Drawn Like a Moth to the Flame...

[English Lady]

What attracts you to a person? Not just that but what personality traits or certain physical attributes really gets you going even though you know that in the eyes of most people they are unattractive qualities?


For example I go weak kneed over arrogant player type men. A bit of arrogant charm gets me every time but I know that it will only lead me to heart ache more often than not.


I also love hairy legs.....oooooooh yes really hairy, hairy legs. yum.


So what turns you on but you suspect turns most other people off?

 

[Lucifer_Carroll]

Cynicism and intelligence. Not just schooling intelligence or even without schooling intelligence, but that real intelligence that likes to put the world through a wringer and can spring off-the-cuff philosophies that cut. And at least a touch of cynicism. Something that doesn't always believe that the world is puppy dogs and rainbows like a vapid sorority twat.

And madness. Most important of all. What really attaches me to a person, friend or lover even if they are low on the above two is having some fucked-upedness in them. The ability to maintain a twisted conversation, a strange sense of humour, and all that jazz. Basically being crazy enough that they don't flee at the first sight of who I am inside.

 

[SnoopDog]

I like girls with glasses.
Now I know a lot of men are turned on by this but I don't mean sexually (though that turns me on as well) and I certainly don't mean supermodels with glasses.

I mean those geeky-kinda girls with glasses.

And I also dig chicks with small but pointy breasts.

Snoopy

 

[English Lady]

LC.. I think everyone should look for a bit of crazy in their partner. Keeps things spicy! But I do know what you mean with that one myself.


Snoop... my hubby seems partial to a girlie in glasses and i like men in them. I think it's the way they enlargen the eyes. I love eyes.

 

[Guest]

 

[CharleyH]

In women, an overly intelligent 20 year old any day of the week. I love them slim, tall, dark haired and small breasted - The small breast fetish would probably not be on a lot of men's top lists, but that's ok, more for me . Exceptional creativity and a mind filled with a world of possibilities and openness is always attractive. I also love a woman with class.

In men, I like them young, bare-chested, toned, tall and slim, preferring blond but have dated darker as well, and in this pursuit, I don't care if they are intelligent - as long as they know how to use it and don't overstay their welcome.

 

[Colleen Thomas]

Expresive eyes. I had a GF for a while who it would be kind to say was butt-ugly. Thin face, overly wide lips, heavy brow ridge and a flat nose that had been broken a time or two and seemd to spread out over her face. Didn't make a bit of difference to me, I could read her emotions in her eyes and when she looked at me and was hungry...Chills

Intelligence. Either superior intellect or the aquired wisdom of years. I think Oggbashan and Dita are two of the sexiest people I have ever known. Charley and Lauren-hynde too.

Humor. If you can make me smile more often than frown, you are well on your way to my bed, if that's where you want to go. Either dry, witty humor like Rumple or earthy, bawdy humor like Pops. Two very sexy guys, and it takes a bit for me to define a guy as sexy

And of course down. I do love my goose

-Colly

 

[English Lady]

Intelligence and humour seem to figure high here.

maybe they are attractive features but for some reason we perceieve them as not being...weird eh?

 

[fogbank]

I like girls with glasses.
Now I know a lot of men are turned on by this but I don't mean sexually (though that turns me on as well) and I certainly don't mean supermodels with glasses.

I mean those geeky-kinda girls with glasses.

You said it. Though I've gotta say, for me it makes a big difference depending on whether they've got the right type of glasses. Nothing nicer than a nice pair of deep brown eyes behind a set of tortoise-shell frames, or green eyes behind an elegant wire-frame set. Also, a propensity for looking at me over the tops of the glasses is really, really hot.

 

[Belegon]

Intelligence and humour seem to figure high here.

maybe they are attractive features but for some reason we perceieve them as not being...weird eh?

I think it is because of who the audience is...I think this board is predisposed to want more than just body parts because we are used to looking deeper when we write...over on the GB you might get a diff response...

intelligence (not schooling)... my best friend does not have a lot of schooling, but a razor sharp wit and very insightful, and yes, it is one of the things about her that tickles more than just my brain...

 

[English Lady]

I think it is because of who the audience is...I think this board is predisposed to want more than just body parts because we are used to looking deeper when we write...over on the GB you might get a diff response...

Ahhh I think you've got it there Belegon....I would post this on the general board just to see the response....but I am afraid of being ripped to shreds if I try!!!

 

[Guest]

Yeah, I go for sense of humour, confidence, strong personality and stature and so on, but one thing that I expect a lot of people don't go for, but which I do, massively, is the guy's ability to switch OFF his emotions for certain lengths of time when he is with me. Somebody BAD, with complete disregard for me, my comfort, everything else, is a huge turn on for me. But, I did say only for short periods of time, I couldn't cope with someone permanently like that.

Looks wise? He's gotta be bigger and stronger than me.

Lou

 

[SnoopDog]

LC.. I think everyone should look for a bit of crazy in their partner. Keeps things spicy! But I do know what you mean with that one myself.


Snoop... my hubby seems partial to a girlie in glasses and i like men in them. I think it's the way they enlargen the eyes. I love eyes.

Eyes. You can say that again, My Lady !!!!

Snoopy

 

[SnoopDog]

You said it. Though I've gotta say, for me it makes a big difference depending on whether they've got the right type of glasses. Nothing nicer than a nice pair of deep brown eyes behind a set of tortoise-shell frames, or green eyes behind an elegant wire-frame set. Also, a propensity for looking at me over the tops of the glasses is really, really hot.

Right. What I find funny though is that is seems that it doesn't work both ways.

Men (usually) are attracted by a pair of glasses on a girl whereas girls (usually) are turned off by a glasses-wearing guy.

Snoopy

 

[patrick1]

I swoon over a beautifully-shaped female sentence, myself.

patrick

 

[Guest]

I've posted this before. My 'type' is tall, lean, gaunt and pallid with a minimally baritone voice (often equals British or Russian). My friends say I like them consumptive. (Yeah, I love Chopin too.)

But that's just what 'gets' me instantly and viscerally. What is utterly essential is intelligence to match mine. And I'm not talking measurable IQ, but the maverick sort: creative, unique, quick. The bloke can be the opposite of my 'type' but seduce me to the ground with language and wit.

Perdita

 

[SnoopDog]

I've posted this before. My 'type' is tall, lean, gaunt and pallid with a minimally baritone voice (often equals British or Russian). My friends say I like them consumptive. (Yeah, I love Chopin too.)

But that's just what 'gets' me instantly and viscerally. What is utterly essential is intelligence to match mine. And I'm not talking measurable IQ, but the maverick sort: creative, unique, quick. The bloke can be the opposite of my 'type' but seduce me to the ground with language and wit.

Perdita

Inteeligence to match yours ? - Wow, you give the men of this planet a pretty hard time, lovely.

Snoopy

 

[impressive]

Integrity. A#1. Gotta have it or I ain't interested.

Next: Wit. Generosity (at least with time/energy ... not necessarily money). Self-confidence (NOT arrogance).

Smile, eyes, hands ... all nice.

What ISN'T important: Gender, age, height, weight

 

[English Lady]

you like them consumptive Perdita? What a mental image *chuckles* I do understand though, I have a soft spot for such men myself. My fist crush was on a lad with fair hair, fair eyes, fair skin and fairly no ass or other flesh to speak off but damn was he sexy.


Impressive..you mention hands. I like hands too but i like soft and smooth hands....nothing to knobbly or well worked with really. I like my hubbys hands because he's a programmer...he has them ost baby soft fingers *shudder*

 

[Guest]

I like 'em rough; hands, personality, facial hair, anything.

 

[Guest]

Initially? A pleasant face and a genuine smile.

From there it's mostly the mind and personality. I like someone I can converse with openly about anything. Someone who shares my twisted sense of humor. Someone who is comfortable just being there, with neither of us saying a word. Someone who niether gives nor takes, but shares.

Physical attributes? There are a hundred specific traits I look for. And a thousand exceptions to those specific criteria. I could define each one, dimensions, shapes, color and then fall head over heels for someone who is has none of those physical qualities.

The real beauty lies just below the visual aspect. The real beauty is in the heart and soul.

 

[LadyJeanne]

But that's just what 'gets' me instantly and viscerally. What is utterly essential is intelligence to match mine. And I'm not talking measurable IQ, but the maverick sort: creative, unique, quick. The bloke can be the opposite of my 'type' but seduce me to the ground with language and wit.

Perdita

Yes, yes, yes - quick, clever, funny, thoughtful, irreverent, silly, intellectual, conversations on all kinds of random topics makes me melt all over the floor.

If you add that 'knowing' eye contact, saying things with your eyes and understanding the meaning perfectly without a word, then I'm really hooked. It's so sexy to have your eyes meet when you're both thinking the same thing.

 

[CrazyyAngel]

... whereas girls (usually) are turned off by a glasses-wearing guy.

Well ... that explains a whole lot ...

As for the Topic ...

Initially? A pleasant face and a genuine smile.

From there it's mostly the mind and personality. I like someone I can converse with openly about anything. Someone who shares my twisted sense of humor. Someone who is comfortable just being there, with neither of us saying a word. Someone who niether gives nor takes, but shares.

Physical attributes? There are a hundred specific traits I look for. And a thousand exceptions to those specific criteria. I could define each one, dimensions, shapes, color and then fall head over heels for someone who is has none of those physical qualities.

The real beauty lies just below the visual aspect. The real beauty is in the heart and soul.

Couldn't have said it better ...

CA

 

[LadyJeanne]

BTW, I've also heard that if you meet someone you're attracted to, your pupils dilate. The dilated pupils also serve to make you more attractive to the other person. This is one of the reasons candle light is so effective for romance.

Apparently, this is all happening in the subconscious and you can't control it. But it might be useful to spot whether s/he's interested or not....

 

[English Lady]

LadyJeanne..isn't body language fascinating? the pupil dilation thing is very handy...not so much for online interaction though *chuckles*