Erotic conversation?

[NotWise]

Have you tried writing dialogue intended to arouse the reader? I don't mean come-ons or pillow talk, but erotic content in the dialogue.

I've done it in some previous stories in the form of story telling. One character relates an erotic story to another. I've also done it as a kink, where one character wants the other to tell them about their illicit erotic encounters.

I'm trying now to write a story where the conversation itself might be arousing to the reader. It's hard to do. "You're hot. Lets fuck" by itself isn't arousing.

I'm on my third pass through this conversation, and there might be more. How do you do it?

 

[SimonDoom]

Have you tried writing dialogue intended to arouse the reader? I don't mean come-ons or pillow talk, but erotic content in the dialogue.

I've done it in some previous stories in the form of story telling. One character relates an erotic story to another. I've also done it as a kink, where one character wants the other to tell them about their illicit erotic encounters.

I'm trying now to write a story where the conversation itself might be arousing to the reader. It's hard to do. "You're hot. Lets fuck" by itself isn't arousing.

I'm on my third pass through this conversation, and there might be more. How do you do it?

For the dialogue/conversation to be erotic, it should be a seduction. One person is trying to seduce the other. Or perhaps both are trying to seduce each other.

Ask yourself: If you were on the receiving end of such a conversation, what would arouse you? What sort of dialogue would seduce you and arouse you?

I think if you figure that out you'll have your answer.

 

[KeithD]

Have you tried writing dialogue intended to arouse the reader? I don't mean come-ons or pillow talk, but erotic content in the dialogue.

Well, of course.

 

[NotWise]

For the dialogue/conversation to be erotic, it should be a seduction. One person is trying to seduce the other. Or perhaps both are trying to seduce each other.

Ask yourself: If you were on the receiving end of such a conversation, what would arouse you? What sort of dialogue would seduce you and arouse you?

Maybe that's the way to do it. I hope not. None of my previous attempts at erotic content through dialogue involved a seduction. They mostly involve story-telling.

In my case, a young man has been recruited as a gigolo. He's describing his first client to his agent, and I want their conversation to carry the erotic content. I imagine more of a give-and-take than is implied by story-telling.

 

[ElectricBlue]

It depends on the scene, obviously. Here's an extract from one of mine where dialogue is being used to push buttons:

"Not alone, Maddy, not like in your toilet cubicle. We want to fuck you slowly, so slowly, drive you out of your mind." Juliette knew the woman's triggers, knew which buttons to push, and she took control now, seeing the older woman sprawled gash naked, her cunt shining in the glistening light. Juliette might be gentle with Adam, but she knew Maddy didn't want that.

"I know what you need, Maddy, and right now that's a three fingered fuck. Ahh, yes, see, you do want that. See, Adam, I told you. Maddy's a slut fuck tramp. She can't hide it. She pays for sex, did she tell you? Three hundred bucks, I'm worth more than that, don't you think?"

Juliette took the straps by Madelyn's feet and bound her ankles to the chair's frame, wrapping the leather twice around each red velvet boot. "We don't need to strap her hands, she's not going anywhere. Not when I do this."

She kneeled before Madelyn's sex, looking closely at the folds and petals there, before taking the whole wet place into her mouth, sucking at the woman without mercy. She tunnelled and probed with her tongue, eliciting a long moan from Madelyn, "Oohh, fuu...uck yes, you little bitch, eat me, take me with your mouth."

"Don't call me a bitch, fucking whore. Look at you, spread wide for anyone to take. Slut fuck Madelyn. How many men have fucked you, all strapped up and dripping? Adam, fill her mouth. I don't want to hear her talk.

"See, Maddy, he does what he's told when it's me. That's right, Adam, let the tramp suck you, slide that cock down her throat." Juliette was fucking Maddy now, her fingers fast in the bound woman's cunt, fucking her fast like the first time they'd met. Adam had gone to the head of the chair, where Maddy turned her head to take him deep into her throat.

"That's impressive, Madelyn, where'd you learn to suck cock like that?" Juliette pounded Maddy's cunt with her fingers, jerking the woman's body up on the chair with each thrust.

 

[KeithD]

I'm not using such conversations to arouse the characters in the story--when I get down to straightforward, graphic sexual verbal exchanges between characters I'm working directly on the reader's arousal.

 

[NotWise]

EB said:

It depends on the scene, obviously. Here's an extract from one of mine where dialogue is being used to push buttons:

Good scene. I'd have to know the characters better to appreciate it more.

KeithD said:

I'm not using such conversations to arouse the characters in the story--when I get down to straightforward, graphic sexual verbal exchanges between characters I'm working directly on the reader's arousal.

I might have to rethink this. In the context of the story, the conversation is supposed to work directly on the reader more than it does between the characters. The characters have conflicts, so that maybe the conversation shouldn't be so arousing for them.

My approach so far has been time-consuming. I wrote the basic conversation then refined the context and the characters in a second writing. I built more erotic content into the conversation on a third writing. I'm sure there will be more.

Dialogue seems like a very complicated way to write erotica, but it's the way I want the characters to work. It may not be very practical.

 

[vanmyers86]

Dialogue seems like a very complicated way to write erotica, but it's the way I want the characters to work. It may not be very practical.

It may not be practical, but it has the potential to be very arousing indeed. Think about the times you've had phone sex, or written someone a steamy email - weren't those words fun to choose as you calculated the effect they would have on your partner? If I were writing a scene like yours, that's probably how I would approach it: with the people deliberately trying to entice and ensnare - coincidentally, your own goal with the reader.

 

[Inkhorn]

You might also want to consider listening to some of the audio stuff on LIT. Just a thought.

 

[SamScribble]

Here's a short story from a while ago which is nothing but erotic conversation. https://www.literotica.com/s/speaking-of-louise It was pretty well received - although it is one of my lower scores. And don't ask me why Laurel put it in Loving Wives. Oh, well ...

 

[BelleCanzuto]

In the context of the story, the conversation is supposed to work directly on the reader more than it does between the characters. The characters have conflicts, so that maybe the conversation shouldn't be so arousing for them.

Vanmyers86 said what I was going to about thinking of it like phone sex, or extended dirty talk while making out. But I think one of your difficulties is not knowing what will arouse the reader, since you don't know who's reading it. When you talk dirty to a partner, you know what that partner likes and wants to hear. It helps narrow the universe of possibilities of things to say. But in this case, you're wanting to have words come out of one person's mouth, aimed at another person who isn't supposed to get turned on, but at the same time have a person who's essentially eavesdropping become turned on.

So that speaks to basic, generic come ons.

From what you've said about the story, it's almost like the guy who's the new gigolo is auditioning. Like he's using his verbal skills to show the recruiter that he can arouse anyone. But he'd almost still have to have a person in mind, in order to have it sound believable. So, that might be part of the key. Who would your gigolo and his recruiter imagine themselves talking to, in an ideal situation? What kind of partner would they want to be talking to, and what would that partner likely want to hear? Sort of like what Simon said, except substituting an idealized partner for you.

That might help you nail down a tone and a vocabulary.

 

[NotWise]

Here's a short story from a while ago which is nothing but erotic conversation. https://www.literotica.com/s/speaking-of-louise It was pretty well received - although it is one of my lower scores. And don't ask me why Laurel put it in Loving Wives. Oh, well ...

What a fun read! I think I enjoyed every word.

 

[HeyAll]

I love confessionals in erotica dialogue.

Not when one character is necessarily trying to entice the other.

But when a character is getting something off her chest, it can be really hot.

 

[KeithD]

If the arousal techniques I use with my readers don't work with particular readers, I don't need them as readers. I try not to do any common denominator pabulum erotica writing. I rarely put any wordage into getting a character over sexual inhibitions or needing a lot of preparation to swing into sex. My characters are usually seeking it and they usually are straightforward and graphic in setting the deal--and, again, I'm working on arousing the reader with this dialogue, not primarily the characters. That's what I offer a reader. If that's what they want to read (and I'm content with the volume of readers that do), that's what they'll get. If not, they are urged to go read someone else because I simply will not write to please as many readers and upset as few readers as possible. That results in formula pabulum.

 

[NotWise]

From what you've said about the story, it's almost like the guy who's the new gigolo is auditioning. Like he's using his verbal skills to show the recruiter that he can arouse anyone. But he'd almost still have to have a person in mind, in order to have it sound believable. So, that might be part of the key. Who would your gigolo and his recruiter imagine themselves talking to, in an ideal situation? What kind of partner would they want to be talking to, and what would that partner likely want to hear? Sort of like what Simon said, except substituting an idealized partner for you.

The phone sex analogy isn't good for me. I never cared for phone sex, or for online chat sex. I also don't have anything against them unless they involve kids. I moderated an old multi-user chat domain for a while and found myself protecting kids more often than I thought I should have.

I hadn't taken the step to where he was intentionally trying to arouse his interviewer. That's useful, and it actually fits for about the second half of the conversation.

 

[Javahead]

I've tried. Though, if not as skillfully as I'd like, I've done far more direct erotic conversations, banter, and verbal role playing than the storytelling scenario you describe.

Conversations are fun to write, and one of the temptations I work to resist is turning long stretches of the story into prolonged ones.

 

[ElectricBlue]

What a fun read! I think I enjoyed every word.

Sam's stories are like that, delightfully naughty and not at all crude. One can imagine the cottage, the tea and scones, and the colourful blankets on the bed and...

 

[SimonDoom]

In my case, a young man has been recruited as a gigolo. He's describing his first client to his agent, and I want their conversation to carry the erotic content. I imagine more of a give-and-take than is implied by story-telling.

I'm not sure I quite understand what you want to do. It sounds like you have character A (gigolo) recounting an erotic encounter to character B (agent). So it will be primarily a narration of the encounter, but in the form of a dialogue between A and B. You want the narration to be erotic for the reader of the story. A few questions:

I assume the story is from the agent's standpoint. Otherwise, why would the encounter be narrated in the form of a dialogue? Why wouldn't it be related in the form of narrative from A's point of view?

What's the purpose of the dialogue in the context of the story? If A isn't trying to seduce B with words, then it isn't likely that A would take the time and effort to tell the story in a way that's particularly arousing. Why would A tell the story to B in a way that's sexy and arousing for the reader?

Narrative in the form of dialogue in a story is tricky, because it has to be handled carefully to be realistic. People don't talk the way writers write. Their speech is less formal and less grammatical, and usually the vocabulary is more limited. It might sound less erotic if it's more realistic.

Ask yourself: why do you want the erotic encounter narrated this way? What's the purpose? Presumably there is a dramatic purpose to A telling the story to B, but it sounds like it's not an erotic/seductive purpose. So what is the purpose? And does that purpose fit with also turning on the reader? I can't tell.

 

[NotWise]

I'm not sure I quite understand what you want to do. It sounds like you have character A (gigolo) recounting an erotic encounter to character B (agent). So it will be primarily a narration of the encounter, but in the form of a dialogue between A and B. You want the narration to be erotic for the reader of the story. A few questions:

I assume the story is from the agent's standpoint. Otherwise, why would the encounter be narrated in the form of a dialogue? Why wouldn't it be related in the form of narrative from A's point of view?

The story is third person omniscient, and about the relationship between the gigolo and his agent, not about the relationships of the gigolo to their clients. A narrative entirely from the gigolo's point of view would be irrelevant to the story.

What's the purpose of the dialogue in the context of the story? If A isn't trying to seduce B with words, then it isn't likely that A would take the time and effort to tell the story in a way that's particularly arousing. Why would A tell the story to B in a way that's sexy and arousing for the reader?

The two characters already have a relationship. No seduction required. The conversation is to move their relationship forward and to develop the characters.

Narrative in the form of dialogue in a story is tricky, because it has to be handled carefully to be realistic. People don't talk the way writers write. Their speech is less formal and less grammatical, and usually the vocabulary is more limited. It might sound less erotic if it's more realistic.

Ask yourself: why do you want the erotic encounter narrated this way? What's the purpose? Presumably there is a dramatic purpose to A telling the story to B, but it sounds like it's not an erotic/seductive purpose. So what is the purpose? And does that purpose fit with also turning on the reader? I can't tell.

Making the narration erotic is a problem on a couple fronts. The gigolo is describing a night on the job. From his point of view it isn't necessarily erotic. The other problem is that his agent is emotionally conflicted and her initial reaction is fear and jealousy, not arousal.

BellaCanzuto's response gave me a direction. The initial part of the conversation will be fairly bland, but the gigolo lies to get the agent over her initial reaction. When the gigolo realizes that she's starting to get aroused, he also starts embellishing the story to encourage her. The story he's telling becomes more explicit than it is at the outset, but the real eroticism is between the gigolo and his agent.

This implies at least one more rewrite.

 

[HHHawkeye]

Have you tried writing dialogue intended to arouse the reader? I don't mean come-ons or pillow talk, but erotic content in the dialogue.

I've done it in some previous stories in the form of story telling. One character relates an erotic story to another. I've also done it as a kink, where one character wants the other to tell them about their illicit erotic encounters.

I'm trying now to write a story where the conversation itself might be arousing to the reader. It's hard to do. "You're hot. Lets fuck" by itself isn't arousing.

I'm on my third pass through this conversation, and there might be more. How do you do it?

In the current in-progress part of Tales from the Embassy, I do a lot of the exposition about the premise, an island nation where all women are slaves because nearly all of them are so submissive that they want and enjoy that, by having one of the women born there talk excitedly to someone doing a documentary about what exactly is going to happen to her once she steps on the boat to head home. She, like all women born on that island, was sent away from it as a child because their society has no place in it for underage girls, and was raised in the free modern world her whole life, but the urge to submit and obey that runs in her very blood was always calling her back, and now she's decided it's finally time to get on the boat and accept her place in the world.

I have her explain a heck of a lot about how Bliservian slavery works and the process of enslavement by having it be explained by a woman who is actively excited and turned on by it. I thought it would be a good idea and it worked out surprisingly well.

 

[BelleCanzuto]

The phone sex analogy isn't good for me. I never cared for phone sex, or for online chat sex. I also don't have anything against them unless they involve kids. I moderated an old multi-user chat domain for a while and found myself protecting kids more often than I thought I should have.

I don't have anything against phone sex either, but I'm no good at it. I'm too literal, most of the time.

Filed under "one of those embarrassing thing you only admit anonymously":

Him: So, baby, what are you wearing?
Me: Erm, a t-shirt?
Him: Oooh, are you touching yourself?
Me: No
Pause
Me: Wait, am I supposed to be?

And it got worse from there

 

[ElectricBlue]

I don't have anything against phone sex either, but I'm no good at it. I'm too literal, most of the time.

Filed under "one of those embarrassing thing you only admit anonymously":

Him: So, baby, what are you wearing?
Me: Erm, a t-shirt?
Him: Oooh, are you touching yourself?
Me: No
Pause
Me: Wait, am I supposed to be?

And it got worse from there

There's a category for that - Letters and Transcripts. We expect a full report, Belle, complete with dial tones, small sighs and squeaks. Listen to a hamster wheel and write what you hear. Court reporters can do it, so can you .

 

[jehoram]

You might also want to consider listening to some of the audio stuff on LIT. Just a thought.

At least you'll get an idea of what works and what doesn't.

 

[OmnislashXX]

Eh, the whole second chapter of my cheerleader story is about a dirty conversation. Specifically, the girl ( a high school cheerleader) telling her friend's dad ( a straight laced, responsible adult) that she just doesn't like to wear those awful gym shorts under her skirt. The conversation gets pretty dirty, not to mention when his daughter joins the conversation unknowingly and he has the uncomfortable job of keeping his mouth shut less the cheerleader actually say something inappropriate in front of her.

Sometimes, you can just tease the reader with words.