Editor Wanted

[swallowedme]

Needed. Yes, you are wanted and needed. Special you.
I have a story I'd written some time ago and I just thought of how to delvelop it but first I need to know if it has any merit. It is slightly over 800 words and basically an introduction to the main character.

I have another story-start that I think showcases my writing style and the where and whys of my needing help. Though it is not erotica I am posting that little bit here and if you think may be able to offer some help please get in touch with me.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

~M

Man in the Park
Crazy Bill. Satellite Jack. His name was not Jack or Bill, or Tom or Sam. It had been a long time since he'd remembered his name and almost as long since he'd remembered he'd had a name to be forgotten. He was, to his own mind, God's man. To the world around him he was barely visible; one in any number of old men, wandering the city in army surplus clothing. Skin red, chapped and wrinkled, long thin patchy hair that flew up around his head and stuck out in all directions. One of any number of men, all unworthy of notice.
Unable to recall the days before his life started, he only remembered the waking up, bleary eyed and cold, as if a loud noise had startled him. A delicate layer of frost decorated his clothes and he marveled in how it sparkled and looked golden in the morning light. "How could this be? I am bejeweled."
Standing, he was aware of the light glinting off buildings and the morning sun warming him. With his hands in his pockets he started to walk. The sharp corners of papers pushed at his fingers and he pulled them, crumpled into balls, from his coat. There they were four scraps of paper. Crevice and shadow waiting to be revealed. Carrying them cupped in his dirty calloused hands, he walked without seeing to the nearest park bench and sat down.
Placing three in his lap, he opened the first. An advertisement for some suburban estates that claimed,"Beautiful design" and "all you could ever wish for". The second paper, a note from a parent to a child expressing eternal love and pride in whom they had become. The third paper, smoothed out at set on his knee was the first he had found, wrapped around a tree trunk, dirty and muddied. It had once been an interview with a politician but only part of the bold face title caption was still legible. "I am here for You!"
The last page was his daily affirmation, a flyer from the Peace Corps that ordered, "Do good works".
His daily ritual since that first day he had woken up to the loud boom in his head and found the words of God in his pocket.

 

[AsylumSeeker]

Let's Make This HOT

You have accdentally stumbled into the right place. I welcome you aboard.

 

[swallowedme]

That bad huh.
Well, maybe its the sample I added not being erotica that isn't hookin' you...
This was a start to something else...


From Housewife to Dominatrix in 6 Painful Lessons

There is a cage door barring the room from the vestibule. A note card on the table explains that you should strip; placing your folded clothes in the basket on the chair and then handcuff yourself before ringing the bell. She won't answer the door unless she can see you've done so.

After four months of coming here Tita still couldn't find a hidden camera or window, a two way mirror...anything that could allow Ms. to see whether or not you'd followed directions. There were various other things in the vestibule but Tita's favorite was the white board which displayed such sayings as, "gentle as a kitten", or "I'm a bit grumpy". These were warnings of what to expect, how to behave once inside. Gentle as a kitten meant Ms. would be forgiving if you forgot not to whimper. Grumpy meant you would leave sore and bruised and shaken.
A grad student Tita was studying human sexuality at the University of San Francisco. Her thesis had started as a condemnation of sexual deviants seeking violence for pleasure. That was before she met Ruth. Now she couldn't even remember what she had posed as her original argument.
Ms. had seen to that the very first visit.
All the clubs and interviews she'd been doing, at least once from everyone, she would hear some snippet about 'Ruth'.
"Yeah, Ms. really knows what it's all about." Was how one of the men she interviewed put it. And so she had to find out for herself.
Tracking down people that knew her, or at least of her, was easy. Finding someone that would arrange an introduction was a bit harder, but Tita had always been a very driven, very determined girl and soon enough she had an address and an appointment.
She showed up on time at a simple enough looking house where she rang the bell and was buzzed in. Entering the vestibule for the first time she was struck dumb. Deep red walls with hand painted gray and black swirling design, an old fashioned baroque style dresser and some odds and ends... The note was a shock; surely she wasn't expected to strip for an interview?

 

[swallowedme]

You have accdentally stumbled into the right place. I welcome you aboard.

Thank you.
All my life I have written but that doesn't mean I'm meant to write. I just want to at least try.
~M

 

[AsylumSeeker]

All Stories Have Merit

If all else fails I will help. I am a decent editor but a better mentor.

'NUFF SAID.