Faking orgasms?

[G00dg1rL]

I was perusing FB and someone had posted that she regularly fakes her orgásms. Then quite a few other women commented and said they also fake. I don’t understand it. If you keep faking how will he ever learn to please you properly?



But here’s the real question: Men, why can’t you tell whether your partner has orgasmed or not? Or if you CAN tell, how?

 

[spank_me_please]

Kind of a weird topic to be discussing on Facebook of all places

Now, I'm not sure if my wife has faked orgasms since obviously the point is to not tell me, but she does tell me when she hasn't cum yet, so I trust her when she says she has. There are some physical signs like flushed cheeks/neck that I imagine would be hard to fake.

 

[staylate]

Kind of a weird topic to be discussing on Facebook of all places

Now, I'm not sure if my wife has faked orgasms since obviously the point is to not tell me, but she does tell me when she hasn't cum yet, so I trust her when she says she has. There are some physical signs like flushed cheeks/neck that I imagine would be hard to fake.

I agree. There are times when my wife doesn't cum, despite my best efforts. Sometimes it just doesn't happen. She doesn't fake it because there's no need. I want her to cum, but my ego doesn't get bruised or anything. I guess I don't know if other women have faked it with me, but I'm assuming since they all had orgasms sometimes, and not others, that they weren't faking the ones they had. Either way, I'd want my partner to tell me if they weren't be satisfied, especially if there were things I could do differently.

 

[Sgts19]

My wife might have faked it a few times but usually tells me it's not going to happen. Lucky for me she always gets me off one way or another even though she might not be into it that day

 

[G00dg1rL]

Facebook is not a wholesome place.

There are also “private” groups and some folks use burner accounts. This person posted anonymously, but many don’t.
It’s good that your wife feels comfortable enough to be honest with you. I’m also honest with my partner and if I didn’t finish, he gets back to work.

 

[spank_me_please]

Facebook is not a wholesome place.

There are also “private” groups and some folks use burner accounts. This person posted anonymously, but many don’t.
It’s good that your wife feels comfortable enough to be honest with you. I’m also honest with my partner and if I didn’t finish, he gets back to work.

Yep, if she doesn't finish and is in the mood to finish that's my cue to get down there and finish her off with my tongue!

 

[verseandworse2]

I was perusing FB and someone had posted that she regularly fakes her orgásms. Then quite a few other women commented and said they also fake. I don’t understand it. If you keep faking how will he ever learn to please you properly?



But here’s the real question: Men, why can’t you tell whether your partner has orgasmed or not? Or if you CAN tell, how?

While eating pussy, we can definitely tell whether our partner has had an orgasm or not. The tongue feels the spasms, the twitches, as they occur. Some ladies push your face away just before orgasm, as they want to experience it without the partner's tongue interfering. Then too we know she is about to have an orgasm. While having intercourse, it is practically impossible for a man to tell. We have to rely on what the partner says - yes, she can fake it. Or have I been missing something?
Conversely, can a woman tell when her man orgasms, especially if - as in most cases nowadays - he is wearing a condom? Of course she soon finds out as he wilts and withdraws, but can she tell when he actually comes?

 

[G00dg1rL]

While eating pussy, we can definitely tell whether our partner has had an orgasm or not. The tongue feels the spasms, the twitches, as they occur. Some ladies push your face away just before orgasm, as they want to experience it without the partner's tongue interfering. Then too we know she is about to have an orgasm. While having intercourse, it is practically impossible for a man to tell. We have to rely on what the partner says - yes, she can fake it. Or have I been missing something?
Conversely, can a woman tell when her man orgasms, especially if - as in most cases nowadays - he is wearing a condom? Of course she soon finds out as he wilts and withdraws, but can she tell when he actually comes?

Very interesting.

When he’s licking me, I can feel juices release and I know he notices when it happens cause he usually says “mmmmm” or something like that. He assumed that was an orgasm but it wasn’t, it’s just juices.

And I’m confused by that because I know I move differently when I’m actually having an orgasm. I had to explain to him that those juices just mean he’s doing a great job but I wasn’t “there” yet. I’ll have to ask him tonight, if he actually feels the spasms on his tongue.

So you can’t feel the vagina pulsating when you’re inside?

I can tell when my partner orgásms. The díck pulsates and jumps LOL, and his breathing changes. He’s also pretty vocal. But I’ve been with the same person for 18 years, so that’s really all I have to go on.

 

[spank_me_please]

Can't speak for others but I haven't experienced this spasming in my tongue. I don't think the clot buzzes that much for my tongue to pick up any vibrations?

 

[gtnlynn]

My wife has always been quite vocal and has several involuntary movements when she orgasms. It lasts for a while, and I think I would know if she were faking. She actually tried one time, but she burst out laughing instead. She says she has faked it with other men just to make them stop.

 

[Britva415]

Men, why can’t you tell whether your partner has orgasmed or not?

'Cause they keep faking it!

No, just kidding. I can tell.

if you CAN tell, how?

Besides what others have said about being able to feel pulsations: I can only say something that's going to sound woo-woo.
"Energy."

It's like a sixth sense, but it's real, not made-up.

Long before the orgasm hits (or doesn't) and you feel the spasms (or hear her fake it), if you can't even tell she's getting there, you probably aren't going to be able to tell she didn't get there.

There's a sense of their energy which you get from having connection and empathy with another living being. You have to be sensitive. It can travel through the skin-to-skin connection, it can travel through a heart-to-heart connection, it can travel through a non-verbal mental connection.

There's a completely different sense of energy which happens when the two of you aren't connected, when she's putting on an act and masking what's really going on inside her, hiding what she's really feeling.

So, I can tell. If this sounds like super-power bullshit to someone, I'm sorry if you don't have it, or even believe in it, yourself. But this skill, this sense gives me something even better than knowing when someone's faking it: It means I don't give them a reason to feel like they have to fake it in the first place.

It's not foolproof, it isn't a mind-meld, I can't tell what WILL work if what I'm doing isn't working for them. So ideally we use words. I'm not afraid to ask, to suggest, to check in. If they tell me, I listen. If they can't tell me, it's a lot harder - but I can still do something different and see how that works.

There are people who will just automatically start putting on an act. It's how they're conditioned. I show them and maybe tell them they don't have to do that with me. If they can't stop, we're not compatible.

There are people who can't be verbal during sex or about sex. Again, it's how they're conditioned. Having non-verbal skills makes sex with them work better.

If she's faking it, it's because she doesn't feel your connection to her. You're just down there working on her till something happens. She's not a toolbench. You can't put your mind inside a wrench, but you can put your mind inside your lover. If she's faking it, it's because you're handling her like a wrench instead of like a being.

Just pay attention. Just be sensitive. Just put yourself in her shoes, put your mind under her skin, let your nerves touch her nerves, sense what's going on with her energy. You'll know if she's faking it, you'll know if she's feeling it.

 

[verseandworse2]

Very interesting.

When he’s licking me, I can feel juices release and I know he notices when it happens cause he usually says “mmmmm” or something like that. He assumed that was an orgasm but it wasn’t, it’s just juices.

And I’m confused by that because I know I move differently when I’m actually having an orgasm. I had to explain to him that those juices just mean he’s doing a great job but I wasn’t “there” yet. I’ll have to ask him tonight, if he actually feels the spasms on his tongue.

So you can’t feel the vagina pulsating when you’re inside?

I can tell when my partner orgásms. The díck pulsates and jumps LOL, and his breathing changes. He’s also pretty vocal. But I’ve been with the same person for 18 years, so that’s really all I have to go on.

A man has to be very inexperienced to believe that vaginal lubrication, however copious it may be, constitutes an orgasm. Porn stories often claim that women start gushing as they orgasm, but my experience is that this is simply not the case. Lubrication remains the same as before. It is the spasms that tell the story, and only if the tongue is inside the vagina at that point.
Sorry, while having proper sex, I have never been to tell if the vagina of my partner was 'pulsating' or not. Besides, women are usually not as vocal as men at the moment of orgasm - in fact, if they go beyond short 'Ahs' and long 'Aaaahhhs', (reminds me of some sort of Morse code ) and start verbalising, I begin to suspect they are faking. None of my partners have ever yelled, "I'm COMING!" Of course, my experience of sexual variety has been very, very limited, so it may be I don't know enough.

 

[G00dg1rL]

My wife has always been quite vocal and has several involuntary movements when she orgasms. It lasts for a while, and I think I would know if she were faking. She actually tried one time, but she burst out laughing instead. She says she has faked it with other men just

A man has to be very inexperienced to believe that vaginal lubrication, however copious it may be, constitutes an orgasm. Porn stories often claim that women start gushing as they orgasm, but my experience is that this is simply not the case. Lubrication remains the same as before. It is the spasms that tell the story, and only if the tongue is inside the vagina at that point.
Sorry, while having proper sex, I have never been to tell if the vagina of my partner was 'pulsating' or not. Besides, women are usually not as vocal as men at the moment of orgasm - in fact, if they go beyond short 'Ahs' and long 'Aaaahhhs', (reminds me of some sort of Morse code ) and start verbalising, I begin to suspect they are faking. None of my partners have ever yelled, "I'm COMING!" Of course, my experience of sexual variety has been very, very limited, so it may be I don't know enough.

Idk, He’s 13 years older and way more experienced than me(Although it doesn’t take much to be more experienced than me ). I suspect he’s more “experienced” than he’s let on, but that’s another story. I think it’s just never come up or either someone misled him. We’ve been together a long time and It’s only recently come up because he made a comment that he could taste every orgasm but his count was like 7 but in reality it was 3. That’s what sparked the conversation.



He says it tastes different from my “regular” juices. I don’t squirt, so I’m sure that’s not it. Or maybe? Now that I’ve typed this out, I’m not sure. It doesn’t feel like it’s coming from the vagina; it feels like it’s coming from the urethra. But it doesn’t necessarily coincide with an orgasm.



And it doesn’t feel the same as regular wetness. I can be super wet and not feel anything come out, but when he’s licking me I definitely feel it come out; it’s very obvious.

Like - the way it looks when you overfill a cup, the way the liquid just kinda sits right at the edge until the last drop makes the cup spill over- that’s what it feels like. Idk how else to explain it I hope that makes some kind of sense.



The Morse code is hilarious . I’m also quite quiet, to the point that he once actually asked me to be more vocal. A few occasions he asked me to tell him when it was about to happen, and I will, but it’s never like what they do in porn- no loud announcement. But of course those folks are playing it up for the audience.

 

[bethany_s]

While eating pussy, we can definitely tell whether our partner has had an orgasm or not. The tongue feels the spasms, the twitches, as they occur. Some ladies push your face away just before orgasm, as they want to experience it without the partner's tongue interfering. Then too we know she is about to have an orgasm. While having intercourse, it is practically impossible for a man to tell. We have to rely on what the partner says - yes, she can fake it. Or have I been missing something?
Conversely, can a woman tell when her man orgasms, especially if - as in most cases nowadays - he is wearing a condom? Of course she soon finds out as he wilts and withdraws, but can she tell when he actually comes?

I have only faked one time in my life, and that was during a really bad hookup in college. He kept asking me annoying questions and kept asking when I was going to get there, like him annoyingly pumping me was going to get me there. So I faked it so I could say I got there and he would get off of me lol. Such a bad experience. Anyway lol.

The first part of your question about not feeling a womans orgasm during sex. When I have an orgasm my muscles tense up around him down there, I can feel that. And he says he can usually feel it. Maybe more if he is not moving. Maybe you are moving still and harder to notice it.

And its been a while since I used condoms, but even without a condom I can feel him get more tense and rigid right before his orgasm and kind of feel his body language even if he doesn't say its happening. And his member jumps more, but thats harder to feel if he is still moving, but usually he isn't.

 

[G00dg1rL]

'Cause they keep faking it!

No, just kidding. I can tell.


Besides what others have said about being able to feel pulsations: I can only say something that's going to sound woo-woo.
"Energy."

It's like a sixth sense, but it's real, not made-up.

Long before the orgasm hits (or doesn't) and you feel the spasms (or hear her fake it), if you can't even tell she's getting there, you probably aren't going to be able to tell she didn't get there.

There's a sense of their energy which you get from having connection and empathy with another living being. You have to be sensitive. It can travel through the skin-to-skin connection, it can travel through a heart-to-heart connection, it can travel through a non-verbal mental connection.

There's a completely different sense of energy which happens when the two of you aren't connected, when she's putting on an act and masking what's really going on inside her, hiding what she's really feeling.

So, I can tell. If this sounds like super-power bullshit to someone, I'm sorry if you don't have it, or even believe in it, yourself. But this skill, this sense gives me something even better than knowing when someone's faking it: It means I don't give them a reason to feel like they have to fake it in the first place.

It's not foolproof, it isn't a mind-meld, I can't tell what WILL work if what I'm doing isn't working for them. So ideally we use words. I'm not afraid to ask, to suggest, to check in. If they tell me, I listen. If they can't tell me, it's a lot harder - but I can still do something different and see how that works.

There are people who will just automatically start putting on an act. It's how they're conditioned. I show them and maybe tell them they don't have to do that with me. If they can't stop, we're not compatible.

There are people who can't be verbal during sex or about sex. Again, it's how they're conditioned. Having non-verbal skills makes sex with them work better.

If she's faking it, it's because she doesn't feel your connection to her. You're just down there working on her till something happens. She's not a toolbench. You can't put your mind inside a wrench, but you can put your mind inside your lover. If she's faking it, it's because you're handling her like a wrench instead of like a being.

Just pay attention. Just be sensitive. Just put yourself in her shoes, put your mind under her skin, let your nerves touch her nerves, sense what's going on with her energy. You'll know if she's faking it, you'll know if she's feeling it.

It doesn’t sound “woo-woo” at all. I totally get it. I absolutely believe the energy between partners makes a big difference in everything. Thank you for your response.

 

[Britva415]

It doesn’t sound “woo-woo” at all. I totally get it.

I'm not surprised I was sort of anticipating how some guys might take it.

You know - the ones who get faked on. Those guys.

 

[Noor]

I don’t get the point of faking orgasms.

 

[Ssbbw4u1974]

I faked every single orgasm until I was with the man I married. The first night him and I were together, the neighbor heard me screaming in "pleasure" through the open window, and yelled back that I was faking, lol...I was so embarrassed!!!

But he eventually became the only person to give me orgasms in my entire sex life..
(My late husband, now)..

 

[verseandworse2]

Idk, He’s 13 years older and way more experienced than me(Although it doesn’t take much to be more experienced than me ). I suspect he’s more “experienced” than he’s let on, but that’s another story. I think it’s just never come up or either someone misled him. We’ve been together a long time and It’s only recently come up because he made a comment that he could taste every orgasm but his count was like 7 but in reality it was 3. That’s what sparked the conversation.



He says it tastes different from my “regular” juices. I don’t squirt, so I’m sure that’s not it. Or maybe? Now that I’ve typed this out, I’m not sure. It doesn’t feel like it’s coming from the vagina; it feels like it’s coming from the urethra. But it doesn’t necessarily coincide with an orgasm.



And it doesn’t feel the same as regular wetness. I can be super wet and not feel anything come out, but when he’s licking me I definitely feel it come out; it’s very obvious.

Like - the way it looks when you overfill a cup, the way the liquid just kinda sits right at the edge until the last drop makes the cup spill over- that’s what it feels like. Idk how else to explain it I hope that makes some kind of sense.



The Morse code is hilarious . I’m also quite quiet, to the point that he once actually asked me to be more vocal. A few occasions he asked me to tell him when it was about to happen, and I will, but it’s never like what they do in porn- no loud announcement. But of course those folks are playing it up for the audience.

Very informative, thanks . From now on, I'll watch out for the change in taste, try to be more sensitive to it.

 

[verseandworse2]

I have only faked one time in my life, and that was during a really bad hookup in college. He kept asking me annoying questions and kept asking when I was going to get there, like him annoyingly pumping me was going to get me there. So I faked it so I could say I got there and he would get off of me lol. Such a bad experience. Anyway lol.

The first part of your question about not feeling a womans orgasm during sex. When I have an orgasm my muscles tense up around him down there, I can feel that. And he says he can usually feel it. Maybe more if he is not moving. Maybe you are moving still and harder to notice it.

And its been a while since I used condoms, but even without a condom I can feel him get more tense and rigid right before his orgasm and kind of feel his body language even if he doesn't say its happening. And his member jumps more, but thats harder to feel if he is still moving, but usually he isn't.

Interesting, thanks! Yes, I notice the muscle tensing while eating out pussy too. I have never, alas, been able to last long enough to give any of my partners an orgasm while fucking. I really envy porn stars , cannot imagine how they do it.
I swear by that parody of a popular prayer - "I lay my body down to sleep/I pray to God my soul to keep/And if I die before I wake/I pray to God my soul to take."
The parody goes: "I lay my body down to mate/ I pray I don't ejaculate/ Too soon, but darling if I do/ I pray my tongue will see you through."

 

[UtilityCurve]

I was perusing FB and someone had posted that she regularly fakes her orgásms. Then quite a few other women commented and said they also fake. I don’t understand it. If you keep faking how will he ever learn to please you properly?



But here’s the real question: Men, why can’t you tell whether your partner has orgasmed or not? Or if you CAN tell, how?

EXACTLY what I told a GF (that I married). Faking cheated her, duh, but it also cheated me, because as her lover, I am absolutely entitled to be expected, required to I've her the pleasure she deserves.

And no, she was as good an actress as you could imagine. Either that or every girl I've ever fucked faked it too. (God, that thought is SO dark.)

You think you're "protecting" us. You're not. If we really care about you (that is to say "if you let the right one [literally] in") we can take it, because guess what? We'd really give our lives for you, no hesitation.

Now, doesn't that add some perspective to the matter?

 

[G00dg1rL]

I faked every single orgasm until I was with the man I married. The first night him and I were together, the neighbor heard me screaming in "pleasure" through the open window, and yelled back that I was faking, lol...I was so embarrassed!!!

But he eventually became the only person to give me orgasms in my entire sex life..
(My late husband, now)..

But what made you decide to fake instead of just telling them you weren’t there yet? I’ve seen a few different reasons, but what was it for you?

They damn sure keep going until they get theirs.

Did/do you still find it enjoyable even if you don’t get to orgasm?

That neighbor was definitely jealous

 

[Ssbbw4u1974]

But what made you decide to fake instead of just telling them you weren’t there yet? I’ve seen a few different reasons, but what was it for you?

They damn sure keep going until they get theirs.

Did/do you still find it enjoyable even if you don’t get to orgasm?

I was very promiscuous prior to getting married... And only really had drunk sex with strangers, so I was just a slut, if we're being real... It just never mattered if I got mine...
I'm a pleaser, so I really cared only that he got his..

(I pleasured myself through masturbation, and that was fine...)

 

[Older_Pervert]

I was perusing FB and someone had posted that she regularly fakes her orgásms. Then quite a few other women commented and said they also fake. I don’t understand it. If you keep faking how will he ever learn to please you properly?



But here’s the real question: Men, why can’t you tell whether your partner has orgasmed or not? Or if you CAN tell, how?

My girl usually has multiple orgasms when we have sex. Her face is the big giveaway - certain blankness, a vacancy in her expression as she starts to climax. She’d have to be a brilliant actress to fake that. Oh and she frequently squirts, which is pretty hard to fake!

 

[forgotmyantidepressants]

If I'm not in any good head space when we start, it's not happening, and I admit I've faked it because I feel guilty.

I also can't orgasm through vaginal sex alone. I faked vaginal orgasms for the longest time because I thought there was something wrong with me. There isn't. I just need clitoral stimulation.