RobDownSouth
BoycotDivestSanctio
- Joined
- Apr 13, 2002
- Posts
- 77,951
Former Fox talking head "Judge" Jeannine Pirro stumbles badly in her first moment in the National Spotlight.
"Judge" Jeannine Pirro (famously lampooned repeatedly on Saturday Night Live for her often drunken ramblings on TV) seems to have forgotten much about courtroom procedures during her two decade long hiatus from the US court system.
Pirro, now President TACO Trump's US Attorney for the District of Columbia, inshtructed her federal prosecutors to "throw the book" at Sydney Lori Reed for failing to surrender her cell phone after being struck repeatedly by ICE agents who were upset that she was video taping them. One agent had his hand scratched in the melee (ICE agents are notorious for fighting like girly men) and Pirro in her infinite wine-fueled reasoning decided this merited an "up charge" to Enhanced Felonious Assault On A Government Agent, with an 8 year prison sentence.
That'll teach that bitch, right? RIGHT?
In order to go to a felony trial in federal court, evidence must be presented to a Grand Jury, which basically rubber stamps a case as having "Probable Cause" and sending it to trial.
Pirro done fucked up, though. Instead of sending one of the agents who was grievously crippled for life by Ms. Reed's fingernail, she sent an "investigator" (who had NOT been present when Reed was laying the fingernail smackdown on ICE agents) who spun a tale under oath (!!!) about "here's what REALLY happened". No evidence, no video, just a story. The fresh-out-of-law-school public defender rose and said, um, Grand Jury? This is not TV, and this is what's called "hearsay" and not allowed.....
The Grand Jury issued a rare "No Bill" decision, indicating their belief that there was not enough evidence to go to trial.
Oopsie!
Fortified by several more glasses of wine, Pirro demanded prosecutors present the same case AGAIN, before a different grand jury.
..... and Pirro done fucked up again.
Exact same scenario ensued. "Here's what REALLY happened" followed by "umm Hearsay" and ANOTHER "No Bill" from a different grand jury. No. Probable. Cause. aka "not a chance of a conviction in court".
The magistrate overseeing this clusterfuck of a case held a show cause hearing today. He dropped all bond and bail conditions on Sydney Lori Reed and released her on her own recognizance, over strenuous objections of federal prosecutors. The magistrate humored the pissy prosecutors by scheduling a hearing tomorrow to discuss why this case should NOT be dismissed for lack of merit.
I expect something along the lines of prosecutors saying "but...but...we REALLY REALLY REALLY want to prosecute her"
"Judge" Jeannine Pirro (famously lampooned repeatedly on Saturday Night Live for her often drunken ramblings on TV) seems to have forgotten much about courtroom procedures during her two decade long hiatus from the US court system.
Pirro, now President TACO Trump's US Attorney for the District of Columbia, inshtructed her federal prosecutors to "throw the book" at Sydney Lori Reed for failing to surrender her cell phone after being struck repeatedly by ICE agents who were upset that she was video taping them. One agent had his hand scratched in the melee (ICE agents are notorious for fighting like girly men) and Pirro in her infinite wine-fueled reasoning decided this merited an "up charge" to Enhanced Felonious Assault On A Government Agent, with an 8 year prison sentence.
That'll teach that bitch, right? RIGHT?
In order to go to a felony trial in federal court, evidence must be presented to a Grand Jury, which basically rubber stamps a case as having "Probable Cause" and sending it to trial.
Pirro done fucked up, though. Instead of sending one of the agents who was grievously crippled for life by Ms. Reed's fingernail, she sent an "investigator" (who had NOT been present when Reed was laying the fingernail smackdown on ICE agents) who spun a tale under oath (!!!) about "here's what REALLY happened". No evidence, no video, just a story. The fresh-out-of-law-school public defender rose and said, um, Grand Jury? This is not TV, and this is what's called "hearsay" and not allowed.....
The Grand Jury issued a rare "No Bill" decision, indicating their belief that there was not enough evidence to go to trial.
Oopsie!
Fortified by several more glasses of wine, Pirro demanded prosecutors present the same case AGAIN, before a different grand jury.
..... and Pirro done fucked up again.
Exact same scenario ensued. "Here's what REALLY happened" followed by "umm Hearsay" and ANOTHER "No Bill" from a different grand jury. No. Probable. Cause. aka "not a chance of a conviction in court".
The magistrate overseeing this clusterfuck of a case held a show cause hearing today. He dropped all bond and bail conditions on Sydney Lori Reed and released her on her own recognizance, over strenuous objections of federal prosecutors. The magistrate humored the pissy prosecutors by scheduling a hearing tomorrow to discuss why this case should NOT be dismissed for lack of merit.
I expect something along the lines of prosecutors saying "but...but...we REALLY REALLY REALLY want to prosecute her"
