cock was that I've had. I never measured and all seemed to be about the same size. My ex husband might have been slightly smaller but he was also pretty short.

He annoyed me because he kept commenting that he thought his cock was too small. Rather a mood killer for me. So.. I put a tape measure by my bed and whipped it out one night. He never said that again!

I'm skeptical of any man who says he never measured. I think more likely, they say they never measured because they don't want to you to try to verify their claim.

 

[Inkhorn]

I'm skeptical of any man who says he never measured. I think more likely, they say they never measured because they don't want to you to try to verify their claim.

*Chuckling* Could very well be! In my case? I just assume I'm average. No lover I've ever had seemed disappointed or pitying, nor did anyone ever retreat screaming at me to get that monster away from them.

 

[oggbashan]

At my age I'm just satisfied that it still works.

 

[Inkhorn]

At my age I'm just satisfied that it still works.

Hear! Hear!

 

[BelleCanzuto]

*Chuckling* Could very well be! In my case? I just assume I'm average. No lover I've ever had seemed disappointed or pitying, nor did anyone ever retreat screaming at me to get that monster away from them.

There's a website called PostSecret, it was started years ago as an "art project". Anyway, people write secrets on postcards and mail them to the guy who runs it, and he posts selections of them, anonymously, of course, on the website every Sunday. He also reposts "classic" ones from a while back.

Anyway, under the "classic secrets" section a few weeks ago was this: "I'm glad you were so good with your fingers and mouth, because you have the smallest penis I've ever seen."

Just sayin', there's than one way to stave off disappointment...

 

[naughtyrusguy]

By the size I meant that the huge penises are not impossible as the other users think.
For example, when I was a teenager I liked using dating sites and almost every date led to an one-night stand. Wonderful times there were! And I heard from many girls how small their boyfriends were and they had to tell them they were huge. Lol!
In short words, it's bad to blame the writers for depicting 10-13 inches, because it's impossible. On the opposite. It's not often but it's possible. Who doesn't believe there are many homemade movies in the Net. Amateur ones.

By the way, it's so bad when the authors start some long story and stop it after the first or second chapter

 

[TxRad]

An old man goes into Mable's whorehouse and asks for a girl.

Mable looks the old man over and says, "Whip that thang out and lets see what we're working with."

He whips all one inch of dick out.

Mable's eyes get wide and all the girls giggle.

"Who the hell do you think you're going to satisfy with that little thing?" Mable asks.

The old man takes a beep breath and lets it out slowly. A moment later, he looks Mable dead in the eye and says, "Me!"

 

[naughtyrusguy]

Which story or stories are you referring to? I see that you have one story, but I don't see any feedback on it. I did try to read the first page, but couldn't bring myself to read more. Then story seemed to have potential but it just didn't do it for me because of the way it was written. That could be a matter of English not being your native language though.

I didn't say about my stories, but the stories the other authors wrote.
I wrote under the other nicknames when I couldn't remember my login/password.
Some stories didn't met the rules of Literotica and they were banned of course but I liked those stories and I didn't try to edit them for this reason.
For example, you can find "A good neighbour" and the readers liked it.

 

[Inkhorn]

There's a website called PostSecret, it was started years ago as an "art project". Anyway, people write secrets on postcards and mail them to the guy who runs it, and he posts selections of them, anonymously, of course, on the website every Sunday. He also reposts "classic" ones from a while back.

Anyway, under the "classic secrets" section a few weeks ago was this: "I'm glad you were so good with your fingers and mouth, because you have the smallest penis I've ever seen."

Just sayin', there's than one way to stave off disappointment...

*High-Fives*

 

[SimonDoom]

I'm skeptical of any man who says he never measured. I think more likely, they say they never measured because they don't want to you to try to verify their claim.

Never is a long time, and I have a hard time believing it as well. I'm way too much of a data geek not to want to satisfy my curiosity about that.

When I read the OP's comment about 9 inches not being that unusual, I wondered if our chain was being yanked. That's very big. I'm not sure I've ever seen one that big in a locker room. Not that I had a tape measure at the time, mind you, but I think I would have been able to tell just by a quick glance.

 

[SimonDoom]

2☆

Good story, but what's the obsession with the damn smotherig?

Two stars seems unnecessarily harsh for a 'good story'.

It does, but that unfortunately is not an uncommon sort of remark.

I'm with you. There are so many technically, mechanically horribly written stories on this Site that I cannot understand or imagine giving a score under a 3 to a story that is technically competent but in which the author has made a creative (or ethical) choice I don't like. But many commenters believe they're perfectly justified in dinging the author significantly for creative choices they disagree with.

 

[Hypoxia]

What was the OP? Doesn't matter now. So there's this:

Guys, spread out a hand. Either hand, probably, unless one is distinctly different. Now measure the distance from li'l-finger-tip to thumb-tip. That's supposedly your cock length. And it's not so messy to measure. Are you proud?

 

[ElectricBlue]

What was the OP? Doesn't matter now. So there's this:

Guys, spread out a hand. Either hand, probably, unless one is distinctly different. Now measure the distance from li'l-finger-tip to thumb-tip. That's supposedly your cock length. And it's not so messy to measure. Are you proud?

Forefinger tip to thumb tip, actually. And in my hands-on sample size of one, it's accurate .

 

[Bramblethorn]

Anyway, under the "classic secrets" section a few weeks ago was this: "I'm glad you were so good with your fingers and mouth, because you have the smallest penis I've ever seen."

Just sayin', there's than one way to stave off disappointment...

There are plenty of people with no dicks at all who manage to give ample satisfaction...

Guys, spread out a hand. Either hand, probably, unless one is distinctly different. Now measure the distance from li'l-finger-tip to thumb-tip. That's supposedly your cock length. And it's not so messy to measure. Are you proud?

My left hand spans about an inch further than my right. It's not any bigger, but my left thumb has about 45° more movement, so it can point out almost directly opposite to the pinky.

I don't know what that says about me in bed.

 

[Jada59]

I'm skeptical of any man who says he never measured. I think more likely, they say they never measured because they don't want to you to try to verify their claim.

That could be.

 

[oggbashan]

I have just deleted comments from the same anon on two of my recent stories. He left them to justify a 1 vote because he didn't like the story or category.

He has left similar comments in the last week on other stories, If he doesn't like what I write, why read, vote 1 and leave a rude comment?

PS. Is it a coincidence that anon leaves those votes and comments when my story is close to 4.5? My stories that are rated 3.something are ignored.