Don't Read This Thread

[cloudy]

I saw chinese food in here.

I'm hungry.

 

[TE999]

"FIRST, STRANGLE YOUR GOOSE"

As opposed to choking your chicken?





(Aw-- like you didn't see that one coming)

 

[bluebell]

I saw chinese food in here.

I'm hungry.

Seems to be a popular sentiment.

Whose turn is it to cook dinner, people? We've got a hungry woman here.

 

[MagicaPractica]

Seems to be a popular sentiment.

Whose turn is it to cook dinner, people? We've got a hungry woman here.

My sis in law made brownies today and she's Chinese. Will that do?

 

[bluebell]

My sis in law made brownies today and she's Chinese. Will that do?

Maybe. It is hours later, after all. What if Cloudy got so hungry that she started to nibble her fingers?

Classic quote from Ghost World: "I'm so hungry I could chew the crotch out of a rag doll."

 

[tickledkitty]

I'm gonna have to go with no, kittyhead. Racing suuuucks.

WHAAAAAAATTTT??? Shame on you, Miss Bluebell smarty pants. That's positively un-American!

http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb308/tickledkitty/dale.jpg

RIP Dale. We you.

 

[trysail]

Got any two week old celery or pomekiwis for sale?

PORNEKIWIS ?? Hmmm, given the right set of circumstances, that sounds like sumpin' I could go for!

 

[MagicaPractica]

PORNEKIWIS ?? Hmmm, given the right set of circumstances, that sounds like sumpin' I could go for!

No, no no POM - ekiwis. Bluebell has them for sale. (Though I haven't seen my order of letter openers yet so she's not getting a very good Ebay rating from me.)

 

[tickledkitty]

Racin' Rawks!!!

Look, they even made movies about it.

http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb308/tickledkitty/rickybobby.jpg

http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb308/tickledkitty/daysofthunder.jpg

Now, how can you NOT love that??

 

[tickledkitty]

Then there's Dale Jr. American as apple pie.

http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb308/tickledkitty/dalejr.jpg

 

[jomar]

http://www.chinatownconnection.com/images/cuisine-hunan01.jpg

...Oh. You said "human", not "hunan".

I got sushi. And shrimp. And sandwich rolls. Yum.

 

[bluebell]

No, no no POM - ekiwis. Bluebell has them for sale. (Though I haven't seen my order of letter openers yet so she's not getting a very good Ebay rating from me.)

I think he likes the idea of PORNEKIWIS better.

And, come on. Everyone else has given me glowing reviews.
Tell you what. I'll throw in a free pack of Vine Bras. They're awesome. You put a tiny seedling against your skin and it immediately begins curling and flowering until it covers, well, everything you want it to. How 'bout it?

 

[MagicaPractica]

I think he likes the idea of PORNEKIWIS better.

And, come on. Everyone else has given me glowing reviews.
Tell you what. I'll throw in a free pack of Vine Bras. They're awesome. You put a tiny seedling against your skin and it immediately begins curling and flowering until it covers, well, everything you want it to. How 'bout it?

Sold! Should make for a lovely av.

 

[bluebell]

WHAAAAAAATTTT??? Shame on you, Miss Bluebell smarty pants. That's positively un-American!

Sadly, I hear those words all the time.
Have I ever mentioned that I don't like pie of any kind? Particularly apple? *braces herself for the fallout*

(I do really like Talladega Nights, though. I will buy that movie one day.)

I got sushi. And shrimp. And sandwich rolls. Yum.

But, are you human?
Or are you a human sub-species- a.k.a.- a Goober Gobblerian?

 

[bluebell]

Sold! Should make for a lovely av.

We cannot wait to see.

 

[tickledkitty]

Have I ever mentioned that I don't like pie of any kind? Particularly apple? *braces herself for the fallout*

No, you haven't. Not a real big pie fan myself.

I think I have you beat though, because I don't like chocolate. blech

 

[jomar]

Sadly, I hear those words all the time.
Have I ever mentioned that I don't like pie of any kind? Particularly apple? *braces herself for the fallout*

Don't you admire my restraint here?

(I do really like Talladega Nights, though. I will buy that movie one day.)

I plan one day to have a Will Ferrell movie fest. And maybe check out his web comedy.

But, are you human?
Or are you a human sub-species- a.k.a.- a Goober Gobblerian?

I may be the uber goober gobbler - according to my troll. Goober gobblers are humanistic.

 

[trysail]

Given the audience, starting a thread titled "Don't Read This Thread" on AH is truly akin to shooting fish in a barrel. I mean, c'mon! Whaddya think we are-- a bunch of children utterly lacking any self-control? (Don't answer that!)

Bluey, are you sure you're not an undiscovered marketing genius? PBS really, really needs you! I can see it now: the new and improved versions of Masterpiece--

"HEATHCLIFF'S ROULETTE RENDEZVOUS"

"THE GREEN BAIZE OF LAS VEGAS"

"THE WILD WOMEN OF GREEN GABLES"

"SPRING BREAK ON THE MOOR"

 

[bluebell]

A post full of nothing at all

Well, dear man, I think it's pretty easy not to read any of the threads I've started. In fact, I'm not sure I would recommend it at all!

"THE WILD WOMEN OF GREEN GABLES"

If the book had been called that I might have enjoyed it more. As it is, I am always that one renegade voice in the crowd who just does not enjoy Anne Shirley and the seven thousand books that chronicled both her own adventures and the adventures of her spawn. *readies for the fallout*



Oh my god. It's happened. I finally have nothing to say.

No, wait. It's not true. I lied. I heard a funny story on Friday. And you need to keep in mind (if you are indeed reading this thread and have something to keep in mind) that when I say it was funny, I mean that I laughed at it. At the time. And with my sense of humor. At work.
That's a miry bog of crap right there, folks. So don't expect anything.

A friend of a work friend is a bartender.

--- Oh, you also need to know that I am absolute RUBBISH at telling stories, which also effectively counts against any humor quotient I expect to hit ---​

On Thursday night this woman came into the bar all decked out and looking, you know...
She asked for a drink and made sure to specify that it needed to come with a cherry.
The bartender-friend said, "Oh honey, you lost that cherry a long time ago..."
And she looked him dead in the eye and responded, "I may have lost the cherry but I still have the box it came in."

 

[jomar]

Dirty.

 

[tickledkitty]

Dontcha think Bluey's AV looks like little tongues?

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

I once told a woman I was sleeping with "If you can suck a dick, you can take a joke."

I went without a dick sucking for some time after that remark.

 

[bluebell]

Dirty.

Dontcha think Bluey's AV looks like little tongues?

I seriously cannot take you two anywhere.

I once told a woman I was sleeping with "If you can suck a dick, you can take a joke."

I went without a dick sucking for some time after that remark.

I hope it got made up to you in kind (and with interest). I imagine periods of non-ensuckment can be damaging.
Also, is it okay that that made me laugh?

 

[tickledkitty]

I seriously cannot take you two anywhere.

You LOVE us.