Does Being In Love Make Sex Better?

[belleanderson]

What is your opinion on this? Do you feel like the best sex is really just about sex? Or is it enhanced and made even better by the emotional loving connection between two people?

 

[PapaDan]

What is your opinion on this? Do you feel like the best sex is really just about sex? Or is it enhanced and made even better by the emotional loving connection between two people?

Of course it's better when there's love.

 

[EctoJohn]

I think so.
Being in love adds that little something that just can't be found in a normal hookup.
Not that a hookup is bad, mind you, but the added positive emotion makes it all that much better.

 

[WriterGirl2002]

100% and good sex can make you fall in love

 

[policywank]

A strong emotional connection adds to the sexual experience. But traditional romantic notion of "being in love" isn't the only type of strong emotional connection. And while the emotional connection enhances the physical considerations, it doesn't supersede or negate them.

 

[KyleR215]

I think it can be both.

Both have their time and place. Advantages and disadvantages.

 

[youneedatonguelashing]

They are different

Brand new white hot sheet shredding passion is great, very thrilling. But deep intimacy is my turn on, play that starts at good morning and last until you fall asleep. They are different, i want both, but if i had to choose, I want lasting love.

 

[Islander55]

Being in love and having sex with someone can be very intense. Especially a new love. I have been married for 39 years so there is not much we have not done and have had a lot of good times. That said, I find sex can be very satisfying with a friend. No other issues to deal with other than have some fun. Taking a new partner can be very exciting and I think I might find it easier to let myself go and try something new with a casual partner than with my husband.

 

[Escierto]

When my girlfriend and I first met in person, we immediately went to the hotel and had sex. Afterwards we slept and when we woke up, we got dressed and I watched her putting on her makeup. She turned to me and said, “I feel like we are married now.” I said, “Me too.” Ever since that moment two years ago we have been deeply in love.

 

[WhO2]

What is your opinion on this? Do you feel like the best sex is really just about sex? Or is it enhanced and made even better by the emotional loving connection between two people?

In my opinion sex with the one you love is definitely better than sex with a stranger

 

[HoldYouDown]

Not necessarily. There are a lot of factors involved with great sex - not all are always in play at the same time. I think if love always made sex better, the world would be much different.

 

[J_Bone]

I mean, it can't hurt. However probably the top 5 sex I've ever had were with women I had no emotional feelings for whatsoever.......in fact a couple of them I couldn't stand personally, but they were fucking amazing in bed.

 

[UtilityCurve]

Sex is infinitely better in the presence of love. In fact, it is so much better that it's awkward to use the same word for knocking boots without love as it is with, they are so different, with no gradations between.

I used to think it was bullshit. It is not.

 

[oneblueye]

hey...

What is your opinion on this? Do you feel like the best sex is really just about sex? Or is it enhanced and made even better by the emotional loving connection between two people?

the emotional aspect always makes it more fulfilling for me---, but realistically,
mindblowing sex is always gonna be that-, with or without the emotional thang.

 

[Goldenfinger]

Most definitely. But it’s not the same thing. Making love vs fucking.

 

[Erodicus]

In general terms, my experience is that many guys find casual sex with no strings attached to be all they want, but most women I know prefer some deep emotional attachment.

 

[GoingBackToBed]

Absolutely yes for me.

 

[ukcouple4play]

I still marvel at the intensely passionate nature of sex with my SO. Nearly 10 years on, every time is just this physical explosion that occurs completely below the level of consciousness that I struggle to explain, especially as most times we fuck it's pretty vanilla and over in 10 minutes! Mentally, I want kink, I want variety, I want exploration and I want my mind stimulated as much as my cock. But with her, I don't know, the way she feels, the way she smells, the way she moves, the way she moans, it just floors me every time. Is it like that because I love her or do I love her because it's like that?

 

[Dutchslut39]

What is your opinion on this? Do you feel like the best sex is really just about sex? Or is it enhanced and made even better by the emotional loving connection between two people?

I have the best sex with my BF, the love of my life.

We fuck with a lot of other people but that's just sex and being horny.

with him it's lovemaking.

 

[naughtymind]

Most definitely. But it’s not the same thing. Making love vs fucking.

I'd respectfully disagree with this statement. I've had plenty of both "lovemaking" and "fucking" with women I was in love with. Both are wonderful in their own right of course.

As to the original question, I find that there's simply no comparison. Sex with a woman I'm in love with just goes so many layers deeper. The trust, the communication, knowing all the little things that drive her crazy and her knowing all of mine, being able to play off each others fantasies, etc, etc, etc. There is obviously something exciting about a new partner, where everything is a bit of a surprise; but I just find that there are usually some limits to just how deep things go emotionally or psychologically with someone new.

I think that there is an important distinction to be made about being in love though: there is having sex with someone who you love...and then there's having sex with someone who you are in love with. I can think of examples where I've loved someone, but didn't really feel the same kinds of chemistry that leads to really intense sex. I guess when I think of being in love, I am thinking of also being in complete lust for her too.

 

[policywank]

I feel as though this is one of those "all other things being equal" questions. In other words, all other things being equal is sex better with someone with whom you are in love and have a deep personal connection? Yes absolutely. I think that an emotional and psychological connection enhances sex and love is the most powerful of all.

But all other things are usually not equal. Being in love doesn't magically transform any of us into good lovers or open up a secret portal into a world where a partner's lack of sexual aptitude is not relevant to our own sexual pleasure. Passions wane over time. And the novelty of new experiences and variety does enhance pleasure. Those are all examples of other things that are not equal which are legitimate factors in sexual pleasure.

 

[lil_jenni]

Sex with my Husband is fantastic, and I love him madly. But sex with him was fantastic from the start when we had just met. We are physically well suited for each other. Having said that, I do believe the emotional component is a factor in the sex still being fantastic all these years later. We work well together on many levels. But being in love with him is not in and of itself what makes the sex so great. It's an important part, but not the only part.

 

[clevermoniker]

The best sex I ever had was a one-night stand...until I met my wife, that is. Then sex with her was (and is) the best I've ever had. And there were plenty of women in between, but none were as good in bed as the one-night stand and my wife. And I was in love with one of the others.

It's just about the chemistry at the time. The ONS was more animalistic and was sex between two people who had been lacking a real sexual connection for a long time and we both knew we'd only have that one night. That made it uninhibited and passionate.

I'm not sure it's love of my wife that makes it so good, but that we both know exactly what the other likes, and that's from years of trial and error and experimenting with new things (and it's been 18 years of being together and 15 years of marriage).

 

[WhO2]

In general terms, my experience is that many guys find casual sex with no strings attached to be all they want, but most women I know prefer some deep emotional attachment.

Nest movie line ever - "Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."

 

[policywank]

Nest movie line ever - "Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."

I hear ya, but I think that the gender difference in sexual attitudes is generally overstated. I want to have some kind of connection with a sex partner, but it doesn't need to be particularly intense or deep. It is more a matter of wanting to be attracted to his mind and personality as opposed to purely his physicality.