Does anyone have ....

[matriarch]

Woman crashes car while teaching dog to drive!!

A woman in Hohhot, the capital of north China's Inner Mongolia region, crashed her car while giving her dog a driving lesson, the official Xinhua News Agency reported on August 28, 2006.

No injuries were reported although both vehicles were slightly damaged, it said.

The woman, known only by her surname, Li, said her dog “was fond of crouching on the steering wheel and often watched her drive,” according to Xinhua. “She thought she would let the dog 'have a try' while she operated the accelerator and brake,” the report said. “They did not make it far before crashing into an oncoming car.”

Xinhua did not say what kind of dog or vehicles were involved but Li paid for repairs.

 

[matriarch]

Penguins fall for pilots.

"British pilots stationed in the Falkland Islands invented a game they played with local penguins, a Mexican news report claimed.

The pilots found a beach with thousands of penguins and noticed that the birds seemed captivated by the planes flying overhead. As the planes flew along the beach, the pilots noticed thousands of penguins turning their heads in unison to watch the planes.

So the pilots flew toward the ocean, forcing the penguins to look up, then they flew straight toward and over the penguins, causing the birds to look further back until they toppled over."

Bastards.........but I did giggle at the image. Sowry.

 

[matriarch]

Live reindeer were taking part in a Christmas display at a garden center at Franklin Park, Pennsylvania, when two of the reindeer escaped. Donner was quickly recaptured, but Blitzen took off for nearby forests.

A hunter saw the reindeer, thought it was local game, and shot it.

Garden centre employee Jennifer Smith told television station WTAE TV: “We're all very upset and distraught. We feel like we've lost a member of our family.”


Well......sad, but how the hell was the hunter supposed to know that deer, in the forest, was Blitzen??? I mean, c'mon people !! Sheesh.

 

[matriarch]

Bees set up home ....... in a house.

Returning from a three-week vacation, Vincent and Trish Caminiti of Bayport, New York, found a colony of 20,000 bees had set up house in the walls of their home.

Beekeepers were called to evict the bees and they found about four pounds of honey and 10,000 baby bees in the walls.

Neighbors told the Caminitis that the bees arrived in a thick black swarm that buzzed so loud that some people thought it was an aircraft.

The swarm entered the house one at a time through a tiny half-inch hole in one wall of the house.


*shudder*................

 

[matriarch]

Armed brawl over.......a pothole ????

Four Mexicans were killed when a dispute between two Tzotzil Indian families over a pothole in the street escalated into a full-blown shootout.

One of the families closed off the cracked concrete and mud road in the town of Banelos in the poor southern state of Chiapas to fill in a hole left by heavy rain.

That angered a family with a transport business who needed to get their truck through, the Mexican daily Reforma said on Tuesday.

Insults led to blows and finally the two families shot at each other using various caliber guns and a hefty AR-15 rifle, Reforma said. Shootings are not uncommon in Mexico's little-policed indigenous regions, where many take the law into their own hands.

A photo showed somber-looking locals standing in two groups on either side of the pothole -- now filled in with rubble and fit to be driven over again.

 

[matriarch]

LONDON (AFP) - A suspect was slammed in the cells after he broke wind in a British court then burst out laughing about it.

Joseph Wildy let rip and refused to apologise after he had a fit of the giggles with his co-defendants on Tuesday.

However, magistrate Simon Bridge, sitting in Blackpool, on the northwest coast of England, was not amused by his interruption. He found Wildy in contempt of court and ordered him to be locked up.

After cooling off in the cells, Wildy returned to court 90 minutes later and apologised to Bridge.

"He was laughing in court, that's why he was found in contempt," said a court spokeswoman.

"It was for interrupting the proceedings by laughing, and then refusing to apologise."

Wildy pleaded not guilty to handling stolen goods and was bailed to reappear at a later date at the same court.

But.....but....its so hard NOT to giggle in those kind of situations. Isn't it??

 

[matriarch]

OK, I'm stopping now.

If you can't find anything in there to at least make you giggle for a few seconds.............well..........

 

[matriarch]

I was wrong......I just HAVE to share this one!!

October 09, 2006 12:00am
Article from: The Australian

A WOMAN has suffered severe burning to her anus after being struck by lightning which hit her in the mouth and passed right through her body.

Natasha Timarovic, 27, was cleaning her teeth at home when lightning struck the building.

She said: "I had just put my mouth under the tap to rinse away the toothpaste when the lightning must have struck the building.

I don't remember much after that, but I was later told that the lightning had travelled down the water pipe and struck me on the mouth, passing through my body.

It was incredibly painful, I felt it pass through my torso and then I don't remember much at all." Doctors at the city hospital where she was treated for burns to the mouth and rear said: "The accident is bizarre but not impossible.

She was wearing rubber bathroom shoes at the time and so instead of earthing through her feet it appears the electricity shot out of her backside," a medic told local television news channel, 24 Sata.

"It appears to have earthed through the damp shower curtain that she was touching as she bent over to put her mouth under the tap. If she had not been wearing the shoes she would probably have been killed by the blast."

OH
MY
GODDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Trinique_Fire]

i always knew anal was dangerous.

 

[arienette]

i always knew anal was dangerous.

You don't know the half of it.