Erotic Samplings

[Problem Child]

Muffie, yore skeerin' me now...

Ollie...no, for the last time, yore the ph-ph-ph-phag.

~jumps up and down, slaps face rapidly, cracks knuckles, flops on floor and spins around~

"whoop-whooop-whooop-whooop-whooop, nyuck-nyuck-nyuk....missed me!"

 

[Problem Child]

don't make me put your bells in a sling

Don't make me ride you hard and put you up wet, little cowgirl.

 

[Debbie]

OFOCROFLMAOSHGPMSHNMP

(oops fell off chair now rolling on floor laughing my ass off sob hic gonna puke my sides hurt no more please )

 

[Calamity Jane]

Don't make me ride you hard and put you up wet, little cowgirl.

Oh darlin, you tempt me so

 

[KillerMuffin]

Okay okay, some reality checks in Muffster land. What should I throw up on the board? Huhm. I dunno. Stuff?

Let's try... An Acidic Tiger

The dark always brought the fear, the stale tension, the hatred, and the helplessness. Nothing stopped it, not a nightlight, not hiding, not even the comforting radio. It was inexorable as sunset.

The room was large and cool, situated in the basement as it was. Still, it was claustrophobic to the point of stifling. She curled at the top of the bed, quivering in muzzled rage and terrified pain. Was it time? The soft creak of the steps, the muffled whoosh of footsteps on carpet, the gentle creak of the doorknob sounded like a death knell. Silently, it had been well oiled, the door swung open, admitting the darkened figure, then quietly clicked shut.

The stillness of this first moment always struck her as odd. Him standing by the shut door, regarding her as if to reconsider, and her staring in dumbstruck wistfulness. Maybe, just maybe tonight, he would leave. As always, moments after he'd slithered inside, the tableau was broken. He took first one step, then another, and another, until he had shuffled his way to her bed. The nightlight only served to intensify his demonic presence. Illuminating one side of him, he seemed only that much more brutishly evil.

His fingers rose smoothly to his shirt, gently undoing one button at a time with clockwork precision. Each loosened, mother-of-pearl button was a clock tick closer to the horror of his zipper working its way down. She shut her eyes, praying a hopeless prayer for a savior that never came. Methodically, he folded and placed his clothing in a neat pile on her night table, as if each crease were as important as life itself.



(Am I the only one who clued in on providing a useful link? Yes, the Muffster is a genius. You may worship at my feet. Where'd everyone go? Hello? Drat.)

 

[Problem Child]

Oh darlin, you tempt me so

Are you saying I might be able to corral you into horsing around?

 

[Calamity Jane]

Are you saying I might be able to corral you into horsing around?

you may be able to rope me into something

 

[Calamity Jane]

(Am I the only one who clued in on providing a useful link? Yes, the Muffster is a genius. You may worship at my feet. Where'd everyone go? Hello? Drat.)

(am i a genuis too then Muffin? See the useful link in my sig)

 

[Problem Child]

You realize we could keep this up all night, right?

 

[Calamity Jane]

up all night? ya think?

 

[Problem Child]

I like being your straight man, you're easy to set up...

 

[Calamity Jane]

oh, so now I'm easy?

 

[Problem Child]

oh, so now I'm easy?

What do you mean now?

 

[Calamity Jane]

what's so hard to understand about NOW?

 

[Problem Child]

Now, as opposed to, "you mean you haven't always been easy."

 

[Calamity Jane]

Now as in, yes... right now i'm easy

but it's entirely possible i've always been that way

 

[Problem Child]

Do I gather from that other thread that you live in Kansas, Dorothy? I'd love to do Muffie, and you, and your little dog Toto too.

Uh, scratch Toto, I don't wanna get all that shit started again.

 

[KillerMuffin]

So there really was something to that dog licking pussy then PC thing... eww. You know Tiggs lives bout 5 hours north of here. *blinks innocently*

Damn, you didn't have to smack me on the ass.

 

[Calamity Jane]

I no longer reside in the sunflower state. moved across the river. but with an offer like that (excluding toto) i could drive across the bridge.

 

[Problem Child]

muffie

That comment deserves a full-on spanking, with floggers and nipple clamps.

See what you're doing, turning me away from my extreme nillaness? I'm gonna be pm'ing Cym like madman for advice on how to administer your punishment for comments like that.

 

[KillerMuffin]

Oh stop it, you're getting me all wet. cym isn't up on her Nutella finesse, so don't forget to bring your own savvy.

 

[Calamity Jane]

turning around and driving safely back into missouri... lol

 

[KillerMuffin]

Don't worry, p, he likes to be chained to the bed and licked for hours on end. *grins wickedly*

 

[Calamity Jane]

well then... where'd i put those chains...?




do you suppose DCL is gonna be upset that we've completely hijacked his thread?

 

[Problem Child]

Sometimes I wish I lived in a smaller country. Like Lichtenstein.