Evil Eves Delights
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Witch Eve
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Is that why he is always scratching his butt? I bet he lost his sense of direction...and obviously his sense of smell as well....ran57gr said:At least at age 3 he could locate them... nowadays he has forgotten even where to start looking for them
Yes please turn the jets on............ ooooooo that feels so good
Lets start out the jets on gentle....we can always put them on high,,,and what about the bubbles....they feel really good...of course...lets invite Lance over...after all..we can't depend on the no good Snakey for anything!!
Galene
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Witch Eve said:Is that why he is always scratching his butt? I bet he lost his sense of direction...and obviously his sense of smell as well....
Lets start out the jets on gentle....we can always put them on high,,,and what about the bubbles....they feel really good...of course...lets invite Lance over...after all..we can't depend on the no good Snakey for anything!!
All that scratching.... maybe he's totally confused and thinks he's picking his nose...??
Ok, I'm going to look for Lance... but I warn you, he's shy and very serious
... I might have to tie him up and carry him, kickin' and screamin' 
Lance Hardrock
Your Cunning Linguist
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ran57gr said:All that scratching.... maybe he's totally confused and thinks he's picking his nose...??
Ok, I'm going to look for Lance... but I warn you, he's shy and very serious
There you are Rania.
Honey, if you tied me up, I wouldn't be kicking or screaming.
Lance Hardrock
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ran57gr said:Yeah, but I'd be kickin' my heels and screamin' at the top of my voice... I GOT HIM, EVE!!!
and would you have your way with me?
*he asks hopefully*
Witch Eve
Literotica Guru
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Description of Snakey
I will get a rope....Are you good with knots? I found this...it describes Snakey perfectly!! Along with 99.9% of the rest of the make population!!
1. WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX?
(because they are plugged into a genius)
2. WHY DON'T WOMEN BLINK DURING SEX?
(they don't have enough time)
3. WHY DOES IT TAKE 1 MILLION SPERM TO FERTILIZE ONE EGG? (they don't
stop to ask directions)
4. WHY DO MEN SNORE WHEN THEY LIE ON THEIR BACKS?
(because their balls fall over their butt-hole... and they vapor lock)
(You're laughing, aren't you?!?!)
5. WHY WERE MEN GIVEN LARGER BRAINS THAN DOGS?
(so they won't hump women's legs at cocktails parties)
6. WHY DID GOD MAKE MEN BEFORE WOMEN?
(you need a rough draft before you make a final copy)
7. HOW MANY MEN DOES IT TAKE TO PUT A TOILET SEAT DOWN?
(don't know.....it never happened)
( C'mon guys, we laugh at your blonde jokes!)
And my personal favorite:
8. WHY DID GOD PUT MEN ON EARTH?
(because a vibrator can't mow the lawn)
ran57gr said:All that scratching.... maybe he's totally confused and thinks he's picking his nose...??
Ok, I'm going to look for Lance... but I warn you, he's shy and very serious
I will get a rope....Are you good with knots? I found this...it describes Snakey perfectly!! Along with 99.9% of the rest of the make population!!
1. WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX?
(because they are plugged into a genius)
2. WHY DON'T WOMEN BLINK DURING SEX?
(they don't have enough time)
3. WHY DOES IT TAKE 1 MILLION SPERM TO FERTILIZE ONE EGG? (they don't
stop to ask directions)
4. WHY DO MEN SNORE WHEN THEY LIE ON THEIR BACKS?
(because their balls fall over their butt-hole... and they vapor lock)
(You're laughing, aren't you?!?!)
5. WHY WERE MEN GIVEN LARGER BRAINS THAN DOGS?
(so they won't hump women's legs at cocktails parties)
6. WHY DID GOD MAKE MEN BEFORE WOMEN?
(you need a rough draft before you make a final copy)
7. HOW MANY MEN DOES IT TAKE TO PUT A TOILET SEAT DOWN?
(don't know.....it never happened)
( C'mon guys, we laugh at your blonde jokes!)
And my personal favorite:
8. WHY DID GOD PUT MEN ON EARTH?
(because a vibrator can't mow the lawn)
Galene
Inoperative
- Joined
- May 7, 2002
- Posts
- 88,816
may I add a few...?
He said . . . I don't now why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She said . . . You wear pants don't you?
He said . . .Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said . . . That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!
He said .. . . What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
She said . . .Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
He said . . . Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?
She said . . I would but you're never there.
On a wall in a ladies room . . . "My husband follows me everywhere"
Written just below it . . . " I do not"
Q. How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?
A. Both of them.
Q. Why did the man cross the road?
A. He heard the chicken was a slut.
Q. Why don't women blink during foreplay?
A. They don't have time
Q. What do men and sperm have in common?
A. They both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human being.
Q. How does a man show that he is planning for the future?
A. He buys two cases of beer.
Q. What is the difference between men and government bonds?
A. The bonds mature.
Q. Why are blonde jokes so short?
A. So men can remember them.
Q. How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
A. We don't know; it has never happened.
Q. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking?
A They already have boyfriends.
Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A. A widow.
Q. Why are married women heavier than single women?
A. Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.
Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
Q. What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?
A. They're married.
Man says to God: "God, why did you make woman so beautiful?"
God says: "So you would love her."
But God," the man says, "why did you make her so dumb?"
God says: "So she would love you."
He said . . . I don't now why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She said . . . You wear pants don't you?
He said . . .Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said . . . That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!
He said .. . . What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
She said . . .Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
He said . . . Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?
She said . . I would but you're never there.
On a wall in a ladies room . . . "My husband follows me everywhere"
Written just below it . . . " I do not"
Q. How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?
A. Both of them.
Q. Why did the man cross the road?
A. He heard the chicken was a slut.
Q. Why don't women blink during foreplay?
A. They don't have time
Q. What do men and sperm have in common?
A. They both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human being.
Q. How does a man show that he is planning for the future?
A. He buys two cases of beer.
Q. What is the difference between men and government bonds?
A. The bonds mature.
Q. Why are blonde jokes so short?
A. So men can remember them.
Q. How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
A. We don't know; it has never happened.
Q. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking?
A They already have boyfriends.
Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A. A widow.
Q. Why are married women heavier than single women?
A. Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.
Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
Q. What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?
A. They're married.
Man says to God: "God, why did you make woman so beautiful?"
God says: "So you would love her."
But God," the man says, "why did you make her so dumb?"
God says: "So she would love you."
NAKEYSNAKEY
ORGASM DONOR :)~~<
- Joined
- Aug 3, 2002
- Posts
- 12,156
Witch Eve said:I will get a rope....Are you good with knots? I found this...it describes Snakey perfectly!! Along with 99.9% of the rest of the make population!!
ran57gr...May I add a few?
Har har har! You two think your funny....well...you both deserve a man like this!!.....he is perfect!!
A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.
"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" the man asked.
"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."
"Will you spend this on greens fees at a golf course instead of food?" the man asked.
"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"
"Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead of food?" the man asked.
"What disease would I get for ten lousy bucks?" exclaimed the homeless man.
"Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting."
The man replied, "That's okay. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer, fishing, golf, and sex."
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Witch Eve
Literotica Guru
- Joined
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- Posts
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Snake91143 said:Witch Eve said:I will get a rope....Are you good with knots? I found this...it describes Snakey perfectly!! Along with 99.9% of the rest of the make population!!
ran57gr...May I add a few?
Har har har! You two think your funny....well...you both deserve a man like this!!.....he is perfect!!
A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.
"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" the man asked.
"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."
"Will you spend this on greens fees at a golf course instead of food?" the man asked.
"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"
"Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead of food?" the man asked.
"What disease would I get for ten lousy bucks?" exclaimed the homeless man.
"Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting."
The man replied, "That's okay. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer, fishing, golf, and sex."
Snakey...your out of luck...That man has some potential!!
at the least he is younger..a shave and a haircut and your out of luck..what do you think Rania..her is cute huh? and of course we both know he will have a bigger dick than Snakey! I have my priorities!!
Lance!! You still available? The tub is all hot...I put some fragrances in it...and Snakeys beer fridge is full of white wine.....hop in! Let me and Ran ravish you!! We don't like that wrinkled old scaly reptile anymore...but we will keep him around to fetch our wine!!
Lance Hardrock
Your Cunning Linguist
- Joined
- Nov 14, 2001
- Posts
- 16,502
Witch Eve said:Lance!! You still available? The tub is all hot...I put some fragrances in it...and Snakeys beer fridge is full of white wine.....hop in! Let me and Ran ravish you!! We don't like that wrinkled old scaly reptile anymore...but we will keep him around to fetch our wine!!
Honey, I'm always available for you.
Galene
Inoperative
- Joined
- May 7, 2002
- Posts
- 88,816
Witch Eve said:Snake91143 said:Snakey...your out of luck...That man has some potential!!
at the least he is younger..a shave and a haircut and your out of luck..what do you think Rania..her is cute huh? and of course we both know he will have a bigger dick than Snakey! I have my priorities!!
Lance!! You still available? The tub is all hot...I put some fragrances in it...and Snakeys beer fridge is full of white wine.....hop in! Let me and Ran ravish you!! We don't like that wrinkled old scaly reptile anymore...but we will keep him around to fetch our wine!!
Why bother with a shave and haircut?? Let's put a paper bag over his head and play with his dick
Lance Hardrock
Your Cunning Linguist
- Joined
- Nov 14, 2001
- Posts
- 16,502
ran57gr said:Witch Eve said:
Why bother with a shave and haircut?? Let's put a paper bag over his head and play with his dick
That'll work for Snakey, but what about me?
Lance Hardrock
Your Cunning Linguist
- Joined
- Nov 14, 2001
- Posts
- 16,502
ran57gr said:Lance Hardrock said:we'll give you a pubic hair shave and play with your dick
hmmm, well there is some stubble down there, but you could probably just lick it off.
*shaves everyday*
Lance Hardrock
Your Cunning Linguist
- Joined
- Nov 14, 2001
- Posts
- 16,502
Witch Eve said:Witch Eve said:I am ready to start licking - I'll start at the waist and work my way down
Works for me, as long as you allow me to lick you too.
didijune48
sassy girl .)
- Joined
- Oct 10, 2004
- Posts
- 2,506
Just Found That!
And lLMAO !!!!!
didi
Witch Eve said:I will get a rope....Are you good with knots? I found this...it describes Snakey perfectly!! Along with 99.9% of the rest of the make population!!
1. WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX?
(because they are plugged into a genius)
2. WHY DON'T WOMEN BLINK DURING SEX?
(they don't have enough time)
3. WHY DOES IT TAKE 1 MILLION SPERM TO FERTILIZE ONE EGG? (they don't
stop to ask directions)
4. WHY DO MEN SNORE WHEN THEY LIE ON THEIR BACKS?
(because their balls fall over their butt-hole... and they vapor lock)
(You're laughing, aren't you?!?!)
5. WHY WERE MEN GIVEN LARGER BRAINS THAN DOGS?
(so they won't hump women's legs at cocktails parties)
6. WHY DID GOD MAKE MEN BEFORE WOMEN?
(you need a rough draft before you make a final copy)
7. HOW MANY MEN DOES IT TAKE TO PUT A TOILET SEAT DOWN?
(don't know.....it never happened)
( C'mon guys, we laugh at your blonde jokes!)
And my personal favorite:
8. WHY DID GOD PUT MEN ON EARTH?
(because a vibrator can't mow the lawn)
And lLMAO !!!!!
didi
didijune48
sassy girl .)
- Joined
- Oct 10, 2004
- Posts
- 2,506
ran57gr said:He said . . . I don't now why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She said . . . You wear pants don't you?
He said . . .Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said . . . That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!
He said .. . . What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
She said . . .Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
He said . . . Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?
She said . . I would but you're never there.
On a wall in a ladies room . . . "My husband follows me everywhere"
Written just below it . . . " I do not"
Q. How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?
A. Both of them.
Q. Why did the man cross the road?
A. He heard the chicken was a slut.
Q. Why don't women blink during foreplay?
A. They don't have time
Q. What do men and sperm have in common?
A. They both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human being.
Q. How does a man show that he is planning for the future?
A. He buys two cases of beer.
Q. What is the difference between men and government bonds?
A. The bonds mature.
Q. Why are blonde jokes so short?
A. So men can remember them.
Q. How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
A. We don't know; it has never happened.
Q. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking?
A They already have boyfriends.
Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A. A widow.
Q. Why are married women heavier than single women?
A. Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.
Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
Q. What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?
A. They're married.
Man says to God: "God, why did you make woman so beautiful?"
God says: "So you would love her."
But God," the man says, "why did you make her so dumb?"
God says: "So she would love you."
NOW?! Rolling on the floor LMAO !!!
Didi
NAKEYSNAKEY
ORGASM DONOR :)~~<
- Joined
- Aug 3, 2002
- Posts
- 12,156
ran57gr said:Witch Eve said:
Why bother with a shave and haircut?? Let's put a paper bag over his head and play with his dick
GREAT IDEA!!!!
Galene
Inoperative
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- Posts
- 88,816
Witch Eve
Literotica Guru
- Joined
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- Posts
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ran57gr said:
You need a new translator...that is not a dream........ its a NIGHTMARE!!!
